The Adonis Complex: How to Identify, Treat and Prevent Body Obsession in Men and Boys


Harrison G. Pope Jr. - 2000
    More than ever, men are struggling with the same enormous pressure to achieve physical perfection that women have dealt with for centuries. From compulsive weightlifting to steroid use, from hair plugs to cosmetic surgery, growing numbers of men are taking the quest for perfect muscles, skin, and hair too far, crossing the line from normal interest to pathological obsession. This new obsession with appearance, known as the Adonis Complex, afflicts boys and men of all ages and from all walks of life. In its more severe forms, the Adonis Complex poses a health threat that is as insidious and deadly as eating disorders are for women and girls. But this groundbreaking book offers hope and help for the men caught in the oppressive cycle of body obsession.Harrison Pope, Katharine Phillips, and Roberto Olivardia reveal the often hidden signs and symptoms of the Adonis Complex.Weightlifting and exercise compulsions: Their quest for a more muscular body can become so single-minded that men often sacrifice relationships and career goals and may even stunt their emotional and physical development.Body Dysmorphic Disorder: Unlike healthy men, those with body image problems have no idea how they really look -- and obsessively try to fix flaws that others don't notice. Boys as young as six or eight report body dissatisfaction, and as a result many suffer loss of self-esteem or depression.Eating disorders: Several millionmen have suffered from compulsive binge eating or from anorexia nervosa and bulimia. Countless others with milder forms of eating disorders diet and worry about being fat even when they actually look just fine.Steroid abuse: Trying to achieve increasingly unrealistic physical ideals, more than a million men -- including a large number of teenagers -- are abusing steroids. Millions more are buying billions of dollars' worth of "muscle-building" food supplements and diet aids.Creating a down-to-earth program for change, the authors introduce two original diagnostic tools. The first, a simple thirteen-question quiz, helps readers identify the extent of their body image concerns. The second, the Body Image Test, helps readers learn how they perceive their bodies and how they think others see them. Using the compelling and insightful stories of many boys and men, the authors address a wide range of topics, from coping with sex and intimacy problems and difficulties at work, to low self-esteem and shame. They also explain how to seek medication treatment and specialized forms of therapy for more extreme cases. With this book, men suffering from the Adonis Complex will have the power to change their lives.

The Art of the Possible


Alexandra Stoddard - 1995
    Now in    The Art of the Possible she adds wise words to the dream of creating a perfectly beautiful home, reminding all those who seek beauty to overcome the confines of perfectionism in favor of freedom that allows creativity to flourish.

Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic


Esther Perel - 2006
    She invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.In her 20 years of clinical experience, Perel has treated hundreds of couples whose home lives are empty of passion. They describe relationships that are open and loving, yet sexually dull. What is going on?In this explosively original book, Perel explains that our cultural penchant for equality, togetherness, and absolute candor is antithetical to erotic desire for both men and women. Sexual excitement doesn't always play by the rules of good citizenship. It is politically incorrect. It thrives on power plays, unfair advantages, and the space between self and other. More exciting, playful, even poetic sex is possible, but first we must kick egalitarian ideals and emotional housekeeping out of our bedrooms.While Mating in Captivity shows why the domestic realm can feel like a cage, Perel's take on bedroom dynamics promises to liberate, enchant, and provoke. Flinging the doors open on erotic life and domesticity, she invites us to put the "X" back in sex.©2006 Esther Perel (P)2006 HarperCollins Publishers

The Rational Male


Rollo Tomassi - 2013
    The book is the compiled, ten-year core writing of author/blogger Rollo Tomassi from therationalmale.com. Rollo Tomassi is one of the leading voices in the globally growing, male-focused online consortium known as the "Manosphere". Outlined are the concepts of positive masculinity, the feminine imperative, plate theory, operative social conventions and the core psychological theory behind Game awareness and "red pill" ideology. Tomassi explains and outlines the principles of intergender social dynamics and foundational reasoning behind them.

Anatomy of Love: A Natural History of Mating, Marriage, and Why We Stray


Helen Fisher - 1992
    Since then, Fisher has conducted pioneering brain research on lust, romantic love, and attachment; gathered data on more than 80,000 people to explain why you love who you love; and collected information on more than 30,000 men and women on sexting, hooking up, friends with benefits, and other current trends in courtship and marriage. And she presents a new, scientifically based and optimistic perspective on relationships in our digital age—what she calls “slow love.”This is a cutting-edge tour de force that traces human family life from its origins in Africa over 20 million years ago to the Internet dating sites and bedrooms of today. And it’s got it all: the copulatory gaze and other natural courting ploys; the who, when, where, and why of adultery; love addictions; her discovery of four broad chemically based personality styles and what each seeks in romance; the newest data on worldwide (biologically based) patterns of divorce; how and why men and women think differently; the real story of women, men, and power; the rise—and fall—of the sexual double standard; and what brain science tells us about how to make and keep a happy partnership.

How to Date Men When You Hate Men


Blythe Roberson - 2019
    You'll have a blast reading this and then date...or not date anyone because you are living your best single life with new best friend Roberson by your side." - Phoebe Robinson, New York Times bestselling author of You Can't Touch My Hair

The End of Absence: Reclaiming What We've Lost in a World of Constant Connection


Michael Harris - 2014
    What does this unavoidable fact mean?For future generations, it won't mean anything very obvious. They will be so immersed in online life that questions about the Internet's basic purpose or meaning will vanish.But those of us who have lived both with and without the crowded connectivity of online life have a rare opportunity. We can still recognize the difference between Before and After. We catch ourselves idly reaching for our phones at the bus stop. Or we notice how, mid-conversation, a fumbling friend dives into the perfect recall of Google.In this eloquent and thought-provoking book, Michael Harris argues that amid all the changes we're experiencing, the most interesting is the one that future generations will find hardest to grasp. That is the end of absence-the loss of lack. The daydreaming silences in our lives are filled; the burning solitudes are extinguished. There's no true "free time" when you carry a smartphone. Today's rarest commodity is the chance to be alone with your own thoughts.

Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness and Transform Your Life


Lauren Mackler - 2009
    Others settle for unfulfilling relationships out of a deep-seated fear of being alone. In Solemate, Lauren Mackler provides a groundbreaking road map for achieving mastery of your own life so you can experience a sense of wholeness and well-being whether you're on your own or in a relationship. It's about becoming the person you were meant to be, treating yourself well, and shedding the old beliefs and behaviors that limit your ability to realize your greatest potential. It's about becoming your own cherished solemate.Drawing from her own experiences; those of her clients; and the fields of psychology, physiology, sociology, holistic healing, and strategic business practices, Mackler has developed a unique program for reclaiming your innate wholeness. This gradual, step-by-step process involves understanding where your self-defeating patterns come from and how to move beyond them. She helps you uncover and retrieve your authentic self- who you really are beneath the layers of life conditioning. This program will help you live in a more conscious and deliberate way and align your actions with the results you want in your life.A renowned coach, workshop facilitator, and keynote speaker, Mackler guides you through a process that, until now, has only been available through her coaching programs and Mastering the Art of Aloneness workshops. Through quizzes, exercises, and guided journaling, she helps you:·     Identify the limiting beliefs, fears, and behaviors that keep you from feeling whole and happy·     Learn to override these habitual patterns and manage your fears·     Uncover your authentic self·     Create a life vision and action plan to help you achieve any goal you set for yourself, and·     Build inner and outer support systems that help you bring your vision to lifeSolemate is about mastering the art of aloneness. But it's not about being alone. It's a book for people who want to enhance the quality of their lives by improving their relationships with themselves and with others. Solemate gives you the tools you need to develop the self-awareness, life skills, and emotional intelligence to live a full, happy, successful, and financially secure life-with or without a partner.

Delusions of Gender: How Our Minds, Society, and Neurosexism Create Difference


Cordelia Fine - 2005
    Even though the glass ceiling is cracked, most women stay comfortably beneath it, and everywhere we hear about vitally important “hardwired” differences between male and female brains. The neuroscience we read about in magazines, newspaper articles, books, and sometimes even scientific journals increasingly tells a tale of two brains, and the result is more often than not a validation of the status quo. Women, it seems, are just too intuitive for math, men too focused for housework.Drawing on the latest research in neuroscience and psychology, Cordelia Fine debunks the myth of hardwired differences between men’s and women’s brains, unraveling the evidence behind such claims as men’s brains aren’t wired for empathy, and women’s brains aren’t made to fix cars. She then goes one step further, offering a very different explanation of the dissimilarities between men’s and women’s behavior. Instead of a “male brain” and a “female brain,” Fine gives us a glimpse of plastic, mutable minds that are continuously influenced by cultural assumptions about gender.Delusions of Gender provides us with a much-needed corrective to the belief that men’s and women’s brains are intrinsically different--a belief that, as Fine shows with insight and humor--all too often works to the detriment of ourselves and our society.

Suzanne Somers' Get Skinny on Fabulous Food


Suzanne Somers - 1999
    This lifestyle-altering book provides you with:* The guilt-free way to lose weight and reprogram your metabolism -- including more than 100 delicious Somersized recipes that leave you both satisfied and indulged* Breakthrough research on food and nutrition that changes the way you think about your body* Moving personal testimonials guaranteed to motivate and encourage you* An easy-to-follow weight-loss plan that teaches you how to combine foods properly so that you'll get, and stay, skinny without feeling deprivedJoin the millions of people who have lost weight safely and effectively with Get Skinny on Fabulous Food and start celebrating good health and good times with Suzanne's delectable, simple, and balanced Somersized meals.

The Man They Wanted Me to Be: Toxic Masculinity and a Crisis of Our Own Making


Jared Yates Sexton - 2019
    Jared Yates Sexton alternates between an examination of his working class upbringing and historical, psychological, and sociological sources that examine the genesis of toxic masculinity and its consequences for society.As progressivism changes American society, and globalism shifts labor away from traditional manufacturing, the roles that have been prescribed to men since the Industrial Revolution have been rendered as obsolete. Donald Trump's campaign successfully leveraged male resentment and entitlement, and now, with Trump as president and the rise of the #MeToo movement, it’s clearer than ever what a problem performative masculinity is.Deeply personal and thoroughly researched, The Man They Wanted Me to Be examines how we teach boys what’s expected of men in America, and the long term effects of that socialization—which include depression, suicide, misogyny, and, ultimately, shorter lives. Sexton turns his keen eye to the establishment of the racist patriarchal structure which has favored white men, and investigates the personal and societal dangers of such outdated definitions of manhood.

Beauty Sick: How the Cultural Obsession with Appearance Hurts Girls and Women


Renee Engeln - 2017
    They don’t want to be Barbie dolls but, like generations of women before them, are told they must look like them. They’re angry about the media’s treatment of women but hungrily consume the very outlets that belittle them. They mock modern culture’s absurd beauty ideal and make videos exposing Photoshopping tricks, but feel pressured to emulate the same images they criticize by posing with a "skinny arm." They understand that what they see isn’t real but still download apps to airbrush their selfies. Yet these same young women are fierce fighters for the issues they care about. They are ready to fight back against their beauty-sick culture and create a different world for themselves, but they need a way forward.In Beauty Sick, Dr. Renee Engeln, whose TEDx talk on beauty sickness has received more than 250,000 views, reveals the shocking consequences of our obsession with girls’ appearance on their emotional and physical health and their wallets and ambitions, including depression, eating disorders, disruptions in cognitive processing, and lost money and time. Combining scientific studies with the voices of real women of all ages, she makes clear that to truly fulfill their potential, we must break free from cultural forces that feed destructive desires, attitudes, and words—from fat-shaming to denigrating commentary about other women. She provides inspiration and workable solutions to help girls and women overcome negative attitudes and embrace their whole selves, to transform their lives, claim the futures they deserve, and, ultimately, change their world.Duration: 11 hr., 45 min., 39 sec.

Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: And How You Can Make Yours Last


John M. Gottman - 1994
    Now you can use his tested methods to evaluate, strengthen, and maintain your own long-term relationship.This breakthrough book guides you through a series of self-tests designed to help you determine what kind of marriage you have, where your strengths and weaknesses are, and what specific actions you can take to help your marriage. You'll also learn that more sex doesn't necessarily improve a marriage, frequent arguing will not lead to divorce, financial problems do not always spell trouble in a relationship, wives who make sour facial expressions when their husbands talk are likely to be separated within four years and there is a reason husbands withdraw from arguments—and there's a way around it. Dr. Gottman teaches you how to recognize attitudes that doom a marriage—contempt, criticism, defensiveness, and stonewalling—and provides practical exercises, quizzes, tips, and techniques that will help you understand and make the most of your relationship. You can avoid patterns that lead to divorce, and—Why Marriages Succeed or Fail will show you how.

Secrets About Men Every Woman Should Know


Barbara De Angelis - 1990
    Relationships psychologist De Angelis reveals the 6 biggest mistakes women make with men, how to spot - and avoid - the men that will give you the most trouble, men's top twenty turnoffs, and how to get the man you love to open up.

Pink Brain, Blue Brain: How Small Differences Grow into Troublesome Gaps — and What We Can Do About It


Lise Eliot - 2009
    As a result, we've come to accept that boys can't focus in a classroom and girls are obsessed with relationships. That's just the way they're built. In Pink Brain Blue Brain, neuroscientist Lise Eliot turns that thinking on its head. Based on years of exhaustive research and her own work in the new field of plasticity, Eliot argues that infant brains are so malleable that a few small differences at birth become amplified over time, as parents and teachers—and the culture at large—unwittingly reinforce gender stereotypes. Perhaps surprisingly, children themselves exacerbate the differences, by playing to their modest strengths. They constantly exercise those “ball-throwing” or “doll-cuddling” circuits, rarely straying from their comfort zones. But this, says Eliot, is just what they need to do. And parents can help, if they know how and when to intervene. Presenting the latest science at every developmental stage, from birth to puberty, she zeroes in on the precise differences between boys and girls, erasing harmful stereotypes. Boys are not, in fact, “better at math” but at certain kinds of spatial reasoning. Girls are not naturally more empathetic, they’re just encouraged to express their feelings. By appreciating how sex differences emerge—rather than assuming them to be fixed biological facts—we can help all children reach their fullest potential, close the troubling gaps between boys and girls, and ultimately end the gender wars that currently divide us.