How to Move to Canada: A Discontented American's Guide to Canadian Relocation


André Du Broc - 2016
    If you or someone you know is discontented, distressed, or downright disturbed, maybe the Great White North is right for you, eh. But how much do you really know about Canada? Can you do a job that Canada needs (do you play hockey, drill for oil, or make poutine?)? Can you identify the best Canadian province for your lifestyle (lots of tundra or just some tundra?)? Can you master the proper pronunciation of "sorry"? What strange wizardry is the Canadian government? Is maple syrup acceptable substitution for currency? At long last, How to Move to Canada can help make your vague threat into a cold Canadian reality. This book is also full of activities such as: Color the flag of your new homeland Match the strange Canuck dialect with their local definitions And more! PLEASE NOTE: This is a humor book. It won't really help you emigrate. Rather, it's a subversive mix of real information on the Great White North plus a hilarious look at all the reasons why you won't like it there any better — and why they probably won't have you anyway.

Hidden Mickeys: A Field Guide to Walt Disney World's Best Kept Secrets


Steven Barrett
    Author Barrett adds to the fun of finding them by turning the search into six scavenger hunts, complete with clues, hints, and points to be scored. You'll find more than 200 new Mickey sightings in this edition over 1,000 hidden Mickeys in all. Fun for all ages!

Your Bones: How You Can Prevent Osteoporosis & Have Strong Bones for Life Naturally


Lara U. Pizzorno - 2011
    Today, by following the recommendations discussed in this book, she has strong, healthy bones. The medicines prescribed for osteoporosis should be your last choice: not only do they have terrible side effects, they cause retention of old, brittle bone instead of creating new, healthy bone! Your Bones will be an important handbook for anyone wanting to prevent osteoporosis in later life.

Mock the Week: This Year's Book!


Ewan Phillips - 2009
    Packed with enough jokes to fill a whole new series, "Mock the Week: This Year's Book! "is a colourful riot of near-the-knuckle humour; the perfect gift for the show's devoted fans this Christmas. Categories include:UNLIKELY DICTIONARY DEFINITIONS: Fart (noun) - expulsion of trapped methane from the anus, possibly the funniest thing ever.UNLIKELY AGONY AUNT LETTERS: Dear Agony Aunt, I keep getting dangerous advice from hugely unqualified people - what do you suggest I do?CARDS YOU NEVER SEE IN A NEWSAGENT'S WINDOW: Child Minder Available - He may be small, but he's rock hard.UNLIKELY OBITUARIES: Died suddenly and peacefully on an electric chair at the New York State Penitentiary.UNNERVING THINGS TO HEAR IN A MEDICAL EXAM: 'So how bad is this premature . . . eeearrgh!'UNSUCCESSFUL JOB APPLICATIONS: You must hire me, before I kill again!

You Know You're Filipino If...: A Pinoy Primer


Neni Sta. Romana-Cruz
    Pick up a copy today and find out what makes Pinoys stand out in a crowd!

The Book of General Ignorance


John Lloyd - 2006
    It’ll have you scratching your head wondering why we even bother to go to school.Think Magellan was the first man to circumnavigate the globe, baseball was invented in America, Henry VIII had six wives, Mount Everest is the tallest mountain? Wrong, wrong, wrong, and wrong again. You’ll be surprised at how much you don’t know! Check out THE BOOK OF GENERAL IGNORANCE for more fun entries and complete answers to the following:How long can a chicken live without its head?About two years.What do chameleons do?They don’t change color to match the background. Never have; never will. Complete myth. Utter fabrication. Total Lie. They change color as a result of different emotional states.How many legs does a centipede have?Not a hundred.How many toes has a two-toed sloth?It’s either six or eight.Who was the first American president?Peyton Randolph.What were George Washington’s false teeth made from?Mostly hippopotamus.What was James Bond’s favorite drink?Not the vodka martini.

Spike Milligan: Man of Letters


Spike Milligan - 2013
    Unlike his scripts, poetry, fiction or even his unique war memoirs, these letters show Milligan's talent raw and unvarnished - irreverent, often brazen, sometimes cutting, frequently outrageous - a reflection of his complex personality. Spike Milligan: Man of Letters presents a rich selection of the funniest and most revealing of his missives - most of which have never been seen before. It includes correspondence with the most famous politicians, actors, celebrities and rock stars of his day, and takes the reader behind the scenes in his wrangles with producers, publishers, editors and his impervious manager-agent. It also includes letters to a host of unlikely individuals on some surprising subjects: rounded teabags ('what did you do with the corners?'), backless hospital gowns ('beyond my comprehension'), heartfelt apologies ('pardon me for being alive') and the pressing issue of the imbalance of male and female ducks in London's parks. Here, then, is the real Spike: obsessive, rude, generous and relentlessly witty. Spike Milligan (1918-2002) was one of the greatest and most influential comedians of the twentieth century. Over the course of his astonishing career, he wrote over eighty books of fiction, poetry, plays, cartoons, children's stories and his unique war memoirs. Norma Farnes was Spike Milligan's agent, manager, mother confessor and friend for thirty-six years. Her books include Spike: An Intimate Memoir, Memories of Milligan and Milligan's Meaning of Life. She lives with her partner in London and Yorkshire.

INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES ULTIMATE COLLECTION: 3000+ Motivational Quotations With Special Humor Section


Darryl Marks - 2011
    Life is a beauty, admire it. Life is a dream, realize it. Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it. Life is a game, play it. Life is a promise, fulfil it. Life is sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it. Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is a tragedy, confront it. Life is an adventure, dare it. Life is luck, make it. Life is life, fight for it!” Mother Teresa Do you feel down sometimes and in need of inspiration?Do you want the largest collection of Inspirational Quotes you can get to give you the few words of encouragement you need, a collection that covers topics from ‘Motivation’ to ‘Destiny’ to ‘Love’?Do you want a collection that even includes a special Humor section to make you smile and laugh?Then you want this collection from Everlasting Flames Publishing - designed for You!“Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.“Better to light a candle than curse the darkness.” Chinese Proverb THE 'MUST-HAVE' COLLECTIONWe all feel at a loss sometimes and need some simple pick me ups to help us become motivated and in control once more.That’s why this Inspirational Quote Ultimate Collection was created. “Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.” Antoine de Saint ExuperyTHE BIGGEST COLLECTION AVAILABLEIn this wonderful collection you get over 3000 fantastic quotes and amazing sayings, to inspire you every day, to help achieve your goals! EASY TABLE OF CONTENTSThe collection has an easy Table of Contents, dividing the quotes into different topics, such as ‘Inspiration’, ‘Determination’ and ‘Finding Happiness’.This makes it easy for you to jump to a section for the special pick me up you need at a specific moment.All the quotes are drawn from famous people and personalities from around the world, Socrates to Churchill to Tony Robins, motivational speakers to great philosophers and writers.“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow’.” Mary Anne Radmacher HersheySPECIAL UNIQUE HUMOR SECTIONThe collection also includes a very special collection of Humorous Quotes and sayings, showing the funny side of optimism, happiness, money and business, drawn from comedians and famous humorists, from Mark Twain to Henny Youngman to Richard Lewis. Laughter is really the best medicine and its power to heal and motivate should never be overlooked!DON'T MISS OUT!As you read this, you can understand why you have to have this Ultimate Collection, because it is the best collection you can get. At a price that is next to nothing...You already know you want the most complete collection, so don't accept other collections that are lacking. Get this Inspirational Quotes Ultimate Collection right now and let it start changing your world!“It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.” ConfuciusAFTER YOUR PURCHASE PLEASE LOOK UP OUR OTHER TITLES YOU MIGHT LIKEBIBLE VERSES ULTIMATE 500+ Beautiful Verses PLUS SPECIAL CHRISTMAS SECTIONMOTHER QUOTES ULTIMATE 3

I'd Sooner Starve!


Mark Sinclair - 2011
    ever wanted to quit your job...?‘I’d Sooner Starve’ is the amazing true story of one man's quest to escape his monotonous nine-to-five existence and open a charming delicatessen and restaurant in a delightful market town.With honesty, humour and breathtaking naïveté, it records his steep learning curve, radical lifestyle change and the immediate revelation that the customer is not always right!Amidst tales of bulimia, public menstruation, endless abuse and hilarious customer encounters, this eye-opening story unveils what happens after you walk into the boss and say: “I quit!”‘I’d Sooner Starve’ is a shockingly comical tale of culinary highs, customer lows and one woman's unhealthy fixation with thigh-warmed Stilton…‘An absolute hoot!’ ~ Anonymous celebrity chef‘This hits the nail on the head so much I can't believe it! So much so, I can't possibly put my name to it!’~ UK chef‘I am delighted that Mark has written this book. Maybe now people will believe me when I tell them the stories!’ ~ Matt, co-ownerI'd Sooner Starve - the book the celebrity chefs were too afraid to endorse!

More of Dave Barry's Greatest Hits


Dave Barry - 1996
    What Dave Barry did for American history in Dave Barry Slept Here and for getting older in Dave Barry Turns Forty, he does for everything else in America! Tupperware ladies, eighties people and leisure-concept salesmen beware: Dave Barry is on the loose and no one is safe!

Prayers


Sylvia Browne - 2002
    In each case, the words were "infused" into her by her spirit guide Francine, and of course, by God. Granted, these words are a passive mode of prayer, yet the goal is to recharge your spiritual battery so that you'll be able to go out into the world and do God's work. "Over many years of public work, people have often asked me how to pray. My answer is simple, 'Just talk to God, and make your life a living prayer." "These prayers will lift your soul and let you magnify the Lord. They have done so for me and thousands of others. Many miracles have occurred by the power of prayer, and now I want to share these commanding words with you."

Mindsploitation: Asinine Assignments for the Online Homework Cheating Industry


Vernon Chatman - 2013
    But will they write ANY essay you request? Only the WORST of these horrible companies were employed in the composition of Mindsploitation. A GREAT DEAL of money was wasted ACROSS THE GLOBE to commission what may be the dumbest collection of ridiculous assignments in HUMAN HISTORY.What does it say about our society that we can buy a quick custom eulogy for our grandmother, or pay to have a love poem for a mistress prepared by a stranger at the click of a button? How entitled is a culture that keeps these services afloat? Mindsploitation uses such questions as a launching pad for wildly entertaining comedic exchanges. The 50 assignments in this book hilariously explore self-help, spirituality, family, health, diet, pop culture, love, and more.

Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure


Larry Smith - 2008
    When the online storytelling magazine SMITH asked readers to submit six-word memoirs, they proved a whole, real life can be told this way, too. The results are fascinating, hilarious, shocking, and moving. From small sagas of bittersweet romance ("Found true love, married someone else") to proud achievements and stinging regrets ("After Harvard, had baby with crackhead"), these terse true tales relate the diversity of human experience in tasty bite-size pieces. The original edition of Not Quite What I Was Planning spent six weeks on the New York Times bestseller list, and thanks to massive media attention—from NPR to the The New Yorker—the six-word memoir concept spread to classrooms, dinner tables, churches, synagogues, and tens of thousands of blogs. This deluxe edition has been revised and expanded to include more than sixty never-before-seen memoirs. From authors Elizabeth Gilbert, Richard Ford, and Joyce Carol Oates to celebrities Stephen Colbert, Mario Batali, and Joan Rivers to ordinary folks around the world, everyone has a six-word story to tell.

The CollegeHumor Guide to College


CollegeHumor.com - 2006
     CollegeHumor.com is the National Lampoon of its generation. Since its creation in early 2000, the Web site has grown to become the nation’s most recognized comedy brand for young people. With eight million unique visitors a month, quarterly revenues surpassing $1.2 million, and a successful line of merchandise (from T-shirts to novelties)—not to mention a deal with Paramount to create and brand movies with CollegeHumor’s imprimatur—CollegeHumor is truly a franchise in the making. The CollegeHumor Guide to College is a laugh-out-loud depiction of the college experience. Written primarily by two of CollegeHumor’s most popular columnists, Ethan Trex and Streeter Seidell, this guide features all-new material not found on the Web site. It also includes helpful advice—the kind you probably won’t hear from a college counselor—on an array of subjects, such as food, clothing, parents, dating, sex, drinking, and roommates. Filled with outrageous illustrations, this edgy and irreverent book will be indispensable to all present and future undergraduates.

Living With Blind Dogs: A Resource Book and Training Guide for the Owners of Blind and Low-Vision Dogs


Caroline D. Levin - 1998
    Both the veterinary community and dog-owners alike are hailing the arrival of "Living With Blind Dogs".In it, Levin successfully answers the question most commonly asked by devastated pet-lovers: "What do I do now?" Levin came to write this book, when after a decade in human ophthalmic nursing she left that field to manage an ophthalmic veterinary clinic. Here, she was able to meld her knowledge of ophthalmology with her love of dogs, developing badly needed educational materials for clients. Levin took the opportunity to meet many blind dogs and talk with their owners. Caroline Levin is also an award-winning dog trainer. She has an in-depth understanding of canine behavior and the methods used to successfully train dogs. She shows her dogs in obedience competitions and the new sport of musical canine freestyle.