When she’s not covered in fake fur, she sleeps with the wrong men, avoids laundry, sets her vibrator on fire, and dodges her mother’s demanding phone calls. Surrounded by eccentric friends, an offbeat family, peculiar coworkers, and a twenty-four-year-old goldfish, Jane searches for happiness through a maze of dirty clothes and hard lessons.Happy(ish) is set in Ferndale and the metro Detroit area.

    Meet Bridget and Joan: Thelma and Louise on mobility scooters, reluctant residents of the Second Best Magnolia Retirement Home, and lifelong friends joined at the artificial hip.It’s been a wild year for the two rebellious wrinkletons: sherry and shoplifting, Sanatogen and sexting, and a mysterious toy boy who threatens their lifelong friendship and possibly even more…

    

    This edition contains all the material in the original volumes of George, Don't Do That and Stately as a Galleon, including the bloodthirsty 'Ethel' and the unforgettable nursery school monologues.

    So, it is fair to say that his heart isn't really in it. Conrad is also clever, charming, entirely self-serving, self-absorbed and almost completely without scruple — but in Anglo-Saxon England, when the Danish invaders come calling, those are very helpful attributes to have. And so it comes to pass that Conrad finds himself constantly dodging death by various means, some reasonable, some... less so. His tricks include selling his brother monks into slavery, witnessing the death of a king, juggling his loyalties between his own people and the Danes, robbing corpses and impersonating a bishop. By his side throughout is the gentle and honourable Brother Odo, a man so naturally and completely good that even animals sense it. He is no match of wits for the cunning Conrad but can he, perhaps, at least encourage the wayward monk to behave a little better? Conrad Monk and the Great Heathen Army takes the reader on a hugely entertaining and highly informative trip through the Anglo-Saxon world, in the company of a persuasive and likeable — if frequently despicable — tour guide. It is a story that combines painstakingly accurate depictions of history with a fast-moving and often hilarious plot, and as such is bound to appeal to lovers of history, historical fiction and character-driven fiction alike. Edoardo Albert is a writer of Sri Lankan and Italian descent based in London. He has written a number of full length novels, as well as shorter stories for publications ranging from Daily Science Fiction to Ancient Paths. He has written features for papers and magazines including Time Out, Sunday Times and History Today. 'I loved this book as a total immersion historical adventure. Conrad – the hero - is selfish, opportunistic, amoral, and he made me laugh over and over again.' - John Drake, bestselling author of the Fletcher series 'The pagans are coming...but Conrad is one shameless con man who will keep one step ahead of them, and charm you while he does it. He lies—he cheats—and I loved every minute of it.' - Wendy Bertsch, author of Once More, from the Beginning

    Jarvis may be an all-round irritant, but he's harmless & deep down he's got a heart of gold. As his oldest (& only) friend reflects on his life with Jarvis Ham, he wonders what it would have been like if they had never met.

    For his first command after escaping from France, Hornblower is given charge of the royal yacht - and he soon requires all his skill and instinct to prevent disaster!

    Her childhood memories are vividly portrayed, leaving the reader chuckling and enjoying a warm sense of comfortable nostalgia. Photographs and recipes complement page after page of tales that burst with the rich vitality we have come to expect from Victoria Twead.

    Featuring original Ladybird artwork alongside brilliantly funny, brand new text.'Hilarious' StylistOther new titles for Autumn 2017:How it Works: The BrotherHow it Works: The SisterHow it Works: The Baby The Ladybird Book of the ExThe Ladybird Book of the New YouThe Ladybird Book of BallsThe Ladybird Book of the Big Night OutThe Ladybird Book of the Quiet Night InPeople at Work: The Rock Star A Ladybird First Grown-Up Picture BookPrevious titles in the Ladybirds for Grown Ups series: How it Works: The HusbandHow it Works: The WifeHow it Works: The MumHow it Works: The DadThe Ladybird Book of the Mid-Life CrisisThe Ladybird Book of the HangoverThe Ladybird Book of MindfulnessThe Ladybird Book of the ShedThe Ladybird Book of DatingThe Ladybird Book of the HipsterHow it Works: The StudentHow it Works: The CatHow it Works: The DogHow it Works: The Grandparent The Ladybird Book of Red TapeThe Ladybird Book of the People Next DoorThe Ladybird Book of the SickieThe Ladybird Book of the Zombie ApocalypseThe Ladybird Book of the Do-Gooder

    And it is Modi-led India that has this high honour. Prime Minister Modi rolls out the red carpet for the aliens. He receives them at the airport, shows them the sights in Delhi and convinces them to invest in the Make in India campaign. The leader of the alien delegation even holds a broom to promote Swachh Bharat. But what is the real reason the aliens have come to India? Are they friends? Or will they turn foes? Read this hilarious, rib-tickling novel from the author of Unreal Elections to find out.

    The right way, the wrong way and the Top Gear way. Although, on reflection, that's usually just the wrong way, but faster and with more shouting. Anyway, the good news is that this third way of doing things can be applied to almost anything, and that includes motoring in general. All you need is the right guidance, which is where the brand new Top Gear Alternative Highway Code comes in. Top Gear's Altnernative Highway Code will show you how to bring the ambitious but rubbish philosophies of the world's most popular TV programme to your driving, containing advice on general motoring, as well as specific tips on how to deal with common eventualities like a rapidly sinking amphibious camper van, a caravan airship that's just crashed into a small bush, or a stupid home-made limousine that's snapped in half while transporting a top celebrity to an awards ceremony.Road users should not leave home without it.

    This wasn't always the case, but years in the soul-shattering world of retail have made Wade a bitter, cynical young man. Impeded by a lack of direction and nearly infinite levels apathy, Wade idles through his days avoiding waves of annoying customers, his obtrusive boss and any kind of work in general. When a management opportunity makes itself available Wade finds himself facing an unprecedented weekend of opportunity and distraction, a gauntlet of women he can't begin to understand, and a potential mental breakdown that could destroy his personal and professional life at once.

    She rejects the outside world and embarks on a contented existence of isolated self-indulgence. But when her nice neighbours Fred and Geraldine introduce her to the roguishly desirable actor Finbar Flynn the walls of the citadel begin to crack . . .

    That is what troubles animal-phobic, robotics engineer Smith who just got married. He learns that his bride’s dream is to have a farm where there are lots of animals and she can rescue ex-race horses to retrain and find them new homes. But according to a Meyers-Briggs Personality Test that they took for fun, their marriage is doomed. There is only one problem: the newlyweds took the test after the wedding. Whether Smith is chasing a cow named Pork Chop through the woods with a rope, getting locked in a tack room by the family pony, being snubbed by his wife’s dog, or unsuccessfully trying to modernize their barn using the latest technology, the odds are stacked against him. It seems like everything with four legs is out to get him. Will the animals win, forcing Smith to admit defeat, or will he fight to keep his family and the farm together? Enjoy the true, warm, and frequently hilarious stories of Smith’s journey along the bumpy road from his urban robotics lab to a new life on a rural Virginia farm.

    No other contemporary humorist knew the South so well, loved it so passionately, or wrote about it so vividly.