After Jancee Dunn had her baby, she found that she was doing virtually all the household chores, even though she and her husband worked equal hours. She asked herself: How did I become the 'expert' at changing a diaper? Many expectant parents spend weeks researching the best crib or safest car seat, but spend little if any time thinking about the titanic impact the baby will have on their marriage - and the way their marriage will affect their child. Enter Dunn, her well-meaning but blithely unhelpful husband, their daughter, and her boisterous extended family, who show us the ways in which outmoded family patterns and traditions thwart the overworked, overloaded parents of today. On the brink of marital Armageddon, Dunn plunges into the latest relationship research, solicits the counsel of the country's most renowned couples' and sex therapists, canvasses fellow parents, and even consults an FBI hostage negotiator on how to effectively contain an "explosive situation." Instead of having the same fights over and over, Dunn and her husband must figure out a way to resolve their larger issues and fix their family while there is still time. As they discover, adding a demanding new person to your relationship means you have to reevaluate -- and rebuild -- your marriage. In an exhilarating twist, they work together to save the day, happily returning to the kind of peaceful life they previously thought was the sole province of couples without children. Part memoir, part self-help book with actionable and achievable advice, How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids is an eye-opening look at how the man who got you into this position in this first place is the ally you didn't know you had.

    The New York Times bestseller--never shy, frequently crude and always funny, Jenny McCarthy gives the lowdown on pregnancy in the grittiest girlfriend detail Revealing the naked truth about the tremendous joys, the excruciating pains, and the inevitable disfigurement that go along with pregnancy, Jenny McCarthy tells you what you can really expect when you're expecting! From morning sickness and hormonal rage, to hemorrhoids, granny panties, pregnant sex, and the torture and sweet relief that is delivery, Belly Laughs is must-read comic relief for anyone who is pregnant, has ever been pregnant, is trying to get pregnant, or, indeed, has ever been born!

    What if your baby AND you could thrive together? We cure diseases. We create artificial ears using 3-D printers. We solved how to pee in space. We can figure this out--and now Dr. Darria has done just that. An Ivy league-trained physician and mom of two, Dr. Darria combed the latest in medicine, psychology, and holistic health for answers when her own health crises struck. She now brings those solutions to moms everywhere. For moms who just DontHaveTheTime (or energy), Mom Hacks gives you the specific smallest changes that yield the biggest impact for you and your child. Every hack is a mini super-charged solution with an immediate impact. So you feel good, lose the baby weight, and are more present, while raising thriving children--in an entirely do-able, time-saving, with-you-in-the-trenches way. Her humor and personal stories bring warmth and encouragement when mothers need it most. You can be the mother and woman you want to be, and with Mom Hacks, you don't have to listen to anyone who tells you otherwise. It's time for a new mom world order.

    On Becoming Babywise brings hope to the tired and bewildered parents looking for an alternative to sleepless nights and fussy babies. The Babywise Parent Directed Feeding concept has enough structure to bring security and order to your baby's world, yet enough flexibility to give mom freedom to respond to any need at any time. It teaches parents how to lovingly guide their baby's day rather than be guided or enslaved to the infant's unknown needs. The information contained within On Becoming Babywise is loaded with success. Comprehensive breast-feeding follow-up surveys spanning three countries, of mothers using the PDF method verify that as a result of the PDF concepts, 88% breast-feed, compared to the national average of only 54% (from the National Center for Health Statistics). Of these breast-feeding mothers, 80% of them breast-feed exclusively without a formula complement. And while 70% of our mothers are still breast-feeding after six months, the national average encourage to follow demand feeding without any guidelines is only 20%. The mean average time of breast-feeding for PDF moms is 33 1/2 weeks, well above the national average. Over 50% of PDF mothers extend their breast-feeding toward and well into the first year. Added to these statistics is another critical factor. The average breast-fed PDF baby sleeps continuously through night seven to eight hours between weeks seven and nine. Healthy sleep in infants is analogous to healthy growth and development. Find out for yourself why a world of parents and pediatricians utilize the concepts found in On Becoming Babywise.

    After three decades of fatherhood, there are certain things he has learned during his tenure. His way of raising his children involves, of course, lots of humor (don't curse near a mimicking child), but also the sound advice of a lifelong educator (you can't start reading to a baby too early). With PAPADADDY'S BOOK FOR NEW FATHERS, a great storyteller shares his wisdom with other dads, young and old alike. Writing from experience, observation, and his vivid imagination, Clyde Edgerton conveys both caution and joy--mostly joy.

    With full-color photo essays, the author guides readers past good taste, sense and even logic into the magical, mayhem-ridden world known as his life.

    In this classic parody, Thomas Hill presents the testosterone-inspired answer to the best-seller What to Expect When You're Expecting.* This completely revised and updated edition of the best-selling parody humorously guides fathers-to-be through nine months of 21st-century baby preparations.Complete with weird baby names, tips on how to avoid a sympathetic pregnancy, and a discourse on the evolution of ESPN and the role it plays postdelivery, Hill's tome has been thoroughly revised to account for not only the usual father-to-be questions but also the often baffling and amusing technological and medical advances awaiting today's four million expectant dads.* This hilarious month-by-month guide offers new and veteran dads solace, laughter, and a bit of useful information, including a question-and-answer chapter covering basics like "How much does having a baby cost?"; visual charts assessing such things as the breakdown behind the mom-to-be's weight gain; sidebars covering common wife complaints and anticipated purchases; and much more.

    A gifted writer and teacher, Lamott (Crooked Little Heart) is a single mother and ex-alcoholic with a pleasingly warped social circle and a remarkably tolerant religion to lean on. She responds to the changes, exhaustion, and love Sam brings with aplomb or outright insanity. The book rocks from hilarious to unbearably poignant when Sam's burgeoning life is played out against a very close friend's illness. No saccharine paean to becoming a parent, this touches on the rage and befuddlement that dog sweeter emotions during this sea change in one's life.

    Delve deep into the mind of these creatures and learn what makes them tick.

    Recommended reading for all mothers of twins."" Deborah Platek, MD, Director of Maternal Fetal Medicine, Harvard Vanguard Medical Associates The best twin-tested tips used by real moms The stresses that come with raising two babies are numerous - but they are predictable and manageable. From a mom who's been there, Juggling Twins is a funny, realistic, and reassuring guide for every new mom of twins who may be asking herself, ""Can I really pull this off?"" From pregnancy to health issues, to eating, sleeping, bathing, and leaving the house, Juggling Twins is packed with the detailed, authoritative information that parents of multiples crave. Author and mother of twin boys Meghan Regan-Loomis offers an indispensable toolkit of solutions and techniques, designed to create order out of the chaos and help you catch your breath during this daunting and exhilarating time. You'll learn how to: Nurse two babies at the same time, comfortably and efficiently Get exactly the help you need from family and friends in those first few weeks Safely transport two babies at once when it's just you and them Survive the nights by breaking them into shifts (that include you sleeping) Stockpile the right food and supplies in advance of their arrival Maintain your identity and your marriage through the madness Get prepared, stay calm, and count your blessings (two )-raising twins can be a wonderful, intense challenge that draws on the best in you.

    I Hate it Here comes an all-new, even more outrageous and laugh-out-loud funny collection of real letters written by children ages eight to sixteen to their parents about their adventures at summer camp. Written with the same wit and honesty that made the first book a runaway hit, these new letters take the reader on a familiar adventure that conjures up the experience of being away from home, and the hilarious and lasting memories that accompany that special place called sleepaway camp.

    At 32 years old, the recently married author found herself suddenly surrounded by babies, and the expectation of family and friends that she would soon have one herself. Altman’s ambivalence prompted a search for the meaning of motherhood –– one that led her to wear a fake pregnancy belly, attend pre-natal yoga classes, debate experts, and even tend to her very own crying plastic baby. Her reporting led to a surprising and uplifting lesson about life, love and the choices we make. “Baby Steps” is what to expect when you’re not expecting –– a heartfelt and hilarious guide to making the most important decision of your life.After graduating from Columbia University’s Graduate School of Journalism, Mara Altman worked as a staff writer for The Village Voice. In 2009, HarperCollins published Altman's first book, Thanks For Coming: A Young Woman's Quest for an Orgasm, which was optioned as a comedy series by HBO. She has published three best-selling Kindle Singles, and has also written for New York Magazine and The New York Times.Cover design by Adil Dara Kim. Cover photograph by Christopher Lane. Illustrations by Mara Altman.

    We'd just toss out our birth control pills and before we knew it, we'd be rocking our little one to sleep. Little did we know what was in store for us, or the energy it would take to face all of the crazy, unpredictable and (sometimes) irrational emotions we felt along the way. Neither did our husbands. Sound familiar?If your idea of foreplay is screaming, "I'm ovulating; it's time!!!" to your oblivious husband... If your ovulation schedule is ruling your life and every trip to the drug store includes a bulk purchase of pregnancy sticks... If you're running out of answers to the chronic questioning from the pregnancy paparazzi about your plans for parenthood ... Then this is the book for you. Whether it's been three months or three years since you've been trying, the more complicated and overwhelming the process becomes.The Conception Chronicles shares candid humor, hold-nothing-back banter and practical advice on everything that goes along with trying to start a family: from dealing with your fertile friends to the battery of tests you may have to face; from surviving "sex on demand" to navigating the ins and outs of high-tech fertility treatments. This book will guide you through the emotional journey to motherhood, offering compassion and laughter like only your best girlfriends can. And we promise you'll never hear us say, "Relax and you'll be pregnant in no time."

    It’s just that a little psychopath who walks through life 100% convinced that he or she is the center of the universe does not care that you have a heart, a mind, or a soul. You are simply a skin-covered robot tall enough to reach the candy on top of the fridge. And clean up the rage-vomit when you make the fatal mistake of cutting off the crust on your toddler’s toast. (Or not cutting it off—seriously, you can’t win.)Includes:The theory of toddler evolution Mealtime (AKA Hell)Your unraveling lifeAnd how not to die inside

    because he wants to watch Caillou, he’s an a-hole. When your daughter outlines every corner of your living room with a purple crayon, she’s an a-hole. When your rug rats purposely decorate the kitchen ceiling with their smoothies, they’re a-holes. So it’s only natural to want to kill them sometimes. Of course you can’t because you’d go to prison, and then you’d really never get to poop alone again. Plus, there’s that whole loving them more than anything in the whole world thing. Karen Alpert is the writer of the popular blog Baby Sideburns. You may have seen some of her more viral posts like “Ten Things I Really F’ing Want for Mother’s Day,” “Daddy Sticker Chart” and “What NOT to F’ing Buy My Kids this Holiday.” Or you may know her from her Facebook page that has over 130,000 followers. I Heart My Little A-Holes is full of hilarious stories, lists, thoughts and pictures that will make you laugh so hard you’ll wish you were wearing a diaper.