And you’re definitely not alone. There’s Jimmy Carter, forgetting the nuclear launch codes in a suit at the dry cleaners. Rod Stewart fumbling for the name of the intense first love who inspired “Maggie Mae.” G. K. Chesterton writing a long letter to hismother announcing the good news about his engagement—while his mother is in the room with him. Marilyn Monroe blowing the same line through 52 takes during the filming of Some Like It Hot.Celebrating history’s greatest mental lapses, is a perfect impulse book in the fine gift format of Famous Last Words. Not just outlandishly funny, it’s also a book of great comfort—after all, having a senior moment puts you in the company of Einstein, Lincoln, Beethoven, Newton, Toscanini, and a whole assortment of presidents, poets, philosophers, popes, and Nobel Prize–winners. Talk about gaffes. Here are best men forgetting to show up at the wedding. Judges staggered by the incompetence of their previous decisions. Senators frozen in front of TV cameras. Olympic officials gazing absently while bewildered runners continue through the finish line. Bono losing the only copy of his lyrics to a new album. Forget to pick up your copy today!

    It premiered 37 years ago, in 1973, and, after 31 series it finally came to an end last year – even though all its original protagonists – Compo, Foggy, even Nora Batty – are now dead. Remarkably, for a series of such longevity and international appeal, it is all about elderly people, has little action or plot, and is set and filmed in and around the small Yorkshire town of Holmfirth. Now, Andrew Vine, the deputy editor of Yorkshire’s daily newspaper, has written the definitive history of this television phenomenon. It covers the show’s inauspicious beginnings, with low ratings, its endless reinvention as participants like Bill Owen, Michael Bates, Brian Wilde and Kathy Staff retired or died, the appearance of a string of guest stars from John Cleese and Norman Wisdom to Thora Hird and Russ Abbott (both of whom soon found themselves fixtures in the cast), and the ingenious plot contrivances as the protagonists became too old and frail to attempt any of the slapstick stunts with runaway prams – indeed any outdoor action. Holmfirth is now a year-round tourist attraction, and endless repeats and new DVD box sets will ensure a readership for this book for years to come.

    It’s all the thieves who stole his house left behind. And if that weren’t bad enough, a saleswoman named Caroline E61 drops from the sky to sell him a set of encyclopedias and won’t take no for an answer. Can his luck get any worse?In this rip-roaring roller-coaster ride through a brilliantly imagined future of paranoid absurdity, Jonny X will learn the answer soon enough when he falls afoul of a lunatic motorcycle gang nicknamed the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, a relentless Belgian assassin, and his own irate girlfriend. Traversing a cityscape whose neighborhoods are organized by musical genres, running into joke-telling elevators and holographic computer viruses, Jonny is about to learn what a nightmare it’s going to be to get his old life back in a reality warping faster than the speed of the imagination. Outrageous Fortune heralds a marvelous new talent sure to be delightfully altering the minds of readers for years to come.From the Trade Paperback edition.

    Never have so many poets been saying so many interesting things in such lively, up-to-date ways. Yet many people feel shut out or know little about poetry and have no idea where to begin. In this groundbreaking book, Ruth Padel takes fifty-two of the poems she discussed in her newspaper column - a year's worth - and suggests ways of reading them.The poems are by a wide range of living poets, on experiences we all share - love, sex, death, nature, history, war - which show how reading a poem can enhance everyone's life as powerfully and as pleasurably as reading novels or watching a film.

    Yet when Legrand's conviction fails to waiver, they set off on a bizarre journey, accompanied by Jupiter, Legrand's loyal and equally skeptical servant. What follows is a strange tale of coded messages, hidden treasure, and uncanny prophecy that will both enthrall and baffle even the most perceptive readers.Part horror story, part detective fiction, The Gold Bug is an ingenious tale bearing all the hallmarks of Poe's extraordinary narrative skill. It is presented here with The Sphinx, a similarly themed and equally disturbing short story. Wonderfully versatile as an author and best known for his tales of terror and the macabre, Edgar Allan Poe (1809–1849) holds a venerable place in the history of American literature.This edition contains the following short stories:- The Gold Bug- The Sphinx- William Wilson.

    One little swig from the wrong bottle and you go from being an ordinary Dutch sea-captain to an unhappy immortal, drifting around the world with your similarly immortal crew. Little does Cornelius Vanderdecker, the Flying Dutchman, suspect that a chance encounter in an English pub might just lead to the end of his cursed life.FAUST AMONG EQUALS - The management buy-out of Hell wasn't going quite as planned. For a start, there had been that nasty business with the perjurers, and then came the news that the Most Wanted Man in History had escaped. But Kurt 'Mad Dog' Lundqvist, the foremost bounty hunter of all time, is on the case, and he can usually be relied on to get his man - even when that man is Lucky George Faustus ...Exuberant comedy from Tom Holt at his inventive best.This omnibus contains two of Tom Holt's best-loved stories. In Flying Dutch, we learn of the amazing problems drinking can get you into. One little swig from the wrong bottle, and you go from being an ordinary Dutch sea captain to an unhappy immortal, drifting around the world with your similarly immortal crew, suffering from peculiarly whiffy side effects. Little does Cornelius Vanderdecker, the Flying Dutchman, suspect that a chance encounter in an English pub might just lead to the end of his cursed life, one way or another. In Faust Among Equals, the management buy-out of Hell wasn't going quite as planned. For a start, there had been that nasty business with the perjurers, and then came the news that the Most Wanted Man in History had escaped, and all just as the plans for the new theme park, Eurobosch, were underway. But Kurt 'Mad Dog' Lundqvist, the foremost bounty hunter of all time, is on the case, and he can usually be relied on to get his man - even when that man is Lucky George Faustus...Exuberant comedy from Tom Holt at his inventive best.

    As natural accidents occurred without cease, Alex knew Armageddon and the Day of Judgement were near. Somehow he had to bring his beloved heathen, Margrethe, to a state of grace, and, while he was at it, save the rest of the world ....

    What started as a silly way for blogger Danielle Henderson and her classmates to keep track of the feminist theorists they were studying in class quickly turned into an overnight sensation. Packed with 100+ photos and captions throughout -- including the best "Hey girl" lines from the blog and 80 percent brand-new material -- this book is a must-have for feminists and fans of the actor alike. What more could a girl want? You know, besides gender equality and all that.

    

    Love can be shit. Whatever has happened to you, whatever will happen to you, whatever might happen to you, whatever hasn't happened to you, well . . . you're not alone. Andre Jordan's drawings and prose are culled from a life of heartache and unrequited love. Simple, sad, clever, and darkly hilarious, they tell of both dismal places and hopeful realizations.

    It is the story a renowned but exceedingly shy painter, Priam Farll, who assumes the identity of his dead valet, Henry Leek, as a means of avoiding press attention.

    More than three hours of recordings in each collection capture the intimacy of live performance. Stories are alternately funny, sad, moving, and exciting and make a perfect accompaniment to daily activities such as driving, cooking, exercising, and relaxing. Lots of Laughs includes, among others, John Updike's "Farrell's Caddie," read by Charles Keating; Neil Gaiman's "Chivalry," read by Christina Pickles; Ron Carlson's "On the USS Fortitude," read by Laura Esterman; Etgar Keret's "Fatso," read by John Guare; and David Schickler's "Jamaica," read by Isaiah Sheffer.

    Whether you're carving evil messages into your coworker's banana peel or telling your kids that, yes, raisins are actually dehydrated people, there's a certain, sinister-yet-fun draw to really messing with people. In Perhaps I’ve Said Too Much (the much anticipated follow-up to the heralded, award-winning Things Go Wrong For Me), Rodney Lacroix gives the reader some insight on what it's like to live the prankster life. No one is safe, including Rodney himself as not all of his antics go entirely as planned. Join him as he spins some yarns, gives you some new ideas and lets you relive the catastrophic consequences of jokes gone terribly wrong. Complete with original hand-drawn artwork and graphics, one-two punch Brain Nuggets, and the ever-popular Draw Something Files, Perhaps will not disappoint.* (Assumes you are an immature child who enjoys potty humor and making fart noises with your armpits.)

    That is--until the school burns down.Follow Andy on his unlikely journey to the town of Mishap, Utah, where besides teaching math, he finds himself tricked into teaching a summer course on personal relations.Ever since Larry and Tillie Cutler defied the curse of Mishap and got married--and then immediately disappeared in a downed plane--the residents of Mishap are running scared. They all believe that anyone who marries in the town will come to an unseemly and untimely end. But Andy's been hired to fix all that.Meet a cast of lovable characters in a town that's filled with surprises. Captain Matrimony is a delightful read that will make you laugh out loud and keep you guessing as Andy unravels the mystery of a local curse and meets the girl of his dreams.

    These jeweled, intricate poems, like the multilayered "In Search of Evanescence," locate and reflect the America that must be "unseen to be believed."Somewhere between cartographer and stargazer, the Nostalgist links images of water, desert, and myth, returning to Tucson in the monsoons, or seeing Chile in his rearview mirror, all the while creating an intense and vital vision.