It contains the Jewish nursery blueprint, complete with panic room, fireproof wallpaper and guardian ninja, the top-ten list of Jewish 'dont's', the complete timeline of Jewish expulsion, and much more.

    Some are entertainingly bad. But the very worst are instructively bad. Left Behind: A Novel of the Earth's Last Days is even worse than that. Fred Clark has been learning from the relentless awfulness of this book for more than a decade and he invites you to join him on a journey through the horrors and hilarity of one of the worst books ever written.

    Neil Gaiman's contribution to Lovecraft's Cthulhu Mythos.Available from tor.com or neilgaiman.com

    • Exhausting—when you realize you’ll most likely never sleep again--like EVER. • Explosive—OMG these kids spew from both ends! And that’s just the beginning. Whitney shares the ridiculous highs and excruciating lows of her catapult into motherhood. Enjoy the ride as this new mom vows to give up profanity while falling in love with… you guessed it, Costco. Be careful, because if you’re anything like Whitney, you may just pee a little. Motherhood Martyrdom & Costco Runs takes the reader on a roller coaster of emotions as Whitney plummets into postpartum depression, desperately tries to get her kids to stop yodeling in public restrooms, and comes to terms with the fact she’ll never quite be queen of her own kingdom. Get ready to laugh, cry, cheer, and pat yourself on the back for the sake of mommies everywhere. And while you’re at it, stop by Costco for a case of toilet paper and a Very Berry Sundae. You won’t regret it!

    A scientific look at zombies-the ultimate guide to how the other half lives (or not)How fast and far would a zombie infection spread? What would a nutritionist say about an all-brain diet? Why are the undead so pissed off? Here are the answers to all of your essential zombie questions (you know you've asked them), with a lively, science-based exploration of every aspect of the undead.First book to examine the possible science of our undead brethren, from what a zombie brain looks like to why zombies don't get fatFact-based approach-looks at zombies through the lens of real sciencePerfect gift for zombies (assuming they could read) and zombie-philesDripping with great zombie factoids and insights, The Proper Care and Feeding of Zombies will flesh out your understanding of the living dead.

    Why else would you be looking at this book? If you have ever wanted to see behind the front lines of retail, this is the book for you. If you want to validate your own experiences in retail, this is the book for you. If you just want to laugh at humorous things from funny people, this is the book for you. Packed full of true short stories from working in one of these super stores, only one conclusion can be reached in the end: Wal-Mart is the craziest place on Earth!

    He’s also a vampire. He lives alone and avoids the other vampires in L.A., but Pete’s simple life goes haywire when he falls for Angie, the cute bartender at a Sunset Strip dive -- and when sinister vampire lord Carson Fitzgerald returns to claim his children, Pete learns that nothing's ever easy for a creature of the night.

    It’s time for . . . rowdy bands of drunkards roaming the streets, lighting firecrackers, and firing off guns? Gangs of masked youths invading people’s houses, demanding food, drink, and money—and threatening to break the windows (or worse) unless they’re given what they want?Welcome to Christmas, circa 1800. Yes, the season of light, joy, and gift-giving was once regarded as a time of darkness, danger, and dissipation—and celebrated with all-too-public displays of noisemaking, inebriation, and gluttonous overeating. (Well, maybe not everything has changed.) And though we tend to imagine Victorian-era Christmases as sentimental gatherings around the candlelit tree, blazing hearth, and festive punchbowl, the 19th-century evidence tells us quite otherwise.Drawing from his extensive collection of antique postcards, greeting cards, advertising giveaways, and other ephemera, author John Grossman presents a picture of Christmas past that, frankly, looks a lot more like Halloween. Broomstick-riding witches and vampire bat–borne cupids deliver New Year’s greetings. Fur-clad fairies gather ’round a campfire to roast their Christmas dinner—a huge dead rat. And Saint Nicholas? He’s that skinny guy in the bishop robes who arrives with his dark companion, the Devil-like Krampus brandishing switches to punish the badly behaved.With Christmas Curiosities, STC wishes you a very merry, very scary Christmas.

    I loved everything about it.” —Jim Gaffigan We all know how Darth Vader shared his big secret with Luke Skywalker, but what if he had delivered the news in a handwritten note instead? And what if someone found that letter, as well as all of the drafts that landed in the Dark Lord’s trash can? In the riotously funny collection Dear Luke, We Need to Talk. Darth, John Moe finally reveals these lost notes alongside all the imagined letters, e-mails, text messages, and other correspondences your favorite pop culture icons never meant for you to see. From The Walking Dead to The Wizard of Oz, from Billy Joel to Breaking Bad, no reference escapes Moe’s imaginative wit and keen sense of nostalgia. Read Captain James T. Kirk’s lost log entries and Yelp reviews of The Bates Motel and Cheers. Peruse top secret British intelligence files revealing the fates of Agents 001–006, or Don Draper’s cocktail recipe cards. Learn all of Jay-Z’s 99 problems, as well as the complete rules of Fight Club, and then discover an all-points bulletin concerning Bon Jovi, wanted dead or alive—and much more. Like a like a bonus track to a favorite CD or a deleted scene from a cult movie, Dear Luke, We Need to Talk Darth offer a fresh twist on the pop culture classics we thought we knew by heart. You already know part of their story. Now find out the rest.

    The effect of the pill once digested, however, depends upon the viewer. This large, lavishly produced hardcover serves as the catalog for Camille Rose Garcia's first solo museum show outside of Los Angeles. Tragic Kingdom surveys her work with an emphasis on her most recent creations, showcasing paintings, drawings, sketchbooks, prints, and more.

    1 cassette / 90 minutesAn Audio Exclusive! For the first time on audio, Anne Rice, the literary phenomenon of the late 20th century, speaks.In the novel that introduced Anne Rice to the world, Interview with the Vampire, a reporter seeks out the facts behind an extraordinary life.  In the years since that publication, Anne Rice has become one of the world's bestselling authors and has herself been the subject of countless interviews, profiles, and a full-length biography.  Yet who Anne Rice is, and the beliefs, fascinations, desires, fears, and passions that inspire her work, remains an endlessly fascinating topic.Now, for the first time ever in an audio format, Anne Rice discusses -- with her longtime friend, Michael Riley -- everything from her latest novels to her relationship to some of her characters; from the relationship of movies and music to her work to issues about gender, eroticism, religion, personal freedom, adolescent sexuality, and more...

    Another super collection of naughty and not-so-naughty jokes, humorous anecdotes, comic interludes, hilarious situations and bitchy remarks, selected by Khushwant Singh from amongst the thousands contributed by his readers and fans - and some manufactured by him.

    Will your mother-in-law present you with yet another hideous jersey this year? How are you going to cope with Granny's peke or the undesirable in-laws? Has the row about where to spend the holiday already started, and it's only August?Jilly Cooper has the answer to everything. Whether you should seek refuge in the cooking sherry or suggest a wholesome family walk, Jilly offers, in her own irrepressible style, sound but often hilarious advice about how to get through the roller-coaster ride we call Christmas.With the help of the perfect Christmas family - Scarlett O'Aga, the Xmasochistic housewife, her wayward husband Noel, his seductive mistress Ms Stress, their four delightful children Holly, Robin, Carol and Nicholas, and their dog Difficult Patch, we learn how to survive this most demanding of occasions.

    With these characters William will make us laugh and cry. And never again will we think that someone is just a regular bloke - everyone can be a king or a queen in their own suburb.

    The result was a classic column full of Bombecks signature wit and warmth. Now the beloved column that has hung on hundreds of refrigerator doors has been cheerily illustrated and designed as a handsome gift book, Eat Less Cottage and More Ice Cream. In it, Bombeck gently reminds us of what is really important in life: If I had my life to live over again I would have waxed less and listened more.I would have cried and laughed less while watching television . . . and more while watching real life.But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute of it . . . look at it and really see it . . . try it on . . . live it . . . exhaust it . . . and never give that minute back until there was nothing left of it. . . . Long-time fans of Erma Bombeck will be thrilled to have this favorite column in the form of a beautiful keepsake. Readers discovering Bombeck for the first time will become fans instantly. Eat Less Cottage and More Ice Cream offers wisdom to inspire all of us.