Caroline Knapp addresses the following question: How does a woman know, and then honour, what it is she wants in a culture bent on shaping, defining and controlling women and their desires? She uses her own experiences as a powerful exploration of this issue.

    this IS a serious, thoughtful (and thought-provoking) comprehensive introduction to, and examination of, a much misunderstood and misused practice. But more than that, it is a witty, provocative, damn fine read, with as much to offer to the faithfully monogamous as to those looking for a bit more out of life, love and relationships. Go on. Dive in. "Wendy-O tackles a touchy subject with clarity and creativity. She is wise beyond her years. This guide teaches you how you can have it all. I gave the jealousy tips to my lover immediately." [Annie Sprinkle]

    Using her nested model of attachment and trauma, she expands our understanding of how emotional experiences can influence our relationships. Then, she sets out six specific strategies to help you move toward secure attachments in your multiple relationships. Polysecure is both a theoretical treatise and a practical guide.

    In new afterwords, the co-editors reveal how the book came to be and what happened to their lives when, for the first time in history, a lesbian book from a small publisher went mainstream. Each nun in these stories describes her individual and searing path in, or out of, the convent to discover and face the truth of herself. Still myth-shattering, the stories remind us of the courage required to live—and love—in congruence with our authentic selves. "Oblivious to the controversies that surrounded the initial publication of Lesbian Nuns: Breaking Silence, whether they originated within the Catholic Church or the lesbian feminist movement, thousands of readers across the decades have embraced the book and found their lives changed by its message of empowerment." - Joanne E. Passet, Ph.D., Professor of History, Indiana University East

    But her story has had its obstacles, including being her own parent, living in her car as a teenager, and moving to New York City to pursue her dreams. Through it all, she looked to movies, TV, and music as the family and support systems she never had.From spending the holidays alone to having better “stranger luck” than with those closest to her to feeling like the last hopeless romantic on earth, Lane reveals her powerful and entertaining journey in all its candor, anxiety, and ultimate acceptance—with humor always her bolstering force and greatest gift.How to Be Alone is a must-read for anyone whose childhood still feels unresolved, who spends more time pretending to have friends online than feeling close to anyone in real life, who tries to have genuine, deep conversations in a roomful of people who would rather you not. Above all, it’s a book for anyone who desperately wants to feel less alone and a little more connected through reading her words.

    By examining the perilous intersections of identity, categorization, and community, contributors challenge societal mores and countercultural norms. Nobody Passes explores and critiques the various systems of power seen (or not seen) in the act of “passing.” In a pass-fail situation, standards for acceptance may vary, but somebody always gets trampled on. This anthology seeks to eliminate the pressure to pass and thereby unearth the delicious and devastating opportunities for transformation that might create.Mattilda, aka Matt Bernstein Sycamore, has a history of editing anthologies based on brazen nonconformity and gender defiance. Mattilda sets out to ask the question, “What lies are people forced to tell in order to gain acceptance as 'real'.” The answers are as varied as the life experiences of the writers who tackle this urgent and essential topic.

    She argues for the importance of recognizing---and archiving---accounts of trauma that belong as much to the ordinary and everyday as to the domain of catastrophe. Cvetkovich contends that the field of trauma studies, limited by too strict a division between the public and the private, has overlooked the experiences of women and queers. Rejecting the pathologizing understandings of trauma that permeate medical and clinical discourses on the subject, she develops instead a sex-positive approach missing even from most feminist work on trauma. An Archive of Feelings challenges the field to engage more fully with sexual trauma and the wide range of feelings in its vicinity, including those associated with butch-femme sex and AIDS activism and caretaking.An Archive of Feelings brings together oral histories from lesbian activists involved in act/up New York; readings of literature by Dorothy Allison, Leslie Feinberg, Cherrie Moraga, and Shani Mootoo; videos by Jean Carlomusto and Pratibha Parmar; and performances by Lisa Kron, Carmelita Tropicana, and the bands Le Tigre and Tribe 8. Cvetkovich reveals how these cultural formations---activism, performance, and literature---give rise to public cultures that both work through trauma and transform the conditions producing it. By looking closely at connections between sexuality, trauma, and the creation of lesbian public cultures, Cvetkovich makes those experiences that have been pushed to the peripheries of trauma culture the defining principles of a new construction of sexual trauma-one in which trauma catalyzes the creation of cultural archives and political communities.About the Author: Ann Cvetkovich is Associate Professor of English at the University of Texas at Austin. She is the author of Mixed Feelings: Feminism, Mass Culture, and Victorian Sensationalism.

    What one does with this desire is what we call gender." So begins Andrea Long Chu's investigation into gender and desire, females and bodies, radical dreams and philosophical pessimism, and feminism as a form of political suicide. Feminism, Chu argues, is an untenable claim, and "when you make an untenable claim, your desire is showing, like a shy tattoo peeking out from a sleeve." Written in a series of linked theses, this is a provocative and searching text from our most exciting new public intellectual, a self described "sad trans girl in Brooklyn." Chu wears her heart on her sleeve with wit, style, and a manic searching grace.

    Men can no longer get by on good looks and a good line. Women want more. The good news is that you can give it to them!Here is an expert's guide to becoming the kind of lover that every woman dreams of, written by a man who may be the world's most accomplished sexual superstar. Now "M" is sharing the erotic techniques it took him years to learn, in a book that will open undreamed of world of pleasure... to you AND her!A man's first shot in the sexual revolution. Isn't it about time you joined?

    Grunting males have offered little help or guidance for their eager-to-learn companions, instead occupying themselves with chest thumping, sports on cable and other testosterone-driven posturing. It took eons of Darwinian development for women to realize that the answers to their many questions were as close as the nearest telephone. Who better to unveil the mysteries of the he-man psyche that a woman's best friend, the master of clever and refined thinking, the gay man? He knows exactly when, where and how to elicit that ultimate ooh-ooh, because he knows all too well what he wants.Enter Dan Anderson and Maggie Berman, whose biologically determined friendship transcends the battle of the sexes, freeing them to dish and compare notes. Their guide to male pleasure, Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man, is the culmination of their intensive lifelong survey on the subject. Two fearless and dedicated scholars, Dan and Maggie bucked the system, at times even descending into the trenches themselves. Now the wisdom gained from the years of devoted scholarship can finally be divulged to the heterosexual public.Sex Tips contains such highly classified man-pleasers as:The Flying Wallenda PositionThe Upstanding CitizenThe Princeton Belly RubTinglersBackslidersCombo PlattersSo, if you hunger to be the most dazzling lover on the planet, Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man will give you the inside track on how to drive your man to new heights of ecstasy. Double your pleasure, double your fun—and double the new ways he'll find to thank you.What the man in your life won't tell you . . . but wants you to knowHe knows what he wants . . . now you will too!Foolproof First Moves!"Wait a second . . . let me get that thread off your pants" or "Wow, you've been working out. Make a muscle."Tips on Grips! You want to hold a Diet Coke, but you don't want to crush the can and why you should have refrigerated cookie dough on hand the next time the girls come over.Powerful Discoveries! "The Princeton Belly Rub"—what they really teach you in the Ivy League.Magic Techniques! Up, Twist, Over and Down . . . The stroke that'll have more men fighting for you than for Helen of Troy"You'll have the confidence of knowing that you were the best thing in bed he's ever had and, remember, it's the toe-tingler that gets the tennis bracelet."

    For the first time, I have collected all my writing on the subject in one place. The pieces in this zine were written between 2014 and 2019; including my early writing on polyamory as well as my more recent work. This zine moves away from simple (and often judgmental/shaming) frameworks around managing jealousy, and toward a recognition of the distress traumatized and attachment injured people can feel when trying to navigate polyamory. Understanding distress as an embodied, nervous system experience, rather than simply a cognitive one, this collection of writing is trauma and attachment informed. Normalizing and validating distress while exploring the experience of earning secure attachment and developing nervous system regulation, this zine draws on both my personal experience as an anxiously attached polyamorous person living with c-ptsd, and my experience as a facilitator teaching my Trauma Informed Polyamory workshop. It’s a thick zine with fourteen pieces of writing covering topics such as non-hierarchical polyamory, queer platonic love, shame, anxious preoccupied attachment, avoidant attachment, desiring polyamory, and nervous system regulation. With a bright pink risograph cover, this zine celebrates trauma survivors and the hard work and great courage we put into love.

    A deliciously sexy how-to guide, it gives curious straight women the complete inside scoop on girl-on-girl action -- from pickup lines and virgin jitters to threesomes, techniques, and toys. Drawing on personal experience and hundreds of interviews with straight girls who've slept with lesbians, straight girls who've slept with straight girls, lesbians who've slept with straight girls, and straight girls who've done both or neither, Sincero covers the A to Z of the experience including: · Obtaining a visitor's pass to the girls-only club · The super-huge importance of sticking your hand down your pants · The straight girl's starter kit -- from nail clippers to cocktails to get her in the mood · "Gettin' Some 101" -- positions, techniques, and instructional photos · "And Boy Makes Three!" -- how to have a threesome that's fun for all · Suggestions for further viewing and reading and much, much more Packed with expertly toned advice that is at once laugh-out-loud hilarious and fundamentally practical, The Straight Girl's Guide to Sleeping with Chicks is ideal for any woman looking to spice things up with a boyfriend, break the ice with a best friend, or simply add a few just-in-case items to her sexual menu.

    Drawing from her years of experience as a researcher and a psychotherapist, Leslie C. Bell takes us directly into the lives of young women who struggle to negotiate the complexities of sexual desire and pleasure, and to make sense of their historically unique but contradictory constellation of opportunities and challenges. In candid interviews, Bell’s subjects reveal that, despite having more choices than ever, they face great uncertainty about desire, sexuality, and relationships. Ground-breaking and highly readable, Hard to Get offers fascinating insights into the many ways that sex, love, and satisfying relationships prove surprisingly elusive to these young women as they navigate the new emotional landscape of the 21st century.

    While most books on the topic broach sexuality only to reassure women that it is all right to say “no” to unwanted sex, Healing Sex encourages women to learn how to say “yes” — to their own desires and on their own terms. This mind-body approach to healing from sexual trauma was created by Staci Haines, who has been educating in the area of sexual abuse, sex education, and somatic healing for over 15 years. Her techniques are ideal for anyone looking for a new way to heal from trauma, beyond traditional talk therapy.

    The book pays special attention to differences of race, class, age and physical ability, and addresses the issues raised when one or both partners are recovering from alcohol, substance, or sexual abuse. The book also addresses differences that lesbians may encounter in their relationships regarding such issues as butch-femme, transgender identity, bisexuality, monogamy, and s/m. Thoroughly readable and extremely helpful, with an updated resource guide, Lesbian Couples is a book that every lesbian will want to own.