It's not a particularly divine mission and God probably wouldn't approve. It depends on his views on double-crossing philandering scoundrels.

    

    At the perpetual age of 650, this is really no longer an option. The Full Moon Event Paulie Vergen is a Vampire living the daily grind of life until a fateful day when a newly infected Werewolf landed on his doorstep. All Paulie wanted was peace and quiet, but life didn't often seem to care about his plans. He's now faced with helping the poor Werewolf navigate through the Underworld in order to find the help that he needs. Bob the Zombie Bob is a Zombie who was just going about his business when a band of thieves stole his hand so that they could make a batch of Elfagra in the Upperworld. While it's bad enough that they've stolen Bob's hand for such a purpose, it comes to the Zombie's attention that if the bad guys use the wrong technique it could cause a cosmic rift that will spell the real death of Bob...not just the long, drawn out one that's part of being a Zombie. Gappy's Gadgets Gappy Whirligig is an industrious Gnome who has yet to reach the Age of Tinkering. In a flash, Gappy's life flips upside down, leaving him to make the decision to either strike out on his own or become a 42-year-old foster child. Gappy demonstrates his industrious spirit as he leaves Hubintegler's rules and regulations behind and instead seeks to make his mark in the seedy town of Planoontik.These stories get their influence from Terry Pratchett's Discworld, Robert Asprin's Myth Adventures, Monty Python, and countless other comedic mediums. This omnibus edition includes the first four books in the Tales from the Land of Ononokin series. You'll get wizards, vampires, werewolves, dwarves, elves, gnomes, orcs, ogres, giants, gorgans, humans, trolls, zombies, and more ... and it's all set in a fantastical world that will keep you giggling for weeks.

    Bibi, the first male in twelve generations of Browns not to have taken his own life, has a furious crush on a beautiful nine-fingered woman and an unbearable urge to understand the meaning of Time, the Universe, and America. So Bibi begins his quest--careening through a world of bizarre cults, gravity-defying crones, and lunatics of every stripe--all for a chance to meet his long-lost uncle Otto, a legendary junk-dealer who lives on the Hope Valley Hubcap Ranch. Because in a world that is spinning a little too fast, and a little too wildly, Bibi’s destiny is to find the essence of hope, the beauty of hubcaps, and the meaning of life in the Valley of the Hubcap King....With a touch of Candide, a dash of Don Quixote, and healthy dose of Zen, Sean Murphy’s wondrous, riotous novel is the story of an ordinary man searching through a hilariously off-kilter world--for the truths that might just save us all.From the Paperback edition.

    And we love to fall in love. As children we pour our love into our pets and our friends. As teenagers we fall in love with musicians and actors and the boy whose locker is next to ours. As we mature, we long for romantic love that will last a lifetime. Sacrificial love, unexplainable love, familial love, desperate love. Love songs and love stories. Clearly we were created with the longing for love ingrained in our souls.With lots of wit and a bit of wisdom drawn from a lifetime of falling in love, Lincee Ray invites you to an unabashed celebration of that loving feeling. As she reveals the loves of her life and encourages you to recall your own, you'll discover alongside her that there is only one who can ever truly fulfill the deepest longings of our hearts. And he made us to be part of a divine love story.

    * A beautifully designed resource chronicling one of gaming's most massive, dynamic universes! * MMORPG.com's Game of the Year 2009–2011! * 2014 marks the entry of EVE Online into its second decade!

    It's a simple plan - he's a simple man - except for the forces of the Random, a man called Joseph Kaye, and a cockroach that doesn't exist. Sci-fi comedy.

    “Eggman” Robotnik and the rest of the cast of the comics and SEGA games in this first-of-its-kind Best of Sonic the Hedgehog graphic novel collection! After nearly twenty years of comics, specials and mini-series, Sonic the Hedgehog has hundreds of great stories to his name. Through the laughs and thrills, the action and adventure, the highs and lows, some stories stand out among the rest. Join us as the Archie Comics Sonic Team picks their favorite stories from the history of the series and presents them in this thematic must-have collection! Included in this collection are "Mecha Madness" (featured in Sonic Archives 10 and Sonic Select 2), chosen by writer Ian Flynn; the finale to "Endgame" (featured in Sonic Archives 13), chosen by artist Patrick Spaziante; "Order from Chaos" (from Sonic the Hedgehog issues 168-169) chosen by artist Tracy Yardley!; and "Future Tense" (from Sonic the Hedgehog issue 215), chosen by artist Jamal Peppers. Don't miss out on this collection of the best Sonic stories to date, chosen by the most popular Sonic creators!

    Other than that things are just peachy.Someone has stolen the Grim Reaper's head and Blunt has been told to find it. In a new city where the rules of the living don't apply Blunt's up to his neck in the brown stuff and he's never been much of a swimmer. With the aid of a woman who keeps turning involuntarily invisible, a journalist who hasn't written an article since she died, and a bureaucrat who can't say no to anyone, Blunt's got to stop whoever is stealing the heads of the city's elite.As he begins his investigations he finds things aren't all they seem. Who are the Gloomwood Youth Order? What do you call the murder of someone already dead? Why are people having their heads chopped off? And what is in the hot dogs? With time slipping away he needs to learn what makes the city tick before there's no city left.

    When he returns home from his demanding job, a man rightfully deserves a bit of pampering. A happy smile, a warm kiss, and a pair of cozy slippers are just the start. Here are all the secrets for helping him feel comfortable and content:  - Advice on cooking from scratch - The lowdown on why a clean home makes hubby feel better - Valuable hints on making yourself more attractive to him The Good Wife is a great and humorous gift for brides-to-be or happily married wives, for Valentine’s Day, and bridal showers and bachelorette parties.

    What’s the man to do? Leave the bathroom and say nothing on the matter? Or, take matters into his own hands?THE MEANTIME STORIES is a funny short read series that draws inspiration from Terry Pratchett, Monty Python, and Douglas Adams, all combined with a twist of Nordic Noir (human folly, abrupt and plentiful deaths, snappy dialogue, quirky deep thoughts, and absurd outcomes). It’s glittering darkness, and clouded light.Each story is a stand-alone, ready to be enjoyed when you yearn for 30 minutes of wacky, brainy, and laugh-out-loud entertainment. Longing for surprises, unexpected twists, and silliness with an edge? Look no further, because in the Meantime, anything can happen!

    No agonizing choices between light reading and the serious stuff. This 4-ply reader has it all: entertainment, humor, education, trivia, science, history, pop culture . and more! Of course, it's even divided by length - you can spend a minute with the Quickies, relax with Normal Length articles, or really get comfortable with long Items.With Uncle John's 4-Ply Bathroom Reader strategically placed in your home, you'll settle in happily and read about:The Origins of Common Words and PhrasesThe 7 Wonders of the Ancient WorldThe Real Difference Between Burger King and McDonald'sElvis's Letter to Richard NixonThe Curse of King TutWhat's in a TwinkieBizarre Lawsuits . and a whole lot more.

    On Saturday, March 8, at 7:12 p.m., Trey Hamburger heard a second hand account of a teleporting Hot Pocket and started wiggin' out bad. So he and his amigo Mike Stevens basically went into combat mode and ended up encountering some of the most seriously messed-up shit ever. And they're STILL FREAKED OUT ABOUT IT. Now, even though these guys aren't SCIENTISTS, it's pretty for sure that they might have extrapolated something HUGE, which will have the intellectual community going nuts for weeks.This is their story.Ghost/Aliens is probably the first time ever a regular person has investigated this sort of thing. So now the people of planet Earth will finally know the truth about all those levitating towels and dead grandpas popping up all over the place.

    I am Brandon Thighmaster. Monk. Hero. Inspiration. I enjoy crunching, squats, looking at myself, looking at other people looking at myself, and long walks on the beach. I also do adventures and stuff, and I guess you can read about them here. But enough about you, let's talk about me. Brandon Thighmaster."

    Dozens of warmongering ogres. Hundreds of dynamite-wielding gnomes. And one normal guy in the middle of it all. Bad mornings. We've all had 'em. But what if you woke up in a post-apocalyptic land filled with wizards, dragons, and ogres? Not only that, but you woke up as a prisoner of a clan of mages who don’t even speak your language? What if these guys expected you to know magic, but left you to figure out for yourself how to cast it? These are the problems Isaac must solve. And what's he going to do when death knocks on his door? He's going to blast a fireball through the letterbox and send death running. But first...he just needs to learn how to even cast a fireball. Follow his journey through a land filled with creatures that want to kill him, and watch as he refuses to let them. Accompany him into a land of mystery and danger, where life is tough and learning spells and skills takes work. A land where Isaac is determined to stop being the prey and become the predator. This is his journey to make allies and friends in this new world. A journey through battles against slaver ogres and wingless dragons and gnome dictators. Through experimentation and adaptation, where he learns that killing one enemy helps him against the next. It’s also his journey to find a warm, comfy bed. This is the tale of a someone who used to be a normal guy. It's Isaac’s tale of adapting to a world where everything is worth killing. Over 500 pages of fast-moving fantasy, set in a brutal apocalyptic world. This is a mesmerizing story about one guy's quest for power and survival, with light litrpg/game-like elements and a focus on him learning how to use magic. 'Amazing - I love it because of how original it is. This is a hidden gem. The story is good and I'm enjoying the style.' - Early Reviewer 'A breath of fresh air. Isaac is not some over-powered or genius guy. He is just a dude trying to survive in the cruel world he was thrown in, and he is trying to make head and tail of what is going on.' - Early reviewer 'Enjoyable - I especially like the rationality of the main character and how he approaches problems. Unique, definitely worth reading.' - Early reviewer.