Yeah. It’s weird. When October Jones figured out he could send text messages to himself on his mobile phone, he naturally decided that the best use of this discovery was to send passive-aggressive messages to himself under the guise of his bulldog. And so the exasperating, slightly delusional, and utterly endearing Dog and his alter-ego BatDog were born.Texts from Dog features Dog’s attempts to keep the neighborhood safe from the likes of Mr. Postman and his arch-nemesis Cat-Cat—he has managed to only smash three TVs and a patio door in the process. And in between crime fighting sprees and run-ins with the squirrel mafia, there are romantic interludes with pillows, fetch sessions gone terribly awry, and the abusive banter only a bromance between man and his text-savvy dog can spawn.For those of us who have ever had a conversation with a pet in our heads, Texts from Dog will make you laugh out loud and perhaps even make you think twice about leaving your pet home alone for the day.

    I did not mean for that to rhyme” —Adam Mansbach, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Go the F*ck to SleepIn 2010, seven women met in Brooklyn, New York, to form a Mommy Group. Over coffee, croissants, wine, and the occasional baby carrot, they commiserated about typical new-mother issues: difficult births, babies who slept in ten-minute increments, and breast pumps that talked back in the middle of the night. And then things got complicated. Elizabeth and Melissa suffered from postpartum depression and anxiety. Jane’s daughter was diagnosed with developmental delays. Anna’s husband left her when their baby was two weeks old. Through it all, the Mommy Group laughed, supported, and learned lessons from one another that the myriad “experts” hadn’t delivered. The journalist of the bunch—author Elizabeth Isadora Gold—reached out to other Mommy Groups around the country and found that similar bonds were forming far beyond brownstone Brooklyn. In fact, mothers across all class, geographic, and racial boundaries appear to be searching for the same thing: a way to be strong, loving, engaged parents “while retaining—or remaking—our Selves.” A witty, relatable, and honest look at the realities of parenthood today, The Mommy Group is a companion that will help any mom feel understood and empowered, and keep her laughing all the way.

    Most people think it’s Frisbee football played barefoot and without boundaries. Those people are wrong. Ultimate is a sport played by 824,000 people a year in North America—more than korfball, lawn darts, lacrosse, and curling combined. Ultimate is so popular that it even has rules that are sometimes followed.This book will provide you with complete and total knowledge of the Ultimate game.THIS BOOK INCLUDES:-- The Eight Ultimate Player Types-- The 42 Most Common Nicknames-- 28 Near-Useless Throws on the Field-- How to Name Your Ultimate Team-- Where to Play Ultimate Without Being Mocked-- How to Score at an Ultimate Party-- Useful Playing Tips from Experts of the Game PLUS: HOW TO PLAY ULTIMATE IN EIGHT EASY STEPS – AN ILLUSTRATED GUIDE -- Can I play Ultimate with a mustache?-- Where do Ultimate babies come from?-- How can I become an Ultimate champion without practicing?-- What is “throwing Fire”?-- How can I survive a shark attack?  About the author:Pasquale Anthony Leonardo IV has covered numerous championship Ultimate tournaments since 1997 and was the Media Director for the 2006 World Junior Ultimate Championships. In 2005 he co-wrote Ultimate: The First Four Decades, which was reviewed in Sports Illustrated and featured on ESPN’s live talk show "Cold Pizza." He also writes screenplays. He lives in Brooklyn, New York and/or somewhere out West.

    Nor is it always easy to raise, care for, guide and teach a highly sensitive child. Because the highly sensitive child experiences the world a little differently, and that can be difficult to understand. This book aims to help you experience the world from the child’s perspective, so that you can better understand them and help them to grow and thrive. In this simple, concise guide I distil the reams of information available on the highly sensitive child so that you can get the knowledge you need quickly and easily. Philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche wrote: ‘And those who were seen dancing were thought to be crazy by those who could not hear the music.’ The highly sensitive child isn’t crazy. Nor are they slow, or weak, or just ‘not tough enough’. They simply dance to a tune that not everyone can hear. This book helps you hear the music to which the highly sensitive child dances. Once you know the tune exists, and you listen for it carefully, you’ll find it’s beautiful, moving, powerful music.This is what Elaine N. Aron, Ph.D. thought of the book. Elaine is the author of the worldwide bestsellers The Highly Sensitive Person and The Highly Sensitive Child she has pioneered the research into Highly Sensitive People.“As the author of this truly brilliant little book, Jamie Williamson explains that he is not an academic or a psychologist. I am simply a man who feels very passionately about the subject. He is highly sensitive and so is one of his daughters, and he writes about sensitivity with both simplicity and depth. His sensitivity also shows in his book’s briefness. Caregivers of children need an author to get to the point so they can go get groceries, pick up the kids etc. Jamie’s book can be read in an hour, yet it has charming examples as well as great suggestions and a full, scientifically accurate description of the trait. Jamie is reaching out to all parents, carers and teachers of sensitive children and whether through this book or on his website, he is a wonderful resource.” – Elaine N. Aron.

    That's what she provides readers with in this humorous, insightful book on life after 40. With such chapters as "When Your Blood's Too Tired to Bleed" and "Roughage by Candlelight", readers will love it.

    Why else would you be looking at this book? If you have ever wanted to see behind the front lines of retail, this is the book for you. If you want to validate your own experiences in retail, this is the book for you. If you just want to laugh at humorous things from funny people, this is the book for you. Packed full of true short stories from working in one of these super stores, only one conclusion can be reached in the end: Wal-Mart is the craziest place on Earth!

    Following the success of her New York Times bestselling debut, everyone's favorite disgruntled feline is back with this demotivational guide to everyday life, love, friendship, and more. Featuring many new photos of Grumpy Cat's famous frown and packed with uninspiring observations, The Grumpy Guide to Life will help anyone get in touch with their inner grouch.

    THE AUDACITY OF HYPE brings together his views on diverse subjects, ranging from wickedly funny pen portraits of the sometimes loveable, usually despicable chumps who like to think of themselves as our political elite, and their bonkers schemes to save the world that are in fact likely to do us more harm than a pile of witches, to WMD, disaster movies, the pitfalls of 'I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here' and the high and mighty rhetoric of Obama, this is an absurdly entertaining and utterly indispensable collection from one of Britain's most brilliant satirists.

    Like a wise and witty friend, Kerry leads you through the rough spots of life by poking gentle fun in such a vivacious way that you’ll be smiling at your own foibles. You’ll laugh out loud—and be moved to tears—as you discover some of life’s greatest truths hidden within these simple pages. Reclaim your sanity and enrich your soul with this humorous and poignant anthology that celebrates the joy of being alive and shows how greatly each of us is blessed."

    Crackling with caustic wit and insight, no aspect of American life is safe from Jimmy's hilarious scrutiny. He gets to the heart of the issues: why Republicans should support gay marriage or why the President shouldn't have Secret Security until the country has gun control, bringing clarity and hilarity to the incoherent noise of our punditocracy. This outrageously entertaining manifesto is an excellent resource for those who have survived long arguments during family dinners. And in a media environment dominated by corporate interests, Jimmy's take-no-prisoners approach is fearless: going after both political parties, and all corners of mainstream news. A David against an army of Goliaths. Equal measures of silliness and spleen-venting, Your Country IsJust Not That Into You is the most oddly uplifting political book ofthe year.

    And the adventure has only begun! In her first humor-packed guide to raising twins, Elizabeth Lyons and her "multiples" sorority offer the wisdom of their combined experience in the form of practical shortcuts, real-world strategies, and sage advice. Topics include: - Preparing the Lair: Mandatory Gear for Babies AND Mom - Twinproofing Your Marriage - Breastfeeding Strategies (and Why It's Okay if You Don't) - Unsolicited Advice: Stories from the Trenches - Getting Twins on a Schedule--Preferably the Same One Lyons balances the day-to-day challenges of raising twins--from double feedings to sleep deprivation to getting out while pretending everything's under control--with a sanity-saving dose of camaraderie. By the end, you'll be smiling and shouting, "Thank heaven, I'm not alone!"

    In Reasons My Kid is Crying, Greg collects together photos sent from parents around the world, documenting the many, completely logical reasons why small children cry.  Among them: “I let him play on the grass” . . . “He ran out of toys to throw into his pool” . . . “The neighbor’s dog isn’t outside”.  The result is both an affectionate portrait of the universal, baffling logic of toddlers—and a reminder for burned-out parents everywhere that they are not alone.

    30,000 first printing."

    But sometimes, it just sucks. I know. I'm Amber Dusick and I started my blog Parenting: Illustrated with Crappy Pictures because I needed a place to vent about the funny (and frustrating) day-to-day things that happened to me as a parent. Turns out, poop is hilarious! At least when you're not the one wiping it up.This book won't make your frustrating moments any less crappy. But these stories about my Crappy Baby, Crappy Boy and my husband, Crappy Papa, will hopefully make you laugh. Because you're not alone. And sometimes the crappiest moments make the best memories. Parenting is wonderful! And also, well, you know.

    It became a film in 1960 starring David Niven and Doris Day, and a television series in 1965. Now you can hear why many consider Jean Kerr to be one of America's funniest writers. In this unique collection of essays, Kerr captures the perils of motherhood, wifehood, selfhood, and other assorted challenges. Listen and learn "How to Decorate in One Easy Breakdown" and how to drop those unwanted pounds with "Aunt Jean's Marshmallow Fudge Diet." Please Don't Eat the Daisies strikes modern listeners as particularly funny because these feminist issues are still relevant today.