In reality, mythology is more screwed up than a schizophrenic shaman doing hits of unidentified. Wait, it all makes sense now. In Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, Cory O’Brien, creator of Myths RETOLD!, sets the stories straight. These are rude, crude, totally sacred texts told the way they were meant to be told: loudly, and with lots of four-letter words. Skeptical? Here are just a few gems to consider: � Zeus once stuffed an unborn fetus inside his thigh to save its life after he exploded its mother by being too good in bed. � The entire Egyptian universe was saved because Sekhmet just got too hammered to keep murdering everyone. � The Hindu universe is run by a married couple who only stop murdering in order to throw sweet dance parties…on the corpses of their enemies. � The Norse goddess Freyja once consented to a four-dwarf gangbang in exchange for one shiny necklace. And there’s more dysfunctional goodness where that came from.

    Awful information about phabulous Pharoahs, mean mummies, revolting recipes for 3000 year old sweets, and more. History has never been so horrible! For 9-12 year olds.

    Baxter highlights hidden treasures along theSeine, treasured markets at Place d’Aligre, the favorite ambles of Ernest Hemingway, Gertrude Stein, and Sylvia Beach, and more, in a series of intimate vignettes that evoke the best parts of Paris’s many charms. Baxter’s unforgettable chronicle reveals how walking is the best way to experience romance, history, and pleasures off the beaten path . . . not only of La Ville-Lumière but also, perhaps, of life itself.

    The myths and legends of the ancient worlds, from Greece, Rome and Egypt to the Norse and Celtic lands, through Persia and India to China and the Far East, the Ultimate Encyclopedia of Mythology is a comprehensive A to Z of the classic stories of gods and goddesses, heroes and mythical beasts, wizards and warriors.

    This new edition has been revised to reflect today's game, giving football fans up-to-the-minute information on all the rules and regulations, positions, plays, and penalties. Featuring coverage of the newest stadium technologies, revised greatest players and legends, and pro-football must-do experiences, it also includes expert advice on training and gearing up for those who play the game. Fans will discover the best ways to enjoy football-at home or at the stadium.

    Features clear explanations of the distinctions between synonyms, includes example phrases and antonyms for most entries. 448 pages. 4 3/16quot; x 6 3/4quot;.

    In the decades since his death in September 1973, millions have read THE HOBBIT, THE LORD OF THE RINGS, and THE SILMARILLION and become fascinated about the very private man behind the books. Born in South Africa in January 1892, John Ronald Reuel Tolkien was orphaned in childhood and brought up in near-poverty. He served in the first World War, surviving the Battle of the Somme, where he lost many of the closest friends he'd ever had. After the war he returned to the academic life, achieving high repute as a scholar and university teacher, eventually becoming Merton Professor of English at Oxford where he was a close friend of C.S. Lewis and the other writers known as The Inklings.Then suddenly his life changed dramatically. One day while grading essay papers he found himself writing 'In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit' -- and worldwide renown awaited him. Humphrey Carpenter was given unrestricted access to all Tolkien's papers, and interviewed his friends and family. From these sources he follows the long and painful process of creation that produced THE LORD OF THE RINGS and THE SILMARILLION and offers a wealth of information about the life and work of the twentieth century's most cherished author.

    Simpson. Get the hard–knocks facts of life from the guy who's seen it all, heard it all, done it all and denies it all.(The "J" stands for "jenius"...)

    That's why a guide to the world of uglies has been requisitioned from the hole in the wall. Inside you'll find: A rundown on all the cliques, from Crims and Cutters to tech-heads and surge-monkeys The complete history, starting with the destruction of the oil bug to the launch of Extras in space How all those awesome gadgets came to be: hoverboards, eyescreens, skintennas, sneak suits... PLUS an exclusive look at Scott Westerfeld's first draft of Extras -- starring Hiro, not Aya. And so much more, it's mind-wrecking.

    And you’re definitely not alone. There’s Jimmy Carter, forgetting the nuclear launch codes in a suit at the dry cleaners. Rod Stewart fumbling for the name of the intense first love who inspired “Maggie Mae.” G. K. Chesterton writing a long letter to hismother announcing the good news about his engagement—while his mother is in the room with him. Marilyn Monroe blowing the same line through 52 takes during the filming of Some Like It Hot.Celebrating history’s greatest mental lapses, is a perfect impulse book in the fine gift format of Famous Last Words. Not just outlandishly funny, it’s also a book of great comfort—after all, having a senior moment puts you in the company of Einstein, Lincoln, Beethoven, Newton, Toscanini, and a whole assortment of presidents, poets, philosophers, popes, and Nobel Prize–winners. Talk about gaffes. Here are best men forgetting to show up at the wedding. Judges staggered by the incompetence of their previous decisions. Senators frozen in front of TV cameras. Olympic officials gazing absently while bewildered runners continue through the finish line. Bono losing the only copy of his lyrics to a new album. Forget to pick up your copy today!

    This biography recounts the life of Harry Houdini from his boyhood through his years as an escape artist and master showman.

    Taking as territory everything from the Big Bang to the rise of civilization, Bryson seeks to understand how we got from there being nothing at all to there being us. To that end, he has attached himself to a host of the world’s most advanced (and often obsessed) archaeologists, anthropologists, and mathematicians, travelling to their offices, laboratories, and field camps. He has read (or tried to read) their books, pestered them with questions, apprenticed himself to their powerful minds. A Short History of Nearly Everything is the record of this quest, and it is a sometimes profound, sometimes funny, and always supremely clear and entertaining adventure in the realms of human knowledge, as only Bill Bryson can render it. Science has never been more involving or entertaining.

    In this first volume of a series on the intricacies of military command, Clancy traces the organizational success story of the U.S. Army's rise from the slough of Vietnam to the heights of victory in the Persian Gulf. In 1972, the Army lacked proper discipline, training, weapons, and doctrine; all these would be overhauled in the next 15 years. For those readers keen on such nuts and bolts, the book will be fascinating. But the book truly sparkles when Franks tells his story. A "tanker" who lost a foot in the invasion of Cambodia, he is a man of great courage, thoughtfulness, and integrity. One cannot help but wince when a civilian tells him, "You and those boys did that for nothing." And for all the acronyms and military history, that is what this book is about: healing the wounds Vietnam inflicted. "But this time [the Gulf War], it was going to end differently. They all would see to that."In his brilliant, bestselling novels, Tom Clancy has explored the most dramatic military and security issues of our time. Now he takes readers deep into the operational art of war with this insightful look at one of America's most important military engagements in recent years: the Gulf War. Never before has the art of maneuver warfare been explored so incisively and in such rich, provocative detail. Clancy and General Frederick M. Franks, Jr.-commander of the main force that broke the back of the Republican Guard-take us deep inside the war councils and command posts and up to the front lines. They give us a war that few people really knew-and that television never showed.

    The Letters of J.R.R Tolkien sheds much light on Tolkien's creative genius and grand design for the creation of a whole new world: Middle-earth. Featuring a radically expanded index, this volume provides a valuable research tool for all fans wishing to trace the evolution of THE HOBBIT and THE LORD OF THE RINGS.

    They have sent coded messages, worn clever disguises and used inventive hideaways. The information they've gathered has helped win battles and changed the course of war.This book features ten stories, from the American Revolution to the Korean War, about the thrilling and dangerous adventures of real-life teenagers who left their mark in the shadowy world of espionage. These young spies chose to live a lie and risk everything—including his or her life—for the good of their country.(From Allan Zullo's website)