K. Rowling but actually is fanfiction written by two writers she found on Craigslist London, featuring a return to the Triwizard Tournament as depicted in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. In this new parody, meant for both children and adults, we finally get the sequel to the epic series: Will Elbows and Scorpio succeed in changing the past? When Scorpio accidentally ends up in an alternate reality where the Dark Lord won, and he's the coolest kid in school, will he go back again to undo what they undid? Or will he stick around, go on a date with Holly Chapstick . . . and decide this new reality is actually pretty dope?

    Included are striking images of tattoos ranging from all-over “body suits” to individual motifs.

    If you or someone you know is discontented, distressed, or downright disturbed, maybe the Great White North is right for you, eh. But how much do you really know about Canada? Can you do a job that Canada needs (do you play hockey, drill for oil, or make poutine?)? Can you identify the best Canadian province for your lifestyle (lots of tundra or just some tundra?)? Can you master the proper pronunciation of "sorry"? What strange wizardry is the Canadian government? Is maple syrup acceptable substitution for currency? At long last, How to Move to Canada can help make your vague threat into a cold Canadian reality. This book is also full of activities such as: Color the flag of your new homeland Match the strange Canuck dialect with their local definitions And more! PLEASE NOTE: This is a humor book. It won't really help you emigrate. Rather, it's a subversive mix of real information on the Great White North plus a hilarious look at all the reasons why you won't like it there any better — and why they probably won't have you anyway.

    Whatever the case may be, Jason believes it's all about getting off your ass and maximizing the opportunities that life has to offer. It's about remembering that you are alive, right now, and that won't always be the case. So do something. Anything. Enjoy the ride. go outside and get naked.Jason can tell you how to handle every situation life throws at you and play it like a champ: how to look, how to act, how to pick up a stripper--you name it.But that's just for starters. Jason believes that to get what you really want out of life, you have to have confidence. And true confidence is something you have to earn, by deciding what you want from life and then pursuing you passion until you make your dreams a reality.This book will show you how to develop the positive attitude that will allow you to truly make things happen.

    Yes, wehave the same instincts and the same sexual desires but our personal preferencesare as different as grains of sand in the desert. (That’s why the saying goes thatpeople are as unique as snowflakes)All women don’t like the same food, they don’t like the same clothes… They don’teven like the same COLOR. So how can all women be interested in the same thingfrom a man? Think about it Some women like funny men. Some women like cockymen. Other women like gothic men, jocky men or men of a certain race, age orfinancial status.So approaching women with the same techniques for starting conversation, or eventhe same techniques when it comes to the bedroom is a losing bet… But it’s been ourbest guess to date! It’s like playing the roulette wheel at the casino, and only placingyour chips on either red or black.Yeah, you’ll win 50% of the time, and maybe you’ll get her a little attracted to you…But it’s better than playing the numbers in the middle where your chances of successare slim and you’re likely to lose your shirt. It’s not the best way to play the game,however, it’s the SAFEST way. With the skills you have know, it’s the EASIEST way to win.What if there was a BETTER way?What if you could confidently bet all of your chips on a number in the middle? You’d winevery time and you’d make a KILLING in profits. It’s the same way with women: Whenyou know exactly what she likes; the deepest, darkest thoughts she thinks; and whenyou know what she secretly CRAVES from men, you can match her dating and sexualneeds perfectly.You’ll be the guy she’s been looking for. You’ll appear like a mind reader. You’ll seem likeyou know her better than she knows herself. Even if you just met her a few minutes ago.Until now, you couldn’t get this information about her unless you stole her diary and read it.But recent insights into Female Psychology have cracked her mind right open, and you canpeek into the Pandora’s Box to see her secret thoughts and read the contents. For example:Did you know that there are two ways women like to be approached? 50% of women respondwell to a compliment while the other 50% of women wouldn’t DREAM of falling for a line like that.If the beautiful woman you just met likes the compliment you gave her, she’ll start to connectwith you and find her attractive.If she doesn’t vibe with your line You’re dead where you stand. You won’t get another chanceto win her heart, and she’ll go back to whatever she was doing.You can have THAT GIRL! You can save that conversation! With the new Pandora’s Box TechniquesVin DiCarlo discovered, you’ll know whether she’s a compliment girl or not before you everapproach her.

    Each book in this series is focused on one important story and lesson from the Bible. Timeless poetry and colorful illustrations make these books a favorite for both children and parents.You can read these books to your children. They can read them to you. They can read them on their own. You can read them together.In the carBefore bedIn a Sunday school classroomAt homeIn a church libraryAnywhereAny timeThrough it all, you and your precious children will be hiding God’s word in your hearts.

    SpongeBob and Patrick are on the ultimate road trip when they set out in the Krusty Krab Patty Wagon to save King Neptune's crown from Shell City! They will travel through a cavernous trench and meet a monstrous frogfish, see a stampede of sea horses, and meet a giant Cyclops!

    But their lives are about to collide in the most delicious way possible, as they hurry to a conference on a snowy December evening. Oops, watch out for that reindeer! Another cosy and highly festive quick-read romcom from popular writer, Beth Good. Pop the kettle on, grab yourself a gingerbread man, and start reading ...

    SUMMER ON BLOSSOM STREET Knitting and life are both about beginnings—and endings. That's why Lydia Goetz, owner of A Good Yarn on Seattle's Blossom Street, offers a class called Knit to Quit. It's for people who want to quit something—or someone!—and start a new phase of their lives. But when your life—and your stitches—get snarled, your friends can always help! HANNAH'S LIST On the anniversary of his beloved wife's death, Dr. Michael Everett receives a letter Hannah wrote him. In it she reminds him of her love and makes one final request. An impossible request. I want you to marry again. She tells him he shouldn't spend the years he has left grieving—and she's chosen three women she asks him to consider. During the months that follow, he spends time with these three women, learning more about each of them…and about himself. Learning what Hannah already knew. He's a man who needs the completeness only love can offer. And Hannah's list leads him to the woman who can help him find it. A TURN IN THE ROAD In the middle of the year, in the middle of her life, Bethanne Hamlin takes a road trip with her daughter, Annie, and her former mother-in-law, Ruth. So, there they are, three women driving across America. They have their maps and their directions—but even the best-planned journey can take you to a turn in the road. Or lead to an unexpected encounter, like the day Bethanne meets a man named Max…

    And since you're being compared to a rat in this book, the whole "Maze" analogy works like a charm.When you come to see the "Psycho-babble on the Wall," you can discover for yourself how to deal with change in the workplace, and how to find the Cheese that will make your life joyous and fulfilling.Failing that, if you were forced by your boss to read "Who Moved My Cheese?" before getting a pay cut or a pink slip, "Who Cut The Cheese?" will at least give you the last laugh!NOTE: "Who Cut the Cheese?" is a small gem - meaning that it's roughly 1400 pages shorter than "War and Peace," but roughly the same length as the teeny tiny original book (around 80 pages). That's why the price is low, but the "laughs per page" ratio is high!

    Alfie doesn't want a bath. He just wants to play.Read along as Alfie turns this nightly chore into a fun, imaginary adventure. From safari hunts to slaying dragons, bath time will never be the same.This is the perfect book to read before bed or bath!

    In other words, perfect." - The Huffington PostAn amusing and captivating tale that's a delightful primer for laughing at the inevitable: If you're a dinosaur, all of your friends are dead. If you're a pirate, all of your friends have scurvy. If you're a tree, all of your friends are end tables. Each page of this laugh-out-loud, illustrated humor book showcases the downside of being everything from a clown to a cassette tape to a zombie. Cute and dark all at once, this hilarious children's book for adults teaches valuable lessons about life.From the sock whose only friends have gone missing to the houseplant whose friends are being slowly killed by irresponsible plant owners (like you), All My Friends Are Dead presents hilariously entertaining stories about life and existential predicaments.The simple yet effective imagery, the personification of inanimate objects, and short, hilarious quips come together to create an amusing adventure through each character's unique grievance and wide-eyed dilemmas.Written by Avery Monsen, an actor, artist, and writer and Jory John, a writer, editor, and journalist. They are friends, and neither is dead. Yet.All My Friends Are Dead is both the saddest funny book and the funniest sad book you'll ever read.Children's book written for adults Displayed in an accessible cartoon form

    The struggle is real. Anyone who is a cat lover knows that the cat rules the roost, and that certainly doesn’t change at bedtime. You might be ready to sleep, but you can bet that kitty is ready for just about anything but some shut-eye. Release your frustrations with a good laugh as you read along with Rosa and her struggle to get her cat to Stop Meowing and Go the F*ck to Sleep! Stop Meowing and Go the F*ck to Sleep is a funny bedtime book for all the desperate cat parents out there. If you have experienced the nightmare of having a kitty who won’t let you have a good night’s sleep, this is the book for you. It’s the perfect gift for crazy cat lovers who appreciate hilarious insights into the feline nature.

    And that when attempting art, a mess can turn into a masterpiece too! Join this little girl and her unicorn on a fun painting journey that turns out to be quite magical!

    When Teddie Arizona, woman of mystery, crawls out of the wreckage of her plane and into their lives with a $5,000,000 secret, things start to get interesting.When T.A.’s “husband,” F. Rank Pantaker, dispatches his henchmen to retrieve the money—and the girl—Lick and Al find themselves trying to outrun the bad guys and protect a damsel in distress. Is T.A. out to cheat her cheatin’ husband, or is she really just trying to stop an illegal scheme cooked up by F. Rank and the infamous Ponce de Crayon, Vegas’s most glamorous tiger tamer? Is she playing Lick—or is it love? Will Al Bean’s cockeyed plan, an able assist from Cody, Lick’s cowboy sidekick, a brigade of old-time rodeo reunioneers, and twenty miles of duct tape be enough to stop F. Rank’s nefarious schemes, reform a career party girl, and change the hearts and minds of ten of the world’s most thrill-seeking billionaires? Can Cody keep Lick from climbing onto raging bull Kamikaze’s back one more time? Can true love triumph over shoot-outs at the not-so-okay corral and close encounters with white tigers? Hey, this is Baxter Black—what do you think? With its colorful cast of characters, rip-roaring humor, and inventive language, this caper will have you riding high long after it gallops to a thunderously satisfying conclusion.