Book picks similar to
Rules of the Game by Neil Strauss


non-fiction
self-help
psychology
relationships

Emotional Intelligence 2.0


Travis Bradberry - 2003
    The book contains proven strategies from a decade-long effort to accurately measure and increase emotional intelligence. Trusted by upper-echelon leaders inside companies worldwide, these strategies will enable you to capitalize on the skills responsible for 58% of performance in all types of jobs.Includes a passcode for online access to the world's bestselling emotional intelligence test, the Emotional Intelligence Appraisal®, which will show you where your EQ stands today and what you can do to begin maximizing it immediately.Rooted in sound research involving more than 500,000 responses, this new edition of the test will:--Pinpoint which of the book's 66 emotional intelligence strategies will increase your EQ the most.--Reveal the specific behaviors responsible for your EQ scores.--Allow you to test yourself a second time to measure how much your EQ has increased from your efforts.The book's smooth narrative style turns rigorous research into memorable stories and practical strategies that anyone can use to his or her advantage.With 90% of top performers high in EQ, and EQ twice as important as IQ in getting where you want to go in life, who can afford to ignore it?What people are saying about it:"Emotional Intelligence 2.0 is a fast read with compelling anecdotes and good context in which to understand and improve your score."--Newsweek"Surveys of 500,000 people on the role of emotions in daily life have enabled the authors to hone EQ assessment to a 28-question online survey that can be completed in seven minutes."--The Washington Post"Read worthy strategies for improving emotional intelligence skills make this our how-to book of the week. It's nice to know that average IQ doesn't limit a person to average performance. And who can resist an online quiz with instant feedback?"--Newsday"Gives abundant, practical findings and insights with emphasis on how to develop EQ. Research shows convincingly that EQ is more important than IQ."--Stephen R. Covey, author, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People"This book can drastically change the way you think about success...read it twice."--Patrick Lencioni, author, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team"At last a book that gives how to's rather than just what to's. We need no more convincing that emotional intelligence is at the core of life success. What we need are practical ways of improving it. Bradberry and Greaves brilliant new book is a godsend. It will change your life."--Joseph Grenny, New York Times bestselling coauthor of Crucial Conversations"Emotional intelligence is an extremely important skill for personal and professional success. This book is excellent and the learning included in the free online test is cutting-edge. I strongly recommend it."--Ken Blanchard, bestselling business book author of all time; coauthor The One Minute Manager®"I distributed the book to my entire team. We found it very helpful in our dealings with each other and our internal customers. With all the new buzzwords over the past few years, the heart and soul of a company's culture is how they support and promote emotional intelligence. Those with foresight see that emotional intelligence will separate the good companies from the great ones. This book is a wonderful tool for a grass roots approach. If your desire is to be a truly resonate leader that people will trust and follow, this is an opportunity that cannot only change your professional career, but also your personal relationships."--Regina Sacha, vice president, human resources, FedEx Custom Critical"In the fast lane of business life today, people spend more time on computer keyboards, blackberries and conference calls than they do in face-to-face communication. We're expected to piece together broken conversations, cryptic voicemails, and abbreviated text messages to figure out how to proceed. In this increasingly complex web, emotional intelligence is more important than ever before. This book is filled with invaluable insights and information that no one can afford to ignore."--Rajeev Peshawaria, executive director, Goldman Sachs International

An Open Heart: Practicing Compassion in Everyday Life


Dalai Lama XIV - 2001
    As Tibet's leader-in-exile, he has worked tirelessly not only on behalf of the Tibetan people, but as a voice for human rights worldwide.

The Introvert's Way: Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World


Sophia Dembling - 2012
     This clever and pithy book challenges introverts to take ownership of their personalities...with quiet strength. Sophia Dembling asserts that the introvert’s lifestyle is not “wrong” or lacking, as society or extroverts would have us believe. Through a combination of personal insights and psychology, The Introvert’s Way helps and encourages introverts to embrace their nature, to respect traits they may have been ashamed of and reframe them as assets. You’re not shy; rather, you appreciate the joys of quiet. You’re not antisocial; instead, you enjoy recharging through time alone. You’re not unfriendly, but you do find more meaning in one-on-one connections than large gatherings. By honoring what makes them unique, this astute and inspiring book challenges introverts to “own” their introversion, igniting a quiet revolution that will change how they see themselves and how they engage with the world.

The Art of Thinking Clearly


Rolf Dobelli - 2011
    But by knowing what they are and how to spot them, we can avoid them and make better choices-whether dealing with a personal problem or a business negotiation; trying to save money or make money; working out what we do or don't want in life: and how best to get it.Simple, clear and always surprising, this indispensable book will change the way you think and transform your decision-making-work, at home, every day. It reveals, in 99 short chapters, the most common errors of judgment, and how to avoid them.

30 Covert Emotional Manipulation Tactics: How Manipulators Take Control In Personal Relationships


Adelyn Birch - 2014
     This small but powerful 33-page book focuses succinctly on identifying emotional manipulation. You will learn thirty tactics manipulators use to get what they want. You'll also learn to spot the warning signs within yourself that expose covert manipulation is taking place, even if you can't identify the specific tactics being used. This book is geared toward romantic relationships, especially those involving a pathological partner. Even so, the manipulation tactics covered are the same as those used by family members, coworkers, friends, and others. Covert emotional manipulation tactics are underhanded methods of control. Emotional manipulation methodically wears down your self-worth and self-confidence, and damages your trust in your own perceptions. It can make you unwittingly compromise your personal values, leading to a loss of self-respect and a warped self-concept. With your defenses weakened or completely disarmed in this manner, you are left even more vulnerable to further manipulation. Skilled manipulators get you to put your emotional well-being into their hands. Once you make that grave mistake, they methodically chip away at your identity and self-esteem until there’s little left, unless you identify it and put a stop to it. Learn the manipulator's game, so they can't play it with you.

Fortitude: American Resilience in the Era of Outrage


Dan Crenshaw - 2020
    When he learned how to see again, he didn't want anyone's pity. People shouldn't feel sorry for him, he decided, and they shouldn't feel sorry for themselves either. Most people's everyday challenges aren't as extreme as surviving combat or working to regain their sight, but that's just Crenshaw's point: If we can meet life's toughest challenges without resenting our luck or complaining, minor daily obstacles aren't worth our outrage. "Microaggressions" and "triggers" from mere words mean little to someone who's had bullets fly by their head. That's Crenshaw's simple lesson in FORTITUDE: Lighten up, toughen up, and get to work on what's important (hint: it's not giving into a culture of outrage, playing the victim, and seeking an apology).FORTITUDE is a no-nonsense advice book for a society desperately in need of tough love. With meditations on perseverance, failure, and finding much-needed heroes, the book is the antidote for a prevailing "safety culture" of trigger warnings and safe spaces. Interspersed with lessons and advice is Crenshaw's own story of how an average American kid from the Houston suburbs has faced all sorts of unexpected situations -- from war zones to the halls of Congress -- and managed to navigate them all with a few simple tricks: a sense of humor and an even greater sense that, no matter what anyone else around us says or does, we are in control of our own destiny.

You Are Now Less Dumb: How to Conquer Mob Mentality, How to Buy Happiness, and All the Other Ways to Outsmart Yourself


David McRaney - 2013
    A mix of popular psychology and trivia, McRaney’s insights have struck a chord with thousands, and his blog--and now podcasts and videos--have become an Internet phenomenon. Like You Are Not So Smart, You Are Now Less Dumb is grounded in the idea that we all believe ourselves to be objective observers of reality--except we’re not. But that’s okay, because our delusions keep us sane. Expanding on this premise, McRaney provides eye-opening analyses of fifteen more ways we fool ourselves every day, including: - The Misattribution of Arousal (Environmental factors have a greater affect on our emotional arousal than the person right in front of us) - Sunk Cost Fallacy (We will engage in something we don’t enjoy just to make the time or money already invested “worth it”) - Deindividuation (Despite our best intentions, we practically disappear when subsumed by a mob mentality) McRaney also reveals the true price of happiness, why Benjamin Franklin was such a badass, and how to avoid falling for our own lies. This smart and highly entertaining book will be wowing readers for years to come.

The Book of Numbers: Analyzing the ROI on the Pursuit of Women


Aaron Clarey - 2020
    Specifically, men’s desire to have sex with young and beautiful females. It’s not specifically female youth and beauty per se, as much as it is the fertility these things signal. But make no mistake about, female youth and beauty has powered the world economy since the beginning of time. And men are the economic engines that run on it.Consequently, in their pursuit of women, men have not only produced nearly every penny of GDP, but have created nearly every technological innovation in the history of the world. They’ve built civilizations from the ground up. Cured diseases through amazing medical advances. Laid incredible multi-trillion dollar transportation and communications infrastructures. And it isn’t even these great, Herculean achievements of man, as much as it is the daily grind billions of men today and in the past went through to attract a wife and support a family. From waking up in the morning, to going to school, to suffering a commute, to working overtime, to hitting the gym, to majoring in STEM, to going to war, even to the granular level of choosing which shirt to buy or what car to finance, nearly all of a man’s post-pubescent life is directly or indirectly dedicated towards the pursuit of women. And if there were no women, $90 trillion in global GDP and $360 trillion in wealth would simply disappear overnight. And the army of 50 billion men who’ve existed on this planet would never have produced the $3 quadrillion in total historic GDP that built society. Without female youth and beauty, humanity would simply not exist.But there is an opposite side to this total, historical, global GDP coin. Because while society screams bloody murder over wealth and income gaps between the sexes, nobody asks how all this economic production, let alone these financial disparities, came about. And while men no doubt out-earn women and own the lion’s share of global wealth, it is only because for every penny of GDP a man’s labor was put into it. That for every technological innovation, a man paid a price in terms of time, effort, toil, and mental energy. And the $90 trillion in global GDP we see today is not just cryptically “the total economic production of the world,” but can also be viewed as the total price men pay for their pursuit of women.And this essay asks just one simple question – “Is it worth it?”To date no serious economic analysis has been conducted on what is nothing short of the most important economic question facing men. And since men will likely account for the majority of economic production and technical innovation in the future, this also makes it the most important economic question facing the world. However, while the economic ramifications of men's pursuit of women are truly global, this essay has no grandiose ideas of convincing the world, let alone the economics profession, about the importance of whether it's in men's best interests to continue this pursuit. It only cares about the individual man reading this essay and whether the pursuit of women is personally worth it to him. In that regard this essay aims to inform the reader about the real mathematical chances of success he faces in the pursuit of women, as well as the modern day risks, so that he may make an informed economic decision as to how he best invests his life. It also aims to align the reader's expectations with reality so his life is not ruined by delusion or hope, both of which have ruined millions of lives in the past. But in short, this essay is nothing less than the most important cost-benefit analysis any man will read, which makes it mandatory reading for any man who wishes to take his life seriously.And I most certainly hope you do because you only get one of them.

The Shallows: What the Internet Is Doing to Our Brains


Nicholas Carr - 2010
    He also crystallized one of the most important debates of our time: As we enjoy the Net’s bounties, are we sacrificing our ability to read and think deeply?Now, Carr expands his argument into the most compelling exploration of the Internet’s intellectual and cultural consequences yet published. As he describes how human thought has been shaped through the centuries by “tools of the mind”—from the alphabet to maps, to the printing press, the clock, and the computer—Carr interweaves a fascinating account of recent discoveries in neuroscience by such pioneers as Michael Merzenich and Eric Kandel. Our brains, the historical and scientific evidence reveals, change in response to our experiences. The technologies we use to find, store, and share information can literally reroute our neural pathways.Building on the insights of thinkers from Plato to McLuhan, Carr makes a convincing case that every information technology carries an intellectual ethic—a set of assumptions about the nature of knowledge and intelligence. He explains how the printed book served to focus our attention, promoting deep and creative thought. In stark contrast, the Internet encourages the rapid, distracted sampling of small bits of information from many sources. Its ethic is that of the industrialist, an ethic of speed and efficiency, of optimized production and consumption—and now the Net is remaking us in its own image. We are becoming ever more adept at scanning and skimming, but what we are losing is our capacity for concentration, contemplation, and reflection.Part intellectual history, part popular science, and part cultural criticism, The Shallows sparkles with memorable vignettes—Friedrich Nietzsche wrestling with a typewriter, Sigmund Freud dissecting the brains of sea creatures, Nathaniel Hawthorne contemplating the thunderous approach of a steam locomotive—even as it plumbs profound questions about the state of our modern psyche. This is a book that will forever alter the way we think about media and our minds.

The Village Effect: Why Face-to-Face Contact Is Good for Our Health, Happiness, Learning, and Longevity


Susan Pinker - 2013
    From birth to death, human beings are hard-wired to connect to other human beings. Social networks matter: tight bonds of friendship and love heal us, help us to learn and remember, extend our lives and make us happy. But not just any social networks: we need the real, face-to-face, in-the-flesh encounters that tie human families, groups of friends and communities together. Marrying the findings of the new field of social neuroscience together with gripping human stories, Susan Pinker explores the impact of face-to-face contact from cradle to grave, from city to Sardinian mountain village, classroom to workplace, from love to marriage to divorce. Her results are enlightening and enlivening, and they challenge our assumptions. Most of us have left the literal village behind, and don't want to give up our new technologies and go back there. But, as Pinker writes so compellingly, we need close social bonds and uninterrupted face-time with our friends and families in order to thrive--even to survive. Creating our own "village effect" can make us happier. It can also save our lives.

The Way of Men


Jack Donovan - 2012
    They tell just-so stories to protect their ideology, their religion, their way of life. They look to women for a nod of approval before speaking. They give socially acceptable answers and half-truths.If what they have to say resonates with men, it is only because they manage to hint at the real answer.The real answer is that The Way of Men is The Way of The Gang.Manliness — being good at being a man — isn’t about impressing women. That’s a side effect of manliness.Manliness isn’t about being a good man. There are plenty of bad guys – real jerks –who are manlier than you are, and you know it.Manliness is about demonstrating to other men that you have what it takes to survive tough times.Manliness is about our primal nature. It’s about what men have always needed from each other if they wanted to win struggles against nature, and against other men.The Way of Men describes the four tactical virtues of the survival gang.The Way of Men explains what men want, and why they are rapidly disengaging from our child-proofed modern world.The Way of Men examines the alternatives, and sketches a path out of our “bonobo masturbation society” through a new Dark Age.

Lying


Sam Harris - 2011
    Most forms of private vice and public evil are kindled and sustained by lies. Acts of adultery and other personal betrayals, financial fraud, government corruption—even murder and genocide—generally require an additional moral defect: a willingness to lie.

Nine Ball: Confessions of an Angst-Ridden Maniac Who Decided to Get Laid or Die Trying


Jeff Allen - 2009
    There, would-be players shared their field reports, strategies, and results. They compared notes, exchanged critiques, and figured out a body of knowledge that defied everything men had ever been told about getting women--what has since come to be known as "game."The undisputed king of the field report was a player named "jlaix." This was the handle of Jeff Allen, who would go on to be a founding member of Real Social Dynamics with Tyler Durden and Papa, all of whom play major roles in Neil Strauss's "The Game," the bestselling expose of the world of pickup artists. In an arena founded on one-upmanship, Jeff Allen did it bigger and better than anyone. "Get Laid or Die Trying" presents in utterly shameless, hilarious, and graphic detail, Jeffy's gritty, 100 percent real, and jaw-droppingly astonishing feats of seduction, revealing exactly how one goes about: - Attracting the girl you want by sleeping with all of her friends- Getting into the pants of the hottest girl at the party--a total stranger--in less than thirty minutes- Deflecting last-minute resistance with a single word- Pulling a chick who is surrounded by ten jealous guys- Cutting out enormous dudes that could easily pound you to a "fine red mist"- Getting threesomes as your default extraction- Having a stable so big you have to trim it down, and other "quality problems"- Convincing a girl you just met that before you fuck her, she must mow your lawn Jeff's tactics produce superhuman results, yet he doesn't do anything you couldn't do--now that you've seen it done. The worst part? You could have been doing this your whole life.

Overwhelmed: Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Time


Brigid Schulte - 2014
    It is a deeply reported and researched, honest and often hilarious journey from feeling that, as one character in the book said, time is like a "rabid lunatic" running naked and screaming as your life flies past you, to understanding the historical and cultural roots of the overwhelm, how worrying about all there is to do and the pressure of feeling like we're never have enough time to do it all, or do it well, is "contaminating" our experience of time, how time pressure and stress is resculpting our brains and shaping our workplaces, our relationships and squeezing the space that the Greeks said was the point of living a Good Life: that elusive moment of peace called leisure.Author Brigid Schulte, an award-winning journalist for the Washington Post - and harried mother of two - began the journey quite by accident, after a time-use researcher insisted that she, like all American women, had 30 hours of leisure each week. Stunned, she accepted his challenge to keep a time diary and began a journey that would take her from the depths of what she described as the Time Confetti of her days to a conference in Paris with time researchers from around the world, to North Dakota, of all places, where academics are studying the modern love affair with busyness, to Yale, where neuroscientists are finding that feeling overwhelmed is actually shrinking our brains, to exploring new lawsuits uncovering unconscious bias in the workplace, why the US has no real family policy, and where states and cities are filling the federal vacuum.She spent time with mothers drawn to increasingly super intensive parenting standards, and mothers seeking to pull away from it. And she visited the walnut farm of the world's most eminent motherhood researcher, an evolutionary anthropologist, to ask, are mothers just "naturally" meant to be the primary parent? The answer will surprise you.Along the way, she was driven by two questions, Why are things the way they are? and, How can they be better? She found real world bright spots of innovative workplaces, couples seeking to shift and share the division of labor at home and work more equitably and traveled to Denmark, the happiest country on earth, where fathers - and mothers - have more pure leisure time than parents in other industrial countries. She devoured research about the science of play, why it's what makes us human, and the feminist leisure research that explains why it's so hard for women to allow themselves to. The answers she found are illuminating, perplexing and ultimately hopeful. The book both outlines the structural and policy changes needed - already underway in small pockets - and mines the latest human performance and motivation science to show the way out of the overwhelm and toward a state that time use researchers call ... Time Serenity.

Entre Nous: A Woman's Guide to Finding Her Inner French Girl


Debra Ollivier - 2003
    Why do French women always look inimitably stylish? How do they manage to sit in a café for a three-course lunch and a glass of wine...by themselves? What gives them the certainty that allows them to refuse anything-whether a man, a job, or a little black dress-that doesn't suit them perfectly?More than just a book on fashion, Entre Nous is about the essence of French living-its observations about French women and their ways will help you take the best of all pages from the French girl's book: the page that reveals how to really enjoy life."Ollivier spent a decade in France and learned a thing or two about how French women cultivate that sense of being easy in one's skin...(she) helps us bridge the cultural gap."- Seattle Times