When Pleasing You Is Killing Me


Les Carter - 2007
    With decades of experience as a psychotherapist, Dr. Les Carter takes you inside his counseling office, inviting you to share in real life stories of people just like you who are trying to make sense of persistent, controlling demands from all sorts of controlling people. A major premise explained by Dr. Carter is that every person has a built-in inclination to be controlling, but as maturation happens, controlling behaviors diminish. People pleasers are naturally positioned to increase their maturity since they are already predisposed to being loving, kind, and respectful. But when they routinely butt heads with controlling counterparts, their maturation is stunted as they predictably get pulled into power forms of communication that include coercion, shaming, accusations, defensiveness, anger, suppression, and the like. In the book, Dr. Carter will recount how real life pleasers developed relationship boundaries by incorporating assertiveness skills, ceasing unnecessary defensiveness, and setting aside false guilt for inner trust. Readers will be inspired to set their own pace in life, as opposed to letting the controller call the shots.

Thin


Lauren Greenfield - 2006
    Greenfield's photographs are paired with extensive interviews and journal entries from twenty girls and women who are suffering from various afflictions. We meet 15-year-old Brittany, who is convinced that being thin is the only way to gain acceptance among her peers; Alisa, a divorced mother of two whose hatred of her body is manifested in her relentless compulsion to purge; Shelly, who has been battling anorexia for six years and has had a feeding tube surgically implanted in her stomach; as well as many others. Alongside these personal stories are essays on the sociology and science of eating disorders by renowned researchers Joan Jacobs Brumberg, Dr. David Herzog, and Dr. Michael Strober. These intimate photographs, frank voices, and thoughtful discussions combine to make Thin not only the first book of its kind but also a portrait of profound understanding.

Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men


Robert Weiss - 2005
    A timely and important contribution to the body of recovery literature, Cruise Control provides understanding, empathy and encouragement to gay men seeking healthy sexual expression.

Why Is It Always About You? : The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism


Sandy Hotchkiss - 2002
    Exploring how individuals come to have this shortcoming, why you get drawn into their perilous orbit, and what you can do to break free, Hotchkiss describes the "Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism" and their origins. You will learn to recognize these hallmarks of unhealthy narcissism -- Shamelessness, Magical Thinking, Arrogance, Envy, Entitlement, Exploitation, Bad Boundaries -- and to understand the roles that parenting and culture play in their creation. Whether the narcissist in question is a coworker, spouse, parent, or child, Why Is It Always About You? provides abundant practical advice for anyone struggling to break narcissism's insidious spread to the next generation, and for anyone who encounters narcissists in everyday life.

You Might Be a Narcissist If...: How to Identify Narcissism in Ourselves and Others and What We Can Do about It


Paul D. Meier - 2009
    Why is this relationship so hard? It is so invigorating to know that we don't have to stay stuck]]even if we're not the one struggling with narcissism]]we can change the way we relate to the people who do.

Beat The Devil (Kindle Single)


Mishka Shubaly - 2013
    Over three decades, his affliction has spawned immeasurable chaos, destruction and debauched good times. While his rivals have graced the covers of Spin and Rolling Stone, Shubaly's projects inevitably flame out in the eleventh hour. Is he finally ready to give up his lifelong dream for good?

The Ropes That Bind: Based on a True Story of Child Sexual Abuse


Tracy Stopler - 2016
    Blaming herself for the heinous crime that happened because she didn't "go straight to school," Tali is bound by invisible chains of secrecy, shame, and self-imposed isolation. Her harrowing and illuminating journey to recovery begins in her twenties with the support of her mentor, Dr. Daniel Benson, with whom she experiences deep love and then heartbreak. Feeling lost, Tali travels to Israel where Kabbalah sparks her spiritualism, and then to Africa where an arduous climb up Mount Kilimanjaro ignites a newfound feeling of empowerment. Only when Tali goes back to the Bronx and learns that her unreported crime scene has become the site of a rehabilitation center, does she understand that there is one more road to travel prior to reaching freedom.

Fast Food for the Soul


Barbara Berger - 2000
    Fast Food for the Soul   We are what we think. We can change our lives by changing our thoughts. Our thoughts and words are all-powerful. Through our thoughts and words, we create our lives.   In this simple yet important book, Barbara Berger shows you how to harness the power of the mind to create the life you want. She reminds us of what is available to us - from the power of release and saying no to focusing, blessing, and giving. And she offers fast, effective techniques for solving health problems, financial difficulties, and other life challenges. Give your soul a boost and your heart a pick-me-up - when you change your thinking, you will ultimately change your life.   Decide on the life you want, visualize it, affirm it, decree it, focus on it, believe it, have faith in it, and you will find yourself living this life much sooner and faster than you ever dreamed possible.

Not One Of Them: A Story of Adoption, Alcoholism and Abuse


Judy Baldaccini - 2013
    She began to recklessly punch her daughter about the face and head, that unprovoked outburst, resulted from nothing other than seeing her young 7 year old daughter in 'her' home. Exasperated as Mother was almost every single day. “Go ahead say it Judith Ann,” and with that my clue was given, “I know Mother, I know I deserve nothing because I am nothing, and I am worth even less than that.” I said it as vehemently as one tells a child they're loved. My older adopted brother Jimmy, was in for it next. Although Mother never quite gave it to him in the same way. That didn't mean Jim was off the hook, for that same evening Father would begin his violent alcohol induced rages that may land him bleeding and slumped in the corner of his own bedroom. That was only the beginning of that evening’s terror because on many nights, Father would come to me next... This was our life, for no more than after we were adopted as mere babies, Mother went on to have two biological children, her beloved son and daughter. The doctor's admonition that conception would never occur, was certainly incorrect. Jim and I spent a lifetime paying for that physician's transgression. Judy's physical damage required over 10 surgeries to repair 'years old' bodily damage discovered in early adulthood where doctor upon doctor inquired, “how did this happen, who did this to you!” Unfortunately for Jimmy, a once bright and gifted straight A student, life since age 18 has him confined to mental facilities/ group home settings, never having the ability to live on his own. This is due to Jim's violent propensity to lash out in society, copying the abhorrent behavior Father unleashed at him for some thirteen plus years. If the emotional and physical torture went on through the childrens’ late teenage years, that would be tragic enough! However, what sets this story apart is Mother and Father's extreme self-righteous belief that in exchange for adopting them, a lifetime of repayment is required. Well into adulthood, with a cult like prevailing attitude Judy seeks to constantly pay them back- physically, emotionally and monetarily. Yet it is never enough as her own Mother seeks to destroy her oldest daughter's life. For these two children were despised, hated and came close to death throughout their lifetime, too many times to recall. For in this story- like no other out there, the age of adult children make no matter when parents want pay back for legally adopting. For nowhere will one find such a shocking look at an unbelievable attempt at survival. “Not One of Them: A story of Adoption, Alcoholism and Abuse" is the chilling true story of Judy Baldaccini, a little girl who went through hell, and not only survived, but became a stronger person because of it.

Facing Codependence: What it is, where it comes from, how it sabotages our lives


Pia Mellody - 2020
    

Courage to Change-One Day at a Time in Al‑Anon II: Part 1


Al-Anon Family Groups - 2015
    Insightful reflections reveal surprisingly simple things that can transform lives.

Facing the Shadow: Starting Sexual and Relationship Recovery: A Gentle Path to Beginning Recovery from Sex Addiction


Patrick J. Carnes - 2001
    Carnes broke new ground with Out of the Shadows. Facing the Shadows continued that pioneering spirit as the first book to take techniques used by thousands of people recovering from sex addiction and show, step by step, how to break free of this disease and live a healthier, more fulfilling life. This second edition adds timely material on cybersex and new science about arousal. This work sets the stage for recovery tasks at hand, and then provides practical, easy-to-follow exercises specifically designed to help understand and address them. You'll learn: Why denial is so powerful and what can be done to break through it. How to face the consequences of your behaviors using recovery principles. How to respond to change and crisis due to addiction How to manage life without dysfunctional behavior How spirituality affects recovery What to disclose and to whom How does sex addiction start and what does an addict need to know

Hooked: Five Addicts Challenge Our Misguided Drug Rehab System


Lonny Shavelson - 2001
    With court-mandated rehab being debated across the country, Shavelson’s in-depth look at the struggles of five addicts as they travel through the treatment maze makes a powerful case for reform.Highly readable and shaped by Shavelson’s experience as a journalist and physician, Hooked takes us through the anguishing “intake” and controversial House meetings, inside counselors’ and judges’ offices where many treatment decisions are made, and to prison cells where, under current policies, many addicts end up. It explores the links between drug addiction, mental illness, and trauma, including child abuse—links often ignored by current rehab efforts—and argues for an integrated approach that treats the roots of drug abuse, not just the behavior itself.Hailed as “compelling” and “heartbreaking” (Time Out), Hooked offers a provocative, honest look at the seemingly intractable issue of drug addiction, and offers powerful alternatives to our current policies.

Beyond the Tears: A True Survivor's Story


Lynn C. Tolson - 2003
    Tolson. The story begins with her suicide attempt at the age of twenty-five. In the aftermath, she commits to counseling to recover from anxiety and depression. The reader accompanies the author through therapy sessions, where the young woman reveals dysfunctional family relationships, including domestic violence, sexual abuse, and mental illness. She learns from her counselor that she'd been suffering from PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) which was the underlying cause of self-destructive behaviors, such as addictions and alcoholism. Due to the therapeutic process, the author discovers the value of life. Her story illustrates physical, emotional, and spiritual transformation. In sharing her inspirational journey, she provides readers with a message of hope.Author Lynn C. Tolson appeals to the reader from the first paragraph of her powerful memoir Beyond the Tears: A True Survivor's Story. Tolson uses creative non-fiction to tell her story, fascinating the reader with metaphor, prose, and poetry. Tolson tells her riveting story in first-person narrative, enabling the reader to instantly bond with her authentic voice. Readers can readily visualize the settings, plot, and characters due to the author's well-developed descriptions and dialogue. This is not an average auto-biography: the book combines story-telling with self-help, affirmations, meditations, and therapeutic concepts. Each chapter begins with a quote appropriate to the content, which gives the reader even more to contemplate. The topics challenge the reader to explore social problems within the context of family relationships. However, Tolson uses her clever wit to offer the reader occasional comic relief. Readers say that they simultaneously laughed and cried on the same page. Some readers say that reading the book literally changed their lives. Readers also say they view themselves and their families with a fresh perspective.

Life Is Tough (But So Are You): How to rise to the challenge when things go pear-shaped


Briony Benjamin - 2022
    "This is the book everyone needs to read when life takes an unexpected turn." - Mia Freedman, MamaMia Not all storms come to disrupt your life. Some come to clear your path. Viral video producer Briony Benjamin was a few months into a new job when she started feeling crappy... All. The. Time. Doctors told her she was just stressed and should rest more and learn to meditate. But it turns out she had cancer all through her body. Turning the camera on herself, Briony started documenting her journey in the short video You Only Get One Life. Its raw portrayal of her experience went viral, touching millions. Here Briony shares some of the important lessons learnt through her illness and recovery - everything from how to assemble your A Team in times of crisis and learning to make friends with the pain, to happy hacks for cutting yourself some slack and some great tips on being a kick-arse support human when a friend is going through the rough stuff. If you want to live the richest version of your life, bring some more joy into your day-to-day existence and have some tools up your sleeve for when things get tricksy, this book is for you. Because - spoiler alert - we all have to deal with our fair share of tough times sooner or later. It's how we handle them and bounce back afterwards that really matters.