You may very well find that getting frustrated and enraged might be the only way to get things changed around here.To help you achieve a new state of mild motivation, Screw Calm and Get Angry brings together several centuries of embattled and embittered epithets. It would seem that across the world and across the centuries, there is plenty of evidence to suggest you're not alone in bemoaning the way the odds are stacked:* On Politics: "The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly,' meaning 'many,' and the word 'ticks,' meaning 'blood sucking parasites.'" --Larry Hardiman* On Work: "By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day." --Robert Frost* On Money: "The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any." --Katherine Whitehorn* On Business: "Nothing is illegal if a hundred businessmen decide to do it, and that's true anywhere in the world." --Andrew Young* On War: "You can't say civilization don't advance...for in every war they kill you a new way." --Will Rogers* On Life: "If you wake up and you're not in pain, you know you're dead." --Russian proverbA parody of the famed Keep Calm and Carry On British motivational poster, and featuring the same successful format as our best-selling Keep Calm and Carry On book, Screw Calm and Get Angry is destined to be the motivational mantra for the realists of the world!

    They cannot skin a fish, dominate a battlefield, or transform majestic creatures of the Southern Hemisphere into piano keyboards.The Heming Way demonstrates how modern eunuchs—brainwashed by PETA and Alcoholics Anonymous—can learn from Papa's unparalleled example: drunken, unshaven, meat-devouring, wife-divorcing, and gloriously self-destructive.Advice includes:How to kill enough animals to render a species endangered—just like Papa!Getting your friends to think drinking a daiquiri is manly . . . just by drinking one nine yourselfAchieving sufficiently high testosterone levels to never have to worry about the chance of having a daughter instead of a sonAnd much more!Profane, insightful, hilarious and loaded with more than 150 photos, facts and insights about Papa, The Heming Way is a difficult path, and not for the weak, but truth is manlier than fiction.

    The death of a Heart Dog – a canine soul mate – is much, much worse … Even if you’ve experienced pet loss before, losing your canine soul mate is different. Typical grief advice isn’t nearly enough. Heart Dog answers all the big questions about canine soul mates, offers practical ideas for coping with each day’s dose of grief, and provides inspiration for finding your place in the world after such a profound loss. Others have survived the grief. You can too. Let Heart Dog be your guide.

    And after you read Why Do Dogs Drink out of the Toilet?, it will make perfect sense to you, too. Award-winning pet experts Dr. Marty Becker and Gina Spadafori take you on a trip into the canine mind. And it's not at all a scary place. . . .Dogs live to smell, to feel good, to clarify their relationship with other dogs (and with us), to love, to laugh. When you start looking at the world their way, everything falls into place. Of course they drink out of the toilet--the water is fresher. Sniffing another dog's behind is just like reading their resume, except you know nothing is made up. Barking at the letter carrier makes him go away--every single time! And rolling in stinky stuff just smells like heaven. (Because what smells heavenly is, after all, a matter of taste.)The better you understand dogs, the easier it is to love the pooch on your couch. Find out why hunting dogs don't mind suppressing their basic instinct, how assistance dogs for the blind get their job done, why little dogs like to mix it up with big dogs, and everything you always wanted to know about canine sex but were afraid to ask.You'll also find the answers to questions that tend to tickle your curiosity: How do dogs get into dog shows? Which breeds are made in America? Do some dogs really have dreadlocks? Do all dogs need a backyard? How did Lassie always find her way home?You've got questions? This book's got answers.

    Join Wendy Diamond, editor in chief of Animal Fair magazine, judge on Greatest American Dog, pet rescue advocate, author, regular expert on Today and general dog-lover and read 101 heartwarming, amusing, and inspirational stories about our best friends and faithful companions — our dogs.You’ll see your own dog with a new eye through these true stories about: the amazing intuition and intelligence of dogs dogs teaching us to enjoy every day learning to put things in perspective dogs changing people’s lives learning to say goodbye fabulous rescue dogs therapy dogs

    Whether you are involved in farming or ranching, or simply want to explore your herding dog's heritage, you will find a wealth of information here. For those with competitive goals, Herding Dogs will enhance your knowledge with a philosophy that has the dog's individual breed and personality as the central focus.Vergil S. Holland teaches the handler to understand the dog's reactions before beginning this progressive training. Whether it is your dog's first exposure to stock or your older dog with a new problem, you, as a handler, will find solutions to each problem and sound advice on each phase of training.Special chapters on different personalities of the various herding breeds, with training modifications tailored to these differences, make it possible for you and your dog as a team to reach your maximum potential.Herding commands and terms are thoroughly covered, as are those of basic Obedience for the stock dog. Working various kinds of stock-sheep, cattle and ducks-is covered to meet the needs of every stock dog owner. Detailed diagrams and concept maps throughout the book highlight the individualized training methods for each type of dog and stock.A Howell Dog Book of Distinction

    Powers, a self-described self-reflection junkie, challenges readers to create a more joyful life by using an easily adapted process outlined in Oh shift! Drawing on her New Jersey upbringing, Powers couples a provocative approach with fearless humor and wit to provide readers with the inspiration to become true shift heads. Powers shares both personal vignettes and client success stories to drive the Oh, shift! message home and to showcase the benefits of shifting in today's world. Chapters aptly titled to fit the Oh, shift! message include: Shift or get off the pot, Why take a shift?, Shift happens, The f'n shift, Let's shoot the shift, Scared shiftless and many more. This is not your everyday self-help book. The title may be funny, but the content is powerfully life-changing. The book utilizes a specially designed layout to emphasize important points and to make it a quick and enjoyable read. It guarantees to get the reader totally shift-faced.

    Dale Comstock is a Delta Force Operator - a member of America's secret army; the most enigmatic and combat tested elite counter-terrorism unit in the world. In his action packed story we journey with him from boyhood to manhood into a world of extreme violence where he learns the values of hard work, sacrifice, and love of family. As he succeeds and fails as a Delta Force Operator, Green Beret, husband and father, he elevates the meaning of being an American to being an American Badass.

    The method is based in the philosophy that a dog acts on its right to choose its actions. Koehler explained that a dog’s learned behavior is an act of choice based on its own learning experience. When those choices are influenced by the expectation of reward, the behavior will most likely be repeated, and when those choices are influenced by the anticipation of punishment, they will most likely cease. Once the dog has learned that its choices result in comfort or discomfort it can be taught to make the correct decisions. Action→Memory→Desire encapsulates the learning pattern used by the method; the dog acts, remembers the consequences, and forms the desire to repeat or avoid those consequences. Adherents believe that once the behavior has been correctly taught, it should be performed, thus making any correction, fair, reasonable, and expected.

    Kids love jokes! Jokes can aid in story-telling, create laughs, and help with conversation and social skills. Your child will love this hilarious joke book full of clean jokes about dogs and puppies. ** Amazon Prime Members can borrow this book for FREE! ** Kids and children can practice their reading and joke telling skills with this funny dog joke book. Beginning and early readers can enjoy hours of fun and entertainment. This book is especially great for traveling, waiting rooms, and reading aloud at home.Special Note: The illustrations in the book are optimized for a vivid and colorful experience in e-readers, tablets, phones, and computers! Jokes from this funny book... Q: Where do you usually find lost dogs?A: It all depends on where you lose them! HAHA! Q: What kind of dog sniffs out flowers?A: A bud hound! LOL! Q: What do you call a happy Lassie?A: A jolly collie! HAHA! Q: What kind of dog is a human's best friend?A: Palmation! LOL! Q: How do you stop a dog from barking in the front yard?A: Put him in the back yard! HAHA! Q: Why did the dog run in circles?A: Because it is not that easy to run in squares! Funny Dog Jokes for Kids! The Funniest Dog Jokes for in the World! (Clean Jokes for Children) 100+ funny dog and puppy jokes Excellent for early and beginning readers Hours of fun and entertainment for your child Great for long trips, waiting rooms, and reading aloud This funny joke book is full of funny dog and puppy jokes that will have you laughing for hours! This is one of the best joke collections in the world. These jokes about dogs and puppies will have you laughing for hours. These funny jokes are excellent for kids, children, teens, and adults. Early and beginner readers can practice reading aloud and learning. Scroll up and click 'buy' to get your paws on this funny joke book! 100% Money Back Guarantee Tags: funny dog jokes for kids, funny joke, funny jokes, lol, jokes, dogs, dog book, dog jokes book, ebook, dog books, funny, dog jokes, ebooks, dog jokes, kids, haha, hilarious, children, joke, kid, funny jokes for children, kids books, childrens books, childrens book, kids book, puppy books, puppies, cute, illustrations, illustrated, books for kids, childrens book, pupppy, puppy ebook, funny, haha, funny dog jokes, joke book, funny book, joke books, hilarious, lol, funny joke book, book about dogs, kindle book, kindle ebook, jokes online, comedy, humor, early reader, beginning reader, laugh, children, child, kid, kids, kids book, laughter, funniest jokes, laughing, kids comedy

    Colorful sidebars and numerous photographs highlight key information and provide extra training tips that every owner will appreciate.

    No matter what you’ve heard, there are always steps you can take to help your dog fight (and even beat) cancer. This scientifically researched guide is your complete reference for practical, evidence-based strategies that can optimize the life quality and longevity for your dog. No matter what diagnosis or stage of cancer your dog has, this book is packed with precious advice that can help now. Discover the Full Spectrum approach to dog cancer care: * Everything you need to know about conventional western veterinary treatments (surgery, chemotherapy and radiation) including how to reduce their side effects. * The most effective non-conventional options, including botanical nutraceuticals, supplements, nutrition, and mind-body medicine. * How to analyze the options and develop a specific plan for your own dog based on your dog’s type of cancer, your dog’s age, your financial and time budget, your personality, and many other personal factors. Imagine looking back at this time in your life, five years from now, and having not a single regret. You can help your dog fight cancer and you can honor your dog’s life by living each moment to the fullest, starting now. This book can help you as it has helped thousands of other dog lovers. THE AUTHORS Dr. Demian Dressler, DVM practices in Hawaii and is internationally recognized as "the dog cancer vet" Dr. Susan Ettinger, DVM is a veterinary oncologist and a diplomate of the American College of Internal Medicine who practices in New York. PRAISE FROM VETERINARIANS, AUTHORS & BOOK REVIEWERS"The future is upon us and this ground-breaking book is a vital cornerstone. In dealing with cancer, our worst illness, this Survival Guide is educational, logical, expansive, embracing, honest and so needed." -Dr. Marty Goldstein, DVMHolistic veterinarian and Host, Ask Martha Stewart’s Vet on Sirius Radio "The message of this book jumps off the written page and into the heart of every reader, and will become the at home bible for cancer care of dogs. The authors have given you a sensible and systematic approach that practicing veterinarians will cherish. I found the book inspiring and, clearly, it will become part of my daily approach to cancer therapy for my own patients." -Dr. Robert B. Cohen, VMD Bay Street Animal Hospital, New York "I wish that I had had The Dog Cancer Survival Guide when my dearly beloved Flat-coated Retriever, Odin, contracted cancer. It would have provided me alternative courses of action, as well as some well needed "reality checks" which were not available from conversations with my veterinarian. It should be on every dog owner’s book shelf--just in case..." -Dr. Stanley Coren, PhD, FRSC author of many books, including Born to Bark "A comprehensive guide that distills both alternative and allopathic cancer treatments in dogs...With the overwhelming amount of conflicting information about cancer prevention and treatment, this book provides a pet owner with an easy to follow approach to one of the most serious diseases in animals." -Dr. Barbara Royal, DVM The Royal Treatment Veterinary Center, Oprah Winfrey’s Chicago veterinarian "Picking up The Dog Cancer Survival Guide is anything but a downer: it's an 'empowerer.' It will make you feel like the best medical advocate for your dog. It covers canine cancer topics to an unprecedented depth and breadth from emotional coping strategies to prevention-in plain English.

    The authors share stories drawn from decades of experience leading pet loss groups and practicing family therapy. Their recommendations for taking care of yourself and loved ones during the rough spots of grief will answer all of your important questions and help you feel well-supported. I highly recommend The Pet Loss Companion for companion animal lovers like me. - Ed Sayres, President & CEO of the ASPCA(R)The Pet Loss Companion is a wonderfully reassuring book for anyone who cares about pets. It is a loving book, full of personal and practical details about how to care for oneself after loss. The authors are sensitive pet-lovers, empathic and engaging in this moving and meaningful book. - Monica McGoldrick, MSW, Ph.D. (h.c.), Director, Multicultural Family Institute, and author of You Can Go Home AgainIf you have ever lost a beloved pet and have wondered if your feelings are normal, this book is a must read for you. Ken and Nancy, in this single book, have captured the emotional roller coaster that most people experience during the end stages of the life of their pet. In addition there are helpful insights into their world as bereavement counselors and how they have helped their patients deal with the experiences of death. I have practiced Veterinary Medicine for over 30 years and have finally found a book that can be given to my grieving owners after such a trauma. - Anthony Miele, DVM, CEO, Veterinary Asset Management, Inc.What a gift Ken and Nancy's book is to those of us who have cherished and lost a pet companion. They get it, and as such, gently and skillfully help to ease the treacherous journey that loss is. This gem explores the terrain of loss and grief and the vast love that surrounds the experience. Readers will be warmed, saddened, and delighted by the examples and tools that are provided to ease the necessary grief process. The experience of reading this little book leaves me feeling much gratitude for my pet companions and these authors who so beautifully convey the huge role they play in our lives. - Lynn Parker, Ph.D., LCSW, Professor, Graduate School of Social Work, University of DenverSt. Hubert's Animal Welfare Center is proud to offer free pet loss support as part of its programmatic efforts, with Nancy Saxton-Lopez at the helm for over 20 years. Together Ken and Nancy continue to provide this valuable service at our center twice monthly and they've expanded their reach by sharing their professional training and direct pet loss counseling expertise with the completion of The Pet Loss Companion. Their compassion for both pets and the people who love them is palpable in this concise, easy-to-read guide which offers understanding, solace, and hope to anyone struggling with the loss of a cherished animal companion, no matter the circumstances. The loss of a companion animal is a unique, yet not unique, grieving process not always well understood by others. This book connects and thereby supports people at a time of what can be isolating grief, providing a life raft or light to navigate the process. It's also a helpful tool-whether as a gift or for personal awareness-for those looking for some guidance in supporting family and friends coping with pet loss. - Heather Cammisa, President & CEO, St. Hubert's Animal Welfare Center, Madison, New Jersey

    This is a book about surviving it." I felt like a babyless freak. No matter what we tried, I couldn’t get pregnant, even after standing on my head after sex. I was pretty sure I was the only woman on the planet going through infertility, certainly the only one jamming needles into my butt on commercial breaks during my favorite TV shows. Everyone was getting pregnant around me and no one was talking about what happened if you couldn’t. After my experience, I wanted to write a book for other infertile women and couples who feel alone, the book I wish I’d had when I was going through it, filled with dark humor and illustrations of quirky ovaries and whimsical sperm. If you’re like me, you want blunt, honest conversations about all the crazy stuff you’re going through with someone who’s been there and understands at least some of what you’re dealing with and how you’re feeling. And if it can somehow give you permission to laugh without diminishing the pain you’re feeling? Even better. This is the funnest book you’ll ever read about the worst thing that’s ever happened to you. Each chapter covers a different challenge with infertility and is broken into sections, a little of my story and concerns, a blurb from my husband, Alex, kind of a window into his dudely brain, and practical tips on how to cope. Read it yourself, read it as a couple, and if you’re struggling to explain your feelings to friends and family, hurl a copy at them and run away. I really wish you didn’t need this book, but since you do, come on over. You’re not alone.

    This gutsy move captured the heart of New Yorkers who dubbed her "Give 'em hell, Isabelle," and of media maven Becky Belden, who hires Isabelle to work at her magazine. When Isabelle discovers the many--seemingly random--deaths of Belden employees, she begins to wonder if the Becky Belden empire has a darker side behind its sweet, wholesome facade. She's about to find out...