He has, as they say, been around a bit. And as a result, he's got one or two things to tell us about how it all works; and being Jeremy Clarkson he's not about to voice them quietly, humbly and without great dollops of humour.In The World According to Clarkson, he reveals why it is that:Too much science is bad for our health'70s rock music is nothing to be ashamed ofHunting foxes while drunk and wearing night-sights is neither big nor cleverWe must work harder to get rid of cricketHe likes the Germans (well, sometimes)With a strong dose of common sense that is rarely, if ever, found inside the M25, Clarkson hilariously attacks the pompous, the ridiculous, the absurd and the downright idiotic, whilst also celebrating the eccentric, the clever and the sheer bloody brilliant.Less a manifesto for living and more a road map to modern life, The World According to Clarkson is the funniest book you'll read this year. Don't leave home without it.

    The little seed in the Styrofoam cup offers a reminder about our own mortality and the delicate nature of life . . . a spider who catches (and loses) a full-grown woman in its web one fine morning teaches us about surviving catastrophe . . . the love story of Jean-Francois Pilatre and his hot-air balloon reminds us to be brave and unafraid to “fly” . . . life lessons hidden in the laundry pile . . . magical qualities found in a box of crayons . . . hide-and-seek vs. sardines—and how these games relate to the nature of God. All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten is brimming with the very stuff of life and the significance found in the smallest details.

    But believe me: in this book, I’ll let you know exactly how to become a master spy just like me. Obviously, you won’t be as good at it as I am, but that’s because you’re you, and I’m Sterling Archer. I know, I know, it sucks not being me. But don’t beat yourself up about it, because I’m going to show you all the good stuff—what to wear; what to drink; how to seduce women (and, when necessary, men); how to beat up men (and, when necessary, women); how to tell the difference between call girls and hookers (hint: when they’re dead, they’re just hookers) and everything about weapons, secret devices, lying ex-girlfriends, and turtlenecks. In a word? How to Archer.

    The best-selling banjo method in the world! Earl Scruggs's legendary method has helped thousands of banjo players get their start. The Revised and Enhanced Edition features more songs, updated lessons, and many other improvements. It includes everything you need to know to start playing banjo, including: a history of the 5-string banjo, getting acquainted with the banjo, Scruggs tuners, how to read music, chords, how to read tablature, right-hand rolls and left-hand techniques, banjo tunings, exercises in picking, over 40 songs, how to build a banjo, autobiographical notes, and much more! The book/audio version includes recordings of Earl Scruggs playing and explaining over 60 examples! Audio is accessed online using the unique code inside the book and can be streamed or downloaded. The audio files include PLAYBACK+, a multi-functional audio player that allows you to slow down audio without changing pitch, set loop points, change keys, and pan left or right.

    This Book Will Change Your Life has even greater ambitions than its forefather, aiming to subvert not only your own life, but the whole of society—as only Benrik can. Part instruction book, part therapy, part religious cult, part sheer anarchy, this wickedly funny day planner will help you stick a spoke in the wheel of your routine, every day of the first year of your new life. Days to spice up your life include: * Claim you’re Jesus day * Lobby Celine Dion to sing about you * Bake naked day * Let children rule the world * Speak only Esperanto day * Speed-read War and Peace

    Food is instant, ready-made, and processed with unhealthy additives. Dry cleaners press shirts, delivery guys bring pizza, gardeners tend flowers, and, yes, tailors sew on those pesky buttons. But life can be much simpler, sweeter, and richer–and a lot more fun, too! As your grandmother might say, now is not the time to be careless with your money, and it actually pays to learn how to do things yourself!Practical and empowering, How to Sew a Button collects the treasured wisdom of nanas, bubbies, and grandmas from all across the country–as well as modern-day experts–and shares more than one hundred step-by-step essential tips for cooking, cleaning, gardening, and entertaining, including how to• polish your image by shining your own shoes• grow your own vegetables (and stash your bounty for the winter)• sweeten your day by making your own jam• use baking soda and vinegar to clean your house without toxic chemicals• feel beautiful by perfecting your posture• roll your own piecrust and find a slice of heaven• fold a fitted sheet to crisp perfection• waltz without stepping on any toesComplete with helpful illustrations and brimming with nostalgic charm, How to Sew a Button provides calm and comfort in uncertain times. By doing things yourself, with care and attention, you and your loved ones will feel the pleasing rewards of a job well done.

    For ages women have come together over coffee, cocktails, or late-night phone chats to analyze the puzzling behavior of men. Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo are here to say that —despite good intentions— you're wasting your time. Men are not complicated, although they'd like you to think they are. And there are no mixed messages. He's Just Not That Into You —based on a popular episode of Sex and the City— educates otherwise smart women on how to tell when a guy just doesn't like them enough, so they can stop wasting time making excuses for a dead-end relationship. This book knows you're a beautiful, smart, funny woman who deserves better.

    

    After three decades of fatherhood, there are certain things he has learned during his tenure. His way of raising his children involves, of course, lots of humor (don't curse near a mimicking child), but also the sound advice of a lifelong educator (you can't start reading to a baby too early). With PAPADADDY'S BOOK FOR NEW FATHERS, a great storyteller shares his wisdom with other dads, young and old alike. Writing from experience, observation, and his vivid imagination, Clyde Edgerton conveys both caution and joy--mostly joy.

    But does he know how to hide a dead body? Or cry with diginity? If not, this book's for him' COSMOPOLITAN, Book of the MonthA TOP GEAR magazine Book of the MonthPRODUCT DESCRIPTIONCall yourself a man? You do? Do you even know what a real man is? Are you a six-foot-one Adonis who wears all the latest fashions, moisturises regularly, visits spas for pleasure and never does anything wrong? Or do you drink twenty pints every Friday night, guzzle a kebab on the way home and then fart yourself to sleep? It's time to stop being the man everyone expects you to be and be the one you want to be.Learn how to:- Pick locks, safes and chastity belts- Disappear without a trace in 24 hours- Win a gun fight- Survive the wild- Ride a wall of death- Work a 4-hour week- Survive any crisis- Make things go boom- Drive cars sideways- Be a great dad…and, of course, drive a tank. Fast-paced and funny, this is the ultimate bible for the modern man.* A 'dangerous book for men' - how to embrace life to the full and how to be your own man * Top Gear meets 101 Things To Do Before You Die (Richard Horne)

    Arranged into 13 chilling chapters like Haunted Hollywood, Blood Red Crosses and Gross Anatomy: Hospital Horrors, Bride of Bizarre, and Tales from the Cryptids, Beyond Bizarre tackles everything from female pirates and creepy candy stripers to psychic predictions and virgin shark birthsand much, much more.A word of warning: this book is not for the faint of heart!

    This third edition of the best-selling and most trusted homebrewing guide includes a complete update of all instructions, recipes, charts, and guidelines. Everything you need to get started is here, including classic and new recipes for brewing stouts, ales, lagers, pilseners, porters, specialty beers, and honey meads.The Complete Joy of Homebrewing, third edition, includes:* Getting your home brewery together: the basics -- malt, hops, yeast, and water * Ten easy lessons for making your first batch of beer * Creating world-class styles of beer (IPA, Belgian wheat, German Kölsch and Bock, barley wine, American lagers, to name a few) * Using fruit, honey, and herbs for a spicier, more festive brew * Brewing with malt extracts for an unlimited range of strengths and flavors* Advanced brewing techniques using specialty hops or the all-grain method or mash extracts* A complete homebrewer's glossary, troubleshooting tips, and an up-to-date resource section* And much, much more Be sure to check out Charlie's The Homebrewer's Companion for over 60 additional recipes and more detailed charts and tables, techniques, and equipment information for the advanced brewer.

    Into the Mirror is the story of FBI Special Agent Robert P. Hanssen, the master spy who singlehandedly created the greatest breach of security in the country's history. Written in novelistic prose, Schiller creates a gripping portrait of Hanssen, who for 22 years was a loving husband, devoted father of six, devout Catholic & member of Opus Dei, passionate anticommunist, dedicated FBI agent & a traitor. On 2/18/01, the FBI arrested Hanssen & charged him with selling to the Russians--over a period of more than 20 years--top-secret, classified information. Nothing reported to date about this ordinary-looking but tormented man has revealed the facts that Schiller & Norman Mailer--collaborators on the Pulitzer Prize-winning The Executioner's Song & Oswald's Tale--uncovered during their 9-month investigation into the life of this man. Seeking to solve this mystery, they spent hundreds of hours interviewing members of his family as well as his closest friends, colleagues & fellow church members. They traveled to Moscow to interview a key member of the KGB who had handled the spy they knew only as "Ramon Garcia." Into the Mirror gets inside the mind of a devious & dangerously brilliant man & creates a portrait of someone so caught up in the struggle with his own personal demons that he would betray everything he held sacred: his wife, family, religion & country.

    Let’s just go ahead and call that, “25 bonus tips,” shall we? Boom. Value added.)The book features sections such as:“The Transubstantiation of Trope,” “Why Bad Decisions Are A Good Decision,” “Nobody Sees Themselves As A Supporting Character,” "I Want To Buy The Semi-Colon A Private Sex Island," and “Plot Is Promise.”Contained within are things you should know about plot holes, self-publishing versus legacy publishing, "on-the-nose" dialogue, story versus plot, metaphors, copy-editing, killing darlings with a claw hammer, cursing like an undead pirate, and generally being a cranky and irreverent creative type.

    Be Very Afraid.From ghosts, vampires, and zombies to serial killers, cannibalistic hillbillies, and haunted Japanese videocassettes, How to Survive a Horror Movie shows how to defeat every obstacle found in scary films. Readers will discover:- How to Perform an Exorcism - What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer - How to Persuade the Skeptical Local Sheriff - How to Vanquish a Murderous Doll - How to Survive an Alien Invasion - How to Tell If You've Been Dead Since the Beginning of the Movieand much, much more. Complete with useful instructions, insane illustrations, and a list of 100 important films to study, How to Survive a Horror Movie is essential reading for prom queens, jocks, teenage babysitters, and anyone employed by a summer camp.