Volcanoes. Sharks. Quicksand. Terrorists. The pilot of the plane blacks out and it's up to you to land the jet. What do you do? The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook is here to help: jam-packed with how-to, hands-on, step-by-step, illustrated instructions on everything you need to know FAST-from defusing a bomb to delivering a baby in the back of a cab. Providing frightening and funny real information in the best-selling tradition of the Paranoid's Pocket Guide and Hypochondriac's Handbook, this indispensable, indestructible pocket-sized guide is the definitive handbook for those times when life takes a sudden turn for the worse. The essential companion for a perilous age. Because you never know...

    Acclaimed illustrator Keri Smith encourages journalers to engage in "destructive" acts-poking holes through pages, adding photos and defacing them, painting with coffee, and more-in order to experience the true creative process. Readers discover a new way of art and journal making-and new ways to escape the fear of the blank page and fully engage in the creative process.

    Apple products, indie music, food co-ops, and vintage T-shirts make them weak in the knees. They believe they’re unique, yet somehow they’re all exactly the same, talking about how they “get” Sarah Silverman’s “subversive” comedy and Wes Anderson’s “droll” films. They’re also down with diversity and up on all the best microbrews, breakfast spots, foreign cinema, and authentic sushi. They’re organic, ironic, and do not own TVs. You know who they are: They’re white people. And they’re here, and you’re gonna have to deal. Fortunately, here’s a book that investigates, explains, and offers advice for finding social success with the Caucasian persuasion. So kick back on your IKEA couch and lose yourself in the ultimate guide to the unbearable whiteness of being.

    You’ve had a martini or three, and you mingle through the crowd, wondering how long you need to stay before going out for pizza. Suddenly you’re introduced to someone new, Dr. Nice Tomeetya. You forget the pizza. Now is the perfect time to bring up all those strange questions you’d like to ask during an office visit with your own doctor but haven’t had the guts (or more likely the time) to do so. You’re filled with liquid courage . . . now is your chance! If you’ve ever wanted to ask a doctor . . .•How do people in wheelchairs have sex?•Why do I get a killer headache when I suck down my milkshake too fast?•Can I lose my contact lens inside my head forever?•Why does asparagus make my pee smell?•Why do old people grow hair on their ears?•Is the old adage “beer before liquor, never sicker, liquor before beer . . .” really true? . . . then Why Do Men Have Nipples? is the book for you.Compiled by Billy Goldberg, an emergency medicine physician, and Mark Leyner, bestselling author and well-known satirist, Why Do Men Have Nipples? offers real factual and really funny answers to some of the big questions about the oddities of our bodies.

    But today's woman needs more than a book of soppy affirmations to get her back on her feet and feeling great. I Used to Miss Him... is full of smart tips, sarcastic stories and hilarious ways to heal after a breakup. This book provides the sort of genuine advice you'd get from your best friend, but with a "rip his head off" attitude. By supporting a girl's right to be angry with her ex, this fun guide helps her rebuild her strength and confidence after he's gone.Features edgy advice on how to:Cash in on his lifelong guiltLook sexy and feel fabulous (then run into him at a party)Make an ex-boyfriend voodoo dollLose the guy, keep the jewelryAdvertise being singleStalk responsibly to keep him on his toesMaximize post-breakup pamperingI Used to Miss Him... is the ultimate breakup survival guide for today's woman!

    Find out which apps are the best, and how to use them. Check prices instantly, and know your potential profits before risking a dime. Learn to resell on eBay and Amazon, and rake in the profits. Find bargain inventory virtually anywhere--yard sales, retail stores, outlet malls, warehouse clubs, wholesale dealers, bargain basements, and online bulk suppliers. Learn to specialize in books, videos, games, toys, electronics, grocery, fashion, health and beauty, auto parts, niche regional products--or take them all! Many books promise to teach you how to start an online business. Look closely, though, and you'll see that very few are written by someone who's really done it. Author Steve Weber has been a full-time, five-star seller on Amazon.com and eBay for 10 years! * Feed your e-commerce business with a continual stream of hot products. * Learn how to leverage the "Long Tail" of retail for low-risk, high-return profits. * Uncover niche products online shoppers want to buy. * Diversify your product line. * Learn to minimize sales taxes and write off the business use of your home office and car. * Find new and hard-to-find products from real wholesalers. * Know exactly how much potential inventory is worth, and how quickly it sells. * Get dirt-cheap warehouse space. * Get the best product research tools available for your phone. * Outsource your fulfillment and customer service tasks. * Benefit from advice from the most experienced, profitable online sellers. The Internet Gold Rush is just getting started. In this insider's guide to online selling, you'll learn the secrets to profitable trading. You can profit from price differences in local and global markets. This book teaches you how, every step of the way.

    You may very well find that getting frustrated and enraged might be the only way to get things changed around here.To help you achieve a new state of mild motivation, Screw Calm and Get Angry brings together several centuries of embattled and embittered epithets. It would seem that across the world and across the centuries, there is plenty of evidence to suggest you're not alone in bemoaning the way the odds are stacked:* On Politics: "The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly,' meaning 'many,' and the word 'ticks,' meaning 'blood sucking parasites.'" --Larry Hardiman* On Work: "By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day." --Robert Frost* On Money: "The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any." --Katherine Whitehorn* On Business: "Nothing is illegal if a hundred businessmen decide to do it, and that's true anywhere in the world." --Andrew Young* On War: "You can't say civilization don't advance...for in every war they kill you a new way." --Will Rogers* On Life: "If you wake up and you're not in pain, you know you're dead." --Russian proverbA parody of the famed Keep Calm and Carry On British motivational poster, and featuring the same successful format as our best-selling Keep Calm and Carry On book, Screw Calm and Get Angry is destined to be the motivational mantra for the realists of the world!

    Peter Bowler will teach you the practical riches of saying it well with good words, neglected words, and precise words for vocabular exultation!

    It rejoices in men and women made of the Wrong Stuff: writers who believed in the power of words, but could never quite find the rights ones; artists and performers who indulged their creative impulse with a passion, if not a sense of the ridiculous, an eye for perspective or the ability to hold down a tune; scientists and businessmen who never quite managed to quit while they were ahead; and sportsmen who seemed to manage always to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Like Walter Oudney, one of three men chosen to find the source of the River Niger in Africa, who could not ride a horse, nor speak any foreign languages and who had never travelled more than 30 miles beyond his native Edinburgh; or the explorer-priest Michel Alexandre de Baize, who set off to explore the African continent from east to west equipped with 24 umbrellas, some fireworks, two suits of armor, and a portable organ; or the Scottish army which decided to invade England in 1349 - during the Black Death. Entries include: briefest career in dentistry; least successful bonding exercise; most futile attempt to find a lost tribe; most pointless lines of research by someone who should have known better; least successful celebrity endorsement; least convincing excuse for a war; worst poetic tribute to a root vegetable; least successful display of impartiality by a juror; Devon Loch - sporting metaphor for blowing un unblowable lead; least dignified exit from office by a French president; and least successful expedition by camel.

    In 1989, when Dr. Betty Edwards revised the book, it went straight to the Times list again. Now Dr. Edwards celebrates the twentieth anniversary of her classic book with a second revised edition.Over the last decade, Dr. Edwards has refined her material through teaching hundreds of workshops and seminars. Truly The New Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain, this edition includes:the very latest developments in brain researchnew material on using drawing techniques in the corporate world and in educationinstruction on self-expression through drawingan updated section on using colordetailed information on using the five basic skills of drawing for problem solving

    The tests cover every aspect of personality--intelligence, self-esteem, ambition, platonic and romantic relationships--and, at the end of each, expert advice to help readers change their lives for the better is included.

    Because, though villains may never win, they sure have more fun, hatching master plans for world domination, smoothing their dastardly tights. Neil Zawacki answers all the most urgent questions: Should I go with a black or red theme? Do I invest in an army of winged monkeys or ninja warriors? And just where will I put the evil hideout? Whether readers choose to pursue a career as a Criminal Mastermind, Mad Scientist, Corporate Bastard, or just a Wanna-be Evil Genius, they are sure to find plenty of tips for jumpstarting any evil enterprise. Cheaper than attending the annual bad guy conference and way more fun than being good, How to Be a Villain is guaranteed to elicit deep-throated evil laughs across the land.

    No agonizing choices between light reading and the serious stuff. This 4-ply reader has it all: entertainment, humor, education, trivia, science, history, pop culture . and more! Of course, it's even divided by length - you can spend a minute with the Quickies, relax with Normal Length articles, or really get comfortable with long Items.With Uncle John's 4-Ply Bathroom Reader strategically placed in your home, you'll settle in happily and read about:The Origins of Common Words and PhrasesThe 7 Wonders of the Ancient WorldThe Real Difference Between Burger King and McDonald'sElvis's Letter to Richard NixonThe Curse of King TutWhat's in a TwinkieBizarre Lawsuits . and a whole lot more.

    Concrete Countertops is an essential book for architects, homeowners and contractors who want to learn how to design, form, mix, pour, color, trowel, inlay and finish decorative concrete countertops. Homeowners will be inspired by the 350 color photographs that bring this exciting medium to life.

    Ask your parents. Ask someone you hardly know. THE BOOK OF QUESTIONS gives you permission to ask those things that are too bold, too embarrassing, or just too difficult to ask by yourself. You will find questions of integrity; of sex; of what you would do for money; even things too personal to talk about out loud.Whether you use it as a tool for self-discovery or as a provocative way to stimulate conversation, this book constantly challenges attitudes, orals, beliefs--and it challenges you.--back cover