Go for No! Yes is the Destination, No is How You Get There


Richard Fenton - 2007
    Go for No! chronicles four days in the life of fictional character Eric Bratton, a call reluctant copier salesman who wakes up one morning to find himself in a strange house with no idea of how he got there. But this house doesn t belong to just anyone! It belongs to him... a wildly successful, ten years in the future version of the person he could become if he learns to overcome his self-limiting beliefs and overcome his fear of failure. Through the dialogue of the two main characters the authors have fashioned an entertaining story to present the key concepts essential to sales success. Readers learn... ...What it takes to outperform 92% of the world s salespeople...That failing and failure are two very different things ...Why it s important to celebrate success and failure ...How to get past failures quickly and move on ...That the most empowering word in the world is not yes... it s NO!Written to be intentionally short and to the point, Go for No! is a quick, fun read with valuable lessons that can change the way you think, sell, and live!

Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life


Justin J. Lehmiller - 2018
    What do Americans really want when it comes to sex? And is it possible for us to get what we want? Justin J. Lehmiller, one of the country's leading experts on human sexuality and author of the popular blog Sex and Psychology, has made it his career's ambition to answer these questions. He recently concluded the largest and most comprehensive scientific survey of Americans' sexual fantasies ever undertaken, a monumental two-year study involving more than 4,000 Americans from all walks of life, answering questions of unusual scope. Based on this study, Tell Me What You Want offers an unprecedented look into our fantasy worlds and what they reveal about us. It helps readers to better understand their own sexual desires and how to attain them within their relationships, but also to appreciate why the desires of their partners may be so incredibly different. If we only better understood the incredible diversity of human sexual desire and why this diversity exists in the first place, we would experience less distress, anxiety, and shame about our own sexual fantasies and better understand why our partners often have sexual proclivities that are so different from our own. Ultimately, this book will help readers to enhance their sex lives and to maintain more satisfying relationships and marriages in the future by breaking down barriers to discussing sexual fantasies and allowing them to become a part of readers' sexual realities.

Delivered from Distraction: Getting the Most out of Life with Attention Deficit Disorder


Edward M. Hallowell - 2004
    Widely recognized as the classic in the field, the book has sold more than a million copies. Now a second revolution is under way in the approach to ADD, and the news is great. Drug therapies, our understanding of the role of diet and exercise, even the way we define the disorder–all are changing radically. And doctors are realizing that millions of adults suffer from this condition, though the vast majority of them remain undiagnosed and untreated. In this new book, Drs. Edward M. Hallowell and John J. Ratey build on the breakthroughs of Driven to Distraction to offer a comprehensive and entirely up-to-date guide to living a successful life with ADD.As Hallowell and Ratey point out, “attention deficit disorder” is a highly misleading description of an intriguing kind of mind. Original, charismatic, energetic, often brilliant, people with ADD have extraordinary talents and gifts embedded in their highly charged but easily distracted minds. Tailored expressly to ADD learning styles and attention spans, Delivered from Distraction provides accessible, engaging discussions of every aspect of the condition, from diagnosis to finding the proper treatment regime. Inside you’ll discover• whether ADD runs in families• new diagnostic procedures, tests, and evaluations• the links between ADD and other conditions• how people with ADD can free up their inner talents and strengths• the new drugs and how they work, and why they’re not for everyone• exciting advances in nonpharmaceutical therapies, including changes in diet, exercise, and lifestyle• how to adapt the classic twelve-step program to treat ADD• sexual problems associated with ADD and how to resolve them• strategies for dealing with procrastination, clutter, and chronic forgetfulnessADD is a trait, a way of living in the world. It only becomes a disorder when it impairs your life. Featuring gripping profiles of patients with ADD who have triumphed, Delivered from Distraction is a wise, loving guide to releasing the positive energy that all people with ADD hold inside. If you have ADD or care about someone who does, this is the book you must read.From the Hardcover edition.

Open: An Uncensored Memoir of Love, Liberation, and Non-Monogamy


Rachel Krantz - 2022
    Excited and a little trepidatious, Rachel set out to see whether love and a serious partnership with Adam could coexist alongside the freedom to explore relationships with other people. Their relationship was designed to strike an exquisite balance between intimacy and independence, calibrated to fan desire for the long haul.Armed with her instincts from her career as a journalist, Rachel not only put her own heart on the line, she also kept detailed journals, interviewed experts and therapists, immersed herself in the polyamory community, and relentlessly interrogated her own emotions. Now, in her debut memoir, she chronicles her dive into non-monogamy--from debilitating anxiety spirals to heart-opening connections with the men and women she dates--with an unflinching eye, fly-on-the-wall detail, and extraordinary perceptiveness. Through page-turning storytelling, she takes us inside the Brooklyn parties where Rachel first dips her toes in the water of non-monogamy; into the wider swinger and polyamory community where they search for a relationship style that suits them; and into her private moments with Adam and their other lovers. As she and Adam attempt to write a new plot for their love story, she also runs up against miscommunications, ancient power dynamics, and seeming betrayals that threaten the foundation of their love. Rachel breaks new ground in confronting the unique ways coercion and gaslighting manifest in open relationships, and finds herself wondering what liberation really looks like.Casting new light on universal experiences like jealousy, restlessness, and love, Open explores the seemingly endless range of relationships couples have created to answer their desires, and ultimately probes the questions: Can we have both freedom and love? How can we reconcile comfort and lust? Is a relationship ever equal? And is the pleasure worth the pain?

Conquering Shame and Codependency: 8 Steps to Freeing the True You


Darlene Lancer - 2014
    Unemploment and isolation as a result of the pandemic can fuel these negative feelings. Darlene Lancer's book offers help for this particularly hard time.Learn how to heal from the destructive hold of shame and codependency by implementing eight steps that will empower the real you and lead to healthier relationships. Shame: the torment you feel when you’re exposed, humiliated, or rejected; the feeling of not being good enough. It’s a deeply painful and universal emotion, yet is not frequently discussed. For some, shame lurks in the unconscious, undermining self-esteem, destroying confidence, and leading to codependency. These codependent relationships--where we overlook our own needs and desires as we try to care for, protect, or please another--often cover up abuse, addiction, or other harmful behaviors. Shame and codependency feed off one another, making us feel stuck, never able to let go, move on, and become the true self we were meant to be. In Conquering Shame and Codependency, Darlene Lancer sheds new light on shame: how codependents’ feelings and beliefs about shame affect their identity, their behavior, and how shame can corrode relationships, destroying trust and love. She then provides eight steps to heal from shame, learn to love yourself, and develop healthy relationships.

Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It


Ethan Kross - 2021
    Tell a stranger that you talk to yourself, and you're likely to get written off as eccentric. But the truth is that we all have a voice in our head. When we talk to ourselves, we often hope to tap into our inner coach but find our inner critic instead. When we're facing a tough task, our inner coach can buoy us up: Focus--you can do this. But, just as often, our inner critic sinks us entirely: I'm going to fail. They'll all laugh at me. What's the use?In Chatter, acclaimed psychologist Ethan Kross explores the silent conversations we have with ourselves. Interweaving groundbreaking behavioral and brain research from his own lab with real-world case studies--from a pitcher who forgets how to pitch, to a Harvard undergrad negotiating her double life as a spy--Kross explains how these conversations shape our lives, work, and relationships. He warns that giving in to negative and disorienting self-talk--what he calls "chatter"--can tank our health, sink our moods, strain our social connections, and cause us to fold under pressure.But the good news is that we're already equipped with the tools we need to make our inner voice work in our favor. These tools are often hidden in plain sight--in the words we use to think about ourselves, the technologies we embrace, the diaries we keep in our drawers, the conversations we have with our loved ones, and the cultures we create in our schools and workplaces.Brilliantly argued, expertly researched, and filled with compelling stories, Chatter gives us the power to change the most important conversation we have each day: the one we have with ourselves.

The Message Game: A Guide To Dating At The Touch Of A Button


Ice White - 2020
    It's not just a dating guide for men to get dates quickly and efficiently through dating apps like Tinder, or social media. It's about becoming a good communicator, knowing how to lead conversations and being able to set up genuinely fun activities that maximize your sexual results and relationships. With hundreds of analyzed screenshots collected from dedicated Message Game followers and Ice White himself, this is a visual guide with real stories of sex and adventures, and real conversations that have provided an understanding of successes and failures. All the learning has been done for you and compiled into a structured guide that can answer all your possible questions. From maximizing how many contacts and phone numbers you get to setting up dates quickly, from getting dates to getting laid, and from logistics to escalation. The book also features special sections that are especially useful, such as:The Situation Index - A table of common situations with references to every single page that has explained or showed the given situation. She isn't responding? She doesn't want anything serious? She says she is busy? She is only visiting your town or city? She thinks you just want sex? Whatever it is, we have the pages. Frequently Asked Questions - A summary of many common questions, such as how long you should wait to reply, how iften you should message someone, if you should use Tinder superlikes, if you should swipe a certain way on Tinder, and SO MUCH MORE. Without hesitation, this book is your own personal guide to getting the dates you want as frequently as possible.

We Need to Talk: How to Have Conversations that Matter


Celeste Headlee - 2017
    Headlee is a talented, honest storyteller, and her advice has helped me become a better spouse, friend, and mother.”  (Jessica Lahey, author of New York Times bestseller The Gift of Failure)Today most of us communicate from behind electronic screens, and studies show that Americans feel less connected and more divided than ever before. The blame for some of this disconnect can be attributed to our political landscape, but the erosion of our conversational skills as a society lies with us as individuals.And the only way forward, says Headlee, is to start talking to each other. In We Need to Talk, she outlines the strategies that have made her a better conversationalist—and offers simple tools that can improve anyone’s communication. For example: BE THERE OR GO ELSEWHERE. Human beings are incapable of multitasking, and this is especially true of tasks that involve language. Think you can type up a few emails while on a business call, or hold a conversation with your child while texting your spouse? Think again.CHECK YOUR BIAS. The belief that your intelligence protects you from erroneous assumptions can end up making you more vulnerable to them. We all have blind spots that affect the way we view others. Check your bias before you judge someone else.HIDE YOUR PHONE. Don’t just put down your phone, put it away. New research suggests that the mere presence of a cell phone can negatively impact the quality of a conversation.Whether you’re struggling to communicate with your kid’s teacher at school, an employee at work, or the people you love the most—Headlee offers smart strategies that can help us all have conversations that matter.

We: Understanding the Psychology of Romantic Love


Robert A. Johnson - 1945
    

Triggers: Creating Behavior That Lasts—Becoming the Person You Want to Be


Marshall Goldsmith - 2015
    Triggers shows us how to break that cycle and enact meaningful change.In Triggers, renown executive coach and psychologist Marshall Goldsmith discusses the emotional triggers that set off a reaction or a behavior in us that often works to our detriment. Do you find that at times you suddenly become defensive or enraged by an idle comment from a colleague? Or that your temper rises when another car cuts you off in traffic? Your reactions don’t occur in a vacuum. They are the result of emotional and psychological triggers that often happen only in specific settings—at meetings, or in competitive situations, or with a specific person who rubs you the wrong way, or when you feel under particular pressure. Being able to recognize those triggers and understand how the environment affects our behavior is key to controlling our responses and managing others at work and in life. Make no mistake—change is hard. And the starting point is the willingness to accept help, and the desire to change. This book will show you how.Over the course of this book, Marshall explores the power of active questions to get us to take responsibility for our actions—and our failure to act. Questions such as “Did I do my best to make progress toward my goal?” “Did I work hard at being fully engaged?” He discusses the importance of structure in effecting permanent change. Because, he points out, change is hard, and without a structure to keep us on track, we inevitably relapse and fall back.Filled with illuminating stories from Marshall’s work with some of the most accomplished executives and leaders in America, Triggers shows readers how to achieve meaningful and sustained change that will allow us to open our imaginations and escape the rigidity of binary thinking.

Making Marriage Simple: Ten Truths for Changing the Relationship You Have into the One You Want


Harville Hendrix - 2013
    Welcome to the Relationship Revolution! "Making Marriage Simple "is the accessible, essential road map to building a strong marriage in the modern world. Bestselling authors Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt distill into ten essential truths what they've learned about how to create a successful and satisfying relationship--both from their decades of "R&D" in the marriage lab of their workshops, and from their own relationship journey. In each chapter, Harville and Helen introduce a simple truth--such as "a frustration is a wish in disguise," "incompatibility is grounds for marriage," or "conflict is growth trying to happen"--and then walk couples through easy yet effective exercises to help them apply each truth in real life, every day. Harville and Helen have spent their careers helping couples transform their marriages through research, workshops, and counseling. But marriage--even for marriage experts--is never easy, and a number of years ago they found themselves on the brink of divorce. Harville and Helen put themselves back through the exercises they'd coached so many other couples through, saving their marriage and helping them achieve a true partnership. This book is for all couples. It offers the practical tools needed to transform one's relationship into a rewarding and joyous marriage. Written with humor, compassion, and honesty, and illustrated throughout with engaging line drawings, "Making Marriage Simple "is a strategic blueprint for creating a stronger, more satisfying partnership in today's world.

Facing Codependence: What it is, where it comes from, how it sabotages our lives


Pia Mellody - 2020
    

How To Break Up With Friends: From Friendshit to Friendsplit – a guide to ditching crappy companions


Hannah Korrel - 2020
      The one who expects the world, but never remembers your birthday. The one who constantly ditches your dinner plans when you’re already halfway to the restaurant. The one who leaves you feeling exhausted, used and completely emotionally battered.   Why do we let these people into our lives? When is their friendship actually friend-shit? How do we dump these crappy companions?   This is the no-bullshit, essential guide for anyone devoting their precious time and energy into maintaining friendships with toxic friends. Using activities, truth bombs, and real-life examples, neuropscyhologist Dr Hannah Korrel will help you to identify the bad friends in your life, understand what true friendship should look like, learn how to attract the best people, and become the best friend you can be yourself.   Provocative, funny, and brutally honest, How To Break Up With Friends will change the way you look at friendship forever.

Brain Rules: 12 Principles for Surviving and Thriving at Work, Home, and School


John Medina - 2008
    Yet brain scientists have uncovered details every business leader, parent, and teacher should know—like the need for physical activity to get your brain working its best.How do we learn? What exactly do sleep and stress do to our brains? Why is multi-tasking a myth? Why is it so easy to forget—and so important to repeat new knowledge? Is it true that men and women have different brains?In Brain Rules, Dr. John Medina, a molecular biologist, shares his lifelong interest in how the brain sciences might influence the way we teach our children and the way we work. In each chapter, he describes a brain rule—what scientists know for sure about how our brains work—and then offers transformative ideas for our daily lives.Medina’s fascinating stories and infectious sense of humor breathe life into brain science. You’ll learn why Michael Jordan was no good at baseball. You’ll peer over a surgeon’s shoulder as he proves that most of us have a Jennifer Aniston neuron. You’ll meet a boy who has an amazing memory for music but can’t tie his own shoes.You will discover how:Every brain is wired differentlyExercise improves cognitionWe are designed to never stop learning and exploringMemories are volatileSleep is powerfully linked with the ability to learnVision trumps all of the other sensesStress changes the way we learnIn the end, you’ll understand how your brain really works—and how to get the most out of it.

Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life


Nir Eyal - 2019
    Later, as you're about to get back to work, a colleague taps you on the shoulder to chat. At home, screens get in the way of quality time with your family. Another day goes by, and once again, your most important personal and professional goals are put on hold.  What would be possible if you followed through on your best intentions? What could you accomplish if you could stay focused and overcome distractions? What if you had the power to become "indistractable"?  International best-selling author, former Stanford lecturer, and behavioral design expert, Nir Eyal, wrote Silicon Valley's handbook for making technology habit-forming. Five years after publishing Hooked, Eyal reveals distraction's Achilles' heel in his groundbreaking new book.  In Indistractable, Eyal reveals the hidden psychology driving us to distraction. He describes why solving the problem is not as simple as swearing off our devices: Abstinence is impractical and often makes us want more.  Eyal lays bare the secret of finally doing what you say you will do with a four-step, research-backed model. Indistractable reveals the key to getting the best out of technology, without letting it get the best of us.  Inside, Eyal overturns conventional wisdom and reveals: Why distraction at work is a symptom of a dysfunctional company culture - and how to fix it  What really drives human behavior and why "time management is pain management"  Why your relationships (and your sex life) depend on you becoming indistractable  How to raise indistractable children in an increasingly distracting world Empowering and optimistic, Indistractable provides practical, novel techniques to control your time and attention - helping you live the life you really want.