100% of author profits from this edition of the book will go to The Trussel Trust, a charity that supports 1,200 UK food banks and provides emergency food and support to people locked in poverty, people who need help more than ever at this time.

    After all, what’s he going to be able to do about it? He’s just this guy, stuck in a small town, pinned there by a load of student debt and a stalled writing career. Oh, and a wicked case of writer’s block.Or at least he was, until a dragon showed up in his bedroom. At midnight. Quoting Freud and muttering about the space-time continuum.So of course, Ian must Make a Choice and decide whether he wants to follow the dragon back into the Connectome and find his muse again, or stay in a house that surely wants to kill him, one repair bill at a time.Follow Ian on a rollicking adventure, where he finds out that he can make a difference. And that some things are worth fighting for.Even if all you have is a can opener.

    (Can supply own time travel machine if required.)When Horace Tweed places an advertisement in a national magazine, the last thing he expects is to be commissioned to travel back through time in search of the long extinct Holey* Snail.But this isn’t just any old snail. The helix pertusa is possessed of an extraordinary and highly desirable property, and Horace’s quest leads him and his co-adventurers to Ancient Greece and a variety of near-death encounters with beings both mythological and not so mythological.Meanwhile, Detective Chief Inspector Harper Collins has her hands full trying to track down a secret order of fundamentalist monks whom she suspects of committing a series of murders – the same monks who are determined to thwart Horace in his... ...Quest for the Holey Snail. (* This isn’t a spelling mistake. The Holey Snail is so called because there are hundreds of tiny holes all over its shell.)PLEASE NOTE: Quest for the Holey Snail is not part of Rob Johnson’s Lifting the Lid series.

    Over half of Earth's population has emigrated to live and work on alien worlds and orbitals, and humanity now aspires to that signature vessel of advanced species, a jump-capable colony ship equipped to support millions of pioneers on the search for a new world. With trillions of creds at stake, are humans doomed to repeat the mistakes that led to Earth's first galactic bail-out? Or might a more experienced investigative journalist look for fraud closer to home?Join the intrepid reporters of the Galactic Free Press, a senior EarthCent Intelligence agent, and an independent trader, as they try to make a living and do their best for humanity with a little help from alien friends. Freelance On The Galactic Tunnel Network is a standalone novel that is the twentieth book in the EarthCent Ambassador / EarthCent Universe sequence, and can be read without starting back to the beginning.

    The gods were supposed to preside over Creation with unmatched wisdom and knowledge. Well, that was the idea. But what is Death – a god of terrible majesty and splendour – supposed to do when his daughter asks for a pony? Is he really supposed to just go out and get a mortal one? Like that’s going to work. It’ll keel over and die in a couple of decades. No, his daughter deserves something better, a pony truly worthy of her divine heritage, which means he’s going to have to get a little bit creative. And then there’s Bureaucracy. The Supreme Mother and Supreme Father might have given rise to Creation, but Bureaucracy is the one who has to keep everything running smoothly. But that’s easier said than done when there are hundreds of gods and countless mortals to consider – none of whom understand the importance of filing paperwork in triplicate. Luckily, not even gods can escape the awesome power of divine paperwork. And let’s not forget gods like Mayhem, Mischief, and Rabble. Their names speak for themselves. When the three of them take a holiday in the mortal world at the same time, trouble is right around the corner. Divine Assistance is a collection of fourteen short stories about the gods and their attempts to manage Creation. There are souls to claim, mortals to woo, and even the occasional city to smite. After all, what’s life without a little divine assistance?

    

    It's a far cry from the heady days when he led his band, The Shooting Tsars, to the top of the charts and sell-out tours and festivals around the world.An unwelcome phone call from his deceitful ex-manager, Chas Dupont, sets in motion a chain of events that seems unstoppable.Can Will get his fractured band back together and rediscover his mojo? Are Chas Dupont's motives purely altruistic? Who are the musical mafia? And are the legendary rumours about the lost "Bloom Tape" true?

    When the system begins to misfire under the workload, the ill-equipped representatives of God and the Devil tasked with managing the process are given an ultimatum. Fix The Afternet or go back to your previous afterlives. They begin an odyssey through the hordes of souls awaiting judgement and the oblivious living in search of a solution. Rich in comic detail and populated with characters real and imagined from throughout time, their quest is never going to be straightforward…

    My Man Jeeves 1919Right Ho, Jeeves 1922Death At The Excelsior, Others 1914

    The novel has been filmed with Pauline Collins as Mrs Caldicot and John Alderton as the nursing home owner. This is the first Mrs Caldicot novel. (The second, which continues the story, is Mrs Caldicot's Knickerbocker Glory.) Both book and film have been widely praised. The Times described it as `Funny and poignant'. The Daily Express called it a `fairytale comedy'. The Daily Telegraph called it `Funny and poignant and socially relevant'. Cinema audiences stood and cheered at the end when the film was shown. The first of the books and films to see life through the eyes of the older citizen. `Mrs Caldicot's Cabbage War made me laugh out loud. Dr Coleman's lightness of touch and direct prose are all that one could wish for.' - Maxwell Craven in the Derby Evening Telegraph `Vernon Coleman really captures the personality of Mrs Caldicot. You'll be hooked and won't be able to put it down.' - Newton Abbott & Mid Devon `Understated British classic.' - Express and Echo `Funny and thought provoking novel.' - Western Morning News 'Funny and poignant...about a woman who decides to fight back, transforming the lives of those around her.' - The Times '...typically understated British classic.' - Express & Echo 'Humour, pathos and sympathy.' -Evening standard 'Witty, poignant and beautifully written' - Western Mail '...a little British comedy with a big heart.' Financial Times The author, Vernon Coleman, is a qualified doctor who has written over 100 books - many of which have appeared on bestseller lists. His books have sold over two million hardback and paperback copies in the UK and been translated into 24 languages. There is a list of his other novels on his Amazon author site. Bestselling non-fiction books include Bodypower. He is also the author of How to Stop Your Doctor Killing You. What the papers say about Vernon Coleman: Coleman is a very funny writer - This England Vernon Coleman writes brilliant books - The Good Book Guide No thinking person can ignore him - The Ecologist A godsend - Daily Telegraph Superstar - Independent on Sunday Compulsive reading - The Guardian His message is important - The Economist His advice is optimistic and enthusiastic - British Medical Journal The man is a national treasure - What doctors don't tell you Its impossible not to be impressed - Western Daily Press Outspoken and alert - Sunday Express Marvellously succinct, refreshingly sensible - The Spectator Probably one of the most brilliant men alive today - Irish Times King of the media docs - The Independent Britain's leading medical author - The Star Britain's leading health care campaigner - The Sun The patients' champion - Birmingham Post The doctor who dares to speak his mind - Oxford Mail He writes lucidly and wittily - Good Housekeeping etc etc

    It also happens to sit on a weak point in the space time continuum. Which is somewhat unfortunate for Ian Faulkener, a graphic novelist from London, who was hoping for some peace and quiet in which to recuperate following a very messy breakdown. It was the cats that first alerted Ian to the fact that something was not quite right with Tinker's Cottage. Not only was he never sure just how many of them there actually were, but the mysterious way they seemed to disappear and reappear defied logic. The cats, and of course the Pope, disappearing literary agents, mislaid handymen and the insanity of Cherie Blair World. As Ian tries to untangle the mystery of the doors of Tinker's cottage he risks becoming lost forever in the myriad alternate universes predicted by Schrodinger. Not to mention his cats. Schrodinger's Cottage is a playful romp through a variety of alternate worlds peopled by an array of wonderful comic characters that are the trademark of David Luddington's novels. For fans of the sadly missed Douglas Adams, Schrodinger's Cottage will be a welcome addition to their library. A heart-warming comedy with touches of inspired lunacy that pays homage to The Hitchhiker's Guide whilst firmly treading its own path.

    Gary Handler has issues. His boss hates him, his mother hounds him, and his cat thinks he’s an idiot. But that’s okay because Gary’s got the perfect solution to all of life’s troubles: a porn site subscription and his right hand.Sadly, all habits grow old, even the fun ones. Gary soon finds himself at the doorstep of a creepy old pawn shop where he buys a used adult novelty toy to spice up his one-man sex life.Pity for him that it’s cursed by the angry spirits of all the “kids” he’s flushed down the toilet. Needless to say, hairy palms are about to become the least of his worries.----------Jack on, jack off ... with the Jacklight in book 2 of Shingles, the horror comedy series that’s not for those with faint hearts or weak bladders.

    1965.  War's found himself deep in the glamorous yet lethal world of international espionage. Unhappy with both the treachery and restrictive dress-code, when a name from the past reappears in his life War realises he must risk everything to keep the world safe once again. This short story follows on from the How To Be Dead series and continues the tale of everybody's favourite grumpy Horseman of the Apocalypse...  What Amazon readers are saying about the How To Be Dead Comedy Fantasy Series: ★★★★★ “Dave Turner is a funny man and ‘How To Be Dead’ is a brilliant read.”★★★★★ “If Neil Gaiman and Simon Pegg sat down to write a story together they might come up with something like this.”★★★★★ “Hilarious and unexpectedly moving.”★★★★★ "Laughs and excitement combined!"★★★★★ “Laugh out loud funny… It’s been a while since an author has made me laugh more than Pratchett does.”★★★★★ "If you like Tom Holt, Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett, Dave Turner's books will fit perfectly into your collection."

    Okay yes, all that stuff too, but I'm not talking about that right now. The government has also been lying to us about space aliens. Aliens have landed on the National Mall and are asking to speak with the President of the United States. For the sake of the planet, diplomat Michael Wallenson is tasked with keeping them away from Donald Trump at all costs. Will Michael succeed? Or will these heavily armed, easily offended aliens succeed in reaching our leader? Building the border dome, coal-powered missiles, and the true identities of the men in black - all in Take Us To Your Trump, another hilarious satirical comedy from author Andrew Stanek.

    Wake his kid brother Andy up, get tormented on the school bus by the cool kids, try to avoid them while in school. Except it's Field Trip Day to the Science Museum, and now he's stuck with the meanest kids in seventh grade all day! But then the bus breaks down, so he doesn't even get to do anything cool at the science museum. It's okay, because an industrial accident brings science to Todd and his friends in the form of a zombie apocalypse. When the bus driver abandons them in the middle of a zombie outbreak, Todd, his brother Andy, his best friend Tarik, and their tomboy friend Mikayla take shelter in the first place they can find - an adult novelty store. What can you find in an adult toy store to fight zombies? Well…let's just say that the field trip was pretty educational, even if the kids never made it to the museum! Shingles is the comedy horror series from the gang that brings you the Authors & Dragons podcast. Like the podcast, these books are rated Not Safe For Anything.