In this hilarious book of tongue-in-cheek poetry, the author of the internationally syndicated comic strip Sally Forth helps cats unlock their creative potential and explain their odd behaviour to ignorant humans. With titles like Who Is That on Your Lap?, This Is My Chair, Kneel Before Me, Nudge, and Some of My Best Friends Are Dogs, the poems collected in I Could Pee on This perfectly capture the inner workings of the cat psyche. With photos of the cat authors throughout, this whimsical volume reveals kitties at their wackiest, and most exasperating (but always lovable).

    You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.”Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.

    You may find it for free on the web. Purchase of the Kindle edition includes wireless delivery.

    Hooper isn’t content with just any old egg! He uses something extra special for his super-dee-dooper dishes!This delightful book forms part of the second stage in HarperCollins’ major Dr. Seuss rebrand programme. With the relaunch of 10 more titles in August 2003, such all-time favourites as How the Grinch Stole Christmas!, Mr. Brown Can Moo! Can You? and Dr. Seuss’ Sleep Book boast bright new covers that incorporate much needed guidance on reading levels: Blue Back Books are for parents to share with young children, Green Back Books are for budding readers to tackle on their own, and Yellow Back Books are for older, more fluent readers to enjoy. Scrambled Eggs Super! belongs to the Yellow Back Book range.

    In other words, perfect." - The Huffington PostAn amusing and captivating tale that's a delightful primer for laughing at the inevitable: If you're a dinosaur, all of your friends are dead. If you're a pirate, all of your friends have scurvy. If you're a tree, all of your friends are end tables. Each page of this laugh-out-loud, illustrated humor book showcases the downside of being everything from a clown to a cassette tape to a zombie. Cute and dark all at once, this hilarious children's book for adults teaches valuable lessons about life.From the sock whose only friends have gone missing to the houseplant whose friends are being slowly killed by irresponsible plant owners (like you), All My Friends Are Dead presents hilariously entertaining stories about life and existential predicaments.The simple yet effective imagery, the personification of inanimate objects, and short, hilarious quips come together to create an amusing adventure through each character's unique grievance and wide-eyed dilemmas.Written by Avery Monsen, an actor, artist, and writer and Jory John, a writer, editor, and journalist. They are friends, and neither is dead. Yet.All My Friends Are Dead is both the saddest funny book and the funniest sad book you'll ever read.Children's book written for adults Displayed in an accessible cartoon form

    The aim of these editions is to be as close as possible to Beatrix Potter's intentions while benefiting from modern printing and design techniques. The colors and details of the watercolors in the volumes are reproduced more accurately than ever before, and it has now been possible to disguise damage that has affected the artwork over the years. Most notably, The Tale of Peter Rabbit restores six of Potter's original illustrations. Four were sacrificed in 1903 to make space for illustrated endpapers, and two have never been used before. Of course, Beatrix Potter created many memorable children's characters, including Benjamin Bunny, Tom Kitten, Jemima Puddle-duck and Jeremy Fisher. But whatever the tale, both children and adults alike can be delighted by the artistry in Potter's illustrations, while they also enjoy a very good read. Because they have always been completely true to a child's experience, Potter's 23 books continue to endure.

    Rudyard Kipling's dramatic tale, here excerpted from the greater volume of The Jungle Book, is the story of the loyal mongoose, Rikk-Tikki-Tavi, and the lengths to which he must go to protect his adoptive human family.

    As mind-bending as it is delightful, Lewis Carroll’s 1865 novel is pure magic for young and old alike.

    Fairy tales have never been more revolting!

    For the writer, there was something majestic and elemental about these inscrutable creatures he admired, sentient beings whose searing gaze could penetrate deep into our being. Bukowski considered cats to be unique forces of nature, elusive emissaries of beauty and love.On Cats offers Bukowski’s musings on these beloved animals and their toughness and resiliency. He honors them as fighters, hunters, survivors who command awe and respect as they grip tightly onto the world around them: “A cat is only ITSELF, representative of the strong forces of life that won’t let go.”Funny, moving, tough, and caring, On Cats brings together the acclaimed writer’s reflections on these animals he so admired. Bukowski’s cats are fierce and demanding—he captures them stalking their prey; crawling across his typewritten pages; waking him up with claws across the face. But they are also affectionate and giving, sources of inspiration and gentle, insistent care.Poignant yet free of treacle, On Cats is an illuminating portrait of this one-of-a-kind artist and his unique view of the world, witnessed through his relationship with the animals he considered his most profound teachers.

    Birthday: February 18Sex: Female Where she lives: In the house, on the couch, underfootHer favorite pastime: Blogging, sleepingHer best feature: Her toe beans Her favorite food: All of themPusheen is a pleasantly plump cat who has warmed hearts and tickled funny bones of millions worldwide with her signature GIF animated bops, bounces, and tail wiggles. Now, Pusheen is ready to make the leap from digital to print in her first comic collection! Learn what makes her purr and find out why millions of people have already fallen in love with this naughty, adorable kitty. Featuring some of the most popular stories from Pusheen’s Tumblr and Facebook pages (plus a healthy serving of never-before-seen material), I Am Pusheen the Cat is a treat for cat lovers and comics fans alike.

    The owls, hen, larks, and their nests in his beard, are among the fey fauna and peculiar persons inhabiting the uniquely inspired nonsense rhymes and drawings of Lear (20th child of a London stockbroker), whose Book of Nonsense, first published in 1846, stands alone as the ultimate and most loved expression in English of freewheeling, benign, and unconstricted merriment.

    As with all of Wilde's short stories it embodies strong moral values and is told with an effervescence akin to that of the 1001 nights. It is the tale of a lovestruck student who must provide his lover with a red rose in order to win her heart. A nightingale overhearing his lament from a solitary oak tree is filled with sorrow and admiration all at once, and decides to help the poor young man.She journeys through the night seeking the perfect red rose and finally comes across a rambling rose bush but alas, the bush has no roses to offer her. However, there is a way to MAKE a red rose, but with grave consequences. This story can be found freely on many websites:http://www.eastoftheweb.com/short-sto...http://www.literaturepage.com/read/th...http://www.oscarwildecollection.com/

    It's a unique view of how family members react to a calamity and their treatment of each member emphasized by contrasting the dark and inconsiderate nature of humans with the benign and loyal nature of dogs. The story is told from the viewpoint of a dog named Aileen Mavourneen, a self-proclaimed Presbyterian, whose mother is a Collie, and father is a St. Bernard. It begins with her life as a puppy while living with her mother. Eventually, she is taken from her mother to live with a loving family. At first, life for Aileen seems perfect. She lives in a spacious, adorned house with open space where she is free to roam and play with other dogs. All that changes, however, when a fire breaks out in the nursery, prompting Aileen to risk her own life to save her owner’s infant from harm’s way. Despite her heroic deed, Aileen’s motives are misunderstood and she is cruelly beaten and treated with the utmost brutality that changes her life forever. A recommended read that evokes much powerful, heartfelt emotions throughout.

    With keen emotion and fresh vision, the acclaimed artist captures the essence of the tale's timeless appeal: The journey of the awkward little bird -- marching bravely through hecklers, hunters, and cruel seasons -- is an unforgettable survival story; this blooming into a graceful swan is a reminder of the patience often necessary to discover true happiness. Splendid watercolors set in the lush countryside bring drama to life.