Confessions of a Teenage Jesus Jerk


Tony DuShane - 2010
    But Gabe’s not alone: there’s Peter, who writes swear words in the margins of his papers; Jihyun, the Korean kid who subsists on Ho Hos and Doritos; and Camille, who follows Gabe around, trying to be his girlfriend. There’s also Gabe’s mom, who sleeps sixteen hours a day, and his dad, an elder who decides the fate of sinners (like the married couple who confesses to accidentally having anal sex). There’s Brother Miller, an elder with a Napoleon complex, who accompanies Gabe from door to door, encouraging him to knock with confidence, and Sister Feeney, who looks forward to the day she can move into a Spanish-style house after its owner dies at the end of the world. Luckily for Gabe, there is Uncle Jeff, who used to tour with Santana and now gives Gabe the only valuable girl advice he ever receives. It's hard when school days are spent dodging questions about your weird religion and weekends mean preaching house to house. Life looks dreary until Gabe falls for Camille’s beautiful older sister and begins to see her as the answer to his frustrations.

Best of The Bro Code and The Playbook


Matt Kuhn - 2012
    Offered for free by Apple and Touchstone, a trademark of Simon & Schuster Inc., contains selections from the two books mentioned in the title.

The Adventure of the Red-Headed League


Vincent Goodwin - 2010
    Wilsons story seems to contain nothing more than an unusual position for a red-headed man. But to Holmes, theres a crime in action! Can Holmes solve the case and catch the crook before it is too late? Follow the clues with Sherlock Holmes in the adventure of the Red-Headed League!

Amongst the Liberal Elite: The Road Trip Exploring Societal Inequities Solidified by Trump (Resist)


Elly Lonon - 2018
    It takes more than listening to NPR on our daily commutes and reading Jon Stewart's Twitter feed in bed while we sip craft beer from artisanal glassware made by at-risk women on another continent to make us global citizens. That won't stop this affable, endearing couple from trying, though.Based on the successful McSweeney's column, Amongst the Liberal Elite takes readers on a cross-country road trip with Alex and Michael, romantic partners whose voices will resonate with fans of shows such as Portlandia, Parks and Recreation, Full Frontal with Samantha Bee, and Last Week Tonight with Jon Oliver. The couple decides to use their tax refund to reconnect with their fellow Americans via a cross-country road trip and, more specifically, better understand how in the world Trump won the election. In a quest to visit The World's Largest Frying Pan--of which there are six in the U.S.-Alex and Michael embark on a journey marked with personal and societal realizations. Arguments about topics ranging from mom-shaming to misogyny related to their pet cat, unsuccessful attempts at yoga meditations in small spaces, and anticlimactic touristic attractions that deepen their gloom about the nation, bring Alex and Michael clarity about what it means to resist. Amongst the Liberal Elite is the political satire we've all been waiting for-the one that offers comic relief from ourselves.

Tales from the Crypt: The Official Archives


Digby Diehl - 1996
    Contains the official biograpy of the Crypt Keeper, a history of EC Horror Comics, 105 covers, and other stories, facts, and features relating to Tale from the Crypt.

Spongebob Squarepants Movie: A Novelization of the Hit Movie!


Marc Cerasini - 2004
    Krabs is held accountable for the crime! So it's up to SpongeBob and his trusty sidekick, Patrick, to make the dangerous trip to Shell City to retrieve the crown and save Mr. Krabs's life. Meanwhile, the evil Plankton has set his plan into motion: to steal the secret Krabby Patty formula and rule the sea! Will SpongeBob and Patrick be able to save the crown "and" make it back in time to save the fate of Bikini Bottom?

Garfield: The Monday That Wouldn't End Original Graphic Novel: The Monday That Wouldn't End


Scott Nickel - 2019
    But this is no ordinary Monday, and the frazzled feline finds himself stuck in a time loop, reliving the agony over and over and over. Can Garfield find a way to end this rotten day or will he be stuck forever? Garfield and the gang are back in an all-new graphic novel with stories written by Scott Nickel and Mark Evanier (Garfield & Friends) and illustrated by series regular Antonio Alfaro and artist Dave Alvarez.

I Am Pusheen the Cat


Claire Belton - 2013
    Birthday: February 18Sex: Female Where she lives: In the house, on the couch, underfootHer favorite pastime: Blogging, sleepingHer best feature: Her toe beans Her favorite food: All of themPusheen is a pleasantly plump cat who has warmed hearts and tickled funny bones of millions worldwide with her signature GIF animated bops, bounces, and tail wiggles. Now, Pusheen is ready to make the leap from digital to print in her first comic collection! Learn what makes her purr and find out why millions of people have already fallen in love with this naughty, adorable kitty. Featuring some of the most popular stories from Pusheen’s Tumblr and Facebook pages (plus a healthy serving of never-before-seen material), I Am Pusheen the Cat is a treat for cat lovers and comics fans alike.

The Roald Dahl Omnibus: Perfect Bedtime Stories for Sleepless Nights


Roald Dahl - 1986
    Bawdy, funny, touching, and downright outrageous, there's simply no one else like Roald Dahl.This volume is a diabolical collection of 28 of Dahl's best stories. Shiver to classics like The Man From the South, Taste, Royal Jelly and The Great Switcheroo and hard-to-find gems like Poison, The Wish and Neck. It's the perfect remedy for a sleepless night. From Someone Like YouTasteLamb to the SlaughterMan from the SouthThe SoldierDip in the PoolGalloping FoxleySkinPoisonWishNeckSound MachineNunc DimittisGreat Automatic GrammatizatorClaud's DogRatcatcherRumminsMr HoddyMr FeaseyFrom Kiss KissLandladyWilliam and MaryThe Way Up to HeavenRoyal JellyGeorgy PorgyGenesis and CatastropheEdward the ConquerorPigChampion of the WorldFrom Switch BitchGreat SwitcherooLast ActBitch

The Authoritative Calvin and Hobbes: A Calvin and Hobbes Treasury


Bill Watterson - 1990
    The author won the 1986 Reuben Award as Outstanding Cartoonist of the Year and has also illustrated Something Under the Bed is Drooling, Calvin and Hobbes' Yukon Ho! and Weirdos From Another Planet.

There's a Hair in My Dirt!: A Worm's Story


Gary Larson - 1998
    It was a cartoon that appeared for many years in daily newspapers and was loved by millions. (And was confusing to millions more.) But one day he stopped.Gary went into hiding. He made a couple short films. He played his guitar. He threw sticks for his dogs. They threw some back.Yet Gary was restless. He couldn't sleep nights. Something haunted him. (Besides Gramps.) Something that would return him to his roots in biology, drawing and dementia--a tale called There's a Hair in My Dirt! A Worm's Story.It begins a few inches underground, when a young worm, during a typical family dinner, discovers there's a hair in his plate of dirt. He becomes rather upset, not just about his tainted meal but about his entire miserable, wormy life. This, in turn, spurs his father to tell him a story--a story to inspire the children of invertebrates everywhere.And so Father Worm describes the saga of a fair young maiden and her adventuresome stroll through her favorite forest, a perambulator's paradise. It is a journey filled with mystery and magic. Or so she thinks.Which is all we'll say for now.What exactly does the maiden encounter?Does Son Worm learn a lesson?More important, does he eat his plate of fresh dirt?Well, you'll have to read to find out, but let's just say the answers are right under your feet.Written and illustrated in a children's storybook style, There's a Hair in My Dirt! A Worm's Story is a twisted take on the difference between our idealized view of Nature and the sometimes cold, hard reality of life for the birds and the bees and the worms (not to mention our own species).Told with his trademark off-kilter humor, this first original non--Far Side book is the unique work of a comic master.Now Larson can finally sleep at night.Question is, will you?(from the back cover)

The Junk-Drawer Corner-Store Front-Porch Blues


John R. Powers - 1992
    At turns hilarious and bittersweet, this novel is destined to be a bookshelf classic.

Hey, Cowgirl, Need a Ride?


Baxter Black - 2005
    When Teddie Arizona, woman of mystery, crawls out of the wreckage of her plane and into their lives with a $5,000,000 secret, things start to get interesting.When T.A.’s “husband,” F. Rank Pantaker, dispatches his henchmen to retrieve the money—and the girl—Lick and Al find themselves trying to outrun the bad guys and protect a damsel in distress. Is T.A. out to cheat her cheatin’ husband, or is she really just trying to stop an illegal scheme cooked up by F. Rank and the infamous Ponce de Crayon, Vegas’s most glamorous tiger tamer? Is she playing Lick—or is it love? Will Al Bean’s cockeyed plan, an able assist from Cody, Lick’s cowboy sidekick, a brigade of old-time rodeo reunioneers, and twenty miles of duct tape be enough to stop F. Rank’s nefarious schemes, reform a career party girl, and change the hearts and minds of ten of the world’s most thrill-seeking billionaires? Can Cody keep Lick from climbing onto raging bull Kamikaze’s back one more time? Can true love triumph over shoot-outs at the not-so-okay corral and close encounters with white tigers? Hey, this is Baxter Black—what do you think? With its colorful cast of characters, rip-roaring humor, and inventive language, this caper will have you riding high long after it gallops to a thunderously satisfying conclusion.

The Teenage Workbook, or, The Passing of an April Shower


Adrian Tan - 1989
    People like Mills & Boon, Bikini Nikki and a hunky Dream Guy named Daniel. People like our old friends Chung Kai, Mui Ee, Kok Sean and Sissy.Theirs is a story of loony turns and unexpected twists, as crazy and unpredictable as the April weather. It is a story about wild cars and mad wives, hot foods and piercing screams. It's a story that's shamelessly frank.Read it to believe it.

The Fountainhead : A Fiftieth Anniversary Celebration


David Kelley - 1993
    Stephen Cox, professor of literatureat the University of California at San Diego, spoke on "The LiteraryAchievement of The Fountainhead" and David Kelley, executive director of TheObjectivist Center, discussed "The Code of the Creator." This commemorativemonograph contains the text of both lectures and other material about AynRand's classic novel.