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Bless This Mess [With Ribbon Mark] by Jay Steele
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The Big Book of Parenting Tweets
Kate Hall - 2014
Jokes? People tell jokes on Twitter? YES, they do. And they are hilarious ... but who wants to sift through the hashtags, RTs and FFs to get to the good stuff? WE GET IT! Parents don’t have time for all that. That’s why the duo behind the illustrated humor blog Science of Parenthood teamed up with Twitter maven Kate Hall of Hall of Tweets to create The Big Book of Parenting Tweets —a laugh-riot collection of more than three-hundred tweetable moments straight from the parenting trenches from the most hysterical comedians on Twitter, who just happen to be parents. Here is just a peek at some of what you’ll find inside:My 4yo is trying to sell my own M&M's back to me. This guy's going places.— @FatherWithTwinsWith my wife away, my children keep asking me for things like meals and bandaids and sympathy, but I don't know where we keep any of that.— @KalvinMacleodShe took 4 y/o to the park & texted "Can I get her ice-cream?"Get her a Heineken for all I care. Free babysitters get to call the shots.— @BunmiLaditanI wish bottles of ibuprofen came with a little prize inside, like maybe a babysitter.— @SuburbanSnapsTo anyone out there thinking about having kids, today my 2yo threw a temper tantrum because she couldn’t get rid of her shadow. — @XplodingUnicornPeppered with cartoons by Science of Parenthood, The Big Book of Parenting Tweets is the perfect gift for every over-worked, under-showered, sleep-deprived parent who could use a quick laugh, because who has time for more?
The Fourteen Infallibles
Sayed Ammar Nakshawani - 2012
Sayed Ammar Nashawani's lectures on the biographies of the fourteen infallible figures in Shi'a Islam.An invaluable resource that represents a Shi'a view of the history of Islam, the Prophet and Imams for the present day audience. This excellent book will be of benefit to many in understanding the true nature of Islam and also illustrate how the illustrious figures as representing and manifesting universal human values that can serve humanity at large
The Ricky Gervais Show - First, Second and Third Seasons
Ricky Gervais - 2006
Publisher's SummaryWere you one of the several people on Earth who didn't catch every historic episode of the most-downloaded podcast ever? Or maybe you treasured every golden moment and want to preserve it for future generations? Now, all 12 episodes of The Ricky Gervais Show: The Complete First Season are here in one package that's far tidier than Karl Pilkington's thought processes.It's more than six hours of Ricky's rants, Steve Merchant's meanderings and Karl's - well, whatever it is that Karl does.
Bunny Buddhism: Hopping Along the Path to Enlightenment
Krista Lester - 2014
Whether you're a fan of cute bunnies or a devotee of the comforting wisdom of Buddhist thought (or both), this delightful and deceptively simple book will offer insights, surprises, and joy. Based on a popular Twitter feed these heartfelt observations have attracted a loyal following.A bunny who is happy and peaceful brings joy wherever he hops.What the bunny mind dwells on, the bunny becomes.Simple things can be extraordinary to the bunny who chooses to see them.One must hop carefully, for every hop has the potential to cause pain.The wise bunny knows the carrot will not hop to him.The wise bunny hops even when the way is unclear.With 500 inspiring entries and 40 adorable illustrations, the book will be a gift, a touchstone, and a gentle guide to hopping along the wise path of life.
Love, Alice: My Life as a Honeymooner
Audrey Meadows - 1994
The book is full of many personal stories never told or published before. 16-page photo insert.
A Notting Hill Christmas
Jon Rance - 2015
One family. A tiny flat in Notting Hill. A beautiful neighbour. A very angry dog. A horny Welshman. An enormous turkey. On the biggest day of the year. What could possibly go wrong? Meet Ben Canterbury, 29, single, lives in a poky flat in Notting Hill with horny Welshman, Rufus. His life has been one disappointment after another. What makes it worse is that his brother, Jamie, is the complete opposite - a Barrister to Ben’s Barista - with a family and a proper house in Twickenham. In an attempt to compete with his perfect brother, Ben insists he hosts the family Christmas, but it isn’t long before he realises he’s way out of his depth. Ben’s flat isn't big enough for everyone (including one very angry dog), the Christmas tree’s from the £1 shop, the decorations are hung with Blu-Tack, and the turkey might not fit in the oven. Ben’s definitely not feeling the Christmas spirit. But when beautiful new neighbour, Mhairi McGregor, appears at his door, Ben’s Christmas worries go out of the window and he begins to wonder if it might not be the worst Christmas in history after all. Amid all the drama, drinking and carnage of Christmas Day, will Ben find true love or will it be another disappointment to add to the list? A Notting Hill Christmas is a brilliantly funny, feel-good, festive novella perfect for fans of romantic comedies like Love Actually and Notting Hill.
Mrs Brown's Family Handbook
Brendan O'Carroll - 2013
Keeping her end up while seven grown-up children tear about the fecking place like the eejits haven't got a home to go to.Packed with Mammy's tips for keeping a perfect family, or at least a family, as well as contributions from her children, neighbours and other hangers on, Mrs Brown's Family Handbook dispenses advice in her own inimical fecking style. You'll learn:• why every mammy's secret weapon is the tea towel• the dos and don't of cleaning up Granddad • what Dermot doesn't know about farting (not much)• what Winnie knows about seks (not enough)• all about the Five-Sausages-A-Day Diet (hint: contains sausages)• from Maria all about pain relief in child birth (if its free, take it)The perfect gift for anyone in a large family - it's one present and cheap - or with no family at all (seeing what they're missing might cheer the miserable feckers up), Mrs Brown's Family Handbook is also ideal for anyone sick and tired of giving out bloody DVDs for Christmas.Brendan O'Carroll is an Irish writer, producer, comedian, actor, director and author. He is best known for playing Agnes Brown in Mrs Brown's Boys, which won the best sitcom BAFTA in 2012. He has written four films and nine comedy shows, including The Course (1995), The Last Wedding (1999) and last year saw the release of his DVD for the live tour Good Mourning Mrs Brown. He has also published seven novels, including The Mammy, The Scrapper and The Young Wan - a number of which have been translated into 12 languages.
Flashbang: How I Got Over Myself
Mark Steele - 2005
His life was turning into a flashbang ? something that makes a lot of noise but leaves no permanent indentation. In this hilarious memoir, Steele gives autobiographical accounts of enduring 40 days of facial paralysis, suffering public embarrassment at a Presidential Inauguration, receiving treatments of shock therapy from a first-timer and giving blood in a Mexican hospital. Each story brings Steele closer to the realization that being a Christian is more than just saying you are. In the end, he reveals his secret to living a more meaningful life?how he got over himself.
Son of Youth in Revolt: The Journals of Scott Twisp(Book 7)
C.D. Payne - 2012
When he wasn’t burning down parts of Berkeley or springing girlfriends from homes for unwed mothers, he was dodging gendarmes in Paris. So what sort of parent would that most outrageous of teenagers make? In this new installment of the acclaimed Twisp saga, 40-something Nick faces the daily trials of dealing with his own teenage son. When a move to California threatens to disrupt young Scott Twisp’s life, he reacts in the true Twispian spirit. Follow this wannabe “wanton lothario” as he conspires to meet the challenges of girls, sex, work, parents, TV stardom, and more. Also returning to complicate matters are Sheeni, Trent, Apurva, Vijay, Jake, Veeva, Uma, and the rest of C.D. Payne’s huge and colorful cast. Enjoy all seven books in the monumental Twisp saga: over a half-million words of hilarious mayhem! Note: Each book in the Nick Twisp series is a self-contained novel that can be enjoyed on its own. Familiarity with the other titles is not required.
The Pranksters Club: The Wimpy Kid Takeover
J.C. Foster - 2014
And how can that get any worse for this Wimpy Kid? By finding out that you’re getting the meanest teacher in the school this year AND she just moved down the street.Leave it up to Connor, Max and Milo to turn the miserable first week of school into the biggest and most exciting party ever. All while avoiding the bully squad, outsmarting Molly, the teacher’s pet and staying one step ahead of Mr. Mooger, the principal.But everything is not as it seems and the three soon find out that they haven’t been the only one’s pulling pranks.Join Connor, Max and Milo on their new adventures in middle school, watch them out smart the bullies and stay one step ahead of the teachers. This illustrated book is a humorous and fun ride through middle school, never knowing what's just around the corner or under your seat. Connor's Diary of the Wimpy Kids in his prankster's club will keep you guessing and laughing out loud.Also Available: The Pranksters' Club: Ripped - Book 2 of the Series
A Christmas at Pasidian Palace
S.L. Morgan - 2016
With peace in their lands, Levi and Reece have been living a life of serenity and peace, raising their three young children at Oxley Manor. Everything seems perfect and well until Levi realizes something: a holiday he knows his wife as always loved on her home planet of Earth has never been celebrated in his realm. In fact, Reece hasn't had the privilege of enjoying her favorite holiday in over six years, and Levi vows to change that. But can he? With his sister's wedding at hand, his own daughter professing her love for another as well, and wanting to have a new holiday introduced to Pemdas...Levi is determined to find a way to make all of this work no matter the sacrifices he must make.
Blue is the Color
Julia Wolf - 2020
Dalia Brenner dislikes him instantly, but she's stuck sleeping three feet away from him all summer on his tour bus.Dalia has plans for her life once this tour is over, and none of them involve being a rock star's girlfriend. Too bad Nick Fletcher disagrees.Watch Me UnravelA second chance romanceDavid Wiesel lives for making music, partying, and women. Sylvia Price lives for her daughter, theater, and teaching.One drunken night when they were teenagers left them irrevocably bound. Fifteen years later, an accident brings them back together and there is no denying the heat that scorched them when they were young is still there, sparking between them.While David is more than willing to stoke those flames, Sylvia is afraid this time, the fire will burn her right to the ground.Such Great HeightsA forbidden friends-to-lovers romanceTo Jasper, Malka is his best friend's on-again, off-again girlfriend. To Malka, Jasper is the squeaky clean bassist in her ex's band.One night fueled by grief and alcohol changes it all. They finally see each other for who they really are and a connection is uncovered between them that can't be denied.Even though it should be, since not denying it could destroy everything.Under the BridgeA quirky slow burn romanceWhen Ian rescues his new next door neighbor, Valentina, he becomes her hero, a title he doesn’t want. The girl, though? He can’t seem to stop wanting her, even though the last thing he’s looking for is a relationship.The trouble is, Valentina is seeking adventure, and the tall, tattooed drummer next door looks like the exact type of adventure she’s been waiting for.
The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe
Conor Lastowka - 2018
So far her only option is an invitation from some upperclassmen to watch them drunkenly race a bunch of bullfrogs in a ditch. To be honest, she was hoping for something a bit more exciting.Her grandfather, Cornelius Everglades, is a renegade who founded his own island micronation. Unfortunately, the rest of the world refuses to acknowledge it (possibly because he’s gone about the nation-building process using wildly illegal and unethical means).When Cornelius shows up at Kara’s door needing her help and promising an adventure, Kara agrees to go along with his far-fetched plan to put his micronation on the map, even though a) she thought Cornelius was dead, and b) his scheme depends heavily on Kara wearing a mascot costume.If Kara had known about the giant alien spaceship currently speeding toward her grandfather’s country with the intent to subjugate and humiliate mankind, she might have reconsidered.
The Afternet
Peter Empringham - 2011
When the system begins to misfire under the workload, the ill-equipped representatives of God and the Devil tasked with managing the process are given an ultimatum. Fix The Afternet or go back to your previous afterlives. They begin an odyssey through the hordes of souls awaiting judgement and the oblivious living in search of a solution. Rich in comic detail and populated with characters real and imagined from throughout time, their quest is never going to be straightforward…