Stirring speeches to rapt juries, triumphant press interviews and enormous fees paid by grateful clients. He can see it all. But unfortunately, he has reckoned without Judge 'Bonkers' Clarke, The Honourable Mr 'Sourpuss' Boniface and a range of other equally terrifying, grumpy and borderline insane judges - not to mention tricky solicitors, bent coppers and dodgy defendants.

    The autobiography of the most troubled footballer of modern times.

    This book was brought to you by the one and only - THE CLOWN FACTORY.

    Gaimon gathers the best of his popular Q&A column—and pokes fun at his younger self.Despite the howling protests from his peers, no one’s ever been more willing to spill the beans on what it’s really like inside the pro cycling peloton than the sarcastic scribe Phil Gaimon. Building on the outrageous success of his hilarious 2014 debut, Pro Cycling on $10 a Day: From Fat Kid to Euro Pro, Gaimon gathers the absolute gems from his monthly Q&A feature column in VeloNews magazine into his new book, Ask a Pro: Deep Thoughts and Unreliable Advice from America’s Foremost Cycling Sage, adding a dose of fresh commentary and even more acerbic and sharp-eyed insights. With six years of material to work with—including his incredible rise into the pro ranks, the devastating loss of his contract for 2015, and his bold return to the Big League—Gaimon covers every possible topic from the team dinner table to the toilet with plenty of stops along the way. Gaimon offers wise-ass (and sometimes earnest) answers to fan questions like: · How much chamois cream should I use?· I’ve started shaving my legs. How can I be accepted by my friends?· What do you do to protect yourself when you know you’re about to crash?· How many bikes does my husband really need?· What’s the best victory celebration? Do you practice yours?· In women’s cycling, what is the proper definition of a pro?· What do you say to someone if they honk or almost hit you?· Do you name your bikes?· What do pros think when they see a recreational cyclist in a full pro kit or riding a pro-level bike?· Can you take your bike apart and put it back together?· How bad does the weather have to be to call off a training ride?· How do you know when it’s time to change a tire?· When you’re in a breakaway all day, do riders form a future friendship?· Riders keep complaining about "unsafe" weather at races. When did pro cyclists turn into such wussies?· How do the pros define a "crash"?Gaimon wields his outsider’s wit to cast a cock-eyed gaze at the peculiar manners, mores, and traditions that make the medieval sport of cycling so irresistible to watch. Ask a Pro includes new resources from Gaimon, too, including his Cookie Map of America, dubious advice on winning the race buffet, a cautionary guide for host housing, Phil’s pre-race warm-up routine, and a celebrity baker’s recipe for The Phil Cookie.

     All the best,Kerry and Kurtanp.s. Kurtan wants to make it clear that although this newsletter is in book format it does not make him any of the following:Book WormBook bummerBoffinNerd alertThe lion, the witch and the book wormp.p.s If you don't buy this newsletter that's fine, but we are getting a percent of the profits to donate to the Kerry Mucklowe eating fund, so if you don't buy it I'll basically starve. Which is fine if your conscience can deal with that utter headf***.

    His characteristically patrician tones, overlaid with those of the bon viveur, have delighted listeners to the BBC's Test Match Special where the personality of the broadcaster comes second only to a deep knowledge of the game and its players. With his engaging conversational tone it is easy to see why listeners feel as if they are actually at the Test match watching in Henry's friendly company. Now that 'Blowers' has decided to declare his TMS innings closed, his book reveals the secrets of life in the commentary box and of the rich cast of characters with whom he shared it, from the early days of John Arlott and Brian Johnson to Aggers and new boys Boycott, Swann, Vaughan and Tuffers. Henry is equally revealing of his own performances and self-deprecatingly recalls his several verbal misfortunes while live broadcasting. Like the greatest commentators and writers on the game Blofeld has always understood that there is a world beyond the cricket field. Not forgetting pigeons passing, red buses and much loved cricket grounds, Henry Blofeld writes of his favourite countries, and experiences while travelling, and meeting and interviewing many cricket-loving celebrities. His passionate and entertaining book will become one of the classics of cricket's literature.

    The novel draws on the author’s trademark staples of humor and wit, supplying readers with honest and at times, shockingly embarrassing tales. The novel provides a been-there-done-that perspective, offering the insights of one who has spent much of her life dealing with the issues she details.Whitney Cummings presents “I’m Fine…And Other Lies” with a strikingly witty and self-deprecating tone, reflecting on her past mistakes and presenting them for the reader to learn and benefit from. Praised for its sincerity and humorous quality, this book aims to entertain as much as it aims to comfort.A Brief Look Inside:EVERY GOOD BOOK CONTAINS A WORLD FAR DEEPER than the surface of its pages. The characters and their world come alive, and the characters and its world still live on. Conversation Starters is peppered with questions designed to bring us beneath the surface of the page and invite us into the world that lives on.These questions can be used to...Create Hours of Conversation:• Promote an atmosphere of discussion for groups• Foster a deeper understanding of the book• Assist in the study of the book, either individually or corporately• Explore unseen realms of the book as never seen beforeDisclaimer: This book you are about to enjoy is an independent resource meant to supplement the original book. If you have not yet read the original book, we encourage doing before purchasing this unofficial Conversation Starters.

    The story takes us from Glenn's unexpected diagnosis of 'three months at best' just days before the birth of his only child, to his miraculous remission and the ironic death of his father. It is a journey that is by turns heartbreaking, painfully funny, misanthropic, loving and ultimately heroic. Rodeo In Joliet tramples the Hallmark cliches and platitudes of traditional cancer survival stories and presents in their place an experience that leaves the reader in awe and grateful for his or her every breath.

    I Don't Care About Your Band posits that lately the worst guys to date are the ones who seem sensitive. It's the jerks in nice guy clothing, not the players in Ed Hardy, who break the hearts of modern girls who grew up in the shadow of feminism, thinking they could have everything, but end up compromising constantly. The cowards, the kidults, the critics, and the contenders: these are the stars of Klausner's memoir about how hard it is to find a man--good or otherwise--when you're a cynical grown-up exiled in the dregs of Guyville. Off the popularity of her New York Times "Modern Love" piece about getting the brush-off from an indie rock musician, I Don't care About Your Band is marbled with the wry strains of Julie Klausner's precocious curmudgeonry and brimming with truths that anyone who's ever been on a date will relate to. Klausner is an expert at landing herself waist-deep in crazy, time and time again, in part because her experience as a comedy writer (Best Week Ever, TV Funhouse on SNL) and sketch comedian from NYC's Upright Citizens Brigade fuels her philosophy of how any scene should unfold, which is, "What? That sounds crazy? Okay, I'll do it." I Don't Care About Your Band charts a distinctly human journey of a strong-willed but vulnerable protagonist who loves men like it's her job, but who's done with guys who know more about love songs than love. Klausner's is a new outlook on dating in a time of pop culture obsession, and she spent her 20's doing personal field research to back up her philosophies. This is the girl's version of High Fidelity. By turns explicit, funny and moving, Klausner's debut shows the evolution of a young woman who endured myriad encounters with the wrong guys, to emerge with real- world wisdom on matters of the heart. I Don't Care About Your Band is Julie Klausner's manifesto, and every one of us can relate.

    After a series of catastrophes, he needed to take drastic measures to restore himself. Opting out of the rat race, he cast himself away to a deserted island off the north-east tip of Australia, as far off the grid as was humanly possible. He has lived there ever since.One annual supermarket shop, a sketchy internet connection and enough ingredients for a home-brew satisfy Dave’s material needs. He catches fish, traps rainwater and cooks on an open fire. For company he tames dingoes, meets with friends from the Aboriginal community 40 kilometres away and entertains drop-ins such as Russell Crowe sailing past on his honeymoon. Then there’s Dave’s running feud with Boxhead, an antisocial saltwater crocodile who just won’t leave him in peace.Between heartbreak and hair-raising adventures, Dave has found happiness on Restoration Island. Brimming with humour, eccentricity and hard-earned wisdom, The Millionaire Castaway will give you a whole new view on life.

    But he was also one of its greatest gentlemen - a class act with heart, fire, wanderlust and a wild streak. Exploding out of Canvey Island in the early 1970s - an age of glam rock, post-hippy folk and pop androgyny - the Feelgoods, with Lee Brilleaux and Wilko Johnson at the helm, charged into London, grabbed the pub rock scene by the throat and sparked a revolutionary new era, proving that you didn't have to be middle class, wearing the 'right clothes' or living in the 'right place' to succeed. Lee Brilleaux: Rock'n'Roll Gentleman, while a totally different work, is a companion of sorts to the hugely popular Wilko Johnson book: Looking Back At Me (also co-authored by Howe). It is the first comprehensive appreciation of Lee Brilleaux and, with its numerous exclusive interviews and previously unseen images, is a book no Dr Feelgood fan would wish to be without.

    In her early 20s, she met Joe Groves – a cattleman, horse breaker, drover and rodeo rider. Mary and Joe fell in love and raised four children while leading an exciting and challenging life on an array of cattle stations.During her 40 years in the outback, Mary faced death, disaster and disappointments with remarkable resilience and stoicism. She learned to operate helicopters, cattle trucks and anything else it took to help keep her family afloat, proving that if you want something badly enough you need tenacity, perseverance and – most importantly – a sense of humour.An earthy tale of love, hope, loss and survival in the outback, Mary tells her story at a lively pace, with one entertaining yarn after another.(from author's website)

    Apart from Richards, 'all of us were eighteen years old, though Botham seemed to have lived a bit longer - or at least more vigorously - than the rest.'In this irresistible memoir of a life lived in cricket, Vic Marks returns to the heady days when Richards and Botham were young men yet to unleash their talents on the world stage while he and Roebuck looked on in awe. After the high-octane dramas of Somerset, playing for England was almost an anti-climax for Marks, who became an unlikely all-rounder in the mercurial side of the 1980s. Moving from the dressing room to the press box, with trenchant observations about the modern game along the way, Original Spin is a charmingly wry, shrewdly observed account of a golden age in cricket.

    He is the only remaining original member of the group since the inception of April Wine in 1969. Goodwyn grew up poor and is the classic “small-town kid makes good” success story. As a young teen, Goodwyn honed his skills, playing in bands such as East Gate Sanctuary and Woody’s Termites. From the very beginning, Goodwyn plotted the course of the band. His unique but classic rock voice gives April Wine a distinct and immediately recognizable sound. Ranging from hard rock classics to soulful ballads, his vocal range and style can really grab a hold of you. His songwriting skills are prolific. He has penned virtually every April Wine song. He has a knack with words and seems to have an ability to write a catchy tune at will. Through the ups and downs and changing faces of the band, the one thing that has remained constant is Myles Goodwyn. Even today and with their latest release and shift in direction, his voice is as strong and apparent as ever. Now in its fourth decade, April Wine continues to charge ahead as one of Canada’s very best rock bands. And as far as rock history goes, Myles Goodwyn is already a living legend (especially in the annals of Canadian rock history), being known as one of the all-time greats.In Just Between You and Me, Goodwyn shares the story of his upbringing, first at home in rural New Brunswick and then in the music business as the lead singer of one of Canada’s most popular bands ever, April Wine.

    Strummer, Jones, Simonon and Headon tell it like it was. Accept no substitutes.The unique story of the Clash, by the Clash. The Clash were a band like no other. Pioneers of punk rock, their incendiary gigs, intelligent songwriting, definitive style and passionate idealism caught the spirit of the times and made them a worldwide phenomenon. Rolling Stone magazine declared London Calling one of the greatest albums of all time, their autobiographical documentary Westway to the World won a Grammy, and their music lives on, influencing emerging bands and exciting new audiences today.This is the only book to be created by the band and is now available as an eBook. The Clash: trendsetters, icons, revolutionaries. One of the most influential bands of their time, they have inspired bookshelves of commentary, but this is the only book to be created by the band themselves. With unprecedented access to the Clash archives and original interviews with band, this publication tells it like it was. The full story from the last gang in town. Strummer, Jones, Simonon and Headon in their own words.Reviews‘One of the greatest bands of all time.' The Edge, U2 'A massive inspiration for me.' Bernard Sumner, Joy Division and New Order 'I adore The Clash.' Pete Townshend, The Who'One of England's greatest bands.' Nick Hornby ‘What could be more fun than a book about The Clash written by The Clash - What makes this tome more worthy than the reams of unofficial Clash literature available is that in it, the band tells their story in their own words - it's packed with little secrets and playful digs - Brilliant.' Short List 'Thrilling - This is a treasure trove of hitherto undiscovered gems. Long overdue.' Classic Rock ''This book is a cracker - crammed with Clash bits and bobs.' The Sunday Times