Both are pretty easy to put off as they're very expensive and tend to wreck your house.' Stand-up comedian Sam Avery (aka the Learner Parent) started his award-winning blog when his twin boys were born. A million nappies, Peppa Pig episodes and a lot less sleep later, he shares all the lows, highs and hilarious in-betweens of his experiences of first-time parenthood in this, his highly anticipated first book. Sam's honest, messy and laugh-out-loud account of trying for a baby (which transpired to be babIES) and figuring out what to do with them once they arrived - right up to the toddler years of talking, walking and tantrum-ing - will have you crying with laughter between your own nappy changes and nursery runs.

    Captained by hirsute woodworker, actor, comedian, and writer Nick Offerman, the shop produces not only fine handcrafted furniture, but also fun stuff—kazoos, baseball bats, ukuleles, even mustache combs.Now Nick and his ragtag crew of champions want to share their experiences of working at the Woodshop, tell you all about their passion for the discipline of woodworking, and teach you how to make a handful of their most popular projects along the way. This book will take readers behind the scenes of the woodshop, both inspiring and teaching them to make their own projects and besotting them with the infectious spirit behind the shop and its complement of dusty wood-elves.In these pages you will find a variety of projects for every skill level, with personal, accessible instructions by the OWS woodworkers themselves; and, what’s more, this tutelage will be augmented by mouth-watering color photos (Nick calls it "wood porn"). You will also find writings by Nick, offering recipes for both comestibles and mirth, humorous essays, odes to his own woodworking heroes, insights into the ethos of woodworking in modern America, and other assorted tomfoolery.Whether you’ve been working in your own shop for years, or if holding this stack of compressed wood pulp is as close as you’ve ever come to milling lumber, or even if you just love Nick Offerman’s brand of bucolic yet worldly wisdom, you’ll find Good Clean Fun full of useful, illuminating, and entertaining information.

    The novel draws on the author’s trademark staples of humor and wit, supplying readers with honest and at times, shockingly embarrassing tales. The novel provides a been-there-done-that perspective, offering the insights of one who has spent much of her life dealing with the issues she details.Whitney Cummings presents “I’m Fine…And Other Lies” with a strikingly witty and self-deprecating tone, reflecting on her past mistakes and presenting them for the reader to learn and benefit from. Praised for its sincerity and humorous quality, this book aims to entertain as much as it aims to comfort.A Brief Look Inside:EVERY GOOD BOOK CONTAINS A WORLD FAR DEEPER than the surface of its pages. The characters and their world come alive, and the characters and its world still live on. Conversation Starters is peppered with questions designed to bring us beneath the surface of the page and invite us into the world that lives on.These questions can be used to...Create Hours of Conversation:• Promote an atmosphere of discussion for groups• Foster a deeper understanding of the book• Assist in the study of the book, either individually or corporately• Explore unseen realms of the book as never seen beforeDisclaimer: This book you are about to enjoy is an independent resource meant to supplement the original book. If you have not yet read the original book, we encourage doing before purchasing this unofficial Conversation Starters.

    In this raffish, hilarious, scathing yet often surprisingly humane collection, Gill applies his unmatched wit to the largest and smallest issues of our time. Whether you're struggling to satisfy your other half, having a crisis over your baldness, don't like your daughter's boyfriend, or need the definitive rules on shorts, leather jackets and man-bags, AA Gill has all the answers - but you'd better brace yourself first.

    Beckoning Fates (book 3):Was I taking this life for granted? Having this amount of power at my age had made me lose some of the sense of rationality I’d had in my former life. No longer a king, no longer tied down by rules and politics, I’d become careless. In this world, my potential was boundless.Though Arthur Leywin would like nothing more than to pursue his studies at the esteemed Xyrus Academy, where he hopes to push his already potent magical abilities to new plateaus and perhaps discover something more about his reincarnation into this world, he finds the politics of the school’s halls even more challenging to navigate than those of the council chambers he once inhabited as King Grey. Arthur faces inept professors, jealous classmates, and an overeager director while fending off the affection of an old friend and the aggression of an old enemy. Then a routine class trip into a low-level dungeon turns out to be anything but, and Arthur discovers something that will change his life forever.Horizon's Edge (book 4):In my past life I hadn’t had anyone I would have given my life to protect. I had that now, but I didn’t have the strength to protect them - not against what was about to come.In another life, Arthur Leywin was a king and no stranger to war. He was not ready, however, to find himself at the heart of a conflict that will reshape his entire new world. Despite his abilities, it seems as if the danger only increases with every discovery he makes. His oldest friend succumbs to a power that may destroy her, a power Arthur gave her. His most constant foe accepts a dark gift to challenge Arthur’s strength, an act that threatens all of Xyrus Academy. How can he keep his family safe if his very presence is the thing that draws danger to them? Can he dispel the specters of war before it is too late?©2016 TurtleMe (P)2020 Podium Publishing

    

    

    Betrayal. Assassination. Rome, 133 b.c. Gaius Marius is back from war in the West. They fought for the peace and prosperity of Rome, but the legions return to find the Eternal City far less peaceful and prosperous than they had hoped. People are starving, homelessness abounds, war after war has overtaxed the legions. And the revolutionary tribune, Tiberius Gracchus, thinks he has a solution for everything. Political parties are developing, the people are up in arms, the senate is enraged. And Tiberius is at the center of it all. Before Marius has a chance to reacclimate to civilian life, he’s thrust into this political upheaval in Rome. His allegiances are put to the test as Rome is almost brought to the brink of civil war. For the first time in the history of the Republic, blood will be shed in the forum.

    (Women who leave wet teaspoons in sugar bowls need not apply)."I haven't woken up with a cup of tea by the bed for seven years. It seems such a small thing but it's one of a thousand things I miss about having someone around to take care of me. I have spent my entire adult life getting things the way I want them and all I want now is someone to give it all up for." Jon RichardsonIs your filing faultless? Your CDs, apostrophes, cutlery all in the right places? Can you eat a biscuit in the correct way? Then Jon Richardson (single for seven years and counting) could be your ideal man.Living alone in a one bedroom flat in Swindon, 27 year old Jon has had far too much time on his hands to think. In fact to obsess. About almost everything. Jon's obsessive compulsive personality disorder has seen him arrange the coins in his pockets in ascending size and colour code his bookshelves. It takes him less than 90 seconds to locate a receipt for a pair of shoes he bought in 1997. Over to the filing cabinet and R for receipts, S for shoes.But Jon doesn't want to be like this, in fact he would quite like to share his life with someone. But who could that someone be? Someone like himself, a quarrelsome perfectionist only with breasts and less body hair? Absolutely not. But who exactly is Jon looking for and where will he find her? Faced with a loveless future filled with his own peculiar quirks and perfectionism, Jon sets about his search for The One. The question is, will he mind her keeping the knives to the left of the forks in the cutlery drawer or organising the CDs by genre and not alphabetically?

    But many don’t know the saga of Kasem’s oldest children and second wife. In 2014, Kasem is dying, and about to leave behind an estate worth up to $100 million. His family goes to war, with both sides accusing the other of going after his money and killing the man who changed American radio. But this battle is only the climax of a tragic and dramatic family feud that began decades before. Bitter Blood: Kasem V Kasem is an exclusive look at what really happened inside this famous family and what drove them to the brink, told through exclusive interviews and archival audio materials.

    It tells you about every aspect of writing, from having an idea to getting the idea out into the world (and getting paid for it too). It covers everything from journalism to screen-writing, from speeches to sketches, from sitcoms to novels. With thirty years' experience as an award-winning script-writer, journalist, author and broadcaster David Quantick is ideally suited, as a writer, to write this definitive writer's guide to writing... everything.

    Chronicling the last few raucous years in American politics, Lithgow takes readers verse by verse through the history of Donald Trump's presidency.- Lampoons the likes of Betsy DeVos, William Barr, Rudy Giuliani, and dozens more.- Illustrated from cover to cover with Lithgow's never-before-seen line drawings.- Draws inspiration from A. A. Milne, Lewis Carroll, Edward Lear, and even Mother Goose.- Great for fans of A Very Stable Genius by Mike Luckovich, Win Bigly: Persuasion in a World Where Facts Don't Matter by Scott Adams, and The Donald J. Trump Presidential Twitter Library by The Daily Show with Trevor Noah.The poems collected in Dumpty draw inspiration from A. A. Milne, Lewis Carroll, Edward Lear, Rodgers and Hammerstein, Mother Goose, and many more. A feat of laugh-out-loud lyrical storytelling, this timely volume is bound to bring joy to poetry lovers, political junkies, and Lithgow fans alike.

    But what of the unseen Alan? For the first time, this famously private man welcomes us into his home and audibly deshrouds himself for a fascinating series of podcasts. Over the course of 18 generously durated episodes, Partridge grants us full and unfettered access to his off-screen life (within reason). In exchange for a series of payments from Audible, he promises an access-all-areas pass to the nooks and crannies of his hinterland, to reveal a wiser, cleverer, more reflective Alan than many of his more vaunted peers have given him credit for. He then sends the resultant podcasts to Audible ensuring they meet the technical specifications laid down in the contract.

    It's impossible not to be bowled over by the ending. Most definitely my favourite celebrity memoir in a long time. Brilliant.' - THE SUN**The hilarious debut from I'm A Celeb star Joel Dommett (Live at the Apollo, 8 Out of 10 Cats, Impractical Jokers), for fans of Joe Lycett, James Acaster and Sarah Millican**As a 17-year-old virgin working . . . for Virgin, Joel Dommett has grand ambitions. Firstly, he is going to swap suburbia for the bright lights of Showbiz. Secondly, he is going to find 'the one' in the first forty people he's going to sleep with.What follows is a series of disastrous romantic encounters, including carpets mistaken for toilets, futile grand gestures and the catfishing to end all catfishing.Featuring genuine teenage diary entries and told in Joel's trademark self-deprecating style, this is the brilliant first book from the UK's most exciting comedian.

    It now has 600,000 to a million page hits daily. Every now and then, Munroe would get emails asking him to arbitrate a science debate. 'My friend and I were arguing about what would happen if a bullet got struck by lightning, and we agreed that you should resolve it . . . ' He liked these questions so much that he started up What If. If your cells suddenly lost the power to divide, how long would you survive? How dangerous is it, really, to be in a swimming pool in a thunderstorm? If we hooked turbines to people exercising in gyms, how much power could we produce? What if everyone only had one soulmate?When (if ever) did the sun go down on the British empire? How fast can you hit a speed bump while driving and live?What would happen if the moon went away?In pursuit of answers, Munroe runs computer simulations, pores over stacks of declassified military research memos, solves differential equations, and consults with nuclear reactor operators. His responses are masterpieces of clarity and hilarity, studded with memorable cartoons and infographics. They often predict the complete annihilation of humankind, or at least a really big explosion. Far more than a book for geeks, WHAT IF: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions explains the laws of science in operation in a way that every intelligent reader will enjoy and feel much the smarter for having read.