In February 2016, desperate to do a physical challenge before my left knee decided the only thing it was good for was a waiting list, I asked my youngest son if he wanted to come for a walk with me. The result was ‘Father, Son and the Pennine Way,’ the story of 5 days and 90 miles on the UK’s toughest national trail. “A great read. It made me laugh out loud – and inspired me to challenge myself.” “I adored this book. It’s incredibly well-written, refreshing, witty and heart-warming.” “One of the funniest, most moving books I’ve read. Move over, Bill Bryson, you have a successor.” Those are just some of the reviews for ‘Father, Son and the Pennine Way.’ ‘Walking Shorts’ contains the stories that explain how I came to invite Alex out for a walk – and what happened afterwards. It’s my journey and – like ‘Pennine Way’ – it’s the story of a father/son relationship. It’s a book you can dip into when you need a laugh, a pick-me-up or some inspiration. It’s a book you can read in bed, on your commute or even on the loo. It’s a book that’ll make you smile, nod in agreement – and think, “Well if he can do that…”

     “You’re about as useful as a windshield wiper on a goat’s butt.” Keep this book handy, someday you’ll be glad you have it. “Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you just be yourself.” Pick any of the many jaw-dropping insults then laugh at the look on your adversary’s face when you whip one out and use it on them. You’ll leave no doubt in their mind that you are a master of sarcastic insults! ADDED BONUS: In addition to the fresh and hilarious insults in this book, you’ll also find great sarcastic observations about life hidden inside this book’s pages, like… “I think the reason so many people have smart phones is because opposites attract!” You’re no idiot, so you need this book to start your new life as the master of sarcastic insults and put-downs! “Hey! Who left the Idiot Box open? Now they're everywhere!”

    Despite her extensive pre-baby research, nothing prepared her for the momentous task of caring for this new little person. Featuring dozens of funny moments like baby's first lunch out to a forensic view of the living room, this charming doodle collection includes 120 two-color illustrations and is the perfect gift for Mother's Day, baby showers, or year-round fun. Also included are a few doodling prompts in the back of the book so moms can doodle their own first-year memories.

    The station manager who hired him was the first to recognize his considerable on-air talent, and helped start what has become a legendary radio career. Often compared to Howard Stern, Carton has hosted a series of highly rated shows, and in 2007 he joined WFAN, where he and Boomer Esiason host an eponymous show every morning for four hours out of a studio in New York City.In this debut book, Carton invites the reader to join him as he recounts tales from his suburban youth, defends his long-held love affair with the New York Jets, reminisces about the shenanigans of some of the highest paid and most celebrated athletes playing today, and reflects on his work as one of radio’s craftiest, most hilarious personalities ever to get behind the microphone.

    He has proudly told "dick jokes for cash" in pretty much every comedy club and festival in Australia, and taken his knob gags international at all the major festivals from Edinburgh to Auckland to Montreal, and graced some of the most famous stages in the world in New York and LA.In 2008 Wil was named GQ's Comedic Talent of the Year, and given an excellent trophy which he immediately misplaced while drunk at the after party.

    From the random braindropping (When you sneeze, all the numbers in your head go up by one.) to favorite oxymorons (holy war, for one), and from questions to ponder (Why are there no B batteries? for instance) to his classic monologue comparing baseball and football, this little book packs in a lot of laughs.

    

    Not a bad recommendation.Danny Simon made his bones in the golden age of TV, on shows like Make Room for Daddy and Sid Caesar’s Show of Shows.Then he taught a legendary comedy writing class in L.A. for many years. A young writer named James Scott Bell took the course, and copious notes. These notes have never before been published. Bell is revealing these comedy secrets now for the first time.This booklet (4500 words) also includes an analysis of a legendary comedy show that Danny Simon had his students study. If you are serious about comedy . . . or if you just want to put more humor in your writing, this booklet will give you the tools. “I loved this booklet! So many great points. Terrific examples too. When I teach comedy, it is so challenging to really outline how to write a joke, all the setup that is involved, all the word play, all the reversals and the word choices. This is so well articulated. I will definitely reference it and promote it when I teach!” – Rene Gutteridge, author of Escapement and Never the BrideJames Scott Bell is one of the #1 bestselling writing coach of Plot & Structure and The Art of War for Writers. He is an award winning thriller author and seminar teacher.

    This book goes through all the miserable people you love to hate. Do you hate morning people? How about the guy who doesn’t wipe the ketchup top after using it? Or people who just don’t care? After all, isn’t hating just another form of caring?It's true: Misery does love company. But what kind of company can you keep if you can't stand anyone? This kind. No matter who they are or what they do that sets you off and gets you going, you'll find 'em inside. From rich people who are dicks to guys named Rich who go by Dick to those who are always cold to people who are just hot, no one is safe. But one thing is certain—everyone will find someone they equally despise. And you're gonna love it, period.

    Half of the essays are brand new, the others are all reworked and rewritten, based on pieces that were originally published in Golf Digest. Often biting, usually cranky, always hilarious and surprising—this is Dan Jenkins at his best, writing about the sport he loves the most.      "I've always wanted to do something for the golfer who has everything. I thought about a suede golf cart, or maybe a pair of cashmere Footjoys. Then I settled on writing this book." So begins Dan Jenkins's latest—and funniest—collection of golf essays. The book consists of thirty-eight essays, all of them, as Dan says in the first essay, are "literally throbbing with opinion."     In this book Dan delves into the greatest rounds of golf he's ever seen; the funniest things said on a golf course; the rivalries on tour and in the press box; the game's most magical moments—and its most absurd. Unplayable Lies is an ode to the game Jenkins loves. But it is Dan Jenkins, so nothing—even the game of golf—can escape his wrath, his critical eye, or his acerbic pen. The best way to describe it is to turn the book over to Mr. Jenkins:      In "Titanic and I"—probably the most hilarious and surprising essay in the book, telling true stories of Titanic Thompson: gambler, golf hustler, accused murderer, legendary storyteller—Dan explains how Titanic would win a wager by saying he could knock a bird off a telephone wire: "Titanic would drop a ball on the ground and take out his four-wood, waggle it, and pretend to aim at the bird on the wire. When some sucker would bet him he couldn't do it, Ti would pull out a gun he carried and shoot the bird off the wire."     In "The Greatest Rounds": "Show me a man who doesn't know what Arnold did in the last round of the '60 U.S. Open at Cherry Hills, and I'll show you a soccer fan in Paraguay."     This is a perfect follow up to His Ownself. It even has an Introduction by Sally Jenkins, one of the country's top sportswriters and Dan's own darling daughter.

    As Johnny Knoxville so succinctly put it, Nieratko is an asshole, but whether Chris is rescuing a stalker from choking on her own vomit, getting his nose broken for having AIDS (he doesn't) or marrying the one woman that could put up with his insanity, his life sounds so much like a collection of hilarious bar stories it's impossible not to grab a beer and listen to the whole thing.

    With humor, compassion, and lots of love, Jill Angie delivers the goods: overcoming the challenges of running with an overweight body and giving individuals’ self-esteem an enormous boost in the process. This isn't a guide to running for weight loss, or a simple running plan. It shows readers how a woman carrying a few (or many) extra pounds can successfully become a runner in the body she has right now. Jill Angie is a certified running coach and personal trainer who wants to live in a world where everyone is free to feel fit and fabulous at any size. She started the Not Your Average Runner movement in 2013 to show that runners come in all shapes, sizes and speeds, and, since then, has assembled a global community of revolutionaries that are taking the running world by storm. If you would like to be part of the revolution, flip to the inside and find out more!

    Since ours is the only guidebook that's official, this book includes the most accurate information on prices, changes, and new attractions for 2014: --As the pixie dust settles on the newly-expanded Fantasyland, Birnbaum describes everything this Magic Kingdom neighborhood has to offer, including the highly-anticipated Seven Dwarfs Mine Train coaster-an E-Ticket attraction for the whole family.--Can't get enough of the Disney characters? We'll help you find them. A great place to start is at the brand-new Pete's Silly Sideshow, where you can mingle with circus stars Minnie Magnifique, Madame Daisy Fortuna, The Great Goofini, and The Astounding Donaldo!--There's no doubt about it: Fastpass really does cut the time spent waiting in line for the most popular theme park attractions. We give the scoop on this free system and list all the attractions that offer this golden opportunity to skip the standby line.--Big doin's at the Grand Floridian resort! The old favorite has new rooms (courtesy of the Disney Vacation Club), a refreshed (and refreshing) state-of-the-art spa, a splashy new Alice In Wonderland-themed "sprayground," and more. Turn to Birnbaum for the full report.--With or without the Disney Dining Plan, you still need to pre-book those meals or risk missing out on your family's favorites. Birnbaum explains the WDW reservation system, along with descriptions of each and every eatery on property. There's also a handy chart detailing all the opportunities there are to dine with Disney characters and a Restaurant Round-up highlighting the best cuisine the World has to offer.--More money-saving coupon offers than ever before, all geared to help you stretch your Walt Disney World vacation dollar.--And a very special Birnbaum exclusive: A brand-new Kingdom Keepers Quest from bestselling author Ridley Pearson.

    When he came back, he was changed forever.A successful airline pilot and businessman, Jim had it all—a loving family, substantial wealth, and all of the good things that come with it. But none of this was enough to satisfy the emptiness he felt in his heart. He always hungered for something more. And then one day, he died.Jim was never a religious man. When it came to matters of God and faith, he was ambivalent. But as he lay in the hospital bed, clinically dead for more than 11 hours, his consciousness was transported to the wonders of Heaven and the horrors of hell. When he returned to this world, he brought back the missing piece his soul had been longing for. Join Jim Woodford on this unforgettable journey into the afterlife! Awaken to the vivid sights, sounds and sensations that you can enjoy in Heaven forever. Be inspired by detailed descriptions of the “contrails of prayer” in Heaven’s skies, the “sticky love” of God, what it feels like to hug an angel, and more! Encounter the chilling realities of hell, and the sharp claws of destruction that threatened to pull Jim into eternal darkness. Take comfort in the “six simple words” that led Jim into the Presence of Christ Whether you need hope for tomorrow or strength for today, this story is your invitation to a radical transformation!

    The second addition to the Clients From Hell series taps freelance veterans for even more material. Interviews, resources, and particularly poignant tales of client insanity are all included alongside the fan-favourite anecdotes of freelancing dysfunction.For the first time, Clients From Hell takes a step back from finger-pointing and clever name-calling to inform the audience of how to make it as a creative professional. Step one: buy this book. Step two: take heed of these cautionary tales. Step three: we haven't thought of a step three yet. We'll worry about that when revisions come around.Anyone who has ever worked with clients may find these tales frighteningly familiar. New freelancers may think twice about their chosen profession - or at least find relief in the fact that they're not alone in absurd client interactions.And the rest of you? You can just laugh and enjoy your day job.