He’s tripping out of his head on peyote. And someone seems to have made a half-assed attempt at slashing his throat. He can’t for the life of him remember what happened. And then it all comes back: His boys screwed him over.Bailey, college dropout and carny, was working props and rigging for a touring tent circus and freak show. The Freaks were the nastiest, most tweaked-out group of misfits Bailey had ever come across. But the Freaks were doing some shady bookkeeping in addition to a boatload of veterinary Quaalude and crystal meth. So to get the inside dope on the circus payroll, Bailey took up with Eelie, the Serpent Girl, and began an unexpectedly erotic and dangerous odyssey. As Bailey hits the road to track down his “friends” and get his loot back, a black-edged, hilarious caper unfolds. From Tank Deerflower, the drug-dealing rodeo rider, and Arnold, the fire-eater with a temper as black as his charred throat, to Sissy, the beautiful ex-junkie/whore who steals Bailey’s heart, strange characters and stranger events converge in this fast, gritty, and unforgettable novel. Crafted with artistry and deftness, Serpent Girl is a voyage into the darkest depths of carny life–and, remarkably, a tender love story to boot.From the Hardcover edition.

    Sleep — “The best 18 hours of my day”Coffee — “Mother Nature’s Jumper Cables”Dogs — “They contain 90% of the world’s drool supply.”Love — “”…is splitting the last piece of pizza.”Exercise — “My favorite spectator sport.”Mondays — “The armpit of days.”Golf — “That’s Scottish for ‘AAARGH!’.”

    Open at your own risk. Sarah and Tommy have the same kinds of problems as most any ten-year-old girl and six-year-old boy. Homework, bullies, Dad not going in to work since Mom ran off to fuck the postman. That sort of thing. But they're not going to take their problems lying down. After a quick bus ride into town to buy a gun, they think their problems are all but solved. That is, until a creepy weirdo follows them into an alley. But they aren't the only ones in that alley. What they discover will make you soil your pants in terror. It will make your skin crawl. It might even give you... Shingles.

    The gang are furious, but then they learn the intruder is in big trouble and needs their help. Can the Seven come to the rescue ...?These timeless stories are perfect for young fans of mystery, adventure or detective series.

    His stable is a matchbox with a tic-tac box conservatory and with a cocktail stick, some cotton and a hawthorn berry, Tim can play swingball.

    And it is Modi-led India that has this high honour. Prime Minister Modi rolls out the red carpet for the aliens. He receives them at the airport, shows them the sights in Delhi and convinces them to invest in the Make in India campaign. The leader of the alien delegation even holds a broom to promote Swachh Bharat. But what is the real reason the aliens have come to India? Are they friends? Or will they turn foes? Read this hilarious, rib-tickling novel from the author of Unreal Elections to find out.

    In this first volume of his misadventures, Gussett sets his sights on the most prestigious prize in golf, the petrified middle finger of St. Andrew, patron saint of Scotland. Presiding over the world's most cantankerous golf club, Gussett must motivate his members through battles with incontinence, single malt Scotch, and a litany of other unmentionable afflictions in a friendly competition with their ancient rivals, the notorious McGregor clan. Anyone who loves the game or knows someone who does will be unable to resist Feherty's hilarious storytelling and golfing gravitas.

    Specially selected traditional tales, such as Little Red Riding Hood and The Ugly Duckling, combine with wonderful, original stories to make an ebook that is sure to be kept and treasured.

    This collection includes 8 traditional British mystery novels: A COIN OF EDWARD VII THE SOLITARY FARM HAGAR OF THE PAWN-SHOP RED MONEY THE BISHOP'S SECRET THE GREEN MUMMY THE MYSTERY OF A HANSOM CAB THE MYSTERY QUEEN

    Now, he’s being pursued by a homicidal interstellar tourist board, and calculating insurance dividends is as outdated as making stone axes. Sci-fi-hating technophobe Colin embarks on a desperate struggle to find a cure for his illness, as well as a place for himself in this strange new galaxy where toilets talk back, and door handles are a long-forgotten relic. Only by teaming up with his rescuer, hard-boiled, space-traveling archaeologist Tyresa Jak (that’s Doctor Jak to you), can Colin hope to succeed before time runs out. Along the way, this galactic odd-couple must evade the Erd Tourist Board - a powerful mega-corporation which will do anything to ensure the mythical Earth stays mythical - and deal with a crackpot religious cult who not only possess a cure for Colin’s illness, but who also believe there is more to this caveman from Earth than meets the eye.... Don't miss the start of this side-splitting intergalactic adventure that will keep you laughing into the night. It's perfect for fans of Guardians of the Galaxy, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and Space Team. Also available on Audible, narrated by Steve West.

    Foxworthy's runaway bestseller, with more than one million copies in print.

    Ritwik's amazing love story starts with a drab bus journey from Meerut to Delhi, until he meets Shubhangi and falls head over heels in love. Determined to marry Shubhangi, Ritwik goes all out to impress his prospective father-in-law, but only ends up messing his personal and professional life. Will he win the biggest gamble of his life by risking his career and embarking on a wild goose chase simply to appease the eccentric professor? With the odds stacked against him, Ritwik, a born loser is hoping for the Law of Averages to finally catch up with him.Get set to enjoy this romantic, funny, whimsical and outrightly crazy journey undertaken by Ritwik to win the love of his life!

    There are over 100 super-funny and hilarious knock knock jokes created to make you laugh! Over 100 knock knock jokes Excellent for early readers Fun for kids, teens, or adults From the book... Knock knock!Who’s there?Manny!Manny who?Manny times I have knocked on this door!Knock knock!Who’s there?Aitch!Aitch who?Bless You!Knock knock!Who’s there?Boo!Boo who?Don’t cry. It’s just a joke!Comedy, humor, and joke-telling have many positive benefits associated with it. Jokes can bring a smile to the face of others and put you in a great mood! Here are a few more benefits associated with joke-telling: Help you bond with friends and family Lighten tense situations Help you make friends Great conversation starters Perfect for texts and status updates Scroll up and click buy to start laughing today!

    

     Dave Brookman’s new next-door neighbour is ruining his life. Because in a bizarre coincidence, he’s also called Dave Brookman, he’s the same age and he even grew up in the same town. There is one big difference, though. This new Dave is vastly more successful in every way. As Dave starts questioning everything about himself, suddenly his perfect life seems a lot less than perfect. And what starts as friendly rivalry soon turns into obsessive jealousy and crazy behaviour that could see Dave lose it all. Can he get a grip before it’s too late? NetGalley previews: It’s Keeping Up With The Jones in a book!!! Read it!! You will love every page like I did. Amazing job!! This is my third Alastair Puddick story and still I’m impressed. I really care about his antiheroes, flawed characters that for some reason or other - usually their inner-self struggle with what the world throws at them. After George Thring and Freddie Winters, this time it’s all about Dave Brookman. We meet Dave and his family at the point when his new neighbour moves in, by some twisted fate also called Dave Brookman. Neighbour-Dave and his family are seemingly all that our Dave aspires to: ace career, big bucks, flashy cars, great hair, gorgeous wife - the kind of uber-Joneses that bring Dave’s world crashing down into a smouldering heap. This, to me, is the most agonising, personal, gut-wrenching, heartfelt of Puddick’s novels to date. A self-imposed ego inferno, but surely there is hope for Dave? I read this in a day and thoroughly enjoyed it! Dave Brookman’s life is great, he has a lovely wife and 2 children and a career he is good at. This all changes when he gets a new neighbour, also called Dave Brookman, who seems to be doing considerably better in life than the original. Original Dave made me laugh and at times feel really frustrated with him, I quite identified with his wife throughout! Though this is an easy, funny read, this book does make you stop and consider our constant need to compare ourselves to others and measure ourselves against self imposed factors. I’ll be going to read the author’s other books right away. A witty and unique take on the the literary doppelgänger archetype that questions the constant need of human beings to constantly compare themselves to other, to measure themselves against self-imposed factors. Alastair Puddick's novel makes you reflect on the human truth of comparing their self with everybody else, all the while offering a humorous novel that will give you a good time!