Everything Is Going to Kill Everybody: The Terrifyingly Real Ways the World Wants You Dead


Robert Brockway - 2010
    . . Everything Is Going to Kill Everybody is bringing panic back. Twenty illustrated, hilariously fear-inducing 
essays reveal the chilling and very real experiments, dangerous emerging technologies, and terrifying natural disasters that soon could—or very nearly already did—bring about the end of humanity. In short, everything in here will kill you and everyone you love. At any moment. And nobody’s told you about it—until now: •   Experiments in green energy like the HiPER, which uses massive lasers to create a tiny “contained” sun; it’s an idea that could save the world if it doesn’t consume us all in a fiery fusion reaction first. •   Global disasters like the hypercane—a hurricane so large it could cover all of North America and shoot trailer parks into space!•   Terrifying new developments in robotics like the EATR, which powers itself on meat—an invention in the running for “Worst Decision Made by Anybody.”

Murder, Interrupted


James Patterson - 2018
    Rich, cheating financier Frank Howard wants his wife dead, and he's willing to pay Billie Earl Johnson whatever it takes, to the tune of $750,000. When his bullet misses the mark, Billie Earl and Frank will turn on each other in a fight for their lives . . . MOTHER OF ALL MURDERS. Dee Dee Blancharde is a local celebrity. Television reports praise her as a single mother who tirelessly cares for her wheelchair-bound, chronically ill daughter. But when the teenaged Gypsy Rose realizes she isn't actually sick and Dee Dee has lied all these years, Gypsy Rose exacts her revenge . . .

The Short Reign of Pippin IV


John Steinbeck - 1957
    Enchanting comedy ensues as Steinbeck creates the most hilarious royal court ever around the brief, bold reign of the corduroy-clad Pippin, his social-climbing wife Maria, his star-struck daughter Clotilde and her Californian beau, Todd.

Mommywood


Tori Spelling - 2009
    Tori Spelling might have grown up with everything a girl could wish for, but these days she's just another suburban working mom...whose toddler regularly recognizes her in the pages of Us Weekly. Welcome to Mommywood, where the stars are two feet tall and your neighbors know who you are before you move in. Like most parents, Tori wants her children to have the one thing she didn't have as a kid -- a normal family. On their hit Oxygen reality show, Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood, the starlet and her husband Dean McDermott regularly wrestle dirty diapers, host the neighborhood block party, and tackle temper tantrums on the red carpet. But when the cameras aren't rolling, Tori's still having awkward run-ins with a former 90210 costar at a laser tag birthday party, scooping rogue poo out of the kiddie pool on a resort vacation, and racing to win back her pre-baby body before the media starts calling her fat. For all her suburban fantasies, Tori Spelling is no June Cleaver. With the same down-to-earth wit that made her entertaining memoir sTORI telling a #1 New York Times bestseller, Tori tells the hilarious and humbling stories of life as a mom in the limelight. From learning to be the kind of parent her own mother never was to revealing what it's like to raise a family while everyone is watching, Mommywood is an irresistible snapshot of celebrity parenthood that you won't get from the paparazzi.

Ultimate Star Wars


Tricia Barr - 2015
    The book also highlights key events from the saga and provides fascinating insights into the making of the Star Wars movies.

The Holy Bible: New American Standard Version, NASB


Anonymous - 1920
    The New American Standard Version of the Holy Bible.

The Girls' Book: How To Be The Best At Everything


Juliana Foster - 2007
    35), do the perfect manicure (p. 82), or make your own lip gloss (p. 11).Feel like impressing your friends? Show them how you can make a crystal (p. 16), juggle one-handed (p. 33), or deal with a bully (p. 42).Bored and need something to do? Not anymore when you find out how to keep a secret diary (p. 88), make a scrapbook (p. 9), or put together a dance routine (p. 24).And tons of other neat-o things you need to know how to do!

AsapSCIENCE: Answers to the World’s Weirdest Questions, Most Persistent Rumors & Unexplained Phenomena


Mitchell Moffit - 2015
    This is the science that people actually want to learn, shared in a friendly, engaging style. And in the spirit of science, no subject is taboo. Amid the humor is great information and cocktail conversation fodder, all thoughtfully presented. Whether you're a total newbie or the next Albert Einstein, this guide is sure to educate and entertain...ASAP.

2 Kinds of People: A Visual Compatibility Quiz


João Rocha - 2017
    . . Over? Or under? This visual personality quiz, which doubles as a game, is the easiest way to discover if you and your friend/date/loved one/spouse/future roommate/coworker/person-you-just-met-in-a-bar are destined to be soul mates. Or mortal enemies.

What's Your Poo Telling You?: (Funny Bathroom Books, Health Books, Humor Books, Funny Gift Books)


Josh Richman - 2007
    But what does it mean? What's Your Poo Telling You will help you figure it out.Find out just how much you can learn from studying what's in the bowl: With universal appeal (everyone poops, after all), this witty, illustrated description of over two dozen dookies (each with a medical explanation written by a doctor) details what one can learn about health and well-being through your poo. A floater? It's probably due to a buildup of gas. Now think back on last night's dinner, a burrito perhaps?• All the greatest hits are here: The Log Jam, The Glass Shard, The Deja Poo, The Hanging Chard. the list goes on and on, so you'll learn about all of the variations and what they mean to your health• Also includes sidebars, trivia, over 60 euphemisms for number 2, and unusual case histories that make this the ultimate bathroom reader• With illustrations included, you'll get loads of facts about your health in a hilarious and entertaining book that finally gives poo the respect it deservesJosh Richman and Dr. Anish Sheth have written a tell-all tribute to poo that demystifies the inner working of the digestive tract and explains your health by what you see before you flush. • Josh Richman has an MBA from Stanford University and lives in the San Francisco Bay Area• Anish Sheth, M.D., is a gastroenterologist in Princeton, New Jersey, and is affiliated with the University Medical Center of Princeton at Plainsboro• A must-have gift for any bowel-movement obsessed loved one

The Gutfeld Monologues: Classic Rants from the Five


Greg Gutfeld - 2018
     In the past few years, Fox News host Greg Gutfeld has covered everything from crazed academics, to unhinged celebrities, to the wildest election in recent history on his shows The Five and The Greg Gutfeld Show. In The Gutfeld Monologues, he brings together his best and favorite monologues in this funny, unconventional collection for new and longtime fans alike. Scored through with marginal edits, scratch-outs, 20/20 hindsight, and up-to-the-minute commentary on what he got wrong, this book isn’t your grandmother’s anthology collection. With his signature humor, wit, and insight, Greg explains it all in this memorable collection about some of our country’s most crucial—and not so crucial—modern moments.

Paperboy


Christopher Fowler - 2009
    Caught between an ever-sensible but exhausted mother and a DIY-obsessed father fighting his own demons, Christopher takes refuge in words. His parents try to understand their son's peculiar obsessions, but fast lose patience with him - and each other. The war of nerves escalates to include every member of the Fowler family, and something has to give, but does it mean that a boy must always give up his dreams for the tough lessons of real life? Beautifully written, this rich and astute evocation of a time and a place recalls a childhood at once entertainingly eccentric and endearingly ordinary.

The Dilbert Principle: A Cubicle's-Eye View of Bosses, Meetings, Management Fads & Other Workplace Afflictions


Scott Adams - 1996
    Lavishly illustrated with Dilbert strips, these hilarious essays on incompetent bosses, management fads, bewildering technological changes and so much more, will make anyone who has ever worked in an office laugh out loud in recognition. The Dilbert Principle: The most ineffective workers will be systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage -- management.Since 1989, Scott Adams has been illustrating this principle each day, lampooning the corporate world through Dilbert, his enormously popular comic strip. In Dilbert, the potato-shaped, abuse-absorbing hero of the strip, Adams has given voice to the millions of Americans buffeted by the many adversities of the workplace.Now he takes the next step, attacking corporate culture head-on in this lighthearted series of essays. Packed with more than 100 hilarious cartoons, these 25 chapters explore the zeitgeist of ever-changing management trends, overbearing egos, management incompetence, bottomless bureaucracies, petrifying performance reviews, three-hour meetings, the confusion of the information superhighway and more. With sharp eyes, and an even sharper wit, Adams exposes -- and skewers -- the bizarre absurdities of everyday corporate life. Readers will be convinced that he must be spying on their bosses, The Dilbert Principle rings so true!

Heidegger and a Hippo Walk Through Those Pearly Gates: Using Philosophy (and Jokes!) to Explore Life, Death, the Afterlife, and Everything in Between


Thomas Cathcart - 2009
    That is, Death. The authors pry open the coffin lid on this one, looking at the Big D and also its prequel, Life, and its sequel, the Hereafter. Philosophers such as Schopenhauer, Nietzsche, Camus, and Sartre have been wrestling with the meaning of death for as long as they have been wrestling with the meaning of life. Fortunately, humorists have been keeping pace with the major thinkers by creating gags about dying. Death's funny that way--it gets everybody's attention. Death has gotten a bad rap. It's time to take a closer look at what the Deep Thinkers have to say on the subject, and there are no better guides than Cathcart and Klein.

Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow


Jerome K. Jerome - 1886
    This book wouldn't elevate a cow. I cannot conscientiously recommend it for any useful purposes whatever. All I can suggest is that when you get tired of reading 'the best hundred books, ' you may take this up for half an hour. It will be a change." (from the Preface to "Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow by Jerome Jerome)