Book picks similar to
Royal Flush by Scott Bartlett
humor
fantasy
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Shark & The Wolf: Predators and Prey
Daniel D. Shields - 2011
Escape into an exotic untamed world in this sci-fi adventure that has been called a cross between Gladiator, Planet of the Apes and The Hunger Games. In Las Vegas, Shaw, billionaire casino magnate and self proclaimed world's greatest showman, nears completion on the massive Serengeti Resort & Casino. Its amphitheater is being transformed into an authentic slice of African savanna for the show Predators and Prey which will savagely pit animal against animal in the bloodiest gladiatorial spectacle ever created for human entertainment. The only thing missing is the main attraction - which Shaw soon finds in Shark, the world's only Great White Half Man Half Shark Hybrid to be exact. Shaw envisions the show's tagline as "Come One - Come All To See - The Only Great White Shark In Captivity" but soon learns that capturing the world's top predator and delivering him to Vegas is easier said than done. This daunting task will require the cruel tactics of the evil animal slave trading hyena, Old Jack. The heartbreaking plans they devise and innocent pawns they use to try to coerce Sharks allegiance will force all to rely on primitive instincts to survive.
Happy Doomsday
David Sosnowski - 2018
One minute, people are going about their lives, and the next—not. In the wake of the inexplicable purge, only a handful of young misfits remains.When it all went down, “Wizard of Odd” Dev Brinkman was seeking shelter from the taunts of his classmates. Goth girl Lucy Abernathy had lost her best friend and had no clue where to turn. And Twinkie-loving quarterback “Marcus” Haddad was learning why you never discuss politics and religion in polite company—or online.As if life when you’re sixteen isn’t confusing enough, throw in the challenges of postapocalyptic subsistence, a case of survivor’s guilt turned up to seven billion, and the small task of rebuilding humankind…No one said doomsday would be a breeze. But for Dev, Lucy, and Marcus, the greatest hope—and greatest threat—will come when they find each other.
It Ends with Her
Brianna Labuskes - 2018
She’ll end it.FBI special agent Clarke Sinclair doesn’t give up easily. She’s spent years tracking serial killer Simon Cross, forced to follow his twisted clues and photographs across the country. Clarke knows that Cross selects only redheaded women and that he doesn’t target another victim until Clarke discovers the previous one.He’s never broken pattern…until now.A girl has already gone missing in upstate New York when a second one is kidnapped—a blonde. The killer’s MO has changed, sending Clarke back to the drawing board. The closer she gets to the truth, the deeper she’s drawn into an inescapable trap made just for Clarke. Whatever Cross’s ultimate game is, it ends with her.
The Bialy Pimps
Johnny B. Truant - 2012
The loathed customers are dealt the poor treatment they seem to deserve, bad rap music is played loudly, and The Rat is killed often enough to stem his immortality. And the insane homeless regulars -- like drunken Little Johnny Redbeard -- keep life interesting.But when a rival tricks the crew into thinking that the deli's closure is imminent, they do the only logical thing: instead of giving up, they decide to go out in a blaze of glory, handing their customers the humiliation and abuse that the pesky social contract had previously forbidden. But as insults turn to assaults and snide remarks turn to harassment and pro wrestling moves, a strange thing happens. Business goes up -- way up -- as people come back in droves, begging for more.But the flame that burns twice as bright burns half as long, and as pop-culture welcomes the parody musical group "The Bialy Pimps" and its frivolous merchandising machine -- and as the crew pushes to see how much bad behavior society will accept -- the violent road to fame begins to feel like a runaway train, out of control and headed for destruction…The Bialy Pimps is a tale that could only be spun by the twisted, vaguely profane mind of outspoken blogger Johnny B. Truant. Combining hilarity with questions about conformity and whether the tail or the dog is the one doing the wagging, this story can't help but raise a question for the reader: If the rest of your friends decided to submit to the Face-Kicking Machine, would you do it too?
The Secrets of Married Women
Carol Mason - 2007
Frustrated, she seeks comfort in her friends: fierce Leigh, with her high-powered career and doting family, and sweet, uncomplicated Wendy, who has a rock-solid marriage any woman would envy.Leigh and Wendy’s lives seem perfect. But beneath the surface are secrets that could tear their friendship apart.Leigh has grown tired of her stay-at-home husband and is looking for excitement—outside of the marriage bed. And after seventeen years of marriage, Wendy can’t shake the sense that there is something missing in her life.As Jill is drawn deeper into her friends’ relationships, she is confronted by a temptation of her own: an intriguing stranger whose good looks and charm spark an instant connection.Full of the realities of modern-day marriage, The Secrets of Married Women asks the question: how well can we ever know our husbands, our friends, or even ourselves?
Revised edition: This edition of Secrets Of Married Women includes editorial revisions.
FKA USA
Reed King - 2019
Frank Baum’s The Wizard of Oz, Douglas Adams’s A Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Cormac McCarthy’s The Road, and Ernie Cline’s Ready Player One.In Reed King’s wildly imaginative and possibly prescient debut, the United States has dissolved in the wake of environmental disasters and the catastrophic policies of its final president.It is 2085, and Truckee Wallace, a factory worker in Crunchtown 407 (formerly Little Rock, Arkansas, before the secessions), has no grand ambitions besides maybe, possibly, losing his virginity someday.But when Truckee is thrust unexpectedly into the spotlight he is tapped by the President for a sensitive political mission: to deliver a talking goat across the continent. The fate of the world depends upon it.The problem is—Truckee’s not sure it’s worth it.Joined on the road by an android who wants to be human and a former convict lobotomized in Texas, Truckee will navigate an environmentally depleted and lawless continent with devastating—and hilarious—parallels to our own, dodging body pickers and Elvis-worshippers and logo girls, body subbers, and VR addicts.Elvis-willing, he may even lose his virginity.FKA USA is the epic novel we’ve all been waiting for about the American end of times, with its unavoidable sense of being on the wrong end of the roller coaster ride. It is a masterwork of ambition, humor, and satire with the power to make us cry, despair, and laugh out loud all at once. It is a tour de force unlike anything else you will read this year.
The Dirty Parts of the Bible
Sam Torode - 2007
Tobias is obsessed with two things: God and girls. Mostly girls, of course. But being a Baptist preacher's son, he can't escape God. When his father is blinded in a bizarre accident (involving hard cider and bird droppings), Tobias must ride the rails to Texas to recover a long-hidden stash of money. Along the way, he's initiated into the hobo brotherhood by Craw, a ribald vagabond-philosopher. Obstacles arise in the form of a saucy prostitute, a flaming boxcar, and a man-eating catfish. But when he meets Sarah, a tough farm girl under a dark curse, he finds out that the greatest challenge of all is love.
The Mother Code
Carole Stivers - 2020
When a deadly non-viral agent intended for biowarfare spreads out of control, scientists must scramble to ensure the survival of the human race. They turn to their last resort, a plan to place genetically engineered children inside the cocoons of large-scale robots--to be incubated, birthed, and raised by machines. But there is yet one hope of preserving the human order--an intelligence programmed into these machines that renders each unique in its own right--the Mother Code.
Kai is born in America's desert southwest, his only companion his robot Mother, Rho-Z. Equipped with the knowledge and motivations of a human mother, Rho-Z raises Kai and teaches him how to survive. But as children like Kai come of age, their Mothers transform too--in ways that were never predicted. When government survivors decide that the Mothers must be destroyed, Kai must make a choice. Will he break the bond he shares with Rho-Z? Or will he fight to save the only parent he has ever known?In a future that could be our own, The Mother Code explores what truly makes us human--and the tenuous nature of the boundaries between us and the machines we create.
Zombies Don't Cry
Rusty Fischer - 2011
When he finally does, her whole life changes.Sneaking out to meet Stamp at a party one rainy night, Maddy is struck by lightning. After awakening, she feels lucky to be alive. Over time, however, Maddy realizes that she’s become the thing she and everyone else fear most: the living dead.With no heartbeat and no breath in her lungs, Maddy must learn how to survive as a zombie. Turns out there’s a lot more to it than shuffling around 24/7 growling, “Brains.” Needing an afterlife makeover is only the beginning of her problems. As Barracuda Bay High faces zombie Armageddon, Maddy must summon all of her strength to protect what matters most—just as soon as she figures out exactly what that is.
My Guardian Idiot and Other Fun Stories
Barbra Annino - 2012
A short collection of fantasy stories to tickle your funny bone.MY GUARDIAN IDIOT A woman is saddled with a bumbling angel sent to protect her. SEXUAL HEALINGA therapist with a unique strategy for healing her patients.GENIE SCHOOL DROPOUTAn antiques dealer inherits a genie who seems to be hard of hearing.STEPHEN KING KILLS HIS DARLINGSA funeral director receives on odd request from a famous horror author. CUPID’S ARROWThe son of Venus has a plan for his over-worked mother.
The Queen of New Beginnings
Erica James - 2010
After agreeing to help out a friend by shopping and cleaning for the unknown man staying at Cuckoo House, she soon becomes suspicious that her strange and obnoxiously rude client has something to hide. Clayton Miller's life is a mess. His career as one of the country's best comedy scriptwriters has stalled, and his long-term girlfriend has left him for his ex-best friend and ex-writing partner. Just when he thinks his life couldn't get any worse, he commits a spectacularly public fall from grace, and with the press hounding him, his agent banishes him to the middle of nowhere until the dust has settled. When Alice and Clayton discover the truth about each other they form an unlikely friendship—until Alice discovers Clayton has betrayed her in the worst possible way.
Little Boy Lost
J.D. Trafford - 2017
But when eight-year-old Tanisha Walker offers him a jar full of change to find her missing brother, he doesn’t have the heart to turn her away.Justin had hoped to find the boy alive and well. But all that was found of Devon Walker was his brutally murdered body—and the bodies of twelve other African American teenagers, all discarded like trash in a mass grave. Each had been reported missing. And none had been investigated.As simmering racial tensions explode into violence, Justin finds himself caught in the tide. And as he gives voice to the discontent plaguing the city’s forgotten and ignored, he vows to search for the killer who preys upon them.
Sign Off
Patricia McLinn - 2012
TV journalist Elizabeth “E. M.” Danniher will tell you she committed two sins — she didn’t stay young, and she made an enemy of a powerful news executive — her ex. She used to break national news. Now her top story as the “Helping Out!” reporter at dinky KWMT-TV in Sherman,Wyoming is getting a refund for a defective toaster. Tough, funny and determined, Elizabeth wrestles with isolation, keeping a professional edge, and an evolving self-image. Is Wyoming — the land of cattle, cowboys, tumbleweeds, and fewer than six people per square mile — her new home or a road to permanent obscurity? Soon she’s in a battle of wills with ex-football player turned journalist Mike Paycik, who sees her as a handy rung on his career ladder. And there’s the matter of a deputy sheriff—missing or murdered? Elizabeth finds herself investigating at the insistence of a girl who’s set on proving her father’s innocence. Not that enigmatic rancher Thomas David Burrell makes investigating easy. But Elizabeth won’t fade to black without a fight, no matter how final some might want to make her SIGN OFF. Don’t miss any of the Caught Dead in Wyoming series by USA Today bestselling author Patricia McLinn:Sign OffLeft HangingShoot FirstLast DitchLook LiveBack StoryCold OpenHot Roll
Molly Miranda: Thief for Hire
Jillianne Hamilton - 2015
Mostly. Calm down.)Jewels, art, historical artifacts—nothing is safe when this professional thief is on the job.(That makes it sound so sinister.)Lying to everyone you love is second nature when you work in that particular industry. The truth, however, becomes a little harder to hide when she falls into bed with her roommate/crush.Avoiding dealing with the unpleasantness of feelings, Molly takes an assignment in Scotland and is paired up with an untrustworthy wildcard. It doesn’t help that her new partner-in-crime is super annoying. And devastatingly handsome…(Are you suggesting there’s something between me and him? hahahahaha No. Just no.)When a mission doesn’t go according to plan, she wonders if it’s time to hang up her burglar mask for good and try having a normal life with a normal job. And a lot less trespassing.(Snore. Borrrring.)Join Molly on her hilarious adventures as she dodges bullets, wears disguises, and steals her way into trouble.
The Enemy We Know
Donna White Glaser - 2011
When one of her clients slips free from an abusive boyfriend, Letty becomes the target of his violent rage. Wayne invades Letty's life, slithering his way past the barriers erected between her personal and professional lives, leaving gifts of dead rats, mutilated dolls, and freaky Shakespearian sonnets. Worst of all, Wayne uncovers Letty's deepest shame, infiltrating her AA group and threatening to expose her to the state licensing board. And then--good news--Wayne is murdered. The bad news? The police suspect Letty. Worse yet, the sonnets and bloody souvenirs keep coming. Someone else has been watching Letty. Someone eager to drop bodies at her feet like a cat offering dead mole trophies to his mistress. Someone willing to kill again.