The Chicago-bred performer and royal king of the Original Kings of Comedy, Bernie Mac, has won over countless fans of cutting comedy and family humor with an edgy show that tells it like it is but never loses heart. No surprise, Mac has earned a reputation as perhaps the truest voice of modern humor. Here, in his debut book, Mac brilliantly captures the R-rated side of his comedic genius in print. Touring through a wide range of topics with equal parts insight and irreverence, Bernie presents a way of looking at the world guaranteed to make you laugh. Tackling superstar athletes, the movie business, his fellow comedians, his marriage, and, of course, his friends and family, Mac offers side-splitting riffs on sex, religion, hygiene, money, and more. Nobody is safe; nothing is sacred. Not even Bernie himself. Throughout I Ain't Scared of You, Mac turns his humor inward, firing off hilarious self-deprecating salvos about his golf game and his own hypocrisies. Bernie Mac's hit show and his vital live performances have earned him critical acclaim and international popularity. Now, I Ain't Scared of You reveals his humor whole—unpretentious, unafraid, and unbelievably funny and raw.

    Spanning his 50-year career and incorporating a rich and varied range of material, this second anthology is as wonderfully unmissable as the first. When Spike Milligan died in 2002, he left behind one of the most diverse legacies in British entertainment history – as well as a legion of devoted fans and admirers. His themes ranged from environmental issues to the war, from nostalgia to depression, and his prolific output covers some of the most evocative events of the twentieth century, in a style both twistedly comic and harrowingly honest.The huge success of the Spike Milligan anthology, ‘The Essential Spike Milligan’, has inspired a second raid on the original brilliant source. Milligan was arguably the most one of the prolific and mould-breaking comic writers of the twentieth century and this second anthology gives another opportunity to sample his finest writing. It includes more of the best from his war memoirs and novel Puckoon, his children's stories, poetry and drawings plus a wonderful collection from his voluminous correspondence from the 1960s onwards with such varied recipients as the House of Commons, the Director-General of the BBC, Private Eye and British Telecom. A compulsive read for all Milligan fans.

    The right way, the wrong way and the Top Gear way. Although, on reflection, that's usually just the wrong way, but faster and with more shouting. Anyway, the good news is that this third way of doing things can be applied to almost anything, and that includes motoring in general. All you need is the right guidance, which is where the brand new Top Gear Alternative Highway Code comes in. Top Gear's Altnernative Highway Code will show you how to bring the ambitious but rubbish philosophies of the world's most popular TV programme to your driving, containing advice on general motoring, as well as specific tips on how to deal with common eventualities like a rapidly sinking amphibious camper van, a caravan airship that's just crashed into a small bush, or a stupid home-made limousine that's snapped in half while transporting a top celebrity to an awards ceremony.Road users should not leave home without it.

    The book follows the author's death-defying 200-mile journey in his antique Thomas Crapper bath - not just across the Channel, but around Kent - right up to the tremendous reception and huge media attention which awaited him under Tower Bridge. Tim met the Queen, and his bath now resides in the National Maritime Museum of Great Britain.

    For example, I was once pinned down by a young lad who repeatedly asked me why I was hitting myself, when he knew full well that I had temporarily ceded hegemony over my hands and forearms. I tried to explain it to him, but he didn’t seem to comprehend. In retrospect, I can only conclude that my explanation was not articulate enough.To that end, I and Phil Plait have teamed up to create precisely 128 insults designed to weaken the resolve of aggressors, while educating them in their primary field of interest. Whether the person pummeling you is a student of mathematics or belles-lettres, we have the right words for the occasion.Zach WeinersmithPS: In the highly likely situation that the person pummeling you refuses to cease his aggression until he understands the meaning of the insult, we have also provided an appendix in which the insults are explained.

    From New York Times bestselling Shel Silverstein, celebrated creator of Where the Sidewalk Ends, A Light in the Attic, and Falling Up, comes an amazing collection of never-before-published poems and drawings.Have you ever read a book with everything on it? Well, here it is! You will say Hi-ho for the toilet troll, get tongue-tied with Stick-a-Tongue-Out-Sid, play a highly unusual horn, and experience the joys of growing down.What's that? You have a case of the Lovetobutcants? Impossible! Just come on in and let the magic of Shel Silverstein bend your brain and open your heart.And don't miss Runny Babbit Returns, the new book from Shel Silverstein!

    Ranging from his absurdist side (Message from a Cockroach; TV News: The Death of Humpty Dumpty; Tips for Serial Killers) to his unerring ear for American speech (Politician Talk; Societal Clichs; Euphemisms: 13 sections) to his unsparing views on America and its values (War, God, Stuff Like That; Zero Tolerance; Tired of the Handi-crap), Carlin delivers everything that his fans expect, and then adds a few surprises. Carlin on the battle of the sexes: Here's all you have to know about men and women: Women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.

    A Slip of the Keyboard brings together for the first time the finest examples of Pratchett's non fiction writing, both serious and surreal: from musings on mushrooms to what it means to be a writer (and why banana daiquiris are so important); from memories of Granny Pratchett to speculation about Gandalf's love life, and passionate defences of the causes dear to him.With all the humour and humanity that have made his novels so enduringly popular, this collection brings Pratchett out from behind the scenes of the Discworld to speak for himself - man and boy, bibliophile and computer geek, champion of hats, orang-utans and Dignity in Dying.

    With pictures! And illustrations! And, y'know, words.

    So he jumped into his fully alarmed Japanese S.U.V. and drove to American sports shrines for a year, everywhere from Larry Bird's boyhood home in French Lick, Indiana, to the cornfield just outside of Dyersville, Iowa, where Field of Dreams was filmed. Now in paperback, Road Swing is the story of his journey.

    Patrick's Day, and you get all choked up when you hear the chorus of "Danny Boy." But there's more to Irish culture than just shamrocks and leprechauns and getting bullixed and acting like a eejit on St. Paddie's Day. If you're ready to expand your knowledge and take the next step to becoming a 100 percent, bona-fide Irish person, then this is the book for you, boyo.The Feckin' Book of Everything Irish is a rollicking, no-holds-barred tour of genuine Irish culture as experienced through its music and food and, especially, its unique way with words. The four chapters in this book are veritably heavin' with Irish slang worlds and phrases, quotes by famous Irish wits, rousing Irish songs for your next hooley, and authentic recipes that'll make yer oul' wan proud. We've also included a brief history of sex and love in Ireland, which goes a long way toward explaining why the Irish have such a feckin' wicked sense of humor.So don't just stand there like a cow looking over a whitewashed wall, get to readin'! You'll be arseways with laughter in no time.Colin Murphy is the co-author of a series of seven successful books on aspects of Irish culture, and, as someone with a head like a lump of wet turf, is well versed in the vast range of expressions and slang words used the length and breadth of Ireland. He has great experience with Irish food, as he's been eating it since the day he was born, and he knows the lyrics of hundreds of Irish tunes backwards. In fact, when he sings them, it sounds like he's singing them backwards, too. He is fascinated with the study of sex in the middle ages, as he's in his forties himself. He works in the advertising industry, where he has developed a powerful reputation as someone who'd lick drink off a scabby leg. He is married to a fine bit of stuff and has two little gurriers who'd put the heart crossways in ye.Donal O'Dea is also the co-author of a series of seven successful books on Irish culture. He is regularly as sick as a plane to Lourdes, mainly because he has a great lip for the stout. He, too, works as an artist in advertising, though to his colleagues he's only a doss artist. He considers himself an expert on many aspects of Irish culture—music, food, sex and love, expressions, getting plastered, getting fluthered, getting paralytic, getting ossified, and getting langered. He's also a Dub and his missus is completely savage. He's got two snappers and a little bucko, and whenever he gets a night's sleep, he dreams of living the life of Reilly, throwin' shapes, and going on all-day sessions.

    Born in the north of England, both Si and Dave had their childhood challenges. For Si, being bullied as the fat kid in class was part of his daily school routine. For Dave, his life changed when he became a childhood carer for his mother. But through the challenges of their early years came a love of really good food.And it was food that brought Si and Dave together. Their eyes met over a curry and a pint on the set of a Catherine Cookson drama, and they knew they would be firm and fast friends for life.From deserts to desserts, potholes to pot roasts, the nation's favourite cooking duo reveals what's made their friendship such a special and lasting one. They've eaten their way around the world a good few times, but have never lost sight of what matters: great friends, great family and great food.In this heartwarming memoir of friendship and hilarious misadventure, Si and Dave take you on the ride of their lives!

    And it carries through to the vote that made Barack Obama the forty-fourth president of the United States.

    It is not only an exceptionally reliable source for dog greatness, it is also a one stop shop for happiness.   This book takes readers on a journey through the strict science of dog rating and the unwavering rules associated with it. Questioning the accuracy of these ratings is ill-advised. They are certainly not arbitrary and this book is absolutely not just about how cute dogs are. It truly is all about precision and ethics in dog rating.   The #WeRateDogs book will produce an audible reaction with every flip of the page—whether a groan from a terrible pupper pun or an “aww” of seeing a super floofer. If #WeRateDogs takes you away from reality and pushes you into this conglomerate of absurdity for even a second, then it has fulfilled its purpose.   “Witty, ironic captions that are cute, hilarious, and relatable all at once . . . WeRateDogs is a cultural force in its own right.” —Salon   “Next-level understanding of internet escapism . . . The real magic is the delightfully surreal captions.” —Esquire   “Such lighthearted humor . . . As WeRateDogs followers are constantly reminded, all dogs are good dogs.” —NPR

    The Major; "Don't mention the war!;" "He's from Barcelona;" Basil the Rat—everyone has a favorite line, moment, or character. In the first biography of the show, Graham McCann holds up to the light each of the unpredictable elements—the demented brilliance of John Cleese, his creative partnership with Connie Booth—that added up to an immortal sitcom, beloved all over the world, even in Barcelona.