And she got one-coming at her at forty miles per hour. Hit by a car and suffering debilitating injuries, and with no health insurance, the fashionista attempts to bounce back into her (thrift store-purchased) Jimmy Choos even as she deals with short-term memory loss, stalker ambulance drivers, trying to stay vegan on food stamps, crazy judges, hot doctors, and unsympathetic government workers.Inspired by her acclaimed one-woman show, this is a bitingly funny and keenly observed account of the cracks in our medical and social welfare system and how one woman's resilience combined with a generous dollop of humor helped her fight her way to recovery.

    He's a lothario, a linguist, and a specialist at looking on the bright side of life-- especially when it means twisting or turning a situation so it works in his favor! In this book, he will teach you how to do the same for yourself. He offers a plethora of thorough advice on parties, relationships, careers, love, friendship, and life in general-- there is something in here for everyone! Pepe's thoughts on friendship? "Love comes and goes .but friendship is forever, or at least until they run out of money and places to take you. Building lifelong relationships with people who aren't related to you or attractive to you is a strange habit, but one that's hard to shake. Here's how I deal with it..." Laugh-out-loud funny and in his authentic, Spanish-accented voice, Pepe's musings and guidance will delight readers of all ages with this fantastic comic relief! Served up with hot, fresh, and filled with wit, pith and a dash of salsa this is Pepe's guide to life, love and living large! From family to friendship to romance and everything is between, Pepe's words of wisdom are served up in fun and witty quotes and advice told with his signature brand of humor.

    This book may have occasional imperfections such as missing or blurred pages, poor pictures, errant marks, etc. that were either part of the original artifact, or were introduced by the scanning process. We believe this work is culturally important, and despite the imperfections, have elected to bring it back into print as part of our continuing commitment to the preservation of printed works worldwide. We appreciate your understanding of the imperfections in the preservation process, and hope you enjoy this valuable book.

    Entering a world of mysterious powers and nightmarish consequences, Chris realizes the secret belief of every teenage boy- that his wang has the power to change the world. The Monkey's Penis is the third installment in the terrifying Shingles series, and once again readers with weak hearts or bladders are advised to read on at their own risk...

     When the head of Nick Rohmer’s Miami accounting firm is found dead after a suspicious accident, Nick finds his quiet, comfortable, boring life slipping out of his control. With most of the firm’s management either on vacation, sick, or dead, Nick is thrust into the unfamiliar position of actually having some responsibility. The weight does not sit easily on his shoulders. He’s relieved when the instructions from the Chicago head office are – don’t do anything until we get there. This he can do. He tries to stick to his ‘do nothing’ instructions even as the firm’s largest client threatens to jump ship. But Nick’s plan of inaction is short-lived when he is convinced to try to save the business. He secures an invitation to dinner on the private island of the mega-wealthy, and highly dysfunctional, Keene family. Things quickly go from bad to disastrous when another dead body shows up, and Nick finds he's the prime suspect. As he gets sucked into the mystery, Nick’s focus quickly changes from trying to save the business to trying to save his skin.

    Now they get another slice of Hiaasen heaven in Paradise Screwed: a wide-ranging safari of South Florida's wildlife in its natural habitat-from fat-cat politicians to migrating mobsters, drowning Dolphins to stray chads. This collection of Miami Herald columns-written with a satiric wit and biting humor-offers a glimpse of the facts that inspire, and prove far stranger than, Hiaasen's frenetic fiction.

    Dear, simple mother, in her terrible clothes, and the twins, got up with more thought for economy than for beauty! I shopped extravagantly with them. The youngsters wanted to see everything in New York; but mother, despite all of those hard, lonely years in our rough country and the many interesting things for her to do and see in New York-- mother wanted nothing better than to stay with the baby.

     It was supposed to be a place where every child’s favorite characters came to life. And, it was, until those characters went nuts and started killing everyone. Then it wasn’t so happy. Ten years later Jake and his team of robot reclamation specialists are heading to the island theme park to confront the evil machines, discover Kat’s connection to the disaster and boost the flagging ratings on their reality show, Scrappers. Fearless Monkeynauts, overly friendly Bearberry Bears, feuding Presidents, Dinosty Warriors, fairy tale legends and more populate the abandoned park and only the Junkers are brave enough, or dumb enough, to go for a visit. Join Jake, Hailey, Kat, Savant, Mason and, of course, Glitch as they try to uncover the mystery of what they call The Tragic Kingdom.

    

    The economy is collapsing, his health is failing, and around his hometown of Broughty Ferry, Bob is struggling to get the respect he deserves. Fortunately his email junk folder is bursting with offers of assistance from around the world. In these genuine emails, Bob Servant looks to the Internet's worst con merchants and charlatans for answers to his many woes. The author of the bestselling Delete This At Your Peril and the critically acclaimed Radio 4 series The Bob Servant Emails is back with an all-new compilation of emails targeting a fresh batch of email spammers—the false lenders who have bravely stepped into the credit crunch, supposed doctors offering expensive treatments for Bob's ailments, and fake foreign soldiers offering him military advice in his campaign against a local bowling club. They all find a man from Broughty Ferry who is ready and willing to give them his valuable time.

    Assigned to a special K-9 unit with the best partner in the world, a Belgian Malinois named Rocky, Hallett has finally learned to balance police work with his family life. But that all changes in the heat of a Florida sugarcane field.While searching for a kidnapper, Rocky locks onto the scent of a predator unlike anyone has ever seen. Or have they? The more Hallett digs, the closer he comes to his old issues when the case that ended his career as a detective appears to be the key to a series of kidnappings.When the trail turns to murder, Hallett risks everything to catch the killer, even if it means clearing the child molester who drove him to violence and ruined his career. Along the way, Hallett and his partners learn the true meaning of loyalty and courage as their canine companions take police work to a new level and show that instinct means more than training. Scent of Murder is a gritty police thriller from veteran law enforcement agent and author James O. Born

    Introduction by Robert Silverberg. Afterwords by Norman Spinrad, Vonda N McIntyre, Robert Sheckley, Philip Jose Farmer, Thomas M Disch, and Edward Bryant.

    Dilbert has managed to keep up with technology like iPads and Twitter over the years, as well as advanced systems like the Disaster Preparedness Plan that has its followers eating the crumbs from their keyboards. It doesn’t get any more sophisticated than that.   It’s an office code violation to be this good after so many years, but Dilbert keeps doing what he does best: passive-aggressively out-witting his superiors and exercising conflict avoidance. And he is so good. No wonder office drones and workforce automatons alike can’t resist the cold embrace of Dilbert’s workplace.

    He has to get off a Caribbean island quick before someone nails him for a murder that may or may not be his doing. Desperate, he takes a job from two mob goons to sail their boat to Miami with a coffin -- the contents of which are dubious at best. Then he meets Jane Ellen Ashley, a blazing blue-eyed oyster shucker (who also might have accidentally killed somebody), and the trouble really rolls in. They've just stumbled onto a big-money scam involving some very dangerous people -- which puts them on the endangered species list.Now, they're both on the run from...well, pretty much everyone. And while Harry wants to make Jane his catch of the day, Jane wants to save her beloved Apalachicola Bay -- and both of them want to avoid a fatal case of the..."Oyster Blues

    Gary Handler has issues. His boss hates him, his mother hounds him, and his cat thinks he’s an idiot. But that’s okay because Gary’s got the perfect solution to all of life’s troubles: a porn site subscription and his right hand.Sadly, all habits grow old, even the fun ones. Gary soon finds himself at the doorstep of a creepy old pawn shop where he buys a used adult novelty toy to spice up his one-man sex life.Pity for him that it’s cursed by the angry spirits of all the “kids” he’s flushed down the toilet. Needless to say, hairy palms are about to become the least of his worries.----------Jack on, jack off ... with the Jacklight in book 2 of Shingles, the horror comedy series that’s not for those with faint hearts or weak bladders.