The chairman of the board, billionaire arms dealer and part-time philanthropist David Soper, decides that it's time to kill or cure. Business School alumnus and Las Vegas hotel genius Max Green is the perfect man for the job. A man of vision. A man with a mission. A man who knows that wealth-care is smarter than healthcare. He's going to make Samaritans great again. Andrew Sharp, star cardio-thoracic surgeon, turns his back on the NHS and buys in to this brave new world of Porsches and payola. But when his American Dream turns into a living nightmare, Andrew discovers that even the new-found love of his assistant, Cathy, may not be enough to save him… Samaritans is the new novel from the co-creator and writer of Yes Minister and Yes, Prime Minister. Praise for Samaritans 'A book George Orwell would have approved of.' The Sunday Times ‘It’s wonderful! I was hooked, mouth open, heart pounding. The catastrophic state of medical care is his story but Samaritans can be read too as a wider allegory, a discourse on a politics of greed, dis-entitlement, deregulation and social brutality that has run quite mad.’ Stephen Fry ‘It is with the highest confidence that I recommend this book, with particularity, to those Members of Congress who remain committed to making access to life saving care far too difficult for far too many people. It is my fondest hope that they might laugh their way to the education they so sorely require.’ Rick Ungar ‘Jonathan Lynn tackles the US healthcare system in satirical splendour. I laughed out loud. It is both hilarious and scary at the same time! Nobody does it better.’ Barbara Broccoli 'There is reason to believe Jonathan Lynn was not born in the US and, while probably not a spy, he has spent some little time observing Americans in the wild. His observations are not always flattering—he’s talking Big Medicine, Big Insurance, Big Business and their cousin, Small Ethics—but he certainly seems to have our number. Samaritans is smart, dark, and very, very funny. Stay healthy, America!' Michael McKean, Better Call Saul, Spinal Tap ‘Jonathan Lynn's Samaritans does for hospitals what Evelyn Waugh's The Loved One did for cemeteries. The book is laugh-aloud funny, but also deadly serious--because it deals with the lethal effect profit-minded health care can have on patient lives...I haven't read satire this hilarious and powerful since Riotous Assembly, the late Tom Sharpe's indictment of apartheid in South Africa. This is essential reading for anyone who has a body and wants to keep it alive.' M.G Lord ‘Comedy genius...as politically and socially important as is it is entertaining.’ Muriel Gray Jonathan Lynn is the multi-award winning author of The Complete Yes Minister and The Complete Yes, Prime Minister, which were drawn from the phenomenally successful BBC series which he created and wrote with Antony Jay, and which sold more than a million copies in hardback.

    One day he would mature into an award-winning man of business*, thriving entrepreneur and glittering member of the jet-set. A force of nature, a man who beat the odds, if only for a bit. This is his story. The story of Derek 'Del Boy' Trotter. Who else could tell the glorious tale of rags to riches to rags to rich(ish) but the man himself? You've heard of The Wolf of Wall Street, now meet the Pug of Peckham.*Trotter's Independent Traders, employee of the year 1982 - 2003

    Maybe it’s the noble title or the chivalry. Perhaps it’s the dashing sense of danger. No matter your preference, prepare to fall in love with five heroes who know how to make a girl swoon in any century:Truth Within Dreams: Claudia’s plan to stage her own ruination and escape marriage to the churlish and elderly Sir Saint seemed foolproof. She was sure the kindly Henry De Vere wouldn’t mind helping her out … but somehow she hadn’t counted on him actually proposing. Can a fake scandal lead to real dreams coming true?The Winter Promise: In the fall of 1053, Lady Imma has one loyalty: to help her uncle, the king of Wales, win his war against the English. Lord Robert, the steward of Wessex, has one loyalty as well: to keep his beloved Wessex safe from enemies. When she is forced to seek shelter in his keep, they must decide if they can listen to their hearts – or if they would be wiser never to trust each other. Revolutionary Hearts: To complete his mission in India’s fight for independence, General Carton—aka U.S. undercover operative Warren Khan—must hide both his true objective and his heritage. But once he meets the captivating Parineeta, who holds the key to both his freedom and capturing her brother, a suspected anarchist, he finds the subterfuge more difficult than anticipated. Merry’s Wonderful Christmas Gift: The winter holidays used to be Miss Merry Damonson’s favorite time of year. Until her almost-fiancé Edward Everton abandoned her two days before Christmas. Now he’s returned to their country village, but is it too late to reignite old flames? A holiday ball might just offer these unlucky lovers a second chance. An Unconventional Courtship: George Fitzpatrick had boarded the new omnibus intent on nothing more than a ride from one point to another. Until a gorgeous young blonde named Charlotte Ashcroft suddenly claims he is her chaperone. What’s an up-and-coming young banker to do but help a lady out?

    Borrowing from a well-known improve game, Mochrie takes the first and last lines from familiar classics and reimagines everything in between. With the same engaging humour he exhibits on stage, television, and film, he takes the reader in bizarre and hilarious new directions, using the original writer's words as a launch and landing point. Imagine A Tale of Two Cities in which Wile E. Coyote gets his revenge on the Road Runner, Dr. Seuss's The Cat in the Hat with zombies, or The Night Before Christmas with a time travelling twist. Imagine Sherlock Holmes devising a foolproof method for eliciting laughter and then taking the stage at a Victorian comedy club in Old London.This inspired collection is comical, quirky, and clever classic Mochrie.

    The book follows the author's death-defying 200-mile journey in his antique Thomas Crapper bath - not just across the Channel, but around Kent - right up to the tremendous reception and huge media attention which awaited him under Tower Bridge. Tim met the Queen, and his bath now resides in the National Maritime Museum of Great Britain.

    One forbidden love. Lady Cecily Balfour was always taught that the Hartley men are mad, bad and dangerous to know. When she meets Robert Hartley, Earl of Scarcliffe, she makes a few additions to that list: Stubborn. Infuriating. Handsome. Charming. Tempting. Society expects Cecily to make an advantageous match of her father’s choosing. What can she do now that her own choice is a man she is expressly forbidden to see? The Earl of Scarcliffe enjoys hunting, drinking, billiards, and bachelordom. Love does not feature on his list of requirements. Especially for a woman with a stubborn streak a mile wide and a penchant for riding off on his favourite stallion. And if that same woman is a Balfour? Not a chance! But Cecily just happens to have a pair of striking blue eyes, a taste for adventure and a rapier-sharp sense of humour… Robert’s heart is in as much danger as his head will be in if they are caught together. The Duke's Hidden Desire A reckless duke meets his match in a determined young woman – and throws her future into jeopardy with one stolen kiss. Miss Anna Hawkins, the daughter of a poor country doctor, knows the mysterious stranger who kissed her at the ball cannot really be the Duke of Beaumont. Dukes are virtuous and noble, and this man is arrogant, impudent… and dangerously seductive. Beaumont cannot forget Anna Hawkins. It’s not only her sharp mind and delicate features. It’s not only the flame-red hair he longs to caress. It’s not even that she is the only woman in England to say no to a duke. Anna is not afraid to chastise Beaumont for his lack of virtue, and he has never wanted anyone more. But it takes more than a dukedom to win a woman’s heart. The Lady He Longed For A brooding lord encounters his widowed childhood sweetheart – and they uncover a secret that could change everything… Lord Jonathan Hartley’s first love left him a broken man. Now that Isabella is back, widowed, wounded and more lovely than ever, the last thing he wants to do is revisit the past. But Isabella has a way of digging up all the secrets he thought he had buried. His undimmed love for the tragic heiress is only one of them. Isabella, the widowed Countess of Streatham, knows she belongs in Jonathan’s arms. But she is no longer the naïve debutante who believed in true love, and marriage brought her pain she vowed never to endure again. Jonathan abandoned her once, and if he wants her forgiveness, she will make him fight for it. Whether she falls in love again is quite a different question. The Baron's Inconvenient Bride In his haste to find a marriage of convenience, an arrogant baron proposes to his sworn enemy… Lady Jemima Stanhope has a secret she cannot share, even with her husband. Especially with her husband. Because that husband is the incorrigible rake, Lord Northmere.

    The essays in How to Ruin Everything range from the absurd (how he became an international ivory smuggler) to the comical (his middle-school rap battle dominance) to the revelatory (his experiences with epilepsy), yet all are delivered with the type of linguistic dexterity and self-awareness that has won Watsky more than 765,000 YouTube subscribers. Alternately ribald and emotionally resonant, How to Ruin Everything announces a versatile writer with a promising career ahead.

    fond of blood, allergic to sunlight, and mostly evil... until the night a sparkly unicorn stabs her through the heart with his horn. Oops. Her family thinks she was attacked by a vampire hunter (because, obviously, unicorns don't exist), and they're shocked she survived. They're even more shocked when Pearl discovers she can now withstand the sun. But they quickly find a way to make use of her new talent. The Vampire King of New England has chosen Pearl's family to host his feast. If Pearl enrolls in high school, she can make lots of human friends and lure them to the King's feast—as the entrees. The only problem? Pearl's starting to feel the twinges of a conscience. How can she serve up her new friends—especially the cute guy who makes her fangs ache—to be slaughtered? Then again, she's definitely dead if she lets down her family. What's a sunlight-loving vamp to do?

    (Women who leave wet teaspoons in sugar bowls need not apply)."I haven't woken up with a cup of tea by the bed for seven years. It seems such a small thing but it's one of a thousand things I miss about having someone around to take care of me. I have spent my entire adult life getting things the way I want them and all I want now is someone to give it all up for." Jon RichardsonIs your filing faultless? Your CDs, apostrophes, cutlery all in the right places? Can you eat a biscuit in the correct way? Then Jon Richardson (single for seven years and counting) could be your ideal man.Living alone in a one bedroom flat in Swindon, 27 year old Jon has had far too much time on his hands to think. In fact to obsess. About almost everything. Jon's obsessive compulsive personality disorder has seen him arrange the coins in his pockets in ascending size and colour code his bookshelves. It takes him less than 90 seconds to locate a receipt for a pair of shoes he bought in 1997. Over to the filing cabinet and R for receipts, S for shoes.But Jon doesn't want to be like this, in fact he would quite like to share his life with someone. But who could that someone be? Someone like himself, a quarrelsome perfectionist only with breasts and less body hair? Absolutely not. But who exactly is Jon looking for and where will he find her? Faced with a loveless future filled with his own peculiar quirks and perfectionism, Jon sets about his search for The One. The question is, will he mind her keeping the knives to the left of the forks in the cutlery drawer or organising the CDs by genre and not alphabetically?

    The author "discovered" the feline world's best-kept secret in a file hidden on his mother's computer by her cat, Cleo, and now shares it with humanity for the first time. Topics covered range from avoiding visits to the vet, to the artful display of captured prey, to getting in the way of a human trying to read anything, including this paragraph. Upon publication, Cleo denied authorship and hired a team of lawyers, all of whom have their claws out, but despite her best efforts the word is spreading: The Cat Manual is hilarious for cat-lovers of all ages. From the author of Cave Passages and Dark Life.