When My Mind Wanders It Brings Back Souvenirs


Gordon Kirkland - 2005
    Kirkland is a master at finding the small hidden bits of humor in events that the rest of us might just as easily overlook. His goal with his writing has always been to let his readers laugh with him and at him, and by doing so, finding a way to laugh at themselves. His previous books have been called "a must-have for all of us who love to just sit back and laugh." This book follows that tradition.Recipient of the 2006 Stephen Leacock Award of Merit for Humour (Canada.)

On the Road: Growing Up in Eight Journeys - My Early Years


Richard Hammond - 2013
    He's a child in the back seat of Dad's car on the way to the seaside in Weston-Super-Mare. He's on his first bike, a red one, in Solihull; then on his first motorcycle, a Honda MTX50. He's at the wheel of his first car, and with his first girlfriend. He is driving a furniture delivery van as part of his first job in and around Ripon. Now he is showing off with a friend, risking everything. Then he is surging ahead in an open-top, a successful TV star. Next, a car crash that made national headlines. This is an emotional road map in which each chapter has its own registration number, and its own distinctive interior. This memoir surges on to its destination, reversing or moving quickly through the gears, reliving the central episodes and conflicts of Richard's life. Although there are precious few road-rage monologues against four-wheel drivers and men in vests in white vans, Richard Hammond's readers will quickly recognize the funny, self-deprecating, and balanced ease that has made him one of Britain's best-loved writers and television hosts.

The World and I, Vol. 1: A Woman, Several Suitcases, 65 Countries.


Cassia Meare - 2017
    This is her story... Told with humor and insight into countries where she lived for months, The World and I is comprised of the real adventures of Cassia Meare as she jumps from country to country for work and learns to rely on herself. In the first volume she is sent to Algiers right after being hired and gets a scorpion as a marriage proposal in the Sahara; she travels from glorious St Petersburg all the way to Sakhalin in Russia just as it is emerging from communism -- without forgetting to stop at the casinos of Siberia; she falls in love with Istanbul and meets crazy Sergei and his gun in Kiev; she works with a very handsome man in Vladivostok -- only to travel on with him to stunning Rajasthan. Get an insider's view on Madrid, Rome, Palermo and find out more about Warsaw, Prague and what is in Azerbaijan. There will be information on culture, sights, history -- but most of all there will be the people Meare finds along the way, often the most memorable things about her trips. You'll laugh, discover things about places you might never go to, or which have changed beyond recognition since then. You'll also find out about some of the world's most beautiful spots. Just don't expect this book to teach you how to travel for less...

Bill Bryson Box Set: Three Vols. A Walk In The Woods, Notes From A Big Country, Notes From A Small Island


Bill Bryson
    A box set consisting of three Bill Bryson books, 'Notes from a Small Island', 'Notes from a Big Country' and 'A Walk in the Woods'.

Narrow Escape - A Year of Highs and Lows on Narrowboat Minerva (Narrow Boat Books)


Marie Browne - 2013
    This month by month account of one family’s liveaboard year takes a firmly tongue in cheek look at what it takes to enjoy the ‘idyllic’ lifestyle.

The Grumpy Old Git's Guide to Life


Geoff Tibballs - 2011
    We all know one! They like to groan and grumble, offering their own commentary on the shortcomings of modern life. Whether it is queues at the supermarket, the state of the health system, the price of a pint these days, the hairstyles of teenagers, or the number of Maltesers you actually get in a bag, there is always something that will get their goat. 'The Grumpy Old Git's Guide to Life' is a hilarious celebration of all these grumps, how to identify one, what exactly they find so irritating and why we find their rants quite so amusing.

Confessions of a Call Centre Worker


Izabelle Winter - 2017
    Could you keep your cool while talking to all levels of stupid? Would you be able to wear a headset all day without wanting to throw it out of the window? All calls are recorded, analysed and timed to the second. Average handling time (AHT) is discussed as if it's the very meaning of life and managers are always coming up with new ways to shave milliseconds from each call. Is it acceptable to only have a total eight minutes a day for visits to the toilet or coffee machine? Imagine not being allowed to hang up on someone who is screaming abuse down the line at you. Welcome to the Call Centre! Izabelle worked in call centres for many years; from insurance to home shopping, from selling advertising to discussing loans. Finally in the early hours one morning, she decided enough was in fact far too much and left her final call centre job the same day, never to return. On her way out of the door for the final time she vowed she would write a book about life in a call centre. Here is that book. Read about call centres in general, memorable customers and staff. How do staff stay sane? What is Big Red? Are cranberries the true meaning of Christmas? Why would you have leather trousers round your ankles in a lift? How not to impress your boss. Izabelle shares these and many other true tales from her years of incarceration in UK call centres.

Tales from the Dad Side: Misadventures in Fatherhood


Steve Doocy - 2008
    Personally, I think the eye-catching cover shot of me in my pajamas is reason enough. (By the way, those are my real kids on the cover, and yes, those are my actual ankles. No, I'm not retaining water.)What you're holding in your hands is a very funny and sometimes remarkably poignant look at fathers, not from the mother's point of view or the child's, but from the dad's side. Which is why it's called Tales from the Dad Side.It's filled with stories of what it's like to be a dad and a son, from a child's first day of kindergarten to the awkward sex talk and right up to the day the always-practical dad tries to pay for college with bonus miles. I was there for every landmark in my children's lives, except the day I was on the riding lawn mower and missed my son's first words, which my wife insists were “trust fund.”As children get older, the lessons of the father get harder, like teaching my son how to shave just as my father taught me, with a rusty double-edged safety razor. At the end of my dad's lesson, I emerged from the bathroom nicked and gouged, looking like an extra from a Quentin Tarantino film. My more civilized son is a Norelco man. With my high-school-age daughters, I promised them a day on which I'd take them anywhere and do anything with them they wanted, expecting them to ask for dinner and a movie; I was horrified when they told me they wanted all of us to get manicures and pedicures together. That was not the answer I was expecting; it was like discovering Lou Dobbs was an illegal alien.Over the course of raising three children, I have learned with my wife that fathers are different from mothers. That could be the greatest understatement since Noah turned on the Weather Channel and found out that the next forty days called for a 20 percent chance of light rain.The truth is, fatherhood is like Wikipedia: some parts based in fact, others just made up along the way. And while bookstores are filled with tales of mothers, their children and families, there are few from the dad's side. Now, as a public service, I'm doing my part to right this wrong.I sincerely hope this answers your questions. If perhaps it's not exactly your cup of tea, I bet you've got a father or mother in your life who'd like the stone-cold truth about dads. Besides, for the same money, you can either put three gallons of gas in your car or take home this book, which has a highway rating of 29 smiles an hour.Steve Doocy

Holy Toledo: Lessons From Bill King, Renaissance Man of the Mic


Ken Korach - 2013
    Bill was also one of the most influential broadcasters of all time, an inspiration to legions of his fellow broadcasters who looked up to him. No less an authority than John Madden tells Ken Korach in this 80,000-word testament to Bill’s uniqueness that when he turned from coaching to broadcasting, no one was more of an influence on him than Bill. But this was true of Bill the man as well, not merely Bill the broadcaster. “We all wanted to live vicariously through Bill. The things that he did, we wished we could do,” Madden tells Ken Korach. Korach, longtime voice of the A’s and Bill’s partner for ten seasons until King’s death in 2005, is the perfect one to bring Bill to life on the page. A half-century ago, Ken Korach was a kid in Los Angeles, spinning the night dial to tune in Warriors basketball games from faraway San Francisco for one reason: He just had to hear Bill. Now, in Holy Toledo – Lessons from Bill King, Renaissance Man of the Mic, he tells the remarkable story of King the legendary baseball, basketball and football broadcaster. Bill was a student of Russian literature, a passionate sailor, a fan of eating anything and everything from gourmet to onions and peanut butter, a remarkable painter. Korach draws on a lifetime of listening to and learning from King – as well as extensive research, including more than fifty interviews with King’s family members, colleagues, friends and associates – to create this rich portrait, eagerly awaited by thousands of fans who have flocked to the Holy Toledo Facebook page and heard about the book through Ken’s media appearances.Holy Toledo features a moving foreword by Hall of Fame broadcaster Jon Miller, previously of ESPN, and a brilliant cover by Mark Ulriksen, internationally recognized for his New Yorker magazine covers, that captures King’s flair and personality.Billy Beane“The best part about Bill wasn’t just that he was so good at his job but that he was so interesting outside of his job. His mustache epitomized that. He looked eccentric and he was eccentric, in a good way.”Bob Welch“If I had a hitter I had trouble with, I’d ask Bill how I should pitch him. He always had a good answer.”Greg Papa“Bill King was the greatest radio broadcaster in the history of the United States.”Tom Meschery“Talking with Bill was like talking with an encyclopedia.… If you wanted to talk sports, literature – when Bill talked you listened, because he always had something interesting to talk about.”Al Attles“He didn’t sugarcoat it. Bill was a departure from the way it was. If a player from the Warriors made a mistake, Bill told it like it was.”Ed Rush“I’d put the radio out the window and keep turning it to certain angles and it would go in and go out. I’d listen to the Warriors and the Raiders. To do all three sports like he did, he was phenomenal. He was out of this world.”Tom Flores“Bill made some of the great plays in the history of the Raiders even greater with his description. Those moments were kept alive in his voice.”Jason Giambi“He was such an incredible man. I had so much fun with him and he would always ask how my family was doing and I have the fondest memories of him. We would talk about life and all the things he had seen. He made me well rounded.”Rick Barry“He had the ability to see a game, a basketball game, and express what was happening in eloquent terms, at times instantaneously. When he was saying something, it was happening.”

Hate Mail from Cheerleaders: And Other Adventures from the Life of Reilly


Rick Reilly - 2007
    A 22-year veteran of Sports Illustrated and a 10-time National Sportswriter of the Year, Reilly took over SI's back page in 1998, and his column immediately attracted a devoted following, including the legions of fans who helped make his first collection, The Life of Reilly, a New York Times best seller in 2000. Now comes Hate Mail from Cheerleaders, 100 of Reilly's favorites, along with a new foreword and column postscripts by the author. Alternately sidesplitting and heartwarming but always opinionated and provocative, these pieces are the best work by the best columnist in the business.

The Pie At Night: In Search of the North at Play


Stuart Maconie - 2015
    Industry, toil and grime. Its manufacturing roots mean we still see the North of England as a hardworking place. But, more than possibly anywhere else, the North has always known how to get dressed up, take itself out on the town and have a good time. After all, working and playing hard is its specialty, and Stuart Maconie is in search of what, exactly, this entails what it tells us about the North today.Following tip offs and rumour, Stuart takes trip to forgotten corners and locals’ haunts. From the tapas bars of Halifax to the caravan parks of Berwick Upon Tweed, from a Westhoughton bowling green to Manchester’s curry mile, via dog tracks and art galleries, dance floors and high fells, Stuart compares the new and old North, with some surprising results.The Pie at Night could be seen as a companion to the bestselling Pies and Prejudice, but it is not a sequel. After all, this is a new decade and the North is changing faster than ever. This is a revealing and digressive journey and a State of the North address, delivered from barstool, terrace, dress circle and hillside.

Til The Fat Girl Sings: From an Overweight Nobody to a Broadway Somebody-A Memoir


Sharon Wheatley - 2006
    Broadway actress Sharon Wheatley reveals an authentic and personal look at the damaging physical and emotional effects of childhood obesity.

Ah Well, Nobody's Perfect: The untold stories


Ian Molly Meldrum - 2016
    Molly gives us his unforgettable encounters with The Beatles, Elton John, David Bowie, The Rolling Stones, Madonna, John Farnham, Bruce Springsteen, the Bee Gees, Rod Stewart, Russell Crowe, Oasis, Beyonce and Prince. As well as the tales that surround his other loves: the Australian cricket team, the St Kilda footy club and the Melbourne Storm."I have a lot of love for the great Ian 'Molly' Meldrum" - Shane WarneNo one has lived a life like Ian 'Molly' Meldrum. And no one can tell a story like Molly.

Bag of Meat on Ball of Dirt (Kindle Single)


Mara Altman - 2016
    That quixotic quest for understanding has drawn much of the world’s population eastward ever since Buddha first assumed the lotus position, and writer Mara Altman needed to know why. So she flew around the world in search of an answer not only to that mystery, but also to the deeper questions that plague all who yearn to define the meaning of life. What Altman found in her wild, comic 18-day reporting trek across India – a journey that took her on a laborious, 37-hour cross-country train trip, onto a mystical flat rock by the ocean in Pondicherry, and eventually into the emergency room of a cut-rate Bangalore hospital – will make you laugh, learn and ponder. By the end of her epic odyssey, it will also take you unexpectedly and thrillingly close to the pulsing heart of human existence. After graduating from Columbia University’s Graduate School of Journalism, Mara Altman worked as a staff writer for The Village Voice. In 2009, HarperCollins published Altman's first book, Thanks For Coming: A Young Woman's Quest for an Orgasm, which was optioned as a comedy series by HBO. She has published seven bestselling Kindle Singles, including the #1 bestseller Bearded Lady, and has also written for New York Magazine and The New York Times. Cover design by Adil Dara

The Force is Middling in this One: And Other Ruminations from the Outskirts of the Empire


Robert Kroese - 2010
    Laboriously compiled from three years of blog posts from MattressPolice.com, this collection covers topics as varied as the Incredible Hulk, perpetual motion machines and Satanism, and is sure to keep you running back to the bathroom for more. In fact, we've even included (on page 187*) a laminated card that reads: PLEASE EXCUSE MY FREQUENT TRIPS TO THE BATHROOM AS I HAVE A SEVERE BOWEL AND/OR URINARY TRACT CONDITION. This will allow you to read in peace without having to face embarrassing questions from your family and friends. *If your card is missing, please check all of the other pages. If you still don't find it, address the proprietor of the book shop sternly as follows: "SIR OR MADAM: I AM SHOCKED TO FIND THAT THIS BOOK CONTAINS NO CARD INDICATING THAT I HAVE A SEVERE BOWEL AND/OR URINARY TRACT CONDITION. WHAT, SIR OR MADAM, ARE YOU TRYING TO PULL, EXACTLY?" If you are still unable to get satisfaction, please purchase a copy of the author's critically acclaimed, bestselling novel Mercury Falls. The card is on page 119. WE PROMISE.