The Dangerous Book for Boys


Conn Iggulden - 2006
    This is a wonderful collection of all things that make being young, or young at heart, fun. Audio includes: Questions About the World, How to Play Stickball, The Rules of Soccer, Fishing, Famous Battles, Extraordinary Stories, Girls, First Aid, The Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, Seven Modern Wonders of the World The perfect book for every boy from eight to eighty.

There's a Hair in My Dirt!: A Worm's Story


Gary Larson - 1998
    It was a cartoon that appeared for many years in daily newspapers and was loved by millions. (And was confusing to millions more.) But one day he stopped.Gary went into hiding. He made a couple short films. He played his guitar. He threw sticks for his dogs. They threw some back.Yet Gary was restless. He couldn't sleep nights. Something haunted him. (Besides Gramps.) Something that would return him to his roots in biology, drawing and dementia--a tale called There's a Hair in My Dirt! A Worm's Story.It begins a few inches underground, when a young worm, during a typical family dinner, discovers there's a hair in his plate of dirt. He becomes rather upset, not just about his tainted meal but about his entire miserable, wormy life. This, in turn, spurs his father to tell him a story--a story to inspire the children of invertebrates everywhere.And so Father Worm describes the saga of a fair young maiden and her adventuresome stroll through her favorite forest, a perambulator's paradise. It is a journey filled with mystery and magic. Or so she thinks.Which is all we'll say for now.What exactly does the maiden encounter?Does Son Worm learn a lesson?More important, does he eat his plate of fresh dirt?Well, you'll have to read to find out, but let's just say the answers are right under your feet.Written and illustrated in a children's storybook style, There's a Hair in My Dirt! A Worm's Story is a twisted take on the difference between our idealized view of Nature and the sometimes cold, hard reality of life for the birds and the bees and the worms (not to mention our own species).Told with his trademark off-kilter humor, this first original non--Far Side book is the unique work of a comic master.Now Larson can finally sleep at night.Question is, will you?(from the back cover)

Learn Me Good


John Pearson - 2006
    He has forty children, and all of them have different mothers..."Jack Woodson was a thermal design engineer for four years until he was laid off from his job. Now, as a teacher, he faces new challenges. Conference calls have been replaced with parent conferences. Product testing has given way to standardized testing. Instead of business cards, Jack now passes out report cards. The only thing that hasn't changed noticeably is the maturity level of the people surrounding him all day.Learn Me Good is Jack's hilarious retelling of his harrowing rookie year, written as a series of emails to Fred Bommerson, his former engineering coworker. Inspired by real-life experiences of rambunctious and precocious children, lesson plans gone awry, and incredibly outrageous quotes, this laugh a minute page turner will give you a new appreciation for educators. Jack holds a March Mathness tournament, he faces a child's urgent declaration of "My bowels be runnin'!", and he mistakenly asks one girl's mother if she is her brother. With subject lines such as "Irritable Vowel Syndrome," "In math class, no one can hear you scream," and "I love the smell of Lysol in the morning," Jack fills each email with sarcastic (yet loving) humor, insightful observations, and plenty of irreverent wit.If you've ever taught, you will undoubtedly recognize aspects of your own students in Jack's classroom. If you've never set foot in a classroom, you will still appreciate the funny quirks, behaviors, and quotes from the kids and adults alike."I teach, therefore I am...poor!"

The Hoboken Chicken Emergency


Daniel Pinkwater - 1977
    When Arthur Bobowicz is sent out to bring home the family's Thanksgiving turkey, he returns instead with Henrietta -- a 266-pound chicken with a mind of her own. Thus begins the hilarious chain of events that has kept readers in stitches since Henrietta first pecked her way onto the scene in 1977. Revised and with brand-new art by Jill Pinkwater, this new edition of "The Hoboken Chicken Emergency" is sure to delight chicken-lovers of all ages.

Pippi Longstocking


Astrid Lindgren - 1945
    She has crazy red pigtails, no parents to tell her what to do, a horse that lives on her porch, and a flair for the outrageous that seems to lead to one adventure after another!

The Name of This Book Is Secret


Pseudonymous Bosch - 2007
    As much as he'd love to sing the praises of his book (he is very vain), he wouldn't want you to hear about his brave 11-year old heroes, Cass and Max-Ernest. Or about how a mysterious box of vials, the Symphony of Smells, sends them on the trail of a magician who has vanished under strange (and stinky) circumstances. And he certainly wouldn't want you to know about the hair-raising adventures that follow and the nefarious villains they face. You see, not only is the name of this book secret, the story inside is, too. For it concerns a secret. A Big Secret.

The 13 Clocks


James Thurber - 1950
    It is beautiful and it is comic. It is philosophical and it is cheery. What we suppose we are trying fumblingly to say is, in a word, that it is Thurber.There are only a few reasons why everybody has always wanted to read this kind of story: if you have always wanted to love a Princess; if you always wanted to be a Prince; if you always wanted the wicked Duke to be punished; or if you always wanted to live happily ever after. Too little of this kind of thing is going on in the world today. But all of it is going on valorously in The 13 Clocks.

The Velveteen Rabbit


Margery Williams Bianco - 1922
    This reissue of a favorite classic, with the original story and illustrations as they first appeared in 1922, will work its magic for all who read it.

Simon's Cat


Simon Tofield - 2009
    Now, the feline Internet phenomenon makes his way onto the page in this first-ever book based on the popular animated series. Simon's Cat depicts and exaggerates the hilarious relationship between a man and his cat. The daily escapades of this adorable pet, which always involve demanding more food, and his exasperated but doting owner come to life through Tofield's charming and hilarious illustrations.

Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids


Rob Elliott - 2010
    Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids provides children ages 7-10 many hours of fun and laughter. Young readers will have a blast sharing this collection of hundreds of one-liners, knock knock jokes, tongue twisters, and more with their friends and family! This brand new book will have children rolling on the floor with laughter and is sure to be a great gift idea for any child.

Rumple Buttercup: A Story of Bananas, Belonging, and Being Yourself


Matthew Gray Gubler - 2019
    A charming and inspiring story written and narrated by Criminal Minds actor/director, Matthew Gray Gubler.Rumple Buttercup has five crooked teeth, three strands of hair, green skin, and his left foot is slightly bigger than his right.He is weird.Join him and Candy Corn Carl (his imaginary friend made of trash) as they learn the joy of individuality as well as the magic of belonging.

I'm Just No Good at Rhyming: And Other Nonsense for Mischievous Kids and Immature Grown-Ups


Chris Harris - 2017
    With enthusiastic endorsements from bestselling luminaries as Lemony Snicket, Judith Viorst, Andrea Beaty, and many others, this entirely unique collection offers a surprise around every corner: from the ongoing rivalry between the author and illustrator, to the mysteriously misnumbered pages that can only be deciphered by a certain code-cracking poem, to the rhyming fact-checker in the footnotes who points out when "poetic license" gets out of hand. Adding to the fun: Lane Smith, bestselling creator of beloved hits like It's a Book and The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales, has spectacularly illustrated this extraordinary collection with nearly one hundred pieces of appropriately absurd art. It's a mischievous match made in heaven!

C D B!


William Steig - 1968
    Full color.

The Bro Code


Matt Kuhn - 2008
    Some call it morality. Others call it religion. But Bros in the know call this holy grail the Bro Code.Historically a spoken tradition passed from one generation to the next, the official code of conduct for Bros appears here in its published form for the first time ever. By upholding the tenets of this sacred and legendary document, any dude can learn to achieve Bro-dom.

The Unadulterated Cat


Terry Pratchett - 1989
    But the Campaign for Real Cats sets out to change all that by helping us to recognise a true, unadulterated cat when we see one.For example: real cats have ears that look like they've been trimmed with pinking shears; real cats never wear flea collars . . . or appear on Christmas cards . . . or chase anything with a bell in it; real cats do eat quiche. And giblets. And butter. And anything else left on the table, if they think they can get away with it. Real cats can hear a fridge door opening two rooms away . . .