Gary Handler has issues. His boss hates him, his mother hounds him, and his cat thinks he’s an idiot. But that’s okay because Gary’s got the perfect solution to all of life’s troubles: a porn site subscription and his right hand.Sadly, all habits grow old, even the fun ones. Gary soon finds himself at the doorstep of a creepy old pawn shop where he buys a used adult novelty toy to spice up his one-man sex life.Pity for him that it’s cursed by the angry spirits of all the “kids” he’s flushed down the toilet. Needless to say, hairy palms are about to become the least of his worries.----------Jack on, jack off ... with the Jacklight in book 2 of Shingles, the horror comedy series that’s not for those with faint hearts or weak bladders.

    Their children’s home Marshall’s is full of love and laughter, and a world away from their terrible ordeal of being sold to Una Reed for five shillings.There are many more children who still need a home, especially in a world where the workhouse is the last option for desperate families, and so Minnie makes it her mission to build Marshall’s into a refuge for all the waifs and strays. But kind hearts can be taken advantage of, and before long, Marshall’s in under attack. Can Minnie and Billy keep their family together and keep all the children safe, or will they be torn apart again? The Queen of the Black Country sagas is back with a heart-warming, unputdownable and unforgettable tale of triumph against the odds. Perfect for fans of Val Wood and Lyn Andrews.

     ENGLISH MAJORS. You know who you are and here is a double-CD celebrating the secret society of those who, though they may be chauffeuring kids to swim lessons or writing Unix programs or frying cheeseburgers, still could, if need be, write a term paper on the water imagery in "The Waste Land." Includes the "Six-Minute Hamlet," the "Ten-Minute MacBeth," tributes to Hawthorne and Kerouac and Emily Dickinson, a Guy Noir adventure that exposes an M.F.A. scam, the Ballad of John Henry ('John Henry was an English major and poetry was his line. He sat by the window with his yellow legal pad and he wrote one sentence at a time.'), and more. With guest appearances by Allen Ginsberg, Billy Collins, Roy Blount Jr., Robert Bly, Donald Hall, and Calvin Trillin.

    From nicotine gum addiction to lesbian personal ads to incontinent dogs, Possible Side Effects mines Burroughs's life in a series of uproariously funny essays. These are stories that are uniquely Augusten, with all the over-the-top hilarity of Running with Scissors, the erudition of Dry, and the breadth of Magical Thinking. A collection that is universal in its appeal and unabashedly intimate, Possible Side Effects continues to explore that which is most personal, mirthful, disturbing, and cherished, with unmatched audacity. A cautionary tale in essay form. Be forewarned--hilarious, troubling, and shocking results might occur.

    But soon it becomes clear that his motives are not all they seem.At the age of 11, Emily is groomed into being a ‘county lines’ drug trafficker. It is the beginning of a vicious cycle that sees her become prey to one abuser after another, involving a huge child-sex-trafficking gang.The scale of the abuse – at the hands of hundreds of men – is sickening, and at times it feels like there will never be an escape. But then, in the darkest of moments, a ray of light shines …This is the moving true story of how one girl overcame her traumatic past and learned to love for the very first time.

    Theatre script, playbook

    Her mother may stand silently at the sink year after year, or lie in the basement weeping, but Albanese is determined to flee the deadening certainty of her parents' lives. Her story does not disappoint us.By turns haunting, hilarious, tragic, and romantic, Blue Suburbia is the chronicle of a determined young woman who overcomes family limitations, socio-economic obstacles, and personal fears to build a happy -- and blessedly ordinary -- life. Written entirely in free verse, Blue Suburbia's cadence is a steady, rhythmic heartbeat, pulsing with pain, rebellion, love, and triumph. This is the story many of us might tell, if we had the courage.

    From THE WHORE OF MENSA, to GOD (A Play), to NO KADDISH FOR WEINSTEIN, old and new Woody Allen fans will laugh themselves hysterical over these sparkling gems.

    This songbook contains easy piano arrangements of a dozen songs from Mel Brooks' Broadway blockbuster, the winner of a record 12 Tony Awards! Includes: Along Came Bialy * Der Guten Tag Hop-Clop * Goodbye! * Haben Sie Gehort Das Deutsche Band? * I Wanna Be a Producer * In Old Bavaria * Keep It Gay * Prisoners of Love * Springtime for Hitler * That Face * 'Til Him * When You Got It, Flaunt It.

    When she reaches her unplanned destination, self acceptance, you’ll shout hallelujah!

    It's easy to see why Mr. Martin, who wrote the film...was moved to reinvent this role...Mr. Martin's screenplay is bighearted and funny.' The New York Times

    He’s lost control of Congress, has to decide whether to run for a second term, and his wife and teenage daughter are barely talking to him. What’s more, the Angel of Death has sent a rather inept “repo man” who is at the foot of his bed, giving him only one more day to live.Cast members include Justin Bartha, Irene Bedard, Annette Bening, Chris Cafero, Dick Cavett, Auli'i Cravalho, Billy Crystal, Rachel Dratch, Darrell Hammond, Christopher Jackson, Robert King, Kevin Kline, and Robin Thede.©2018 Audible Originals, LLC (P)2018 Audible Originals, LLC

    Some move toward the future heartened by what they learn from those around them--a tattoo artist, an invented medicine man, zoo animals, strangers, fellow outsiders. Deftly rendered, these stories abound with oddness and grace.In “Tattooizm,” included in The Best American Short Stories 2006, a young woman struggles with a promise that her boyfriend is determined to make her keep. In the Nelson Algren Award–winning “Space,” a reluctantly undertaken errand forces a young man to finally confront the death of his mother. And in “The Medicine Man,” hailed by the Times (U.K.) as “perfectly pitched and perfectly written,” a man recounts his manic attachment to his sister.Moffett’s closely observed stories are candid and complex, funny and moving. The world of Permanent Visitors is an idiosyncratic and generous one, its inhabitants searching for constancy in a place crowded with contradiction.

    Like, for example, it’s not nine months, it’s ten long months. We are three thirty-something women who were fortunate enough to be pregnant at the same time. We shared our questions, fears, humor, and experiences through emails, which became our lifeline and virtual support group. Here, we share the good, the bad, and the ugly of our experiences. We do not hold back for the squeamish or the faint of heart—you need the truth, and now!We are all social workers with graduate education, and we have all worked in the obstetrical units of hospitals for many years. Along the way, we thought it might be helpful to have someone sane weigh in on our hormonal ramblings, so we asked Dr. Bob, a specialist in high-risk pregnancies to help us out. But, we know that all of this experience is nothing like being pregnant yourself!So prop up your cankles, rest this book upon your shelf of a belly, and check out our email log. We made it through the entire experience and lived to tell the tale—and you will too.*Winner of Mom's Choice Award

    It should be read between book 4, Begin Where We Are, and book 5, Entangled With You.If Magnus and Kaitlyn’s life together is a tapestry, then this, dear reader would be an unraveling thread.This happened. Except no one in the world knows or remembers.The fifth part of their story can be told without this thread. We could snip it off and drop it to the floor, except…We ought to know of it to carry on. We can remember. Because this strand, that once weaved their life is gone now — replaced by another, stronger, more exquisite weaving — but it existed. And it changed their whole story. Book 1 — Kaitlyn and the HighlanderBook 2 — Time and Space Between UsBook 3 — A Warrior of My OwnBook 4 — Begin Where We AreShort story 4.5 — A Missing EntanglementBook 5 — Entangled With YouBook 6 — Magnus and a Love Beyond WordsBook 7 — to be determined…