Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself


Melody Beattie - 1986
    The healing touchstone of millions, this modern classic by one of America's best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life.Is someone else's problem your problem? If, like so many others, you've lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to someone else's, you may be codependent--and you may find yourself in this book--Codependent No More.The healing touchstone of millions, this modern classic by one of America's best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life.With instructive life stories, personal reflections, exercises, and self-tests, Codependent No More is a simple, straightforward, readable map of the perplexing world of codependency--charting the path to freedom and a lifetime of healing, hope, and happiness.Melody Beattie is the author of Beyond Codependency, The Language of Letting Go, Stop Being Mean to Yourself, The Codependent No More Workbook and Playing It by Heart.

Relationships


The School of Life - 2016
    Our error is to suppose that we are born knowing how to love and that managing a relationship might, therefore be intuitive and easy. This book starts from a different premise: that love is a skill to be learnt, rather than just an emotion to be felt. It calmly and charmingly takes us around the key issues of relationships, from arguments to sex, forgiveness to communication, making sure that success in love need never again be just a matter of luck.

The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps


Melissa Orlov - 2010
    Going beyond traditional marriage counseling which can often discount the influence of ADHD, this discussion offers advice from the author's personal experience and years of research and identifies patterns of behavior that can hurt marriages—such as nagging, intimacy problems, sudden anger, and memory issues—through the use of descriptions of actual couples and their ADHD struggles and solutions. The first third of the book is dedicated to helping couples identify how ADHD impacts their relationship. The last two-thirds provides a specific set of steps couples can move through to overcome their hurt and anger, once again develop loving ways to interact with each other, and find the joy they’ve lost in their struggles. This book encourages both spouses to become active partners in improving their relationship.

Since Strangling Isn't an Option...: Dealing with Difficult People--Common Problems and Uncommon Solutions


Sandra A. Crowe - 1999
    Readers will learn why dealing with a difficult person doesn't have to ruin their day, the habits that cause conflict, and the techniques that can turn things around. It also gives readers insight into their own power in shaping relationships, and specific advice for handling different personality types. There really is a better way!

Happier at Home: Kiss More, Jump More, Abandon a Project, Read Samuel Johnson, and My Other Experiments in the Practice of Everyday Life


Gretchen Rubin - 2012
    Homesick—why? She was standing right in her own kitchen. She felt homesick, she realized, with love for home itself. “Of all the elements of a happy life,” she thought, “my home is the most important.” In a flash, she decided to undertake a new happiness project, and this time, to focus on home.And what did she want from her home? A place that calmed her, and energized her. A place that, by making her feel safe, would free her to take risks. Also, while Rubin wanted to be happier at home, she wanted to appreciate how much happiness was there already. So, starting in September (the new January), Rubin dedicated a school year—September through May—to making her home a place of greater simplicity, comfort, and love.  In The Happiness Project, she worked out general theories of happiness. Here she goes deeper on factors that matter for home, such as possessions, marriage, time, and parenthood. How can she control the cubicle in her pocket? How might she spotlight her family’s treasured possessions? And it really was time to replace that dud toaster. Each month, Rubin tackles a different theme as she experiments with concrete, manageable resolutions—and this time, she coaxes her family to try some resolutions, as well.  With her signature blend of memoir, science, philosophy, and experimentation, Rubin’s passion for her subject jumps off the page, and reading just a few chapters of this book will inspire readers to find more happiness in their own lives.

DO NOTHING!


Damian Mark Smyth - 2012
    It is the misunderstanding of the ‘function’ of individual thought systems that causes the problems, pain and suffering in the world. This ‘reactive’ thinking interferes with the flow of creative intelligence. When busy thinking subsides, new thought is available, and with it, innovation and resilience. The ‘trick,’ is simply to see how the ‘trick is done’. That’s it, no more. No processes, just an understanding. I point towards this understanding of the ‘human operating system’, which turns cause and effect, completely inside-out.What if you were able to live a perfect, happy life, effortlessly... right now!? What if you discovered the secret that has been talked about by mystics throughout the ages, that was not only incredibly simple but was also accessible to you without doing a thing? What if every area of your life could be improved with one realisation, one thought, one simple understanding? Damian Mark Smyth is a teacher of this understanding and he takes you through the most common misunderstandings and misconceptions to help you realise that humanity has, for the most part, been looking in the wrong direction when it comes to happiness. The ‘outside-in’ world of fame and money is not the way to be fulfilled - just look at the amount of rich and famous people in rehab and therapy. His approach is more in tune with who you really are. From relationships to money, the business environment, parenting to sport and even addiction, Damian will show you where the secret lies and how you too can access it.Here is what readers are saying about ‘DO NOTHING!’: I can’t believe how powerful this book is! “I’m impressed with this book. Read DO NOTHING! The wonders of the internal universe await.” Jack Pransky Ph.D (Author of ‘Somebody Should Have Told Us!’)This book is amazing!This is not the kind of book that teaches you, it is a book that TOUCHES you...I am now a big step closer to loving life.DO NOTHING! goes straight to your heart, it is a piece of music as much as a written text.It is very, very CONTAGIOUS!!! There is a happiness virus somewhere in the text! You open the book & have no choice but to get infected by itDO NOTHING’S chapter on money is one of the more useful things I’ve read in my life.Without this book, my life would be very different right now (and not in a good way!).DO NOTHING! is the missing link! Ever had trouble with stress, depression, anxiety, doubt or fear? This book will revolutionise the way you live.I just wish I’d read it earlier!! This is what the author, Damian Mark Smyth says himself about the Principles outlined within the pages of ‘DO NOTHING!’: “There are three formless facts that create our reality from moment to moment. Like gravity, they exist whether we believe them or not. With them, not only do we create our world through our thoughts, but we also create our world ‘of thought’. Merely by having an understanding of how they work allows us freedom from worry, stress and fear and opens us up to the infinite potential of the universe through creativity, compassion and love. And the way to access this inner source of wisdom is to DO NOTHING! Because we already have it. As the saying goes: “You are already enlightened, you just don’t know it yet...”

Say Goodbye to Crazy: How to Get Rid of His Crazy Ex and Restore Sanity to Your Life


Tara Palmatier - 2015
    It will give you the answers you need to live a life free of chaos, anger and frustration. Say Goodbye to Crazy is one of the few books that addresses how to cope with a hostile, angry ex-wife whose destructive behavior is overlooked by the courts, the society and sometimes, even your own husband. It is a life-saver. Helen Smith, PhD, forensic psychologist and author of Men on Strike

I Hear You: The Surprisingly Simple Skill Behind Extraordinary Relationships


Michael S. Sorensen - 2017
     Whether you’re looking to improve your relationship with your spouse, navigate difficult conversations at work, or connect on a deeper level with friends and family, this book delivers simple, practical, proven techniques for improving any relationship in your life. Mastery of this simple skill will enable you to: • Calm (and sometimes even eliminate) the concerns, fears, and uncertainties of others • Increase feelings of love, respect, and appreciation in your romantic relationships • Quickly resolve, or even prevent, arguments • Help others become open to your point of view • Give advice and feedback that sticks • Provide support and encouragement to others, even when you don’t know how to “fix” the problem • And much more In short: this skill is powerful. Give the principles and practices in this book a chance and you’ll be amazed at the difference they can make.

Sane: How I shaped up my mind, improved my mental strength and found calm


Emma Young - 2015
    Disappointed that her mind does not always deal well with the pressures of modern life, Emma decided to go on mind-toning journey.Is it possible to tone your mind just as you can tone your body so it becomes more resilient and better prepared to deal with what life throws at you?By looking at some of the new and tried and tested techniques, from meditation to mental preparation involved in extreme sports and military training, Emma has devised a programme that will help everyone achieve mental stability.

Becoming a Person of Influence: How to Positively Impact the Lives of Others


John C. Maxwell - 1997
    Learn the tactics to interact more effectively with people, and watch your organizational success go off the charts!In Becoming a Person of Influence, Maxwell and Dornan help people, regardless of their occupation, reach their full influential potential:Managers will see their employees respond with new enthusiasmParents will connect with their children on a deeper levelCoaches will see players blossomPastors will reach more peopleSalespeople will break recordsAuthors Maxwell and Dornan have spent most of their lives raising up influencers. With humor, heart, and unique insight, they share what they have gained from decades of experiences in both business and nonprofit areas. Their insights are practical and easy to apply to everyday life.

The Art of Showing Up: How to Be There for Yourself and Your People


Rachel Wilkerson Miller - 2020
    What’s more, we’re living in an uncharted social landscape with new conventions on how to relate—one where actual phone calls are reserved for Mom (if anyone), “dropping in” is unheard-of, and “flaking out” is routine.The Art of Showing Up offers a roadmap through this morass to true connection with your friends, your family, and yourself. Author Rachel Wilkerson Miller teaches that “showing up” means connecting with others in a way that makes them feel seen and supported. And that begins with showing up for yourself: recognizing your needs, understanding your physical and mental health, and practicing self-compassion. Only then can you better support other people; witness their joy, pain, and true selves; validate their experiences; and help ease their burden. When “showing up” for others, it’s not the grandest gesture that matters most—it’s how close you come to meeting your loved ones where they really are.

Enchantment: The Art of Changing Hearts, Minds, and Actions


Guy Kawasaki - 2011
    It transforms situations and relationships. It converts hostility into civility and civility into affinity. It changes the skeptics and cynics into the believers and the undecided into the loyal. Enchantment can happen during a retail transaction, a high-level corporate negotiation, or a Facebook update. And when done right, it's more powerful than traditional persuasion, influence, or marketing techniques.Kawasaki argues that in business and personal interactions, your goal is not merely to get what you want but to bring about a voluntary, enduring, and delightful change in other people. By enlisting their own goals and desires, by being likable and trustworthy, and by framing a cause that others can embrace, you can change hearts, minds, and actions. For instance, enchantment is what enabled . . .A Peace Corps volunteer to finesse a potentially violent confrontation with armed guerrillas.A small cable channel (E!) to win the TV broadcast rights to radio superstar Howard Stern.??A seemingly crazy new running shoe (Vibram Five Fingers) to methodically build a passionate customer base.??A Canadian crystal maker (Nova Scotian Crystal) to turn observers into buyers.This book explains all the tactics you need to prepare and launch an enchantment campaign; to get the most from both push and pull technologies; and to enchant your customers, your employees, and even your boss. It shows how enchantment can turn difficult decisions your way, at times when intangibles mean more than hard facts. It will help you overcome other people's entrenched habits and defy the not-always-wise "wisdom of the crowd."Kawasaki's lessons are drawn from his tenure at one of the most enchanting organizations of all time, Apple, as well as his decades of experience as an entrepreneur and venture capitalist. There are few people in the world more qualified to teach you how to enchant people.As Kawasaki writes, "Want to change the world? Change caterpillars into butterflies? This takes more than run-of-the-mill relationships. You need to convince people to dream the same dream that you do." That's a big goal, but one that's possible for all of us.

Mind Games: Emotionally Manipulative Tactics Partners Use to Control Relationships and Force the Upper Hand


Pamela Kole - 2015
     Mind Games uncovers a host of underhanded, sneaky, and malicious emotional manipulation tactics that manipulators and abusers use to beat you down and control you. We might all be able to recognize blatant abuse, but when we’re emotionally invested, it’s tough to see the little signs that are in front of our faces sometimes. They’ll lead to you feeling worthless and vulnerable, making it almost impossible to truly leave your situation. In this book, I identify many common tactics that you may be intimately and sadly familiar with, complete with real life examples for each to help you identify them in your daily life. What emotionally manipulative tactics will you learn to identify and stop? * Gaslighting and telling you that your concern is an overreaction, or quite simply wrong. * How the silent treatment is used as punishment and forces compliance. * Playing the victim and how it transforms your issues into guilt and pity. * Your abuser's time machine and how they use it to their advantage. More importantly: * An analysis of the psychology behind why your partner acts they way they do... and why you stay. * Guidelines for how to deal with a partner that is your manipulator and abuser. * Why your abuser loves controlling you, not necessarily you. Emotional manipulation tactics are still abuse, even if there are no physical signs. Gain the knowledge and subsequent courage you need to leave your situation and find true happiness, not someone else's definition of it. Learn to detect when your abuser is not acting in your best interest, and exactly how they make you believe that they are. Start re-writing the rules to your abuser's mind games.

Compelling People: The Hidden Qualities That Make Us Influential


John Neffinger - 2013
    But most of us don’t really think we can have the kind of magnetism or charisma that we associate with someone like Bill Clinton or Oprah Winfrey unless it comes naturally.   Now, in Compelling People, which is already being taught at Harvard and Columbia Business Schools, John Neffinger and Matthew Kohut show that this isn’t something we have to be born with—it’s something we can learn. Expanding on the themes in their co-authored Harvard Business Review cover story “Connect, Then Lead,” they trace the path to influence through a balance of strength (the root of respect) and warmth (the root of affection). Each seems simple, but only a few of us figure out the tricky task of projecting both at once. The ability to master this dynamic is so rare that we celebrate and elevate those people who have managed to do it.  Drawing on cutting-edge social science research as well as their own work with Fortune 500 executives, members of Congress, TED speakers, and Nobel Prize winners, Neffinger and Kohut reveal:  The common thread connecting Machiavelli and Martin Luther King The secret technique behind the success of Bill Clinton, Ann Richards and Denzel Washington—one that you can use today How looks affect our career prospects The single best strategy for getting someone to agree with you Compelling People explains how we size each other up—and how we can learn to win the admiration, respect, and affection we desire.