Regardless of religion, race, sex, sexuality or nationality. He hates all of you. Basically, you are fucked." God is pissed off. He has run out of patience with humans and decided that our time is over. We've had our chance and its back to the drawing board. "Fuck the lot of them" is his newest gospel. Mo, and Jay, best Friends who've fucked up in the past, beg him for one more chance to get the humans back on track. Alongside Mr Saluzar, the head of a global charity foundation, and Nick, The Fallen Angel, they hurtle towards Armageddon and their one chance to prove God wrong. They have seven days to save us. On The Seventh Day contains strong language and religious irreverence which some may find offensive. Irreverent dark humour from the author of Lanarkshire Strays and the dEaDINBURGH series.

    Their children’s home Marshall’s is full of love and laughter, and a world away from their terrible ordeal of being sold to Una Reed for five shillings.There are many more children who still need a home, especially in a world where the workhouse is the last option for desperate families, and so Minnie makes it her mission to build Marshall’s into a refuge for all the waifs and strays. But kind hearts can be taken advantage of, and before long, Marshall’s in under attack. Can Minnie and Billy keep their family together and keep all the children safe, or will they be torn apart again? The Queen of the Black Country sagas is back with a heart-warming, unputdownable and unforgettable tale of triumph against the odds. Perfect for fans of Val Wood and Lyn Andrews.

    The compendium includes many of Ryan's previously unpublished parodies.

    In this lively collection, learn how an ordinary young man, Mahesh Das, became the beloved Raja Birbal we all know today, and how he uses his famous wit, time and again, to build a ‘celestial palace’ for Emperor Akbar, order a census of crows, trap a thief using a magic bamboo, and much more.Replete with wisdom and wit, and brought to life by Tapas Guha’s beautiful illustrations, this clever collection of stories also offers valuable life lessons hidden beneath its humour.

    The standardized menu for the The Cheesecake Factory restaurant chain.

    Follow the flailing escapades of maverick music manager Campbell Ouiniette at the Calgary Folk Festival, as he leaves a trail of empty liquor bottles, cigarette butts, bruised egos, and obliterated relationships behind him. His top headlining act has abandoned him for the Big Time. In a fit of self-delusion or pure genius (or perhaps a bit of both), Ouiniette devises an intricate scam, a last hurrah in an attempt to redeem himself in the eyes of his girlfriend, the music industry, and the rest of the world. He reveals his path of destruction in his own transparently self-justifying, explosive, profane words, with digressions into the Edmonton hardcore punk rock scene, the Yugoslavian Civil War, and other epicentres of chaos.

    It's nothing like the suburb you might live in . . . Unless, that is, an insane, Listerine-guzzling Realtor sold you your house? Or perhaps your postman happens to have a disturbing relationship with his claw hammer? A grieving Dan LaBarbara knows something is different in Helltown as soon as he comes back home. Yeah, sure, the town always been a little off. You can feel that about the place, like if you stepped into a house whose only occupants were freshly murdered corpses in an upstairs bedroom. But this is something else entirely. Standing in his little brother Barbie's basement workshop, holding one of those dioramas Barbie's been building since the accident, the ones that seem to move when you hold them, Dan can feel Barbie's terror. Barbie must know something is coming, something big, something evil. He's trying to warn Dan in the only way he knows. Why else would Barbie build a diorama depicting a man-sized version of a cartoon rabbit with bloody teeth about to devour a trembling teenager? Why else would he spend so much time crafting an intricate model of Death standing over a pimply teenager in the school library? And let's not even talk about that little model of the mob of undead surrounding the massive tower of vicious black spines behind the high school. Hilltown has a story to tell, and the lonely brain-damaged man who builds magical dioramas in his basement workshop has been telling it all along. As the evil closes in around them, Dan and his new love interest Jessica must do the impossible: save everyone one in Hilltown before it's too late.

    Tour.

    Dumb crooks, celebrities gone bad, unsolved mysteries, odd laws, and more—Strange Crime has plenty of stories that will make you ask yourself, “What could they possibly have been thinking?” This easily portable paperback book is ideal for readers on the go. Take it to school, to work, to jury duty!

    Why else would you be looking at this book? If you have ever wanted to see behind the front lines of retail, this is the book for you. If you want to validate your own experiences in retail, this is the book for you. If you just want to laugh at humorous things from funny people, this is the book for you. Packed full of true short stories from working in one of these super stores, only one conclusion can be reached in the end: Wal-Mart is the craziest place on Earth!

    When she reaches her unplanned destination, self acceptance, you’ll shout hallelujah!

    

    Joiner, Jr. This is action, adventure and gunplay as only Joiner can write it! Ride with the author who gave you “The Legend of Jake Jackson” and “Morgan Porter.” You won’t regret it! When she was 7 years old, Angel saw her father brutally murder her mother. She was adopted by U.S. Marshal Caleb Jacobs and his wife Bonnie. Angel didn’t want to be a schoolteacher like her new Ma. Angel wanted to be a lawman like her new Pa. Outlaws and renegades didn’t believe Deputy U.S. Marshal Angel Jacobs was for real. They learned the truth the hard way at the end of her smoking Colt.

    Neglected by his parents his whole life, he’s finally found the family that he’s always wanted at the shop. He thinks he’s got everything that he needs...until Darcy walks into the shop.One look at the shy girl with the kind eyes and the curvy body of a goddess and Atlas is hooked. Now, he just needs to show Darcy that he’s here to stay.Mischa:Love, romance, dating. Mischa Jennings wants no part of any of it. He’s seen up close and personal how love can ruin your life and he’s vowed to stay far away from that emotion. Armed with a set of rules to keep him safe, he’s been going through life just fine. Then Indie Hearst comes bouncing into Eye Candy Ink and turns his whole world upside down.Suddenly, he’s breaking every one of his rules, but it’s okay. He’s not even close to falling for Indie.Right?Sam:Sam Kavan has grown up learning to be tough, at least on the outside. Like everyone else at Eye Candy Ink, she’s not interested in falling in love. In fact, after a string of failed dates, she's grown disillusioned with dating. She doesn't want to go out with boys who send her dick pics or who text at midnight looking to hook up. She wants someone that she can rely on—someone who loves and wants her for her. She wants a real man.Then she meets Maxwell Schulz, and she wonders if she’s finally met her match.Zeke:Zeke Miller is the owner of Eye Candy Ink and the father figure to everyone at the shop. He’s spent years building Eye Candy Ink into what it is today. While others dated and settled down, he worked, honing his skills until he’s one of the best and most sought after tattoo artists in the world. At thirty-six, he thinks his time to meet someone has passed and he’s resigned to being happy with the family that he’s found at his shop.Then Trixie Clemonte comes into Eye Candy Ink. She has all of his protective instincts kicking in. But none of them are fatherly.Nico:Nico Miller is the quiet, silent type. With ten years of experience, he’s probably the best artist at the shop. He's a giant at 6'8" and built like a linebacker with tattoos covering his neck and torso. Most people are a little afraid of him when they first meet him, but it doesn’t take long to see that while he might look scary, with his almost permanent frown, tattoos, and size, he was actually a giant teddy bear.Most of the time, he can’t wait for people to leave, but one encounter with Edie, and he doesn’t want to let her go. Will he be able to convince her that settling down with him doesn’t mean settling?

     The Hussle and Heart series, dedicated to the late Nipsey Hussle, travels to the slums of Channing City and places a magnifying glass on the lives of the biggest hustlers with the biggest hearts.