Bad Mother: A Chronicle of Maternal Crimes, Minor Calamities, and Occasional Moments of Grace


Ayelet Waldman - 2009
    If you discipline, you’re buying them a spot on the shrink’s couch; if you let them run wild, they will be into drugs by seventh grade. If you buy organic, you’re spending their college fund; if you don’t, you’re risking all sorts of allergies and illnesses.Is it any wonder so many women refer to themselves at one time or another as “a bad mother”? Ayelet Waldman says it’s time for women to get over it and get on with it, in a book that is sure to spark the same level of controversy as her now legendary Modern Love piece, in which she confessed to loving her husband more than her children.Covering topics as diverse as the hysteria of competitive parenting (Whose toddler can recite the planets in order from the sun?), the relentless pursuits of the Bad Mother police, balancing the work-family dynamic, and the bane of every mother’s existence (homework, that is), Bad Mother illuminates the anxieties that riddle motherhood today, while providing women with the encouragement they need to give themselves a break.

Parenting Beyond Pink & Blue: How to Raise Your Kids Free of Gender Stereotypes


Christia Spears Brown - 2014
    Without meaning to, we constantly color-code children, segregating them by gender based on their presumed interests. Our social dependence on these norms has far-reaching effects, such as leading girls to dislike math or increasing aggression in boys. In this practical guide, developmental psychologist (and mother of two) Christia Spears Brown uses science-based research to show how over-dependence on gender can limit kids, making it harder for them to develop into unique individuals. With a humorous, fresh, and accessible perspective, Parenting Beyond Pink & Blue addresses all the issues that contemporary parents should consider—from gender-segregated birthday parties and schools to sports, sexualization, and emotional intelligence. This guide empowers parents to help kids break out of pink and blue boxes to become their authentic selves.

The Milk Memos: How Real Moms Learned to Mix Business with Babies-and How You Can, Too


Cate Colburn-Smith - 2007
     It all began when IBM manager Cate Colburn-Smith sat down in the company's employee lactation room, shed a few silent tears, and wrote the following on a paper towel: I'm a new mom and today is my first day back at work. Is anyone else using this room? Right away women responded, and the paper towel was eventually replaced by a series of notebooks, in which women offered one another advice and support on juggling work and a newborn. Based on the original notebooks, The Milk Memos is a heartwarming, encouraging (and often hilarious!) guide to working motherhood. It's one of the most existential moments any woman will face: sitting in a small room tucked away in the bowels of your company, pumping breast milk for a child so close to your heart-yet, at that moment, so far away. The Milk Memos records the voices of mothers who, while struggling with the difficulties of blending their two lives, prove that women don't have to choose between work and family. Their thoughts on how it can be done will inspire women everywhere. This invaluable book weaves the actual Milk Memos journal entries with information-packed sections on such topics of great concern to working moms as: - finding a private place to pump breast milk at work and establishing a routine that you can maintain despite your busy workday; - establishing the right daycare solution; - getting a decent night's sleep with a new baby so that you can shine (or at least glimmer!) during business hours; and - negotiating flextime, part-time, or a job share with an employer. The ultimate gift for any new mom who will soon return to work, The Milk Memos is destined to become a classic on the parenting shelf.

The Opposite of Spoiled: Raising Kids Who Are Grounded, Generous, and Smart About Money


Ron Lieber - 2015
    Children are hyper-aware of money, and they have scores of questions about its nuances. But when parents shy away from the topic, they lose a tremendous opportunity—not just to model the basic financial behaviors that are increasingly important for young adults but also to imprint lessons about what the family truly values.Written in a warm, accessible voice, grounded in real-world experience and stories from families with a range of incomes, The Opposite of Spoiled is both a practical guidebook and a values-based philosophy. The foundation of the book is a detailed blueprint for the best ways to handle the basics: the tooth fairy, allowance, chores, charity, saving, birthdays, holidays, cell phones, checking accounts, clothing, cars, part-time jobs, and college tuition. It identifies a set of traits and virtues that embody the opposite of spoiled, and shares how to embrace the topic of money to help parents raise kids who are more generous and less materialistic.But The Opposite of Spoiled is also a promise to our kids that we will make them better with money than we are. It is for all of the parents who know that honest conversations about money with their curious children can help them become more patient and prudent, but who don’t know how and when to start.

Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child


John M. Gottman - 1997
    But children also need to master their emotions. Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child is a guide to teaching children to understand and regulate their emotional world. And as acclaimed psychologist and researcher John Gottman shows, once they master this important life skill, emotionally intelligent children will enjoy increased self-confidence, greater physical health, better performance in school, and healthier social relationships. Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child will equip parents with a five-step “emotion coaching” process that teaches how to: -Be aware of a child's emotions -Recognize emotional expression as an opportunity for intimacy and teaching -Listen empathetically and validate a child's feelings -Label emotions in words a child can understand -Help a child come up with an appropriate way to solve a problem or deal with an upsetting issue or situation Written for parents of children of all ages, Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child will enrich the bonds between parent and child and contribute immeasurably to the development of a generation of emotionally healthy adults.

Buddhism for Mothers: A Calm Approach to Caring for Yourself and Your Children


Sarah Napthali - 2003
    Offered are ways for mothers to reconnect with their inner selves and become calmer and happier—with the recognition that a happier mother will be a better parent. This realistic look at motherhood acknowledges the sorrows as well as the joys of mothering and offers real and achievable coping strategies for mothers to renew their lives on a deep level.

The Informed Parent: A Science-Based Resource for Your Child's First Four Years


Tara Haelle - 2016
    But more and more parents and parents-to-be prefer to make up their own minds, based on the latest findings as well as their own preferences. Science writers and parents themselves, Tara Haelle and Emily Willingham have sifted through research studies on dozens of essential topics, and distill them in this essential and engaging book. In the era of questionable Internet "facts" and parental oversharing on social media sites, it's more important than ever to find credible sources of information in order to make the most informed decisions. This book fills that gap.

Momma Zen: Walking the Crooked Path of Motherhood


Karen Maezen Miller - 2006
    Momma Zen takes readers on a transformative journey, charting a mother’s growth beyond naive expectations and disorientation to finding fulfillment in ordinary tasks, developing greater self-awareness and acceptance—to the gradual discovery of “maternal bliss,” a state of abiding happiness and ease that is available to us all.In her gentle and reassuring voice, Karen Miller convinces us that ancient and authentic spiritual lessons can be as familiar as a lullaby, as ordinary as pureed peas, and as frequent as a sleepless night. She offers encouragement for the hard days, consolation for the long haul, and the lightheartedness every new mom needs to face the crooked path of motherhood straight on.

Breasts: A Natural and Unnatural History


Florence Williams - 2012
    But in the modern world, the breast is changing. Breasts are getting bigger, arriving earlier, and attracting newfangled chemicals. Increasingly, the odds are stacked against us in the struggle with breast cancer, even among men. What makes breasts so mercurial—and so vulnerable?In this informative and highly entertaining account, intrepid science reporter Florence Williams sets out to uncover the latest scientific findings from the fields of anthropology, biology, and medicine. Her investigation follows the life cycle of the breast from puberty to pregnancy to menopause, taking her from a plastic surgeon’s office where she learns about the importance of cup size in Texas to the laboratory where she discovers the presence of environmental toxins in her own breast milk. The result is a fascinating exploration of where breasts came from, where they have ended up, and what we can do to save them.

Homeward Bound: Why Women are Embracing the New Domesticity


Emily Matchar - 2013
    A generation of smart, highly educated young people are spending their time knitting, canning jam, baking cupcakes, gardening, and more (and blogging about it, of course), embracing the labor-intensive domestic tasks their mothers and grandmothers eagerly shrugged off. They’re questioning whether regular jobs are truly fulfilling and whether it’s okay to turn away from the ambitions of their parents’ generation.How did this happen? And what does it all mean? In Homeward Bound, acclaimed journalist Emily Matchar takes a long, hard look at both the inspiring appeal and the potential dangers of this trend she calls the New Domesticity, exploring how it could be reshaping the role of women in society and what the consequences may be for all of us.This groundbreaking reporting on the New Domesticity is guaranteed to transform our notions of women in today’s society and add a new layer to the ongoing discussion of whether women can—or should—have it all.

Why Love Matters: How Affection Shapes a Baby's Brain


Sue Gerhardt - 2003
    She shows how the development of the brain can affect future emotional well being, and goes on to look at specific early 'pathways' that can affect the way we respond to stress and lead to conditions such as anorexia, addiction, and anti-social behaviour.Why Love Matters is a lively and very accessible interpretation of the latest findings in neuroscience, psychology, psychoanalysis and biochemistry. It will be invaluable to psychotherapists and psychoanalysts, mental health professionals, parents and all those concerned with the central importance of brain development in relation to many later adult difficulties.

Parenting Without Borders: Surprising Lessons Parents Around the World Can Teach Us


Christine Gross-Loh - 2013
    Meanwhile the battle over whether parents are to blame for fostering a generation of helpless kids rages on. Christine Gross-Loh (who raised her young children in Japan for five years) exposes the hidden, culturally-determined norms we have about “good parenting,” and asks, are there parenting strategies that other countries are getting right that we are not? This book takes us from Finland, and Sweden to Germany, France, Japan, China, Italy, and more, and examines how parents successfully foster resilience, creativity, independence and academic excellence in their children. Revealing the surprising ways in which culture shapes our parenting, Gross-Loh also offers objective, research-based insight into what strategies are best for children and why.Among her eye-opening findings:Co-sleeping, typical in most of the world’s families, may promote independence in kids.American-style “hoverparenting” is unique in the world and can damage a child’s resilience.Finnish children, who rank among the world’s highest academic achievers, enjoy multiple recesses a day.Our obsession with self-esteem—a concept that doesn’t exist in many countries—may limit a child’s potentialAt last bringing empirical research to the debate, Parenting Without Borders offers new and provocative thinking on the secrets to raising a confident and capable generation.

What to Read When: The Books and Stories to Read with Your Child--and All the Best Times to Read Them


Pam Allyn - 2009
    In many ways, books provide the first opportunity for children to begin to reflectively engage with and understand the world around them. Not only can parents entertain their child and convey the beauty of language through books, they can also share their values and create lasting connections.Here, Allyn offers parents and caregivers essential advice on choosing appropriate titles for their children--taking into account a child's age, attention ability, gender, and interests-- along with techniques for reading aloud effectively. But what sets this book apart is the extraordinary, annotated list of more than three hundred titles suitable for the pivotal moments in a child's life. With category themes ranging from friendship and journeys to thankfulness, separations, silliness, and spirituality, What to Read When is a one-of-a-kind guide to how parents can best inspire children through reading together. In addition, Pam Allyn includes an indispensable "Reader's Ladder" section, with recommendations for children at every stage from birth to age ten. With the author's warm and engaging voice throughout, discussion questions to encourage in-depth conversations, as well as advice on helping kids make the transition to independent reading, this book will help shape thoughtful, creative, and curious children, imparting a love of reading that will last a lifetime.These Penguin Young Reader's Books are referenced in What to Read WhenSylvia Jean: Drama Queen by Lisa Campbell Ernst (Penguin Young Reader's Group: 2005)Two Is For Twins, by Wendy Cheyette Lewison, illustrations by Hiroe Nakata (Penguin Young Readers: 2006)Remember Grandma? by Laura Langston (Penguin Group (USA): May 2004)Soul Looks Back in Wonder compiled by Tom Feelings (Puffin Books)Time of Wonder by Robert McCloskey (Penguin Books USA, Incorporated: December 1957)When I was Young in the Mountainsby Cynthia Rylant illustrated by Diane Goode (Penguin Young Readers Group: January 1993)Nana Upstairs and Nana Downstairs by Tomie DePaola (Puffin Books, an imprint of Penguin Books, Inc.:1973)Good Night, Good Knight by Shelly Moore Thomas, illustrations by Jennifer Plecas (Penguin Young Readers Group: 2002)

Permission to Parent: How to Raise Your Child with Love and Limits


Robin Berman - 2014
    Children have become the center of the universe, ruling the roost with some serious ramifications for their wellbeing. By trying to constantly please their children and make them happy, parents are actually making their children anxious. In attempting to veer from the strictness of their own upbringing, many parents have gone too far the other way, showering praise onto their children in the hope of increasing self-esteem, forgetting that self-control is a key to instilling self-confidence. Dr. Robin Berman’s extensive clinical experience has helped parents and children navigate the emotional and psychological minefields of family dynamics. In this essential parenting guide, she strikes the perfect balance of advice, anecdote, and research, explaining why parents need to be in charge and providing the tools they can use to give their children what they really need: limits, time, and more love. Ten Tips from Permission to ParentParenting is not a democracy. Rules make kids feel safe.Don’t be emotionally bullied by your child. Emotionally wimpy parenting leads to emotionally fragile kids.A child who has too much power often becomes anxious.Catering to your child’s every whim can lead to a child who is self-centered and lacks empathy.Look long-term at a child who hasn’t faced consequences for behavior and, therefore, never learned accountability: Would you want to date this person as an adult?If you say, “If you do that one more time,” mean it. Consistent follow-through is essential for a child’s emotional safety and your sanity.Keep your eye on the long-term goal of raising a lovely child. Remember your mantra: Hate me now, thank me later.Talk less, give fewer choices, keep it simple. Less is clearly more.No is a complete sentence. No does not begin a negotiation.Reverse negotiate. The more they argue, the less they get. It works like a charm.

Playful Learning: Develop Your Child's Sense of Joy and Wonder


Mariah Bruehl - 2011
    From the time they are born they seek out information about the world around them in an effort to construct meaning and further their development. While children have an inherent drive to make sense of their reality, parents have a unique opportunity to harness their children’s curiosity and channel it into a love of learning. Playful learning is the magic that takes place when we meld a child’s sense of joy and wonder with thoughtfully planned learning experiences. Through easy-to-implement, hands-on projects you can engage your child in fun and creative ways that encourage learning and impart the joy of discovery. With a little bit of information and forethought, you can play a pivotal role in the cognitive and creative development of your child Mariah Bruehl has worked in the field of education for over a decade. She has taught in the classroom, developed curriculum in many different subject areas, trained teachers, and implemented programs across many grade levels. She is the mother of two girls and the owner of Playful Learning—a retail space and education center in Sag Harbor. Learn more at www.playfulearning.com.