Choose Your Own Disaster


Dana Schwartz - 2018
     Join Dana Schwartz on a journey revisiting all of the awful choices she made in her early twenties through the internet's favorite method of self-knowledge: the quiz. Part-memoir, part-VERY long personality test, Choose Your Own Disaster is a manifesto about the millennial experience and modern feminism and how the easy advice of "you can be anything you want!" is actually pretty fucking difficult when there are so many possible versions of yourself it seems like you could be. Dana has no idea who she is, but at least she knows she's a Carrie, a Ravenclaw, a Raphael, a Belle, a former emo kid, a Twitter addict, and a millennial just trying her best. This long-form personality quiz manages to combine humor with unflinching honesty as one young woman tries to find herself amid the many, many choices that your twenties have to offer.

More of Dave Barry's Greatest Hits


Dave Barry - 1996
    What Dave Barry did for American history in Dave Barry Slept Here and for getting older in Dave Barry Turns Forty, he does for everything else in America! Tupperware ladies, eighties people and leisure-concept salesmen beware: Dave Barry is on the loose and no one is safe!

Ooh! What a Lovely Pair: Our Story


Anthony McPartlin - 2009
    An idiosyncratic collection of vivid observations, colourful reminiscence and charming digressions, Ant and Dec's book is packed with comical anecdotes, and will give millions of fans an insight into the genuine intimacy and refreshing sense of humour that the two TV icons share.

The Day I (Almost) Killed Two Gretzkys: And Other Off The Wall Stories About Sports...And Life


James Duthie - 2010
    Little did I know he'd turn the experience into one of the best books on sports that I've read in a long time."- Wayne Gretzky"Tragedy is easy. Comedy is hard. Sports comedy is even harder, but James Duthie, who we now know is as comfortable in front of a keyboard as he is a camera, treads whimsically through a sports landscape that certainly needs a smile. His is a biting wit, guaranteed to leave teeth marks."- Michael Farber, "Sports Illustrated"" If you like James Duthie on TSN, you're in for a treat. He's just as clever and witty in print. James is simply a great storyteller whose creative style will make you smile over and over."- Dave Naylor, The "Globe and Mail"" ""The Quiz sucks but Duthie's book is fantastic. He is one warped writer, but genius."- John Tortorella, New York Rangers coach" Duthie writes the way I played: With an edge, but never forgetting the game is supposed to be fun. This book is a ton of fun."- Jeremy Roenick, former NHL star"This guy does it all-he writes as well as he does television. That same somewhat aberrant sense of humour leaps off the pages. Sports fans will love this book!"- Brian Burke, Toronto Maple Leafs GM"I don't have kids nor can I legally admit to owning a monkey, but I do love hockey and Duthie manages to make them all work together. He effortlessly modernizes sports writing while respectfully tipping his hat to the old school."- George Stroumboulopoulos, Hockey Fan and Host of CBC's "George Stroumboulopoulos Tonight"So what's this book about? Well...This book is about hockey. And golf. And the Olympic Games. And being a broadcaster, a sports fan, a father, husband, and son. And having an unhealthy fascination with Anna Kournikova.It's a collection of things that marched through James Duthie's head over the years and spilled out into his weekly columns, selected, collected, and randomized for your reading pleasure. It's also educational!You'll learn about: Sidney Crosby's secrets Where you rank on The Jeter Meter of male success Why hockey's loser point has to go The best four-legged athlete ever What the cliches that come out of athletes' mouths really mean What it's like to be upstaged by a monkey And yes, how Duthie almost killed two Gretzkys on the same day.James Duthie has been writing columns about hockey, sport in general, and his own twisted view of the world for over a decade. This book is the first and only collection of some of his most popular and controversial columns, with several brand new, previously unpublished pieces. In "The Day I (Almost) Killed Two Gretzkys," he brings his famous sense of humour, deep hockey knowledge, and his passion for sports of all kinds to fans and readers everywhere- no matter what team you cheer for.Often hilarious, sometimes insightful, occasionally touching and always passionate, Duthie's off-kilter view of sports and life shows how the spirit of sport unites us all.

Him & Me


Jack Whitehall - 2013
    Written in two distinctive styles, it reflects the larger-than-life personalities of its authors, Jack and Michael Whitehall.'This book is a portrait of the pretty odd relationship I have with my elderly father. It's given me an opportunity to share memories of him losing his temper with foreigners on holidays, being rude to my mother's family at Christmas and failing epically during the fathers' race at my prep school. He's also written some stories about me, but can I just say, before you read anything, that I recall being a calm, well-behaved and learned child, not the intellectually subnormal, mal-coordinated dipshit that he paints me as. Nor am I, as he suggests inside, a sex addict, a flasher or a Scientologist.' - Jack'How dare Jack refer to me as elderly! People always tell me how young I look for my age. In this book, I have at last been able to recount the many occasions when I have been let down by my only son. He failed on the stage, the sports field and he even screwed up the interview for his first boarding school by pretending he had mental health issues. Despite being practically illiterate, he tells stories about me, strewn with grammatical errors and peppered with endless exaggerations and lies. I was a kind, doting father, who guided his son through his formative years with love, care and respect.' - Michael'I'm not your only son, what about Barnaby?''Oh yes, I forgot about Barnaby.'Packed with anecdotes, some embarrassing and indiscreet, many warm and touching, Him & Me is lavishly illustrated with family photographs and Jack's original illustrations. Friends, relatives, neighbours, teachers, actors, none are safe once Jack and Michael have opened up the Whitehall archives and shared their hilarious memories with us.

I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell


Tucker Max - 2006
    I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. —from the IntroductionActual reader feedback: "I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don't believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist." "I'll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You're an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you." Now with 16 Pages of Photos and a New Introduction

Morrie: In His Own Words


Morris S. Schwartz - 1999
    Ever the teacher, in his last year, as his battle with the fatal illness amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS), or Lou Gehrig's Disease, gradually weakened him, he appeared on three memorable "Nightline" programs with Ted Koppel, simply titled "Morrie," and captivated millions of viewers across the country with his spirit and compassion.Before he died, Morrie finished the manuscript for this book, which was originally titled Letting Go. He saw it as his greatest teaching opportunity. Whether you or a loved one is healthy or ill, young or old, there is invaluable wisdom here that can enrich your life. From "handling frustration" and "reaching acceptance" to "relating to others" and "being kind to yourself," Morrie's life-affirming insights help you take stock of where you are now and where you may want to be. Morrie: In His Own Words will have a lasting impact on whoever reads it. It is Morrie's invaluable legacy to us all.

"Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman!": Adventures of a Curious Character


Richard P. Feynman - 1985
    Here he recounts in his inimitable voice his experience trading ideas on atomic physics with Einstein and Bohr and ideas on gambling with Nick the Greek; cracking the uncrackable safes guarding the most deeply held nuclear secrets; accompanying a ballet on his bongo drums; painting a naked female toreador. In short, here is Feynman's life in all its eccentric—a combustible mixture of high intelligence, unlimited curiosity, and raging chutzpah.

Big Girl: How I Gave Up Dieting and Got a Life


Kelsey Miller - 2015
    She'd been fighting her un-thin body since early childhood, and at 29, she finally hit bottom. No diet could transform her body or her life. With the help of an intuitive eating coach and fitness professionals, she learned how to eat based on her body's instincts and exercise sustainably, without obsessing over calories burned. But, with each thrilling step toward a healthy future, she had to contend with the painful truths of her past. BIG GIRL chronicles Kelsey's journey into self-loathing and disordered eating--and out of it. This is a memoir for anyone who's grappled with a distorted body image, food issues, or a dysfunctional family. It's for late bloomers and the not-yet-bloomed. It's for everyone who's tried and failed and felt like a big, fat, loser. So, basically, everyone.

Mad Girl


Bryony Gordon - 2016
    It's caused alopecia, bulimia, and drug dependency. And Bryony is sick of it. Keeping silent about her illness has given it a cachet it simply does not deserve, so here she shares her story with trademark wit and dazzling honesty.A hugely successful columnist for the Telegraph, a bestselling author, and a happily married mother of an adorable daughter, Bryony has managed to laugh and live well while simultaneously grappling with her illness. Now it's time for her to speak out. Writing with her characteristic warmth and dark humour, Bryony explores her relationship with her OCD and depression as only she can.Mad Girl is a shocking, funny, unpredictable, heart-wrenching, raw and jaw-droppingly truthful celebration of life with mental illness.

Cautionary Tales


Stephen Tobolowsky - 2011
    He has played everyone from Ned Ryerson in "Groundhog Day" to Sandy Ryerson in "Glee." He has amused thousands with his true stories on "The Tobolowsky Files" at Slashfilm.com. Here he shares some homespun philosophy and more true stories that prove tales of sex, drugs, and rock and roll are often the most humiliating and almost always the most enjoyable.

Roseanne: My Life as a Woman


Roseanne Barr - 1989
    Roseanne is the dramatic American saga, funny and true, of a woman who started with nothing, overcame great diversity, and with the strength of her convictions--and a brilliant wit--triumphed.#Harper & Row.

Big Deal: One Year in the Life of a Professional Poker Player


Anthony Holden - 1990
    He spent days and nights in the poker paradise of Las Vegas, in Malta and Morocco, even shipboard, mingling with the legendary greats, sharpening his game, perfecting his repartee, and learning a great deal about himself in the process. Poker, Holden would insist, is not gambling. Like chess it is a paradigm of life at its most intense, a gladiatorial contest that brings out the best as well as the worst in people. Its heroes, its eccentrics and is comedians stalk the pages of this book, along with all the hair-raising, nail-biting excitement of the games themselves. The book is reissued with a new introduction by the author.

Tall Tales and Wee Stories: The Best of Billy Connolly


Billy Connolly - 2019
    It had been an extraordinary career. When he first started out in the late sixties, Billy played the banjo in the folk clubs of Scotland. Between songs, he would improvise a bit, telling anecdotes from the Clyde shipyard where he'd worked. In the process, he made all kinds of discoveries about what audiences found funny, from his own brilliant mimes to the power of speaking irreverently about politics or explicitly about sex. He began to understand the craft of great storytelling. Soon the songs became shorter and the monologues longer, and Billy quickly became recognised as one of the most exciting comedians of his generation.Billy's routines always felt spontaneous. He never wrote scripts, always creating his comedy freshly on stage in the presence of a live audience. A brilliant comic story might be subsequently discarded, adapted or embellished. A quick observation or short anecdote one night, could become a twenty-minute segment by the next night of a tour.Billy always brought a beautiful sense of the absurd to his shows as he riffed on his family, hecklers, swimming in the North Sea or naked bungee jumping. But his comedy can be laced with anger too. He hates pretentiousness and calls out hypocrisy wherever he sees it. His insights about the human condition have shocked many people, while his unique talent and startling appearance on stage gave him license to say anything he damn well pleased about sex, politics or religion. Billy got away with it because he has always had the popular touch. His comedy spans generations and different social tribes in a way that few others have ever managed. Tall Tales and Wee Stories brings together the very best of Billy's storytelling for the first time and includes his most famous routines including, The Last Supper, Jojoba Shampoo, Incontinence Pants and Shouting at Wildebeest. With an introduction and original illustrations by Billy throughout, it is an inspirational, energetic and riotously funny read, and a fitting celebration of our greatest ever comedian.

Talking Pictures: Images and Messages Rescued from the Past


Ransom Riggs - 2012
    Each image in Talking Pictures reveals a singular, frozen moment in a person’s life, be it joyful, quiet, or steeped in sorrow. Yet the book’s unique depth comes from the writing accompanying each photo: as with the caption revealing how one seemingly random snapshot of a dancing couple captured the first dance of their 40-year marriage, each successive inscription shines like a flashbulb illuminating a photograph’s particular context and lighting up our connection to the past.