For centuries, lovers have found inspiration and advice in the ancient text of the Kama Sutra. Now, Simon Rich -- "one of the funniest writers in America" (The Daily Beast) -- and Farley Katz have unearthed a valuable new document: a guide to the positions most common after marriage. From "the interrupted congress" to "the beaching of the whales," here are the poses, positions, and games married lovers play to keep the spark alive -- and the dishwasher properly loaded. Complete with four-color, full-page illustrations in the style of the original Kama Sutra, but with modern, domestic accoutrements: dirty diapers, TV remotes, and wine glasses aplenty.

    How to Speak Zombie demonstrates how to blend in and avoid being eaten while carrying on with everyday activities like ordering a latte from a zombarista and shopping at a zombie-infested mall. This essential guide features an electronic sound module that demonstrates proper zombie pronunciation ("RAHHHhh!"), helpful text that explores the customs and etiquette of the zombie world, and detailed illustrations that show the undead doing everything from pumping iron to dancing the night away. Deeply informative, this handbook also includes an all-purpose BRAINS button that can be used in any situation, deadly or otherwise.

    

    to a major scandal, they are desperate to show they’ve reformed. Who better to present their redemption to the world than a country vicar with a reputation for being annoyingly good? Reverend Tom Goodman is ousted from his job as a country vicar for allowing a homeless family to stay in the church hall. Meanwhile, a major bank is trying to rescue its image after the latest in a long string of financial scandals. It seems like the perfect match and Goodman is hastily appointed as the bank’s new C.E.O. All they have to do now, is promote him as the new face of Shadeys Bank whilst at the same time, keeping him away from the day-to-day business of dubious banking. However, Tom Goodman has other ideas. He’s not going to be satisfied with being used as an empty puppet for a PR stunt. Unfortunately for Shadeys, Tom is planning on actually making a difference. And so begins an epic battle of wills. The might of a multi-billion pound bank versus a seemingly naïve country vicar. No contest. “Yes Minister meets The Vicar of Dibley.”

    This installment is written in first person, sort of a diary format, as one man recounts his frantic, often hilarious and occasionally dangerous odyssey of preparing for the oncoming Zombie Apocalypse.

    He's on the run with the proceeds of a botched bank robbery. It's all he has. His crew is dead and his getaway car just died on him. He's on foot with the cash when he comes across a two-car pileup. There's no saving the drivers, but he can save himself by stealing one of the wrecked cars. Unfortunately, he boosts the wrong set of wheels. Within an hour of driving off, he develops a rash that eats away at his flesh. No doctor can help him—only the car's original owner. If Straley wants his skin back, he must journey on the road to redemption, which ends in the heart of Central America. Road Rash first appeared in the anthology Butcher Shop Quartet 2. Simon Janus is the horror identity for the award winning thriller writer, Simon Wood. What They Are Saying About Road Rash: "Road Rash is a wild collision of crime caper and supernatural thriller that works on every level. Lightning-paced, darkly funny, deeply creepy, and highly recommended." — Jonathan Maberry, NY Times bestselling author of THE DRAGON FACTORY “Simon Janus understands the darkness inside us all and nails it to the page. Fast-paced and gut-wrenching, pedal-to-the-metal thrills." — Scott Nicholson, author of THE RED CHURCH

    Tired, weak, and nearly broken under the weight of his guilt, he wanders the streets waiting for death to catch up to him. But when he is beset by bandits, he gains a new perspective. Maybe he doesn't have to feel guilty about feeding, after all.Theron - Theron travels by ship to his long ago home of Athens, Greece. He soon discovers the Council of Thirteen has put a price on his head so large every Bachiyr in the city will try to collect it, which leads to a very tense reunion with an old lover.The Ugliest Thing, by Daniel Arenson - Just what is it about the image in the telescope that makes people lose their sanity? Is it worth the risk to see for yourself?Also included is a preview of 61 A.D., the thrilling sequel to David's 2010 horror bestseller, 33 A.D.

    

    This hardcover, double issue is a return to pulp horror comics of the 1950's, but stylized and written for a new generation of horror fans! The book is anchored by the mysterious Blueman, an intimidating phantom that lives in the deepest, darkest recesses of the net. Join him as he tells two spine-tingling tales full of twists and turns! He is The Rake:  Our first story features a creature that's inspired a massive fandom around the web. The Rake is a mysterious beast that appears to people in the night as a dark omen. When the strange entity's presence causes the death of one man's wife, he becomes obsessed with getting payback, but is his quest for vengeance misguided? He Is... is a classic tale of revenge with a sinister twist that will send chills through your body! I Waited Inside Her Closet: The account of a dangerous serial killer and his unhealthy obsession with fame. But there's more than meets the eye in this story. The homicidal maniac's grisly exploits soon lead him to a terrible truth when he comes face to face with something even more terrifying than himself. Pick up this CREATURE DOUBLE-FEATURE and you won't be disappointed!

    Humanity seems lost. The Zombies have taken over. But the crew of Sassafras and True North aren't about to just kneel down and take it.

    Follow the terror and drama in five short stories that will bring you gravely close to your fears. The winds are howling, can you hear the screams? WARNING: Not the famous Stephen King from Maine.

    Volume one was issued with great success, and those voices were released into the wild for reader’s enjoyment. Now, here we are with volume two—some authors will be familiar, while others will be brand new. Collected within this book are stories that span the wide genre that is Horror. Crack open the book and delve in, if you dare.

    Ward, a tier-one operator turned mercenary, has just flung himself off the cargo deck of a doomed C-130. Now he’s out of the Drop Zone and evading the undead as a terrible new breed of hunter enters the Wyrd. But these new, faster predators might not be the only thing to fear in an apocalypse beset by zombies, nukes and killer A.I.’s. One of the last warriors of a collapsed government is planning on putting up some big numbers in this final, ultimate game of Survivor, until he finds a mysterious new companion... a stranger dressed in black.

    Originally published by Palliard Press.

    In "Mercury Rain" a soldier fighting a new enemy learns the importance of holding on to his memories. "Blackwater," the title story of the collection, is an homage to Stephen King's short story, "Graveyard Shift," and it tells the tale of Paul Hawkins, a mine worker who disturbs something terrifying in the Blackwater Hills of Durham, Pennsylvania, in the summer of 1976.