In the London office my new boss Victor tells me I shall be working in a regional office - and he wants me to drive there. I am to deliver Victor's shiny Jaguar: his pride and joy. The office is in Calcutta. This all sounds like fun to me. A month long holiday. How bad can that be I think and decide to invite my friend Douglas to come along for the ride. This will be a road trip to die for I tell him. Victor's P.A. Shirley is the all seeing eye. Nothing gets past here. I have to report in on my progress at key points on the route. Shirley is going to be watching me. 'If you so much as scratch it you're dead.' I laugh, what could possibly go wrong....? well just about everything. We were OK up till Trieste; then a goat got in the car - after that it was downhill all the way to Calcutta.

    We start off in Japan as he’s about to board the cargo ship, and throughout the book flash back to times spent in Amsterdam, Bucharest, Kathmandu, Bangkok and the likes. “I wish I could have written a book this awesome.” – Jack Kerouac Expect plenty of taboo topics, tales of dating misadventures, and honest takes on places like India and Iran. If you like the Momentos series on Niall’s blog, you’ll absolutely love this book. FAQ’s Q. How long is the book? A. 36,506 words on 133 pages. You can read through the whole thing in about three hours. Q. What route did you take from Ireland to Peru? A. Ireland > England > Netherlands > Germany > Switzerland > Austria > Hungary > Romania > Turkey > Iran > UAE > India > Nepal > India > Thailand > Cambodia > Laos > Vietnam > China > Hong Kong > China > Vietnam > Laos > Thailand > Laos > China > South Korea > Japan > Peru Q. Is there a surprise ending? A. Yes, but I’m going to ruin it for you right now: In the last chapter I reveal that I’ve never actually left Ireland, and have been fooling everyone with my photo and video editing skills for years. Suckers! Q. Did Jack Kerouac really say that about your book? A. Um, no. He died thirteen years before I was born. So I kinda lied. Sorry. I hope we can still be friends. Here’s a real testimonial to make amends… “This shit be tight, yo!” – Marco Polo Q. Is there an audio version of the book? A. Yes. You can buy it via my website: http://ndoherty.com/books/cargo/ Q. Are there cargo ship sound effects to go with the audio version of the book? A. I think you can hear a toilet flush at the end of chapter ten. That’s about as good as it gets. Q. Why don't you fly? Sounds dumb. A. It is pretty stupid, and I don't recommend it, but I explain my motivation in the book.

    Entertaining, informative, filled with wit and wonder, this day-by-day sightseeing memoir is an easy and enjoyable read. When Al and Sunny Lockwood registered for a 12-day Mediterranean cruise, they envisioned wandering narrow stone streets in Venice, standing on the Acropolis watching morning sun paint its marble columns gold, listening to the Muslim call to prayer chanted from Turkish minarets. Their travel experience surpassed by far their expectations. Climb aboard Amsterdam canal boats to explore the city from its historic waterways. Gaze across the red roofs of Venice from the city's tallest structure: St. Mark's Bell Tower. Check out the the oldest neighborhood in Athens, and the Grand Bazaar of Istanbul, and stunning Greek islands. Sink your teeth into mouthwatering meals, and hold your breath while riding the rickety cliffside Acropolis lift. Immerse yourself in the book's beautiful photographs. Although not a guide book, readers will find a banquet of digestible details on history and culture within this warm and personal travel tale. Grab your reading glasses and come along for a trip you won't forget.

    Welcome to Colombia, where life is cheap and so are the drugs. In 2006, Matt Thompson travelled to Colombia in search of the life he might have led. Born to American parents, Matt's father was offered a post which would have taken the family to Bogota, but he turned it down because it was too high risk.Instead they came to Australia – low-risk, even paradisaic, and the land that nearly drove Matt to a slow death from boredom. One day he quits his job, picks up his bag and decides to go experience life in the country that's not only the most dangerous in South America, but possibly the world. This is the story of what happened next.

    So begins the journey through France of an optimistic, infinitely curious, 62-year-old woman, who seeks to ransom her self-confidence and learn how to age. Deftly weaving scenic description with sketches of feisty Frenchwomen and flashbacks of older women she has admired, Gail draws wisdom from people and places that have gracefully endured the passing years. By the time she reaches the Mediterranean village that once existed only on her calendar, she feels revitalized. Her refreshed self-concept takes a hit, however, when her beloved proves fickle and a train strike maroons her on the edge of the sea. By the end of her journey, Gail recognizes the joie de vivre beneath the wrinkles of bygone beauty in French women. Now she awakens to her own joy of living and finds that it has no expiration date.

    A must for anyone who's interested in the business of laughter.' JOE LYCETT'The funniest book I've read in years.' ADAM KAYFrom a childhood spent making smoke bombs, killing wasps and carving soap in 70s Kent, Harry Hill then found himself in charge of hundreds of sick people as a junior doctor. Out of his depth and terrified, he chucked it all in to pursue his dream of becoming a stand-up comedian. Battling his way through the 90s Comedy circuit he quickly rose to become a household name and one of the UK's most celebrated comics, almost making it to the top of the showbiz tree . . .From being chased around a car park by an angry heckler, getting fired from Capital Radio and watching every episode of Freaky Eaters, to a bizarre assassination attempt and cutting up Simon Cowell's trousers, Harry takes an honest and hilarious look at the ups and downs of his life and career through the lens of what didn't go right.He shares his secrets on how to be a great comedian, finding joy in failure and creativity in struggle, whilst never forgetting that life is short . . . What readers are saying about Fight! 'Hilarious... recommended unreservedly' *****'Lots of laughs and memories of days gone by' *****'A great book... I could not put it down' *****'Beautifully written and great fun' *****

    Birnbaum sheds light on where and when to catch their hysterical-and historical-antics.-Epcot's newly-expanded International Food and Wine Festival. Cheers!-Typhoon Lagoon's newest water park attraction: Miss Fortune Falls, a water-raft ride is for the whole family! -Disney Cruise Line weighs anchor a mere 50 miles from Walt Disney World, making a surf-and-turf vacation a tempting possibility for many a Disney guest. A special Birnbaum "bonus" chapter guides guests from possibility to reality, laying out all the details for pairing a Disney Cruise with a visit to Walt Disney World.

    Many of these stories never made it back home - until now.

    The dream comes true, but not in the way they had imagined.Yes, the countryside is spacious and peaceful. On summer nights the stars skim the rooftops, the owls hoot and the nightingales sing. Sunflowers smile from their fields. The wine is cheap and the baguettes are crusty. Very crusty indeed. The French neighbours are generous and gentle.But then come the drug addicts, builders who cannot build, demanding compatriots, undercover cops and unwelcome guests. Susie begins to lose hope of attracting the fabled French philanderer and, far from appreciating their new home, all the animals do everything they can to make life as difficult as possible. With her house literally crumbling around her, the number of odd characters she manages to attract are matched by all sorts of creatures appearing from in and out of the woodwork. Terry almost dies, and Susie's resilience and good humour are tested to the limit.Sometimes it feels more like taking part in a musical comedy than starting a new life in France.As the date for Britain leaving the European Union draws close, and British living in European countries still have no idea what the future holds for them after Brexit, Susie looks back on the beginning of her life in the country she loves and has called home for 23 years. Another warm, funny, engaging read from Susie Kelly. This is a first digital, edition of Two Steps Backwards, first published by Bantam/Transworld as a UK paperback. This first worldwide edition is revised and updated and, for the first time, includes photographs.

    Now casting a sideways glance at his own profession, Nick reveals the day-to-day realities of ‘Correspondentland’ — its glamour, its quirks, and its sometimes unsavoury practices. Learn how to evade a shoot-to-kill curfew, the media’s ‘rulebook’ for natural disasters, and when fireproof underwear is an absolute essential.Nick Bryant is currently New York correspondent for the BBC and was formerly the BBC's Washington correspondent. He provides a window onto American politics that no insider can. From how Bush saves seats for his favorite reporters to how Clinton responds to questions about that little blue dress, Bryant discovers the dangers and delights of seeing the world through this unique and often strange perspective.Part memoir, part travelogue, part exposé, this is an unmissable insight into the world of modern reporting, and an intimate portrait of the countries Nick has come to know.

    They left their comfy life behind and moved to Ecuador! Follow along as they battle ‘mañana’ time, stinky buses, and the dreaded ‘Frankenstein’ shower. Will they adjust to South American culture? Will Triplet learn to meow in Spanish? Will the stupid black beans ever cook at that altitude? Thirty Days In Quito: Two Gringos and a Three-Legged Cat Move to Ecuador is a humorous first-hand account of a couple stepping out of their comfort zone, holding on tight, and learning to breathe at 9,000 feet. Also by K. Kris Loomis How to Sneak More Yoga Into Your Life: A Doable Yoga Plan for Busy People How to Sneak More Meditation Into Your Life: A Doable Meditation Plan for Busy People The Monster In the Closet and Other Stories Visit www.kkrisloomis.com and get a FREE short story! You can connect with Kris on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest @kkrisloomis. Thirty Days In Quito: Two Gringos and a Three-Legged Cat Move to Ecuador is a fun read for anyone interested in travel or curious about other cultures, and future expats will get a glimpse of what moving abroad is really like!

    With encouragement from family and friends, never having traveled outside the United States, the self-proclaimed homebody from Texas hopped on a plane at age 53 alone and headed for the Iberian Peninsula. It wasn’t just the beginning of a month-long journey, but also, as he would discover, the beginning of a new life. Facing fear, regret and reality When he arrived in Pamplona, home of the famous San Fermin Running of the Bulls Festival, Clark immediately began to regret his decision. To put it bluntly, he was scared to death. Possessed by an obsessive mind, he could not shake the idea that he was all alone in a foreign country, some 5,000 miles and an ocean’s distance away from home, about to go on a very long walk with nothing but a backpack full of basic supplies. His first impulse was to simply pack up and go back home, but somehow, though full of anxiety, he survived that first sleepless night in a hotel room near the Plaza del Castillo, and began his trek the following day. What did he discover? What happened to John Clark on his 500-mile pilgrimage? Did he make it? Find out when you crack open this colorful, insightful, and revelatory memoir full of tears and triumph. Be inspired as you experience this harrowing and heartwarming coming-of-age story that proves it’s never too late in life for a new adventure.

    Chronicles of a Cruise Ship Crew Member goes below the waterline to explore the cramped, dirty, and dimly lit crew areas on a revealing tour of the ship's underworld. Go where no passenger has gone before and learn what the crew eats, where they sleep, how they party, and finally understand why all of the officers on a cruise ship are Italian.Climb aboard an adventure on the high seas and witness the wonderful side of ship life where crew members have whirlwind escapades while traveling the world aboard a massive sailing city.Drawing from his experiences working as a musician aboard cruise ships for more than five years, Joshua tells the laugh-out-loud funny and also beautifully poignant story of what cruise ship crew members experience from the minute they first step onto a ship to the day they walk down that gangway for the last time.

    Bruce Bryden's tales of 27 years in the service of our most famous park make a gripping and entertaining read, abounding with encounters with elephant, lion, buffalo, leopard and rhino, whether darting for research, managing culling operations by helicopter or stalking on foot. In the best tradition of bushveld stories, there is a great deal of shooting, and a fair amount of running away; there are meetings with extraordinary characters among the rangers; memorable gatherings; hilarious mishaps and narrow escapes; and throughout, a great love and respect for both the wilderness and the creatures that inhabit it.

    When a mysterious phantom enters his life, he sets himself on a quest to discover the true meaning of lummoxness, and what he learns along the way is both shocking and hilarious.Written with honesty and selfeffacing wry humor, Lummox is an exceptional story of manhood at a time of its redefinition, a book that will leave you laughing out loud in recognition and cheering for lummoxes everywhere.