The Food Chain


Geoff Nicholson - 1992
    Virgil Marcel is flying to London as a guest of the ancient and mysterious Everlasting Club. Virgil is the obnoxious, spoiled rotten son of Frank Marcel, founder of the Golden Boy chain, Howard Johnson-like restaurants in California; the only work he's done since college is to revamp his father's one fancy restaurant, now the last word in L.A. chic. In London, a black chauffeur, Butterworth, drives Virgil blindfolded to the club, where his host Kingsley, an upper-class twit, explains the club's tradition of ``indulging in excess.'' Virgil eats and drinks with the same swinish abandon as the other members, all male, but gets into trouble when he French-kisses the naked girl who is the motionless table decoration. So begins this story of gastronomic and erotic debauch; Nicholson cuts between England (where Virgil will be kidnapped by the sexy dinner-table centerpiece, then rescued by the God-fearing Butterworth) and California, where Frank, in the course of investigating his wife's supposed infidelity, discovers his prized chef Leo ejaculating into the sauces. Nicholson sustains a tone of campy menace (by now there's a whiff of cannibalism in the air) as he brings all these characters to London in a plot that zigs and zags entertainingly, though with increasing improbability. Even more troubling, though, are the factual accounts of gastronomic and other excesses interspersed throughout. Aside from the borderline tackiness of linking those notorious modern cannibals, the Andean crash survivors, to the high jinks of the club, these passages suggest authorial obsessions run amok. Spicy fare, though some may find the aftertaste disagreeable.

Facts and Fancies


Armando Iannucci - 1997
    A look at the absurdities of modern life.

The World's Stupidest Signs


Bryony Evens - 2000
    On a cruise ship - Please do not lean on the widow. In a hotel - A sports jacket may be worn to dinner, but not trousers. In a London department store - Bargain basement upstairs.

How to be a Brit: How to be an Alien, How to be Inimitable, How to be Decadent


George Mikes - 1986
    The first of these came out in 1946: the ever famous "How to be an Alien." Later he enlarges the picture with "How to be inimitable" and "How to be Decadent." All three books were illustrated by the master of the cartoonists' art, the late Nicolas Bentley. Here they are, all in one volume, which will make life much easier for today's would-be Brits than it was for those who pervaded them. It is said that a few of the latter actually failed to become indistinguishable from the genuine British article because they found it too tiresome to seek out three separate books: a misfortune that need never again occur to anyone.

Alan Partridge: Every Ruddy Word


Steve Coogan - 2003
    

Thick As Thieves : Hilarious Tales of Ridiculous Robbers, Bungling Burglars and Incompetent Conmen


Andrew Penman - 2013
    Like the bungling burglar who logged on to his own Facebook page at his victim's house - and forgot to turn the computer off when he left, or the stupid bank robber who made his escape in his own car - complete with personalised number plates, or the idiotic criminal who tried to hand himself into the police... in order to collect the reward. Award-winning writer Andrew Penman has scoured the country for this hilarious collection of those who are not just bad, but also dim very dim. 'Andrew Penman enjoys a laugh at the expense of Britain's most stupid burglars' - The Mirror 'Exploits so dim-witted it's surprising they ever managed to keep themselves breathing long enough to commit any crime' - Wales Online Illustrated with cartoons drawn by Neil Kerber.

Stinkfoot


Vivian Stanshall - 2003
    Musical. STINKFOOT is an absurdist musical written by former Bonzo Dog Band frontman Vivian Stanshall (1943-1995) and his wife Ki Longfellow-Stanshall for their Old Profanity Showboat in Bristol. The musical was performed in December 1985 but has not been published before. The Sea Urchin edition will contain the script of the musical, lyrics and artwork by Vivian Stanshall, photos of the Bristol performances and an introduction by Ki Longfellow-Stanshall.

The Adventures of the Crumpsall Kid: A Memoir


Mike Harding - 2015
    After growing up in an Irish Catholic household, he was sent to a grammar school run by priests, from which he eventually emerged unscathed. A combination of O Levels and rock ’n’ roll led him into the bowels of Manchester’s club land, where he worked alongside strippers and Chinese strongman acts while revising the War of Jenkin’s Ear.Testosterone and guilt struggled for mastery in his lapsing Catholic chest and trousers until testosterone won and, with guilt still on his back like Quasimodo’s hump, he toured the dancehalls of Northern England in a VW panel van, taking rock ’n’ roll to one-horse towns where the horse had bolted.Warm, nostalgic and very funny, Mike Harding’s memoir of his early life in post-war Manchester is as idiosyncratic and engaging as the man himself.

Everyday Easy


Lorraine Pascale - 2014
    Enjoy quick but satisfying weeknight dinners such as Creamy Pancetta Pasta with Mushrooms and Parmesan or Chestnut and Pea Risotto with Truffle Oil. Thinking of entertaining? You’ll find dinner-party delights such as Rioja-Braised Lamb Shanks with Chorizo or Twice-Cooked Chicken Kievs.Everyday Easy offers something for every chef and every occasion, whether you’re looking for a tasty meal for two or planning a crowd-pleasing menu for a fun and relaxed evening with friends. Nearly every recipe is accompanied by a gorgeous color photo along with a cornucopia of kitchen tips and tricks to help you whip up great food without the fuss.

Essential Oils: Recipe Quick Reference: Essential Oils Recipes for All Occasions


Philip Ozz - 2015
    These recipes range from those that you yourself can use as well as those that can benefit your beloved pets and home. If you are someone with minimal or no essential oils experience, this book will be good for you. This can help you get started really quick. If you're someone who has a little more experience with essential oils before, this book is also for you. This book offers tons of essential oils recipes resources laid out in a quick, concise, and easy to read format. In this book, you will learn the following awesome information: The basic information about the different essential oils that you can use! Brief information regarding the effectivity of the essential oils! The 100% best way to ensure that you are mixing the right essential oils together to achieve maximum effect! A step-by-step tutorial on how you can mix the essential oils to achieve the right blend or right essential oil product! The definitive guide that contains tons of awesome essential oils recipes! Our professional tips about these essential oil recipes! We’d love to share these to you! Several recipes for essential oil blends and products which are good for you, your kids, your pets, and even your home! and much much more…. So, what are you waiting for? Get started today and experience the various benefits that essential oils can do to you!!! ***SPECIAL OFFER!!!*** LIMITED TIME OFFER 40% OFF (Regular Price $4.99) This #1 Best Selling Critically Acclaimed Book is now available Globally on Amazon - Download it Now!

101 Dumb Emergency Calls


Stuart Gray - 2013
    Mostly from the USA and UK, they bring into sharp focus the extent of the abuse of our critical life-saving services.With cartoons to depict calls and hyperlinks to take the reader to the original audio (some of them released in the public domain by the police and ambulance services in order to show the world how badly a minority of individuals will misuse valuable resources), this book promises to amuse and shock every right-minded person who understands what these services are here for.The author and illustrator are professional front line paramedics, so they know a thing or two about the subject; and from calls to the police for directions to 999 rants about the lack of buses, they have experienced their fair share of such stupidity.You won't believe some of the calls that have been made in the name of personal crisis. You simply won't believe what some people think is an emergency!

Epic Tattoo Fails! The Most Hilarious Misspelled, Badly Drawn & Shockingly Inappropriate Ink


Marcus Rainey - 2013
    Some things last forever...so of all people, you'd think tattoo artists would use spell-check! Get this e-book and laugh your @#$ off at what happens when questionable taste and lack of foresight collide.Note: As the title says, there's some pretty inappropriate stuff in here...not for children!

300 Best Jokes: One-Liners and Funny Short Stories Collection (Donald's Humor Factory Book 1)


Donald Shaw - 2017
    Looking for Something New and Really Funny? Imagine you can get it with JUST ONE CLICK! Yes, this is a JOKE BOOK of your dreams. Vol.1 of the Donald's Humor Factory series. This super funny adult joke book is free of swear words. Donald Shaw is a popular comic and an award-winning humor books author (his wife gave him a French kiss award)! His jokes are loved by thousands of people from Alaska to Zimbabwe, and possibly outside of Earth. Joking is always fun! Jokes bring smiles to people’s faces. Jokes make us laugh. People fall in love when they smile at each other. We love joking in the company of our best friends and families. Jokes help us to relax and overcome any difficulties. Joking is an awesome social skill and a great way to make new friends and to communicate nearly in any surrounding. Many people also love just to read some good jokes for amusement. However, it is not that easy to find real good jokes today. Some of them are simply out-of-date. Some of them are not clean enough. You may also find many joke books that are not really funny and contain too much fluff and advertising. This jokes book is different! Buying this humor book you will get: A great collection of 300 FUNNY JOKES One-liners, real-life awkward situations, and hilarious short stories Great book to read on a long trip Clean and dirty jokes WITHOUT nasty words Jokes for adults and teenagers Jokes about relationship, marriage, bar, professions, hobbies, etc. LIMITED TIME BONUS: the link to download my FREE HUMOR LIBRARY that includes hundreds of great jokes for kids, adults, and teenagers. So the whole family may have fun! This is no-brainer, really! This book is free of racism. I support LGBT community, because love is love. I love all people in the world and I want to make you laugh and smile! This is my ultimate goal and I did not mean to insult anyone. So relax, take it easy and enjoy this humor book! Buy this funny book NOW and roll on the floor laughing! Pick up your copy today by clicking the BUY NOW button at the top of this page!

The Adrian Mole Collection: The Growing Pains of Adrian Mole/True Confessions of Adrian Albert Mole/Adrian Mole: The Wilderness


Sue Townsend - 2000
    I pushed my sausages away untouched. Charting nearly ten years in the life of Adrian Mole, from his increasingly troubled adolescence and schooling to his first job as newt counter for the DoE, from his parents' marital troubles to his own difficult relationship with Pandora, from the failure of his early poems to the even grander failure of his epic novels, these three novels in one volume provide a hilarious portrait of one young man's coming of age. 'He will be remembered some day as one of England's great diarists. No matter what your troubles may be Adrian Mole is sure to make you feel better' Evening Standard

Jackie Tyrrell: The Warrior's Code: My Autobiography


Jackie Tyrrell - 2017
    Kilkenny were beaten in that final by Tipperary but Tyrrell’s inner-most thoughts from his diary, both in the lead-up to, and after the game, provide the narrative to a compelling life story. His unique insights paint the picture of a relentless individual and a relentless team – the most successful side in the history of Irish male sport. The intrigue and aura around Kilkenny coach Brian Cody and his players was always heightened because very little ever emerged from the camp, or the dressing room. Now, for the first time, Tyrrell opens a unique window into the elite mindset and attitude which forged such unprecedented success. Tyrrell’s own journey is chronicled with brutal and unwavering honesty. The hurling legend’s constant drive to be a winner with his beloved county have pushed him towards breaking point many times. Tyrrell operates somewhere between obsessed and maniacal. On the pitch, he displayed the ruthless mentality of an assassin but behind it all, he had to conquer crippling self-doubt and fear. It took until his fourth successive All-Ireland final for Tyrrell to believe he had finally arrived as a senior inter-county hurler, going on to become one of the most feared and respected defenders in the game.