The Cheese Monkeys


Chip Kidd - 2001
    The Cheese Monkeys is a college novel that takes place over a tightly written two semesters. The book is set in the late 1950s at State U, where the young narrator, has decided to major in art, much to his parents’ dismay. It is an autobiographical, coming-of-age novel which tells universally appealing stories of maturity, finding a calling in life, and being inspired by a loving, demanding, and highly eccentric teacher.

The Cat Who Went to Paris & A Cat Abroad: Two Volumes in One


Peter Gethers - 2001
    Then everything changed. Peter opened his heart to the Scottish Fold kitten and their adventures to Paris, Fire Island, and in the subways of Manhattan took on the color of legend and mutual love. The Cat Who Went to Paris proves that sometimes all it takes is paws and personality to change a life.In A Cat Abroad, Peter Gethers recounts the further adventures of Norton, the extraordinary cat with the great Scottish Fold ears, who finds new worlds and people to conquer. Norton, who charmed even the most avowed cat haters with his antics in the best-selling The Cat Who Went to Paris, now hightails it to the south of France - stopping off all over Europe along the way - for a year with his favorite human. As always, Norton astounds those around him with his calm, uncatlike demeanor and succeeds in becoming the object of everyone's affections. In America, Norton goes on the TV talk-show circuit, finds himself on the "A" list of desirable celebrities who stay at the ultra-chic Four Seasons Hotel in Los Angeles, and is the star of a party at Spago, where superstar chef Wolfgang Puck presents him with a Pounce pizza. When Norton and Peter tour the Continent, Norton leaves his mark on Paris, where he encounters five not-so-friendly dogs and a devious chef; Italy, where he almost starts a war over an uneaten sardine; Holland, where he tours the canals; the Swiss Alps, where he has his first raclette dinner; and, of course, Provence, where over the course of a year he hikes in the mountains, makes friends with a goatherder (and his goats), dines in three-star restaurants, and, generally, becomes the most recognizable new inhabitant of the area since Peter Mayle decided to leave London. Along the way, Norton and his human companion face change and learn to understand the problems and the pleasures that come with growing up and growing older together. Like its predecessor, A Cat Abroad is funny, touching, and wise.

F U, Penguin: Telling Cute Animals What's What


Matthew Gasteier - 2009
    There is a cute and present danger lurking out there–in the wild, in the zoos, and sometimes even in our very own homes. Spurred on by the Cute Industrial Complex, these cuddly animals have taken over blockbuster films, inspirational posters, and computer desktops everywhere, further weakening the innocent civilians who are beguiled by these fuzzy frauds. But you are stronger than them, aren’t you? Those soft bellies and wet noses are no match for you–and their free ride has just come to an end. F U, Penguin is the rallying cry for those who choose to fight these power-hungry cute-mongers. Loaded with color photographs and hilarious commentary, this book will have you laughing out loud while it simultaneously saves you from the tragic fate of tossing yarn with big-eyed kittens and bottle-nursing baby pandas forever. ___________________________ "Finally, a book for the rest of us! Most animals go about our business without playing to the audience like the elitists exposed in these chapters.I wasn't sure how many more times I could hear about those great penguins and pandas and kittens before I started eating people... well, more people, anyway."—Jerry the Shark "Penguins killed my parents, and they would not hesitate to kill me. I thank the Crustacean God for Matthew Gasteier, a true saint and a decent human being in a world filled with heartless penguin accomplices."—Dennis the Krill "It's all true. We're the worst."—Anonymous Penguin "The average dolphin is far beyond this level of vulgarity, but I could see how this would be a very enjoyable book for humans. I should remember to hand these out to some of my slower relatives at the common ancestor reunion."—Edward the Dolphin "Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, this style of book is not something we are currently looking for. However, we wish you the best of luck with your human publishers!"—Danielle the Bear, Editor-in-Chief, Random Cave Publishing

Idiot Letters


Paul Rosa - 1995
    National television.

TMI Mom: Oversharing My Life


Heather Davis - 2013
    From scorching her hoo-hah with jalapeños to attempting Carmen Electra’s Aerobic Striptease in torn sweats and tube socks to her frustrated desire to pour tequila on her cereal when her kids say, ‘I’m booooooooored!,’ Heather Davis serves up hilarious tales of family-life insanity that are never mean (except when skewering herself) and never leave the reader screaming, ‘I’m boooooooored!’ TMI Mom FTW!” — Linda Erin Keenan, author of SuburgatoryEver wished you could say what you were really thinking?TMI Mom Heather Davis does just that. With her trademark dry wit and knack for storytelling, TMI Mom goes where no mom has been (at least in the pages of a book), with stories about the crazy things that can happen — in the minivan, the bedroom, and out in the big, bad world

Epic Tattoo Fails! The Most Hilarious Misspelled, Badly Drawn & Shockingly Inappropriate Ink


Marcus Rainey - 2013
    Some things last forever...so of all people, you'd think tattoo artists would use spell-check! Get this e-book and laugh your @#$ off at what happens when questionable taste and lack of foresight collide.Note: As the title says, there's some pretty inappropriate stuff in here...not for children!

The Best of 2.13.61


Henry Rollins - 1998
    Culling over 300 pages of some of today's most thrilling writers, The Best of 2.13.61 Publications hallmarks our company's ten year existence. Excerpts include new material from Henry Rollins and Hubert Selby, Jr, as well as excerpts from Henry Miller's love letters, Nick Zedd's hilarious nihilistic New York urban spelunkings, Ian Shoales' undeniably witty social commentaries and so much more.

SeinLanguage


Jerry Seinfeld - 1993
    For more than 33 million viewers, the Emmy Award-winning television show has become a Thursday night ritual. Even though the show has ended, Jerry Seinfeld's distinct brand of humor can still be yours.In his #1 New York Times bestselling book, SeinLanguage, Jerry Seinfeld has captured on the page his views on topics ranging from Raisinettes to relationships, from childhood to cop shows, and from parents to power suits. This must-have book for all fans--and who isn't a fan?--remains available in both paperback and hardcover.

The Mental Floss History of the United States: The (Almost) Complete and (Entirely) Entertaining Story of America


Erik Sass - 2008
    From the editors of MentalFloss.com and mental_floss magazine—with its tagline: “Feel smart again”—comes an American History text packed with hilarious (but true!) trivia written in the smart-aleck tradition of The Mental Floss History of the World, Mental Floss Presents In the Beginning, and the first mental_floss book, Condensed Knowledge. Perfect for trivia buffs, history lovers, college students, and anyone who likes to laugh and learn. United States history has never been so fun.

Global Village Idiot: Dubya, Dunces, and One Last Word Before You Vote


John O'Farrell - 2001
    “Just when we thought the lawlessness in Iraq was over,” O’Farrell observes, “even more blatant incidents of looting have begun. With handkerchiefs masking their faces, two rioters roughly the height of George Bush and Donald Rumsfeld kicked in the gates of the largest oilfield and grabbed the keys of the gasoline trucks. ‘Yee-haw! It’s all ours! Millions of barrels of the stuff’ they laughed. ‘Yup!’ added the leader ‘ and this mask guarantees my anonymousinity!’ So after all these years there really is such a person as the Thief of Baghdad. Except strangely his accent sounded vaguely Texan.”A writer for the groundbreaking television show Spitting Image and contributor to the screenplay for the hit movie Chicken Run, O’Farrell meticulously researched his conclusions “by spending five minutes on the internet and then giving up.” And while O’Farrell’s sharpest barbs and stingers have often been written to come out of the mouths of grotesque puppets and Claymation chickens, this time around he keeps the best lines for himself: ‘‘With the election of the 43rd President of the United States, the global village is complete,” O’Farrell writes. “’It has its own global village idiot.’”

Love, Alice: My Life as a Honeymooner


Audrey Meadows - 1994
    The book is full of many personal stories never told or published before. 16-page photo insert.

The Big Book of Gross Stuff


Bart King - 2010
    The pages overflow with humor and an array of cool phrases that will have readers bending and sending, blowing soup, and gargling gravy all the way to the bathroom!

It's Hard Out Here For a Shrimp: Life, Love & Living Large


Jim Lewis - 2008
    He's a lothario, a linguist, and a specialist at looking on the bright side of life-- especially when it means twisting or turning a situation so it works in his favor! In this book, he will teach you how to do the same for yourself. He offers a plethora of thorough advice on parties, relationships, careers, love, friendship, and life in general-- there is something in here for everyone! Pepe's thoughts on friendship? "Love comes and goes .but friendship is forever, or at least until they run out of money and places to take you. Building lifelong relationships with people who aren't related to you or attractive to you is a strange habit, but one that's hard to shake. Here's how I deal with it..." Laugh-out-loud funny and in his authentic, Spanish-accented voice, Pepe's musings and guidance will delight readers of all ages with this fantastic comic relief! Served up with hot, fresh, and filled with wit, pith and a dash of salsa this is Pepe's guide to life, love and living large! From family to friendship to romance and everything is between, Pepe's words of wisdom are served up in fun and witty quotes and advice told with his signature brand of humor.

My Custom Van: And 50 Other Mind-Blowing Essays That Will Blow Your Mind All Over Your Face


Michael Ian Black - 2008
    Never before has a single book combined awesome vans, unicorns, Billy Joel, and erotic fiction in such a potent combination. A writing tour de force? Perhaps. A reading experience that will sear itself into your consciousness like a red-hot branding iron? Without question. Comedian and basic cable superstar Michael Ian Black unleashes the full fury of his astonishing intellect in this collection of short comic essays. My Custom Van is a no-holds-barred assault to the funny bone that will literally beat you into submission with hilarity*. How did he do it? How did he create such a fine anthology? Answer: With love. Michael opened his heart and used the magical power of love to write more than fifty thought-provoking essays like, "Why I Used a Day-Glo Magic Marker to Color My Dick Yellow," and "An Open Letter to the Hair Stylist Who Somehow Convinced Me to Get a Perm When I Was in Sixth Grade." Maybe you think love is not a substitute for "good writing skills" and "spell check." Bull pucky! When it comes to writing books, love is the most powerful word processor of all. Sounds pretty great, right? And yet...something is still holding you back from paying the full purchase price of this book. What is it? Perhaps you secretly believe you do not deserve a book this good. Nonsense -- you deserve this book and so much more. In fact, if Michael could have written you all the stars in the sky, that's what he would have done. But he couldn't do that, due to his lack of knowledge in the area of astronomy. So he wrote this book instead. And this flap copy. Enjoy. * Michael Ian Black is not responsible for any actual injuries caused by reading this book.

Comedy Writing for Late-Night TV: How to Write Monologue Jokes, Desk Pieces, Sketches, Parodies, Audience Pieces, Remotes, and Other Short-Form Comedy


Joe Toplyn - 2014
    Now four-time Emmy winner Joe Toplyn reveals his proven methods of writing for late-night television in this one-of-a-kind insider's guide. Toplyn analyzes each type of comedy piece in the late-night TV playbook and takes you step-by-step through the process of writing it. His detailed tips, techniques, and rules include: - 6 characteristics every good monologue joke topic must have - 6 specific ways to generate punch lines - 12 tools for making your jokes their funniest - 7 types of desk pieces and how to create them - 9 steps to writing parodies and other sketches - How to go after a writing job in late night - PLUS a complete sample comedy/talk show submission packet Also use this comprehensive manual to write short-form comedy for the Internet, sketch shows, magazines, reality shows, radio, advertising, and any other medium.