The book chronicles the city's colorful citizens and hopping nightlife, and also explores some of the most hilarious events from its crazy history—like the time the whole town was on fire, its ongoing raccoon infestation, and the cult that took over in the 1970s. Packed with laugh-out-loud-funny photographs, illustrations, and commentary by the other inhabitants of Pawnee, it's a must-read that will make you enjoy every moment of your stay in the Greatest Town in America. Praise for Pawnee: "Carrying this book around is a good way of picking up girls with glasses." —Tom Haverford "I have read over four books, and this is by far the one that has me in it the most." —Andy Dwyer "Literally the greatest endeavor of human creativity in the history of mankind." —Chris Traeger

    In 1789 Ben Franklin wrote, "In this world nothing is certain but death and taxes." Death remains a certainty. But how do we die? It's the enormous variety of how that enlivens final exits.According to death certificates, in 1700 there were less than 100 causes of death. Today there are 3,000. With each advance of technology, people find new ways to become deceased, often causing trends that peak in the first year. People are now killed by everything, from cell phones, washing machines, lawn mowers and toothpicks, to the boundless catalog of man—made medicines. In Final Exits the causes of death—bizarre or common—are alphabetically arranged and include actual accounts of people, both famous and ordinary, who unfortunately died that way. (Ants, bad words, Bingo, bean bag chairs, flying cows, frozen toilets, hiccups, lipstick, moray eels, road kill, starfish, and toupees are only some of the more unusual causes.)

    Schirripa, The Sopranos’ own Bobby Bacala, exposes the inner mysteries of this unique Italian-American hybrid in A Goomba’s Guide to Life so that anyone can walk, talk, and live like a guy “from the neighborhood.”Über-goomba Steve Schirripa shows how being a goomba made him what he is today, offering lessons learned on his own journey from Bensonhurst to Vegas, and to his current gig as Bobby Bacala on one of TV’s most popular shows. Along the way, he shares secrets that will help you get in touch with your own inner goomba. You’ll learn what music to enjoy (Sinatra, yes; Snoop Dogg, no), what movies to watch (Raging Bull, yes; Titanic, never), which sports to follow (baseball is good; golf and tennis, fuhgeddaboudit), and even tips on goomba etiquette. Ever wonder how a real goomba gets the best seat in the house? (Hint: It involves tipping, jewelry, and intimidation.) Schirripa even includes goomba do’s and don’ts (never, ever criticize a goomba’s mother or her gravy; always wear more jewelry than you think you need).With knockout photographs of Schirripa and his compares, and insider information on how to think goomba, speak goomba, cook and eat goomba, and even how to behave at goomba weddings and funerals, A Goomba’s Guide to Life will show any wiseguy wannabe how to sing like a Soprano.

    British actor and comedian Michael Palin -- best known to American audiences for his work in Monty Python and the film A Fish Called Wanda -- follows in the footsteps of Jules Verne's fictional adventurer Phileas Fogg and circles the globe in 80 days.

    Laboriously compiled from three years of blog posts from MattressPolice.com, this collection covers topics as varied as the Incredible Hulk, perpetual motion machines and Satanism, and is sure to keep you running back to the bathroom for more. In fact, we've even included (on page 187*) a laminated card that reads: PLEASE EXCUSE MY FREQUENT TRIPS TO THE BATHROOM AS I HAVE A SEVERE BOWEL AND/OR URINARY TRACT CONDITION. This will allow you to read in peace without having to face embarrassing questions from your family and friends. *If your card is missing, please check all of the other pages. If you still don't find it, address the proprietor of the book shop sternly as follows: "SIR OR MADAM: I AM SHOCKED TO FIND THAT THIS BOOK CONTAINS NO CARD INDICATING THAT I HAVE A SEVERE BOWEL AND/OR URINARY TRACT CONDITION. WHAT, SIR OR MADAM, ARE YOU TRYING TO PULL, EXACTLY?" If you are still unable to get satisfaction, please purchase a copy of the author's critically acclaimed, bestselling novel Mercury Falls. The card is on page 119. WE PROMISE.

    Comedy illustrated.

    This behavior is so ingrained, so subtle, and so often mistaken for true intelligence that identifying it, calling it out, or compiling it into an exhaustive digest has never been attempted. Until now.Complete with illustrated tips, examples, and scenarios, 100 Tricks gives you actionable ways to use words like 'actionable', in order to sound smart. Every type of meeting is covered, from general meetings where you stopped paying attention almost immediately, to one-on-one meetings you zoned out on, to impromptu meetings you were painfully subjected to at the last minute. It’s all here.Open this book to any page and find an easy-to-digest trick with an even easier-to-digest illustration, guiding you on: how to nail the big meeting by pacing and nodding, the most effective ways to listen to your coworkers while still completely ignoring them, and the key to making your presentations 'interactive'.If you hadn’t noticed these behaviors before, you will see them now - from your colleagues, your managers, and soon yourself. Each trick is a mirror to the reality of what happens in meetings, told in the form of hilariously bad advice - advice that you might just want to take. But probably not. But maybe.

    Another super collection of naughty and not-so-naughty jokes, humorous anecdotes, comic interludes, hilarious situations and bitchy remarks, selected by Khushwant Singh from amongst the thousands contributed by his readers and fans - and some manufactured by him.

    Most of all, it’s about the difficulties of staying on the planet when it’s spinning out of control.While taking a humorous look at health, grandparenthood, computers, and social issues, How to Succeed… answers such pressing questions as: What brand of yogurt guarantees you will live to 110? Can older people really shop online, or is the "submit order" button visible only to users under 30? And how many pixels does it take to win your grandchild’s affection?As we get older, we can whine or complain about our losses--memory, muscles, and mobility--or we can roll with the paunches. This book rolls.

    BIZARRE STUFF, AMAZING FACTS, ASTONISHING MYSTERIES, NATURAL WONDERS, LITTLE-KNOWN PEOPLE, USEFUL TIPS AND MUCH, MUCH MOREFrom crime, movies and music to science, history and literature, this book offers an incredible array of intriguing top-10 lists, including:•Urban Legends—Debunked•Influential People Who Never Lived•Ancient Methods of Execution•Poisonous Foods We Love to Eat•Inventions of the Middle Ages•Gruesome Fairytale Origins•Secret Societies•Amazing Film Swordfights•Bizarre Animal Mating Rituals•Misconceptions About Evolution•Tips for Frugal Living•Fascinating Graveyards You Must See

    And he can drive.Adults and children alike would do well to read this book over and over again to learn from Maddox’s sage-like wisdom. Every keystroke Maddox types is brilliant. The world is better off with him in it. Maddox has selflessly shared some of his own art, and we must thank him for it. May his fertility continue to be dangerously potent, so as to impregnate as many babes as possible, and not one fewer.

    He calls for boycotting Canada, says Adolf Hitler would have been a card-carrying member of the ACLU, and thinks Hurricane Katrina victims seen carrying televisions should be shot on sight. Amann and Breuer – the creators of the hugely popular website www.sweetjesusihatebilloreilly.com — take a close look at O'Reilly's own assertions and arguments — taken from his TV and radio shows, books and columns — to expose him for what he is: a self-righteous boob and a sham newsman. The ongoing themes explored in Sweet Jesus, I Hate Bill O'Reilly are that O'Reilly is a bit crazy, not all that sharp and, as the authors put it, about "as self-aware as a legume." The result is a hilariously funny book, a great read for anyone who enjoys seeing a puffed-up blowhard taken down a notch or two — whether they're an O'Reilly hater, fan, or something in between.

    But what if they were real? What would happen if, tomorrow, corpses across the nation began springing up out of their graves and terrorizing the living?Employing hard science and solid police work—not to mention jaw-dropping (literally!) humor—Zombie CSU is the only guide you need to make it through alive—not undead. At last you can:

    The author "discovered" the feline world's best-kept secret in a file hidden on his mother's computer by her cat, Cleo, and now shares it with humanity for the first time. Topics covered range from avoiding visits to the vet, to the artful display of captured prey, to getting in the way of a human trying to read anything, including this paragraph. Upon publication, Cleo denied authorship and hired a team of lawyers, all of whom have their claws out, but despite her best efforts the word is spreading: The Cat Manual is hilarious for cat-lovers of all ages. From the author of Cave Passages and Dark Life.

    Now, an even broader audience can discover Miller's stinging wit in paperback.Dennis Miller respects no boundaries. Whether the subject is dope-addled baseball players who can no longer swing their bats, do-nothing politicians who devote their careers to creating meaningful sound bites, or the nation's resigned acceptance of violence as a way of American life, these thematically arranged monologues are funny and angry. More significantly, they shatter the conventions of comedy by simultaneously making us laugh, think, and seethe. When Miller takes the stage, the audience demands, "the rants, the rants, the rants." Here is the collection of his invigorating and thought-provoking monologues that showcase his singular point of view.