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Things I've Said to My Children


Nathan Ripperger - 2015
    The response from other parents was overwhelming. With Things I've Said to My Children, Ripperger has assembled around 80 of the funniest, weirdest, and most amusing sayings and paired them with full-color, designed images that bring these outrageously hysterical quotes to life. Covering the essential parenting topics like food, animals, don'ts, and of course, bodily functions, Things I've Said to My Children is a light-hearted illustrated reminder of the shared absurdity of parenthood. Especially for those parents who've ever found themselves uttering some variation of the line, "Please don't eat the goldfish crackers you've put in your butt."

Talk to the Hand: The Utter Bloody Rudeness of the World Today, or Six Good Reasons to Stay Home and Bolt the Door


Lynne Truss - 2005
    Taking on the boorish behavior that for some has become a point of pride, Talk to the Hand is a rallying cry for courtesy. Like Eats, Shoots & Leaves, Talk to the Hand is not a stuffy guidebook, and is sure to inspire spirited conversation. For anyone who’s fed up with the brutality inflicted by modern manners (or lack thereof), Talk to the Hand is a colorful call to arms—from the wittiest defender of the civilized world.

Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Plunges into Great Lives


Bathroom Readers' Institute - 2003
    Farnsworth is not a household word despite the fact that he invented something found in most every household: television. Farnsworth is just one of hundreds of subjects in this hefty comic compendium that plumbs the depths in a survey of great lives. Readers also learn about T’sai Lun, the Chinese eunuch who invented paper — and by extension, toilet paper. Other clever unknowns include the inventors of Velcro, Bakelite, and the microwave oven. Of course, not all of the “great lives” here are anonymous. The “Fun with Heretics” section includes Thomas Paine and Rousseau, revealing some unexpected peculiarities. Liberace, Pancho Villa, and Freud happily coexist in this sometimes raunchy romp. Among the topics? “Philosophers Who Got Killed,” “Child Geniuses” (and its evil twin, “High School Dropouts”), and much more.

Applicant


Jesse Reklaw - 2006
    The author found discarded, confidential, PhD applicant files for the biology department at an Ivy League university from 1965 to 1975 as he was rooting through the recycling bin for magazines. Photographs of the prospective students were stapled to many of the documents and this book collects these photos and pairs them with accompanying comments from employers and professors. The results are absurdist, confusing, often hilarious, and disturbing. They provide unique insight into outdated, 1970s social attitudes and ephemera yet much of the book’s appeal is found in what the book fails to say: the blank and despondent stares of its subjects, the outdated fashions and hairstyles, and its understated text.

Life Moves Pretty Fast: The Lessons We Learned From Eighties Movies (And Why We Don't Learn Them From Movies Any More)


Hadley Freeman - 2015
    Comedy in Three Men and a Baby, Hannah and Her Sisters, Ghostbusters, and Back to the Future; all a teenager needs to know in Pretty in Pink, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Say Anything, The Breakfast Club, and Mystic Pizza; the ultimate in action from Top Gun, Die Hard, Beverly Hills Cop, and Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom; love and sex in 9 1/2 Weeks, Splash, About Last Night, The Big Chill, and Bull Durham; and family fun in The Little Mermaid, ET, Big, Parenthood, and Lean On Me.In Life Moves Pretty Fast, Hadley puts her obsessive movie geekery to good use, detailing the decade’s key players, genres, and tropes. She looks back on a cinematic world in which bankers are invariably evil, where children are always wiser than adults, where science is embraced with an intense enthusiasm, and the future viewed with giddy excitement. And, she considers how the changes between movies then and movies today say so much about society’s changing expectations of women, young people, and art—and explains why Pretty in Pink should be put on school syllabuses immediately.From how John Hughes discovered Molly Ringwald, to how the friendship between Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi influenced the evolution of comedy, and how Eddie Murphy made America believe that race can be transcended, this is a “highly personal, witty love letter to eighties movies, but also an intellectually vigorous, well-researched take on the changing times of the film industry” (The Guardian).

The Liberal Redneck Manifesto: Draggin' Dixie Outta the Dark


Trae Crowder - 2016
    Home to some of the best music, athletes, soldiers, whiskey, waffles, and weather the country has to offer, the South has also been bathing in backward bathroom bills and other bigoted legislation that Trae Crowder has targeted in his Liberal Redneck videos, which have gone viral with over 50 million views. Perfect for fans of Stuff White People Like and I Am America (And So Can You), The Liberal Redneck Manifesto skewers political and religious hypocrisies in witty stories and hilarious graphics—such as the Ten Commandments of the New South—and much more! While celebrating the South as one of the richest sources of American culture, this entertaining book issues a wake-up call and a reminder that the South’s problems and dreams aren’t that far off from the rest of America’s.

Ultimate: The Greatest Sport Ever Invented by Man


Pasquale Anthony Leonardo - 2007
    Most people think it’s Frisbee football played barefoot and without boundaries. Those people are wrong. Ultimate is a sport played by 824,000 people a year in North America—more than korfball, lawn darts, lacrosse, and curling combined. Ultimate is so popular that it even has rules that are sometimes followed.This book will provide you with complete and total knowledge of the Ultimate game.THIS BOOK INCLUDES:-- The Eight Ultimate Player Types-- The 42 Most Common Nicknames-- 28 Near-Useless Throws on the Field-- How to Name Your Ultimate Team-- Where to Play Ultimate Without Being Mocked-- How to Score at an Ultimate Party-- Useful Playing Tips from Experts of the Game PLUS: HOW TO PLAY ULTIMATE IN EIGHT EASY STEPS – AN ILLUSTRATED GUIDE -- Can I play Ultimate with a mustache?-- Where do Ultimate babies come from?-- How can I become an Ultimate champion without practicing?-- What is “throwing Fire”?-- How can I survive a shark attack?  About the author:Pasquale Anthony Leonardo IV has covered numerous championship Ultimate tournaments since 1997 and was the Media Director for the 2006 World Junior Ultimate Championships. In 2005 he co-wrote Ultimate: The First Four Decades, which was reviewed in Sports Illustrated and featured on ESPN’s live talk show "Cold Pizza." He also writes screenplays. He lives in Brooklyn, New York and/or somewhere out West.

Me Moir - Volume One


Vic Reeves - 2006
    Growing up in Yorkshire and then CountyDurham, the boy who would be Reeves somehow managed to escape the attentions of 'Randy Mandy' and get a crash course in pig castration, before having encounters with Jimi Hendrix and the Yorkshire Ripper.Peopled with weird and wonderful characters, Vic Reeves' memoir is authentic, witty and inventive, and as unique as you'd expect from one of Britain's most exceptional comedy talents.

The ‘If You Prefer a Milder Comedian, Please Ask for One’ EP


Stewart Lee - 2012
    On a long walk across London, he endures a coffee shop humiliation involving a loyalty card which suggests itself as a framing device. Later that month, thanks to Jeremy Clarkson's casual slur against Gordon Brown and the appearance of a well-meaning young comedian in an advert, a show is born. Featuring a transcript of the show fully annotated with footnotes, the If You Prefer A Milder Comedian EP confirms Stewart Lee as the most original, daring and brilliant comedian of his generation.

It's Not Easy Being Green: And Other Things to Consider


Jim Henson - 2005
     "When I was young, it was my ambition to be one of the people who made a difference in this world. My hope is to leave the world a little better for my having been there. It's a wonderful life and I love it." Jim Henson "Yeah, well, I've got a dream too. But it's about singing and dancing and making people happy. That's the kind of dream that gets better the more people you share it with. And, well, I've found a whole bunch of friends who have the same dream. And, it kind of makes us like a family." Kermit the Frog, The Muppet Movie

Crazy Plant Lady


Isabel Serna - 2019
    You know you’re a crazy plant lady when watering is a hobby, you can’t resist a cute pot, and just looking at succulents and monsteras makes you smile. This charming celebration of the plant lady lifestyle proves that plant love is the joy that keeps growing. There are sweet puns: Aloe you vera much. Plant lady dreams: thrifting the perfect vintage mister. Relatable mantras: Every day is a good day to go plant shopping. All featuring vibrant art by Isabel Serna throughout—plus, a bonus sheet of plant-themed stickers!

Defunctland Guide to the Magic Kingdom


Kevin Perjurer - 2018
    

Going for the Bronze: Still Bitter, More Baggage


Sloane Tanen - 2005
    Whether playing the online dating game, trying couples therapy, dealing with uncooperative children, discovering the melancholy of middle age, dreaming of a better life, or finally grasping the golden (or at least bronze) ring, these chickens encounter everyday troubles and triumphs as painfully recognizable as they are hilarious. Clever, charming, and endlessly entertaining, Going for the Bronze is a brilliant follow-up to a wholly unique bestseller.

In Search of Nice Americans


Geoff Steward - 2017
    From New York to Alaska, he tries to fend for himself without his trusty PA and life support, the unflappable Charmaine, for whom contentment lies in Jesus Christ and custard creams.With his blend of waspish wit and mischievous charm, Steward seeks out normal Americans, such as Joe le Taxi, the former NYPD officer who was one of the first on the scene at the Twin Towers and now runs an extortionate executive taxi service; Pam and Bob, a paranoid psychiatrist and a failed actor who once saw the back of Meryl Streep s head; Taylor the Alaskan bushwhacker who was raised by wolves and revels in their scat; Jeb the Yosemite inn-sitter who lives his life at the pace of a Ford Model T; Kacey Musgraves, the controversial country music star staying at the farm in Tennessee; and Sheriff Duke of Calhoun County, South Carolina, who reintroduces Steward to the long (and armed) arm of the law.For anyone at a crossroads, contemplating a temporary or permanent career break, this affectionate travel romp is essential reading. Journeying coast-to-coast across the US with Steward might just remind you that, despite the post-Trump hysteria, there are many normal and decent Americans out there

Did You Read That Review?: A Compilation of Amazon's Funniest Reviews


Amazon Reviewers - 2014
    Witty and unexpected, this collection of customer reviews is sure to show you a new, hilarious, and completely candid side of Amazon products and reviews you never knew existed.