James (AKA manners columnist Miss Prim & Proper) heads to Sinful, Louisiana to stay with her frail, elderly great-aunt Ida Belle, a woman she's never met. What better place to hide than a sleepy little southern bayou town where nothing ever happens? But when the bullets start to fly, she soon discovers that her aunt Ida Belle and friends are anything but feeble, and that Sinful is anything but quiet. When the corpse of a scorned suitor goes missing, Stephanie decides her best hope to escape a murder rap is to join forces with Swamp Team Three.

    One of her debts is with the owner of a landscaping company. Could she pay him back in services? He seems nice enough...Excerpt:As soon as Jeff walked into his office, he knew something was amiss because it was Monday morning and Todd and Alan were all smiles. When he stepped in, Mitch seemed to come out of nowhere, slapping him on the back and telling him what a glorious Monday morning it was.In his seven years working with Todd and Alan, Jeff had never seen them smile; he didn’t even know they could smile. And as for Mitch ... he must have smelled too many of those weeds they were taking out of their clients’ yards.Completely dumbfounded, he turned the corner into his office and immediately realized it wasn't weeds or weed. The reason behind the smiles on and the cheery disposition of these clowns on this glorious Monday morning took another shape altogether.Stumbling into his office after being caught off guard and slapped on the back, he was immediately greeted by the most gorgeous, ass-thetically pleasing tush in tight jeans he had seen in a long, long time.He wondered what the face looked like and quickly decided it didn't really matter as he focused on her assets while she was bent down shuffling through some papers and totally unaware of the eight eyes boring through her. Four pair of eyes who should have been working on something, but couldn't disengage.The fact that she was rummaging through his papers didn’t immediately register.The woman turned around without looking up and carried a stack of papers to a file cabinet that had come with the building and had never been used. As far as he could recall, the cabinet had never been opened, and so far, had been used as a shelf for a silk plant his mother gave him as a gift when he started the business.To his dismay, the plant was now in the trash bin next to the file cabinet. That hurt.The woman was oblivious to the attention she was getting and after depositing the stack of papers in a neat pile in the top drawer of the file cabinet, she turned around to see a gaping Jeff standing before her.The first thing Jeff thought before hinging his jaw back into place was that the woman's front-side was just as pretty as her backside. She looked to be in her early thirties, and not only wore the jeans very well, but the white t-shirt she had on was filled out in all the right places and looked like an advertisement for trouble.She was petite, but disproportionately bigger where it really mattered. Her hair was tied with one of those elastic fabric bands his nieces always wore, and her eyes were as green as the silk plant had once been.Jeff gave himself a few seconds before giving in to reason. Regretfully, he decided it was time to put an end to his enjoyment - nice tush or not. After all, this was his office, he was the boss, and he had no idea what the hell was going on.“What did you do to my plant?!” was somehow the first thing that came out of his mouth. As if realizing how stupid his remark was, Jeff rather forcefully shoved his amused employees out of the way and out of his office.She looked down at the trash bin he was pointing to, and she suddenly seemed very confused when she looked up to see his expectant and slightly flushed face.“It’s dead. I don't think it can be saved, so I threw it out." Bending down to get it, she added, "I can put it back up he ..."Now that really hurt. Not to mention the fact that her bending down again completely disarmed him.“How can silk be dead?” he snapped.“That was silk?" she replied smiling. "Wow, I never met anyone who could kill silk before.”Jeff tried to ignore the chuckles coming from the room next door, but just as he was about to snap at them, the intruder...

    What she, Hanna Frankenstein, needs is a good, strong pair of hands about the place. To the villagers' mounting alarm, she has not far to look...---------------------------------------------------------------When Aunt Frankenstein arrives at the castle of her nephew, who created the monster, to restore that place to order and clear the family's blackened name, she encounters both Dracula and the werewolf and attempts to solve their problems, too.First published in Sweden by Bonniers Grafiska Industries AB, Stockholm, under the title Frankensteins Faster.

    Jokes, humor, and comedy come in many forms. Whether it is a few funny jokes, a silly joke book, or a funny movie, we can all benefit from the positive effects of comedy and humor! You'll love this hilarious joke book. Share a funny joke with a friend today! Amazon Prime Members can borrow this book for FREE! 151+ funny yo momma jokes Hilarious yo momma insults and humor Hours of funny jokes and entertainment With this MASSIVE collection of funny yo momma jokes you can make everyone laugh! This ebook full of funny yo momma jokes is perfect for any occasion. You and your friends will laugh for hours at this funny joke book. Uses for funny jokes... Can aid in story-telling Great for conversation starters Improves conversation and social skills Can make others laugh, smile, and be more playful Can lighten tense moods and create rapport with others Are you looking for funny and hilarious yo momma jokes? Yo momma is so fat… she walked in front of the TV and I missed 3 shows! LOL Yo momma is so old… she knew Burger King while he was still a prince! HAHA Yo momma is so short… she can use a sock for a sleeping bag! Funny Yo Momma Jokes! Yo momma is so tall… she tripped over a rock and hit her head on the moon! HAHA Yo momma is so poor… she can't afford to pay attention! LOL Yo momma is so stupid… she sold her car for gas money. Funny Yo Momma Jokes! Yo momma is so ugly… that she scares blind people! HAHA Yo momma is so hairy… you almost died of rug burn at birth! LOL Yo momma is so bald… you can see what’s on her mind. This Hilarious Joke Book has 151+ Funny Jokes About... Yo momma is so fat… Yo momma is so skinny… Yo momma is so old… Yo momma is so short… Yo Momma is so tall… Yo momma is so poor… Yo momma is so stupid… Yo momma is so ugly… Yo momma is so hairy… Yo momma is so bald… Yo momma is so lazy… Other yo momma jokes… LOL Funny Jokes Club The LOL Funny Jokes Club is dedicated to comedy. We'll tickle your funny bone with our side-splitting jokes and humor.

    After abandoning his new home as a lost cause, he's caught up in the poker craze and moves to Atlantic City with a new dream of "playing poker for a living", but soon finds himself stuck in a dizzying spell of bad luck at the card tables. Or maybe he just sucks at poker, like everybody else. His money all gone, and finding that it's actually difficult to drink oneself to death at 1am, he's suddenly offered a chance to make his money back, and then some, by running an underground poker game in New York City. Once in New York, Tim finds himself on the road to recovery and making real money for the first time—but at what cost? We Run Bad offers an authentic and darkly comic look at underground poker culture, while serving up an indictment of post-recession America. Here, every game is rigged, and the only way to come out ahead is to be the one doing the rigging.

    Or, if you’re James Stark, you spend eleven years in Hell as a hitman before finally escaping, only to land back in the hell-on-earth that is Los Angeles.Now Stark’s back, and ready for revenge. And absolution, and maybe even love. But when his first stop saddles him with an abusive talking head, Stark discovers that the road to absolution and revenge is much longer than you’d expect, and both Heaven and Hell have their own ideas for his future.Resurrection sucks. Saving the world is worse.Darkly twisted, irreverent, and completely hilarious, the Sandman Slim series is the must-read.Includes: Sandman Slim, Kill the Dead, Aloha From Hell and Devil Said Bang.

    A compulsive widowed blacksmith with two young daughters. Will they find a way to coexist or even better, forge a romantic relationship? Ada Pike longs to leave the life of a socialite and use her skills as a baker to love and nurture a family. A move to the country will perfectly suit her first steps into life on her own. Barrett Montgomery rejects the idea of a mail-order bride. What he needs is a housekeeper—someone he can fire if things don’t work out the way he likes. Can a matchmaking agency work miracles to bring two people with opposing goals together?

    Culling over 300 pages of some of today's most thrilling writers, The Best of 2.13.61 Publications hallmarks our company's ten year existence. Excerpts include new material from Henry Rollins and Hubert Selby, Jr, as well as excerpts from Henry Miller's love letters, Nick Zedd's hilarious nihilistic New York urban spelunkings, Ian Shoales' undeniably witty social commentaries and so much more.

    Have a new monster as a pet? Worried about how to groom him, what (or whom) to feed him, how to keep him healthy, happy, and howling? Here's all you need to know -- including how to catch your very own Frankenstein, Vampire, Mummy, Werewolf.

    The competition is furious; there's sabotage and treachery and the heartbreak of root rot, and many a weigh-off ends in tears. This year, more than just the grand prize is at stake. The Holy Grail is within reach: the world's first fifteenhundred-pound pumpkin. And Ron and Dick Wallace think they have what it takes to get it.Backyard Giants follows a tumultuous season in the life of a close-knit tribe of competitors as they chase down the ultimate pumpkin prize. In the grueling and gut-wrenching quest for truly colossal fruit,

    It’s an equinox place, my mother once said, where dark and light things are equally in power.I want to tell you, dear strangers, why I was there and what I found.The three-winged pigeon. My cynical doppelgänger. The loneliness and marvels and confusions of the house. And most of all the ghost living in my bedroom.We learned how to talk without using sound. She was secretive and scared and difficult to know. But she was also warm and playful, as willing to share the room in silence as to trace vulgar symbols on my hand to get a rise.She helped me with the hundred-pound centipede, the hostile little man living in my basement, and the emptiness I’d felt since my mother lost her mind.I tried to help her out of limbo with experiments and spells until I realized if they worked—if we succeeded—I would lose her."

     But Samantha will never forget the day that she made a pact with her three best friends in high school. Each of them took a pledge to never date their idea of Mr. Wrong. Fun and innocent, right? The problem with Samantha’s Mr. Wrong is that he’s one of her best friend's brothers. Samantha slept with him in high school. He was her first and no man has ever compared. Fast forward to today when her best friends all agree to accept a challenge to go date their Mr. Wrongs by the age of thirty. Remember that man who could change everything? It’s him...her Mr. Wrong. And he's just made her an offer she can't refuse, even if it means leaving the ones she loves behind.

    The forest is packed to capacity with dangerous and terrifying creatures of all shapes, sizes, and hunger levels, and you'll get to observe these wonders in complete safety. Howl with a werewolf! Gaze into the glowing eyes of a giant spider! Look right through a spooky ghost! See horrific monsters you couldn't even imagine, only inches away from you! Things with fangs, things with claws, things with dripping red jaws -- you'll see them all! Not thrilling enough? Well, it's Halloween, and so we're offering a very special tour through the Haunted Forest. The new route goes deeper into the woods than any civilians have ventured before, and you're guaranteed to get a good scare! Rest assured that every possible security precaution has been taken. The Haunted Forest Tour has a 100% safety record, and technical difficulties are unheard of. You will be in no danger whatsoever. We promise. Bram Stoker Award-nominated authors James A. Moore and Jeff Strand have teamed up to take you on an action-packed, monster-laden adventure that will make you laugh, scream, and think twice before going near ghastly oversized beasts that want to devour you. "[An] absolute gem of a read...What comes next is over two hundred pages of non stop, in your face, gore drenched action...You will be exhausted by the time you reach the satisfying last page...Think Jurassic Park with bloodthirsty demons on an adrenaline rush and you have The Haunted Forest Tour." - GoreZone magazine "James A. Moore and Jeff Strand are a literary dream team. Devout readers of the genre are in for a real treat as these two horror heavyweights combine forces and battle their characters to the bloody death...Remember how it felt to inventory and consume your candy on Halloween night? That's the atmosphere in the forest. You feel like a glutton, like you couldn't possibly stomach one more gooey demise, but you turn the page and unwrap another nightmare anyway." - Horror-Web "Moore and Strand heap scares upon plot twists in one of the freshest and most entertaining novels in recent years. The authors offer a frightening and high-octane tale, presented as an apocalyptic disaster movie." - Horror World

    Young Vincent Malloy's vivid imagination takes him on a macabre journey into a fantastical and weird world in which his home is filled with spiders and bats, his aunt becomes an exhibit in his wax museum, and his beautiful wife is buried in his mother's flower bed.

     Meet Wally Moscowitz. His day job is top secret. As ghostwriter for Oral B, the most famous gangsta rapper in the world, Wally is the real mastermind behind Godz-Illa Records' best-selling artist, and the best-kept secret in the Industry. But if word gets out about Wally's true profession, Godz-Illa's kajillion-dollar rap empire will be sunk, and Wally will be dead meat. When Wally comes home one particularly bizarre afternoon to find a ransom note and his best friend and dog, Dr. Barry Schwartzman, missing, Wally goes to great lengths to stop the dognappers while keeping the big secret under wraps. He must, if he wants to walk away with his job, not to mention his life, intact. The hunt for Dr. Schwartzman and the blackmailing thug who is trying to reveal hip-hop's biggest conspiracy becomes a wild-goose chase in which everyone becomes a suspect: Sue Schadenfreude, Wally's girlfriend, who makes a pretty penny massaging Barbra Streisand's papillon, Yenta; Pardeep Vishvatma, Wally's neighbor, who keeps a watchful eye on all the suspicious characters lurking about the hood; Jerry Silver, Wally's slick-rick, self-styled superagent; Abraham "Dandy" Lyons, Wally's boss and Godz-Illa's CEO-badass with Suge Knight's street cred and Tony Soprano's "friends"; Jem, the fiery, achingly familiar vixen who steals Wally's heart; Yo Yo Pa and Teddy Bizzle, Oral B's entourage; and the mysterious mob crew: Five-two Lou, Six-seven Kevin, and Balsamic Vinny, who show up when Wally needs them most. Duck Duck Wally is a hilarious romp through the absurdities of Los Angeles, the bombastic details of hip-hop culture, and a day in the life of what was supposed to be the painfully ordinary existence of Wally Moscowitz.