Note: These texting fails contain profanity, not for children.When are people going to learn that autocorrect can't be trusted? With FAILS like these, we actually hope that's not for a long time.This book complies 101 of the funniest, most viral and cringeworthy autocorrect screenshots to date.Guaranteed to put you on the floor laughing!

    We promise to make you laugh and give you that much needed break in the middle of all the crazy.We have partnered with the most talented bunch of moms and dads to bring you the best, the funniest, and the most outrageous stories to get you from girth to birth.Are you having strange cravings? Have you asked yourself what in the hell is happening to my body? Have strangers touched your belly? If you've answered yes to any of these questions then this is the book for you! Prop up your cankles, grab a bowl of your favorite ice cream covered in olives and have a laugh with our crew. Things are about to get real.

    This crafty revision of English vocabulary posits that Platypus should signify “to give your cat pigtails;” that Flemish should mean “rather like snot;” and that Celtic is in fact a prison for fleas. With nearly 600 new definitions, this side-splitting resource pushes the boundaries of the English language to riotous new limits.

    Two registered sex offenders had come to live in the small town Greenberg had called home for thirty years, and his fellow citizens, terrified and enraged, had come out to pin the blame on him. In this riveting memoir about a modern-day witch hunt, Greenberg recounts with his trademark acerbic humor what it is like to be the target of an entire town's wrath. As he describes his Hawthornian moment, he vividly sketches the characters and landscapes that make up a classic New England village and reflects on sex, panic, betrayal, and the sometimes beautiful, sometimes terrible ties that bind communities together.Gary Greenberg is the author of four books, most recently The Book of Woe: The DSM and the Unmaking of Psychiatry, which will be out in paperback this fall. His features and essays have appeared in many publications, including The New York Times, The New Yorker, Rolling Stone, and Harper's, where he is a contributing editor. He is the recipient of the Erik Erikson Institute Prize for Excellence in Mental Health Media. A practicing psychotherapist, he lives with his family in Connecticut.Cover design by Kristen Radtke.

    No one is actually compatible with anyone else/ we just all get swept away by lust or, deafened by the thrashmetal tick of the biological clock, shut down all critical facilities. Part 1 of Darkside Zodiac in Love is "I'm Your Venus," which is all about the planet of L.O.V.E. and Libra and Taurusthe signs it rules directlyand the havoc they can play in our lives. Part 2 shows how love hurts all the way around the zodiac. It identifies the cheaters, describes how members of each sign conduct themselves on dates and perform in bed, and provides compatibility charts and blinddate guides. Darkside Zodiac in Love will help readers take a cold, hard look at all the shabby tricks, manipulations, lies, and cruel intentions each sun sign tries to hide. It won't mend a broken heart, but it will tell readers who they are compatible with and who is likely to murder them in their sleep! It also tells readers what conniving, twotiming, icyhearted little love rats they really are, but then nothing comes for free, does it?! * Snarky, snarkywe all take love too seriously and astrology not seriously enough.

    Thanks to it, you will be able to UNLEASH the full power of your Amazon Echo, Echo Dot and Amazon Tap. AND you will find my email address at the end of the book, so feel free to ask me any questions you might have about Alexa. What is Amazon Echo Dot and Alexa Let me help you figure out what this this exciting technology is all about, so you can enjoy it too! Amazon Echo is a speaker connected to the internet that you can control with your voice. Alexa is the built-in vocal assistant of Amazon Echo. Alexa lets you play music, control your lights, ask for the weather and more. What you will learn: Step-by-step instructions on how to set up your device Get to know about all the things that Amazon Echo can do Get customized News, Traffic and Weather updates Connect your Google Calendar to your device Everything you need to know about Alexa in a single HIGH-QUALITY book Stream music from your favorite audio sources: iPhone, Android, Spotify, Amazon Music, Pandora, iHeartRadio, TuneIn Get ACTIONABLE ADVICE on how to build your smart home Control your lights, TV and room temperature with your voice Explore the complete list of Alexa-enabled devices organized per category Have fun by playing with 500 Easter Eggs Learn How IFTTT and Yonomi help you to better control your home Get to know the 20 most useful Alexa Skills Learn how Amazon Echo was created Written By An Alexa Lover For (future) Alexa Lovers How to troubleshoot your Echo Learn how Alexa works behind the scenes Explore the future of Alexa And much, much more! This is the only Amazon Echo book you will ever need Get your copy today! This book will save you hours figuring out how Echo works. I am sharing all my hacks so you can go from Beginner to Expert in an hour. I wish that upon reading this book, you will realise this exciting times that we live in. That you will see all the possibilities that the Amazon Echo has to offer. The time for innovation is now, and it is up to you to enjoy it now. Through the book, you will come to see Echo for what it is and what it can be. I am exploring in depth numerous topics such as Playing Music, Building your Smart Home, Using Alexa Skills and more. This book will help save you many hours trying to figure out what the Echo can do. Bonus Sign up to my free weekly newsletter to get the best new Alexa Skills in your inbox. Table of Contents 1. Preface 2. The Genesis of Amazon Echo 3. How Does Alexa Work? 4.

    From patents that should still be pending to hairdos that attract vermin, these horrors will leave you thankful you didn't have to struggle to live through them. Brace yourself as the truth hits you like an ice-cold Victorian-era shower with enough pressure to knock you unconscious. Get ready to shudder with laughter (or horror) at these funny moments in history that are not to be forgotten.

    In this quirky new title designer and typographer Teresa Monachino rounds up and breaks down a variety of unruly words: words lacking in integrity, misleading words that do not mean what they say, words that mean more than they say, words with inconsistent pronunciation or spellings that are just plain cruel! Using striking and witty graphic design the author demands answers to such troublesome questions as, why is abbreviation such a long word, does monosyllabic really need five syllables and why is lisp so hard to say if you have one?

    

    Write books FASTER. Write BETTER books. Write MORE books. #1 Kindle Bestseller in Authorship, Writing Skills, and Business Writing - Jan. 2015! The Kindle self-publishing revolution is here! Are you in? Why spin your wheels struggling to write bulky, bloated books the traditional publishing way when you can turbo-charge your Kindle author platform with greater freedom, flexibility, and chances for success? This game-changing guide is for aspiring authors AND established publishing pros alike who want to shake-up their routine and embrace a powerful new approach to self-publishing non-fiction. Are you ready to Write Short Kindle Books? You'll learn: Why writing shorter Kindle books is the best approach for many non-fiction authors The benefits of boosting your volume with many shorter, high-quality books How to price your short ebooks for maximum success Ideal word counts for Kindle books How to break larger book ideas down into numerous smaller books How to brainstorm, outline, and write books faster and more efficiently How to save money on covers, editing, and Kindle book formatting Why building a team of Beta Readers is crucial How to bring your book from final draft to launch And much more! Click on "Look Inside" to Learn More!

    With this book you will learn how to tap into every Kindle Fire feature, including many of the hidden ones not discussed in other books. From setting up your Kindle Page, managing your music, watching movies, and downloading content - this book covers everything. The task based full-color format allows you to quickly and easily find the exact task you want to accomplish and walks you through it in a delightfully concise and visual manner. My Kindle Fire makes it easy for you to:• Master all the basics, fast: reading, playing, watching, browsing, and more• Tweak your Kindle Fire for quicker access and longer battery life• Sample best-seller book chapters for free• Mark up any eBook with highlights, notes, and bookmarks• Convert your personal documents for use on Kindle Fire• Discover Calibre, a powerful eBook management tool• Control even the largest music libraries• Get instant answers from Wikipedia, and from Kindle Fire’s built-in dictionary• Listen to personalized Internet radio stations created just for you• Use your Kindle Fire as a digital photo frame• Prevent unwanted subscription charges• Set up any email account to work on your Kindle Fire• Explore any web content with Amazon’s innovative Silk browser• Use Amazon Cloud to get your stuff anywhere—even if you left your Kindle at home• And much much more…Unlike many other guides which might only briefly mention or skip over some very import Kindle Fire features My Kindle Fire covers everything. Here are just a few of the things you'll find in My Kindle Fire that aren't covered in other guides: • Full coverage of Calibre, a free application for Mac or PC that helps manage your eBook library• A large number of walkthroughs for managing music playlists, including how to use cloud playlists. • How to reinstall multiple apps at once in case you reset your Kindle Fire. • Step-by-step walkthroughs on configuring all types of email accounts. • Coverage on handling attachments in your email application. • Importing contacts from your existing email application or cloud service and how you can export your contacts in order to back them up. • How to use Copy and Paste on the Kindle Fire. • How to use social networking integration with Facebook and others. • Walkthroughs on using the Gallery app, Pandora, Audible, and other popular apps. • Shows you how to access files on other computers in your house right from your Kindle Fire.

     Includes Overdue Account, Walter's Cargo Shorts, Simon's Piecharts, Missing Missy, Obviously a Foggot, Formal Complaints, Justin’s Floodlight, Matthew’s Party, Permission Slip and many more.

    We all know one! They like to groan and grumble, offering their own commentary on the shortcomings of modern life. Whether it is queues at the supermarket, the state of the health system, the price of a pint these days, the hairstyles of teenagers, or the number of Maltesers you actually get in a bag, there is always something that will get their goat. 'The Grumpy Old Git's Guide to Life' is a hilarious celebration of all these grumps, how to identify one, what exactly they find so irritating and why we find their rants quite so amusing.

    A look at over 400 of the best historical movies (and some of the worst) purporting to be ‘factual’ or ‘based on actual events’; and how Hollywood has distorted, altered, manipulated, exaggerated, even falsified history under the all-encompassing premise…based on a true story…

    That's what happens to many bloggers. They work hard and create great content, but there's no way their blog will succeed. Why? Because they failed to research their blog topic ahead of time. In "How to Find a Profitable Blog Topic Idea" you'll learn a proven formula for locating a winning idea that merges YOUR personal passion with something that will actually make money. Start Your Blogging Journey... Finding a great niche is one of the first steps you'll take as a blogger. That's why it's important to get it right. Everything you do online depends on locating a topic that actually has profit potential. Fortunately, it's not hard to research a blog niche. Really, it's a simple process that anyone can do - even if you don't have computer experience. Follow the Six-Step Plan for Starting a Blog "How to Find a Profitable Blog Topic Idea" provides a step-by-step strategy that can be applied TODAY. Here's what's covered: Learn the 3 B's of Demonstrating Authority Complete the Four-Step Plan for Identifying Your Passion Use Four Tools to Find a "Hook" for Your Blog Follow the Seven-Step Plan to Determine the Profit Potential of ANY Market Ask Five Simple Questions to Finalize Your Blog Decision Learn How to Make LOTS of Mistakes and Still Succeed as a Blogger It's not hard to find a great blog idea. Just follow this blueprint and you can do it today. Would You Like To Know More? Download now and locate that perfect blog idea.