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The Bad Mother's Wedding
Suzy K. Quinn - 2020
Dreams of rose-covered cottages, rolling pins and two parents living with their own biological child were well and truly shattered.But now Juliette is engaged to her childhood sweetheart, Alex Dalton, and everything is looking up. Juliette can’t wait to marry Alex and live happily ever after at the Dalton Estate.The trouble is, Juliette isn’t the only one getting married this year. Her ex-partner, Nick, is getting married too and is trying his hardest to sabotage Juliette’s wedding day. Plus, there’s the small matter of the global Covid-19 pandemic.Will Juliette get the wedding of her dreams? Or will Nick succeed in ruining yet another wedding day?Wednesday 24th JuneAnother meeting with our wedding planner today – this time about party favours.Cressida showed us cute little hangover kits, personalised wine glasses, mini champagne bottles, chocolate truffle boxes, watches, toiletries, all sorts. There was even a monogrammed rum and Coca Cola can and a little treasure chest of sugared almonds, should we choose a Caribbean destination wedding.When Nick and I got married, all we thought about was drink, food and the church, in that order.Who knew there was so much sparkle and magic in the wedding world?Perfect for Jill Mansell and Unmumsy Mum fans. Can be read as a stand-along novel or as part of the series. Download this Kindle Unlimited comedy as part of your subscription.Editorial Reviews for Suzy K Quinn‘Suzy K Quinn is the literary equivalent of hot chocolate …’ – Liza Foreman, New York Times journalist'Suzy K Quinn is a born storyteller' -- Erin Kelly, bestselling author of He Said, She Said.'I read Suzy’s latest novel in one sitting, with a break for sleep. This does not usually happen. It's a terrific read.' -- Fay Weldon, author of the Lives and Loves of a She Devil.'Unputdownable. I was completely absorbed.' -- Julia Crouch, author of Cuckoo'A seriously skilful page turner ... don't read it on the beach unless you want sunburn.' -- Kate Harrison, author of The Secret Shopper's RevengeThe writing is skilful and vivid and the tension doesn't let up. Suzy K Quinn is one to watch.' -- Julia Gregson, author of East of the Sun“Funny, real, honest, and raw—this is an excellent book about the roller-coaster that is being a mum.” —Charlene Wedgner“Books like this, books that share honest and realistic experiences are a breath of fresh air.” —Diary of a Book Mum“I just love its honesty/real-ness and the way it ends on such a high note helped me to realize what a privilege it is to be a parent.” —Busy Mama Book Club“The reason I loved this book so much was the honesty of it! Unlike other parenting books nothing is sugar coated! This is Motherhood!! You will find yourself relating to almost everything she writes!” —B Club Betty“Would highly recommend this book for anyone looking for a fun and honest read about parenting.” —Em Digs Books“It’s funny, it’s quick, short chapters, all of these things are really important, easy read, when you’re a sleep deprived new mother. I really wish I had it when I was a new mum five years ago.” —The Motherload Book Club“A real breath of fresh air and a massive reality check for when you’re trying to be the perfect mum.” —Mrs Cooke’s Books“Had me in fits of laughter…I really do applaud Suzy for being so honest …She really does tell it like it is, which is that parenthood is a challenge but it’s totally worth it!” —Kirsty’s Book Buying AddictionAbout the AuthorSuzy is a bestselling British fiction author. Her books have sold nearly 1 million copies and been translated into nine different languages.
Hatched!: The Big Push from Pregnancy to Motherhood
Sloane Tanen - 2007
From epidurals and stretch marks to diaper rash and day care, never before have the joys, trials, and tribulations of having and raising a baby been so ingeniously and truthfully rendered. Hatched! is the one book you need to keep you laughing through your pregnancy and first year of motherhood. PRAISE: "There are two stars in Tanen's books: her vermouth-sloshed wit shot through with a neurotic darkness, and miniature chenille chickens toting fingernail-sized Louis Vuitton bags ... [In] her new book, "Hatched! The Big Push From Pregnancy to Motherhood," ...[Tanen] redirected her alkaline humor at her fellow high-end parents. Now the chicks are obsessed with Baby Uggs, Bugaboo Strollers and whether their babies will master Mommy and Me yoga classes." -Los Angeles Times "Sometimes, the best gift for a mom is a laugh. Even the most sleep-deprived mother would be hard-pressed not to break a smile at Sloane Tanen's little toy chicken tableaus in 'Hatched!: The Big Push from Pregnancy to Motherhood.' It takes other authors entire memoirs to skewer some of the same targets that Tanen does in one-page zingers."-Seattle Times "With witty photographs...and droll captions...it's the perfect gift for the pending or new mother. It's certainly good for some big belly laughs."-Daily News "Sloane Tanen's latest work Hatched! is a hilarious, totally original take on the trials and traumas of pregnancy and motherhood. And by the way, Hatched! is THE PERFECT BABY SHOWER GIFT. We highly recommend." -Mommy Track'd "If best-selling author Sloane Tanen's books Bitter with Baggage Seeks Same and Going for the Bronze-both of which are illustrated with chickens-left you chuckling and buying copies for friends, wait until you flip thro
A Nasty Bit of Rough
David Feherty - 2002
In this first volume of his misadventures, Gussett sets his sights on the most prestigious prize in golf, the petrified middle finger of St. Andrew, patron saint of Scotland. Presiding over the world's most cantankerous golf club, Gussett must motivate his members through battles with incontinence, single malt Scotch, and a litany of other unmentionable afflictions in a friendly competition with their ancient rivals, the notorious McGregor clan. Anyone who loves the game or knows someone who does will be unable to resist Feherty's hilarious storytelling and golfing gravitas.
The Beatrice Letters
Lemony Snicket - 2006
How I pity these readers. With all due respect, Lemony Snicket
CFI! The Book: A Satirical Aviation Comedy
Alex Stone - 2018
The planes break, the regs break, metal gets bent, students are lost at sea, and a Top Gun wannabe student, who has four hundred hours of flight instruction, still hasn’t made his first solo flight. “CFI! The Book” is an over-the-top satirical aviation comedy that’s loosely based on real world experiences of flight instruction, but if the FAA asks, this is all strictly fictional.
Mythfits
Heide Goody - 2016
WHAT are the dangers of getting directions from a fairy tale frog? WHERE do archangels go to kick back and relax? HOW can a garden gnome mend a broken heart? WHO is the last person you’d expect to visit you at Christmas? WHY shouldn’t you let Satan organise your funeral? Find out the answers to these and other pressing questions in this collection of short stories from the authors of the Clovenhoof series.
The Twin Flame Game
Adam Eccles - 2018
A group of passionate people, convinced their twin soul is somewhere roaming on the Earth and they must find and be with that person.It’s an unexploited vein of gold for a womaniser like Keith.He uses his cunning and jet-set lifestyle to the aid the task of bedding as many women as possible in a hilarious search for his one true love and soul mate. Pausing to help some lost souls along the way.But will he find her? And if he does, can he hold on to her?Your twin flame will be your mirror image, the yang to your yin. Be careful what you wish for. Your life and plans just might get turned upside-down.When the fires of passion have flickered out with a whimper, try kindling a new flame. Journey through the modern dating minefields and see if you can make it out in one piece.
Don Quixote, U.S.A.
Richard Powell - 1966
He has, however, been a disappointment to his family in several ways: In appearance he is insignificant looking both in face and figure; he went to the University of Florida instead of Harvard where his forbears had been mainstays of the varsity crew for generations, and he studied agriculture instead of pointing himself toward a career in banking, bonds, or law. To say the least he is not apparently the stuff from which heroes are fashioned.As an agricultural expert specializing in fruit farming, Arthur becomes a Peace Corps volunteer and is assigned to the Republic of San Marco in the Caribbean. This weak-chinned Don Quixote soon acquires his Sancho Panza in the person of a rascally eleven-year-old boy, Pepe, who makes a bargain to be paid 400 pesos each time he saves Arthur's life. (The payments mount alarmingly!)The island's dictator thinks he can use Arthur to obtain military supplies with which to wipe out the band of guerillas in the hills who oppose his corrupt dictatorship. Failing in this the dictator decides to murder Goodpasture and cause an international incident by blaming it on the guerillas. This, he reasons, will bring the U.S. in to help stamp out the rebels.This plan also backfires (with Pepe's help, of course) and Goodpasture is taken prisoner and when they see he is a harmless eccentric he is appointed chief cook for the guerillas. From then on Arthur's life becomes a series of misadventures through which he moves serenely and from which he generally emerges unscathed (again with Pepe's assistance) until he surprisingly finds himself the guerillas' leader.Following one of the funniest bloodless revolutions imaginable Arthur Peabody Goodpasture ends up as Arthur el Gavilan, the new dictator of San Marco. "His strength was as the strength of ten because his heart was pure."
Stilettos & Stubble
Amanda Egan - 2012
Criticised by her outwardly perfect mother, dearly loved by her father, she’s the ‘Queen of Low Self-Esteem’. Finding herself suddenly immersed in a world of glitz and glamour, where nothing is quite as it seems, will she finally realise ... ... ‘It’s what’s inside that counts’?
Bored of the Rings
Rich Amooi - 2017
Her eccentric, free-spirited Aunt Greta wholeheartedly disagrees and dishes out unsolicited dating advice based on her five marriages. But when a jaw-dropping gorgeous architect waltzes into town to build a resort on Abby’s favorite hiking spot, she will do anything to stop him, including befriending him. Though Abby and James are at odds property-wise, things spice up in this fast-paced romantic comedy over late night Scrabble games and hotter-than-hell Chinese food, leaving Abby to wonder if the property that really needs protecting is the one around her heart.
Mrs Caldicot's Cabbage War
Vernon Coleman - 2002
The novel has been filmed with Pauline Collins as Mrs Caldicot and John Alderton as the nursing home owner. This is the first Mrs Caldicot novel. (The second, which continues the story, is Mrs Caldicot's Knickerbocker Glory.) Both book and film have been widely praised. The Times described it as `Funny and poignant'. The Daily Express called it a `fairytale comedy'. The Daily Telegraph called it `Funny and poignant and socially relevant'. Cinema audiences stood and cheered at the end when the film was shown. The first of the books and films to see life through the eyes of the older citizen. `Mrs Caldicot's Cabbage War made me laugh out loud. Dr Coleman's lightness of touch and direct prose are all that one could wish for.' - Maxwell Craven in the Derby Evening Telegraph `Vernon Coleman really captures the personality of Mrs Caldicot. You'll be hooked and won't be able to put it down.' - Newton Abbott & Mid Devon `Understated British classic.' - Express and Echo `Funny and thought provoking novel.' - Western Morning News 'Funny and poignant...about a woman who decides to fight back, transforming the lives of those around her.' - The Times '...typically understated British classic.' - Express & Echo 'Humour, pathos and sympathy.' -Evening standard 'Witty, poignant and beautifully written' - Western Mail '...a little British comedy with a big heart.' Financial Times The author, Vernon Coleman, is a qualified doctor who has written over 100 books - many of which have appeared on bestseller lists. His books have sold over two million hardback and paperback copies in the UK and been translated into 24 languages. There is a list of his other novels on his Amazon author site. Bestselling non-fiction books include Bodypower. He is also the author of How to Stop Your Doctor Killing You. What the papers say about Vernon Coleman: Coleman is a very funny writer - This England Vernon Coleman writes brilliant books - The Good Book Guide No thinking person can ignore him - The Ecologist A godsend - Daily Telegraph Superstar - Independent on Sunday Compulsive reading - The Guardian His message is important - The Economist His advice is optimistic and enthusiastic - British Medical Journal The man is a national treasure - What doctors don't tell you Its impossible not to be impressed - Western Daily Press Outspoken and alert - Sunday Express Marvellously succinct, refreshingly sensible - The Spectator Probably one of the most brilliant men alive today - Irish Times King of the media docs - The Independent Britain's leading medical author - The Star Britain's leading health care campaigner - The Sun The patients' champion - Birmingham Post The doctor who dares to speak his mind - Oxford Mail He writes lucidly and wittily - Good Housekeeping etc etc
The Ricky Gervais Guide to... MEDICINE
Ricky Gervais - 2010
Here's the first in a new series of in-depth discussions on a variety of subjects relating to humanity's greatest endeavors.Around the table, Ricky Gervais, Steve Merchant, and the glabrous luminary Karl Pilkington.In this episode, MEDICINE, we explore the treatment of human ailments through history - from trepanation (or 'oles in the 'ed) in early tribal societies right through to the possible, if improbable, future of medical technology.Ricky Steve and Karl offer a uniquely ill-informed appraisal, from medicine's superstitious roots in shamanism, the beginnings of empiricism and on to today's holistic ideal.Areas of discussion include the dangers of leaving yoghurt pots in fridges; how over-enthusiastic janitors can stifle scientific progress; how hygiene impacts on immunity; Karl's ideas on empathic diagnosis; fruit-based contraception; the risks of eye surgery; the politics of treating obesity; conjugal care-workers; geriatric clinical trials; Karl's take on palliative care; and the inevitable anal-probing....
Take Us To Your Trump
Andrew Stanek - 2018
Okay yes, all that stuff too, but I'm not talking about that right now. The government has also been lying to us about space aliens. Aliens have landed on the National Mall and are asking to speak with the President of the United States. For the sake of the planet, diplomat Michael Wallenson is tasked with keeping them away from Donald Trump at all costs. Will Michael succeed? Or will these heavily armed, easily offended aliens succeed in reaching our leader? Building the border dome, coal-powered missiles, and the true identities of the men in black - all in Take Us To Your Trump, another hilarious satirical comedy from author Andrew Stanek.