She knows you'll probably never believe her side of the story, so she also interviews friends, ex-friends, and her acupuncturist about her history of substance abuse, flailing through her twenties and what kind of person she really is.About the AuthorBoston born and raised television writer, blogger, internet personality and HelloGiggles.com co-founder Molly McAleer currently resides in Los Angeles and lives in constant fear that she's going to be homeless or go to prison for committing vehicular manslaughter. Her writing has appeared on over 25 websites and her Twitter was hailed as "one of nine to follow amongst millions" by The New York Times. She needs to touch a dog (any dog) at least once a day and hates eating, people who make fun of Juggalos and the circus. You can listen to her advice podcast, "Plz Advise" on iTunes and SoundCloud.

    In her latest work It’s Not Me, It’s You, she unabashedly showcases a life well lived, ignoring all wisdom, but yet somehow, coming out on top. Combining her trademark biting wit and straightforward common sense, the anticipated comedic memoir delivers outrageous tales from all periods of her life and family history. From Taylor’s outlook on working hard (audition for a game show instead) to getting her husband to propose (forget The Rules: try nagging and physical violence) these stories venture beyond daycare, sure to entertain both parents and non-parents alike. Covering a wide range of topics that explore the anxiety, frustration, and exhaustion that accompany the rewarding, comical, awe-inspiring, and life-altering roles of parent, teenager, wife, and daughter, It’s Not Me, It’s You offers readers an escape, empathy, and plenty of laughs.

    In typical fashion, he responded to the birth of his son by forming a mediocre rock band and taking it on tour. Now, in Alternadad, he tells the hilarious and poignant story of how he learned to be a father to his son, Elijah, after the failure of his short-lived rock-n-roll dreams.Pollack and his wife, Regina, were determined to raise their son without growing up too much themselves. They welcomed the responsibility but were worried that they'd become uptight and out of touch. Through the ups and downs of the first years of their son's life their determination is put to the test, and they find themselves changing in ways they never expected, particularly after Elijah develops a biting problem in preschool.Alternadad is a refreshingly honest book about the wonders, terrors, and idiocies of parenting today. From enrolling his son in an absurd corporate gymnastics class to a disastrous visit to a rock festival to uncomfortable encounters with other parents whom he'd ordinarily avoid, Pollack candidly explores the everyday struggles and the long-term compromises that come with parenthood.Mixing ironic skepticism with an appreciation for the absurdities of everyday life, Alternadad is a portrait of a new version of the American family: responsible if unorthodox parents raising kids who know the difference between the Ramones and the Sex Pistols. Wildly funny, surprising, and often moving, it just might be the parenting bible for a new generation of mothers and fathers.

    This could be due to the nearsightedness that presented itself in third grade when she became known as four-eyed Smelly Kelly, but it’s not. According to her high school Journalism teacher, Potter has a unique perspective and outlook on life. She still doesn’t know if that was a compliment or an insult – or perhaps, just a nice way to say she’s weird. In this collection of essays, Four Eyes Were Never Better Than Two…and other observations, Potter offers a candid look at the human condition with tales recounting the past and present. From her younger days of dreaming about being a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader so she could own pom-poms to sex education taught by a Joyce Dewitt look-alike, Potter confesses all – including the ironic account of throwing up on a dog named Ralph. No stranger to embarrassment, she writes of cold sores that require an exorcism and the torture that was seventh grade gym class, capturing the angst, humiliation, and absurdity in those moments that often define us as individuals. Observations include: desperation can make a person do some pretty stupid things like answering a personal ad, hot wax is best left in the hands of a professional if you value your lips, and nothing is so surprising as the man who claims to hate dancing busting a move in a hospital recovery room. Even if you’ve never had to admit in a public setting that you’re having your period, passed out at the eye doctor’s office, or had an illogical fear of a lawn mower, Potter’s self-deprecating wit and sometimes bizarre sense of humor will make you glad these things only happen on sit-coms… or to her.

    It wasn't with my husband." Romi Lassally provides a judgment-free zone where women can reveal their mommy misdemeanors. From not feeling like cleaning up vomit in the middle of the night, to barking something completely inappropriate to the children, to wanting to be pawed by hands that aren't covered in jelly, the confessions pour in daily. Heartfelt and hilarious, naughty and nasty, frank and outrageous, the confessions culled together for this book represent the best-or the worst?-of those humbling hidden secrets of motherhood in all its glorious messiness as improvisation and triage. They dare to suggest that it's okay for moms to make mistakes, to have unkind thoughts, to publicly or privately embarrass themselves-and above all to be human.

    “Half memoir, half polemic, and entirely necessary,” (Elle UK), Moran’s debut was an instant runaway bestseller in England as well as an Amazon UK Top Ten book of the year; still riding high on bestseller lists months after publication, it is a bona fide cultural phenomenon. Now poised to take American womanhood by storm, here is a book that Vanity Fair calls “the U.K. version of Tina Fey’s Bossypants….You will laugh out loud, wince, and—in my case—feel proud to be the same gender as the author.”

    and I am wide awake because the man of the house has decided that he needs to perform a series of complex manoeuvres that involve him balancing on his left elbow. When I fell asleep last night, there was a baby lying next to me. Her smelly diaper is still wedged on my head but aside from this rather damp clue, I can't seem to find her anywhere. I could ask my mother-in-law if she has seen the baby, but she may just tell me that I need to fast on alternate Mondays, and God will deliver the baby back to me . . . Full of wit and delicious observations, Mrs Funnybones captures the life of the modern Indian woman—a woman who organizes dinner each evening, even as she goes to work all day, who runs her own life but has to listen to her Mummyji, who worries about her weight and the state of the country. Based on Twinkle Khanna’s super-hit column, Mrs Funnybones marks the debut of one of our funniest, most original voices.

    Sam Halpern, who is "like Socrates, but angrier, and with worse hair," has never minced words, and when Justin moved back home, he began to record all the ridiculous things his dad said to him:"That woman was sexy. . . . Out of your league? Son, let women figure out why they won't screw you. Don't do it for them.""Do people your age know how to comb their hair? It looks like two squirrels crawled on their heads and started fucking.""The worst thing you can be is a liar. . . . Okay, fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but then number two is liar. Nazi one, liar two."More than a million people now follow Mr. Halpern's philosophical musings on Twitter, and in this book, his son weaves a brilliantly funny, touching coming-of-age memoir around the best of his quotes. An all-American story that unfolds on the Little League field, in Denny's, during excruciating family road trips, and, most frequently, in the Halperns' kitchen over bowls of Grape-Nuts, Sh*t My Dad Says is a chaotic, hilarious, true portrait of a father-son relationship from a major new comic voice.

    Critics have called her "sweet, adorable, and vicious." But there is so much more to be said about Samantha Bee. For one, she's Canadian. Whatever that means. And now, she opens up for the very first time about her checkered Canadian past. With charming candor, she admits to her Lennie from "Of Mice and Men"-style love of baby animals, her teenage crime spree as one-half of a car-thieving couple (Bonnie and Clyde in Bermuda shorts and braces), and the fact that strangers seem compelled to show her their genitals. She also details her intriguing career history, which includes stints working in a frame store, at a penis clinic, and as a Japanese anime character in a touring children's show.Samantha delves into all these topics and many more in this thoroughly hilarious, unabashedly frank collection of personal essays. Whether detailing the creepiness that ensues when strangers assume that your mom is your lesbian lover, or recalling her girlhood crush on Jesus (who looked like Kris Kristofferson and sang like Kenny Loggins), Samantha turns the spotlight on her own imperfect yet highly entertaining life as relentlessly as she skewers hapless interview subjects on "The Daily Show." She shares her unique point of view on a variety of subjects as wide ranging as her deep affinity for old people, to her hatred of hot ham. It's all here, in irresistible prose that will leave you in stitches and eager for more.

    But you know what? It's hard enough to be an adult. You have to dress yourself and pay bills and remember to buy birthday gifts. You have to drive and get annual physicals and tip for good service. Some adults take on the added burden of caring for a tiny human being with no language skills or bladder control. Parenthood can be very rewarding, but let's face it, so are margaritas at the adults-only pool. Jen's stand-up routine includes lots of jokes about not having kids (and some about masturbation and Johnny Depp), after which complete strangers constantly approach her and ask, "But who will take care of you when you're old?" (Servants!) Some insist, "You'd be such a great mom!" (Really? You know me so well!) Whether living rent-free in her childhood bedroom while trying to break into comedy (the best free birth control around, she says), or taking the stage at major clubs and joining a hit TV show—and along the way getting married, divorced, and attending excruciating afternoon birthday parties for her parent friends—Jen is completely happy and fulfilled by her decision not to procreate. I Can Barely Take Care of Myself is a beacon of hilarious hope for anyone whose major life decisions have been questioned by friends, family, and strangers in a comedy club bathroom. And it should satisfy everyone who wonders if Jen will ever know true love without looking into the eyes of her child.

     She’s living what should be the good life in sunny Los Angeles. After a writing gig with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, she scored parts in blockbuster movies, which led to memorable recurring roles on HBO’s Hung and Looking. She had a loving husband and an adorable baby boy. In Fresh Perspectives on Having It All, she turns a piercingly observant, darkly funny lens on the ways her life is actually Not Okay. She tells the story of her husband’s affair with their nanny, her first and only threesome, a tattoo gone horribly awry, and how the birth of her son caused mama drama with her own mother and birth mother with laugh-out-loud wit and a powerful undercurrent of vulnerability that pulls off a stunning balance between comedy and tragedy.

    And after a lifetime of being clueless, Druckerman can finally grasp the subtext of conversations, maintain (somewhat) healthy relationships and spot narcissists before they ruin her life.What are the modern forties, and what do we know once we reach them? What makes someone a "grown-up" anyway? And why didn't anyone warn us that we'd get cellulite on our arms? Part frank memoir, part hilarious investigation of daily life, There Are No Grown-Ups diagnoses the in-between decade when...- Everyone you meet looks a little bit familiar. - You're matter-of-fact about chin hair. - You can no longer wear anything ironically.- There's at least one sport your doctor forbids you to play. - You become impatient while scrolling down to your year of birth. - Your parents have stopped trying to change you.- You don't want to be with the cool people anymore; you want to be with your people. - You realize that everyone is winging it, some just do it more confidently. - You know that it's ok if you don't like jazz.Internationally best-selling author and New York Times contributor Pamela Druckerman leads us on a quest for wisdom, self-knowledge and the right pair of pants. A witty dispatch from the front lines of the forties, There Are No Grown-ups is a (midlife) coming-of-age story, and a book for anyone trying to find their place in the world.

    CNN has described him as "having the world's most interesting job." Read about Lansky's experiences: fending off hippos with a canoe paddle on the Zambezi Rivertest driving Ferraris in Italysurviving the world's largest tomato fight in Spainswimming with dolphins off the coast of New Zealandblowgun hunting with the Jaguar Indians in the Amazonriding an ostrich in South Africalassoing reindeer above the Arctic Circlewrestling an alligator in Floridaplaying ice golf in Finland

    Then you’re screwed.But wait, there’s hope: Scary Mommy Guide to Surviving the Holidays to the rescue!Yes, in this handy holiday guide, you’ll find everything you need to survive the fall/winter rush of cheer in style, and without having a mental breakdown. From relatable, hilarious essays on everything from the Santa myth to being seated at the dreaded kids’ table, to easy-to-follow recipes that might include just a little something special to take the edge off (can anyone say Kahlua?), to fun and accessible gift ideas, this book is your ticket to peace of mind—and a laugh—during the busy, crazy holiday season!

    Whether you're carving evil messages into your coworker's banana peel or telling your kids that, yes, raisins are actually dehydrated people, there's a certain, sinister-yet-fun draw to really messing with people. In Perhaps I’ve Said Too Much (the much anticipated follow-up to the heralded, award-winning Things Go Wrong For Me), Rodney Lacroix gives the reader some insight on what it's like to live the prankster life. No one is safe, including Rodney himself as not all of his antics go entirely as planned. Join him as he spins some yarns, gives you some new ideas and lets you relive the catastrophic consequences of jokes gone terribly wrong. Complete with original hand-drawn artwork and graphics, one-two punch Brain Nuggets, and the ever-popular Draw Something Files, Perhaps will not disappoint.* (Assumes you are an immature child who enjoys potty humor and making fart noises with your armpits.)