Like the bungling burglar who logged on to his own Facebook page at his victim's house - and forgot to turn the computer off when he left, or the stupid bank robber who made his escape in his own car - complete with personalised number plates, or the idiotic criminal who tried to hand himself into the police... in order to collect the reward. Award-winning writer Andrew Penman has scoured the country for this hilarious collection of those who are not just bad, but also dim very dim. 'Andrew Penman enjoys a laugh at the expense of Britain's most stupid burglars' - The Mirror 'Exploits so dim-witted it's surprising they ever managed to keep themselves breathing long enough to commit any crime' - Wales Online Illustrated with cartoons drawn by Neil Kerber.

    They are first- generation Americans, citizens of other nations, and lifelong New Yorkers. But they all share one thing: They honor their loved ones by living their lives with purpose, and a promise to never forget.These courageous family members share their grief and loss-and hope- speaking in their own words, with love, courage, and strength enough to inspire us all.

    All you have to do is stop waiting and start acting!Have you ever wondered why some people seem to get everything easily while others don't? Are you tired of waiting for your life to change? How long are you willing to wait till your circumstances change magically?30 Days is a simple, fast-paced book where you will learn what it takes to create the life you want.In this book, international bestselling author Marc Reklau introduces the readers to some proventips, tricks and exercises that can improve their life beyond imagination! All it takes is followingthem constantly and persistently.More good news: You can start by creating new habits and working towards your goals consistently,doing things that bring you closer to your goals every single day. This book shows you how tomake it possible. You can do it! You deserve it!Thirty days does make a difference and you CAN really create a happier, healthier and wealthierlife. All you have to do is stop waiting and start acting!

    A guide to the Nikon D3100 camera provides information on the camera's scene modes, composition, focus, lighting, and composition to take successful portraits and sports and landscape photographs.

     What if you could start your day out with an excited shout instead of a frustrated sigh? Unfortunately, selling handmade goods online is no longer as simple as throwing together a product listing and waiting for sales to roll in. There are now millions of people with handmade products and they are all eager to build a sustainable income. The Handmade Entrepreneur uses precise methods based on proven marketing techniques to set you above the competition. It teaches you how to create a genuine business you can count on rather than a bundle of shop pages and social media accounts built on a foundation of guesswork. What You Can Expect to Learn from This Book: • How to take DIY pictures that get clicks and sales • How to set up a shop that turns visitors into buyers in under two seconds • How to price your items • How to write titles and descriptions • How to brand your business with DIY techniques • How to rank your pages • How to find targeted audiences • How to build up your list of followers • Where to promote your listings • How to sell without selling • How to form relationships with people who can send you extra sales • How to start a "buzz" about your products • Which tools to incorporate into your business The goal of this book is to free you from having to rely on any third-party website for your sales. Yes, you can take advantage of platforms like Etsy, and you should, but websites come and go, and if all your sales come only from that website, you run into trouble every time there are algorithm changes, a saturation of sellers, or cheaper products to compete with. You are trying to generate sales, which means that you are trying to run a business, which in-turn means that you need a real business plan. Brick and motor stores don't just buy a bunch of goods, throw them in a building, and hope people will come. They plan, study their target market, pick a perfect store location, and prepare to market themselves. Just because you sell online does not mean that you can skip all of these steps. You have billions of products to compete with online and a crowd of shoppers who have an overwhelming number of options before them. You must prepare your storefront, get your products ready, know your audience, and then know how to market to them. Optimizing Your Shop for Sales Dani starts out showing you how to prepare your products with photos that attract clicks and sales. It doesn't just tell you how to do it, though. It SHOWS you. Thanks to the help of many carefully selected Etsy sellers, there are many example photos for each point. In addition to this, the author only shows you DIY photos to prove that you can do it all on your own. Next, Dani discusses how to optimize your shop. She goes through every aspect such as banners, profiles, descriptions, tags, and titles. You will learn how to optimize your pages so that people stay there instead of leaving instantly. This can be done by creating an inviting environment with images and content that buyers can skim through in under two seconds. If buyers can determine that your page is worth staying on in less than two seconds, you have won the battle. Finding Targeted Audiences and Marketing The issue with selling online is finding people who would be interested in your products.

    You simply move more deeply into them. For anyone - the kettlebell novice to the 15-year veteran - this short (read: just 30 page) ebook provides the perfect foundation or refresher of the fundamental kettlebell techniques, including the kettlebell swing, goblet squat, snatch, Turkish get up, clean, and military press. Each movement has detailed instructions plus step-by-step photos to help the reader understand the movements as well as safely and effectively execute them. After we discuss the hows of each of the basic movements, we move into applying what we've learned with a simple, straightforward kettlebell program for strength, muscle, mobility, conditioning, and (for those who want it) weight loss. This 7-day program can be run through just once as a refresher or for up to six weeks as a standalone program. This book includes: *The following kettlebell exercises: Kettlebell swing, goblet squat, snatch, Turkish get up, clean, and military press. *Each kettlebell exercise features a detailed description of the movement, step-by-step photos and key points. *A straightforward and simple 7-day program (repeatable for up to 6 weeks) to help the novice acclimate to kettlebell training or for the kettlebell veteran hone their technique and skills.

    Here's how Dr Coleman describes this book: `However good your doctor is, and however much you may trust him or her, you must share the responsibility for your own health, and you must know when to tell your doctor if you think that the treatment with which he or she is providing you, could be causing problems. After all, if things go wrong, your nice friendly doctor is more likely to kill you than is a burglar a deranged relative or a drunken motorist. Remember: one in six people in hospital are there because they have been made ill by a doctor. I have built this book around ther twelve basic laws of medicine which I have, over the years, formulated for my own benefit as a doctor, an observer and a patient. I have illustrated each of the 12 laws with clinical anecdotes and scientific data.' Here, for example, is Coleman's First Law of Medicine: `If you are receiving treatment for an existing disease and you develop new symptoms then, until proved otherwise, you should assume that the new symptoms are caused by the treatment you are receiving.' Dr Vernon Coleman is the author of over 100 books - many of them international bestsellers. His books have sold over two million copies in hardback and paperback in the UK alone and have been translated into 25 languages. Dr Coleman has written columns and articles for many of the world's leading newspapers and magazines and has presented numerous TV and radio programmes based on his books. In the mid 1980s he devised the world's first medical software for use on home computers. For more information about Dr Coleman's books please see the Vernon Coleman page on Amazon or visit www.vernoncoleman.com What the papers say: Vernon Coleman writes brilliant books - Good Book Guide The calmest voice of reason - The Observer A godsend - Daily Telegraph Brilliant - The People No thinking person can ignore him - The Ecologist Marvellously succinct, refreshingly sensible - The Spectator Probably one of the most brilliant men alive today - Irish Times King of the media docs - The Independent Britain's leading health care campaigner - The Sun Britain's leading medical author - The Star Perhaps the best known health writer for the general public in the world today - The Therapist The patient's champion - Birmingham Post A persuasive writer whose arguments, based on research and experience, are sound - Nursing Standard The doctor who dares to speak his mind - Oxford Mail He writes lucidly and wittily - Good Housekeeping The man is a national treasure - What doctors don't tell you Compulsive reading - The Guardian His message is important - The Economist Revered guru of medicine - Nursing Times His advice is optimistic and enthusiastic - British Medical Journal It's impossible not to be impressed - Western Daily Press Outspoken and alert - Sunday Express Hard hitting - inimitably forthright - Hull Daily Mail Refreshingly forthright - Liverpool Daily Post Dr Coleman made me think again - BBC World Service

    In Glasgow, in the 1980s neither the Police nor the Public could understand why grown men were fighting over the rights to sell ice cream, the violence was extreme, and the streets of the housing estates were turned into war zones. Crowds of youths gathered on the street corners, while adults hung from their flat windows watching real-life scenes far more exciting than anything they could see on TV the smashing of Ice cream vans and cars, slashings and stabbings of rival Ice cream men were a nightly occurrence. And the reason behind the violence was that you could earn more money selling Ice cream than you could from selling drugs. The lack of shops in the vast run-down housing estates with thousands of families who had money to spend was a captured market providing an excellent living for the Italian families who controlled the Ice cream trade in Glasgow. Tam McGraw was building a reputation as an up and coming gangster who led a team that specialised in post office, factory, and cash and carry raids throughout Scotland. Tam McGraw realised that he could earn a lot more money a much easier way than robbing post offices, he could sell Ice cream. But first Tam had to test the strength of the Italians and the reaction of the police. McGraw went for the jugular right from the start. He knew Marchetti would not give in easily, and they would try to defend their territory. So he started with Carntyne one of Marchetti's most lucrative routes. Marchetti Brothers were about to suffer brutality and destruction of a kind they could never have imagined in their wildest nightmares. McGraw planned to be the Ice Cream King of Scotland, and Carntyne is where he would lay the foundations of his throne. Nothing or no one would stand in his way. This is the real story of the Glasgow Ice Cream Van Wars. The shocking violence mixed with a decent portion of Glaswegian humour will keep you turning the pages until the end. Written in a broad Glaswegian dialect with a lot of swearing, the author writes as he speaks. This book might not be suitable for those who prefer perfect grammar and proper English. But if you can see past that then I am sure you will find it an enjoyable read. Teddy Rennoc.

    Join this pregnant mom of two as she journeys yet again through the rough and tumble life of a pregger. Boldly proclaiming taboo truths on those touchy subjects that books gloss over and doctors 'forget' to mention.

    

    Updated just in time for 2016, this guide is the freshest on the market. Amazon Echo is not just a piece of hardware, it is not just the cylindrical product it appears to be. It is a revolutionary facilitator of your dream lifestyle, and the great news is that it just keeps on improving with every update! Amazon Echo takes the Intelligent Personal Assistant market from binary to human. The times of receiving unconvincing, often unhelpful and completely robotic responses from our devices is over and Echo is here to lead the way. Aside from covering the basics in detail, from unpacking to set-up to synchronization with your home devices, this user guide will cover the full range of features on offer with your Amazon Echo. Changing your wake word Understanding and using your Dialog History Controlling parts of your home with your voice How to use the Amazon Echo app How to get Echo to give you information, from live sports scores to the weather in Dubai! How to stream music through Echo's impressive speakers How to shop with your voice Why you will never need an alarm clock again How to handle the Kitchen with Echo's help Travel and traffic information specific to your journey or commute How to manage your shopping and to-do list How to enjoy Audibles wide range of audio books with your Amazon Echo Getting the latest news Some funny little Easter eggs that are built into the device! And plenty more! Amazon Echo is changing people's lives all over the world and this guide will help you change your own. If you are deciding whether to purchase the device, have a read through my guide and I'm certain by the time you are finished, there will be only one option in your mind! This book is available through Kindle Unlimited.

    

    This guidebook includes the island's history, culture and all of its significant archaeological sites. It also contains all of the practical information needed for your visit, including island activities and up-to-date restaurant and shopping recommendations. It will also tell you the best times to visit the sites in order to get the optimal light for photography and to avoid the crowds, as well as many other 'local' tips that no other guidebook will tell you. Contains over 100 color photos of Easter Island, as well as color maps of both the island and the one town, Hanga Roa. New, Updated edition (2014).

    Finally, he was being acknowledged as a worldwide sensation in his role as the irrepressible ‘Mammy’ Agnes Brown.Over the last few years, Brendan has spread his wings to taste success as an author, a playwright, a comedian, an actor, a television star and more, picking up major awards along the way. But it hasn’t always been a bed of roses for the Dubliner, who started off life working as a waiter before evolving into the hardest working man in showbiz.Born in 1955 as the youngest of 11 children, he grew up in a two-bedroom corporation house in the rough-and-tumble working class area of Finglas in north Dublin. After his father Gerard died, when Brendan was just seven years old, his formidable mother Maureen – who influenced Brendan’s future career – raised him on his own.Life truly didn’t begin until 40 for Brendan, who left school aged just 12 and tried his hand at anything to earn a living, including jobs as a milkman, DJ, bar manager and painter and decorator. But after being persuaded to have a go on the comedy circuit it was the the beginning of a new dawn in Brendan’s life that would see him become the man with the Midas touch.In the years since, his work rate has become phenomenal as his earthy comedy has become a global hit, he found love again with his second wife and co-star Jennifer Gibney and he has become rich beyond his wildest dreams thanks to his foul-mouthed matriarch Mrs Brown.In this first ever biography of the star, David O’Dornan reveals the extraordinary rags to riches journey Brendan O’Carroll has made to become a comedy genius loved by millions of devoted fans. This is a must-read book for any fan and includes exclusive interviews with those nearest and dearest to the star.

    They knew that it was a massive gamble. Their friends called them brave. Their families thought that they had either gone completely mad or were dreaming of a delusional easy life in the sun. In the event none of these assumptions were completely accurate. Moving and funny, this is the story of the trials and tribulations involved in buying and converting their new house. The challenges of starting a new business in a foreign land, speaking a language they had struggled to learn thirty years previously and had since forgotten. But ultimately of fulfilling their ambition to work, laugh and play in the beautiful town of Sarlat.