It's OK." Over one hundred contributors share their failures, setbacks and most embarrassing moments for this compilation of hilarity with the hopes that their stories would give the embarrassed and struggling souls some comic and inspirational relief. Life is riddled with pain, disappointments, and failures, but given enough time, they're folly. "We're All A Mess. It's OK" captures life's most absurd moments honestly and without a filter. It's filled with funny essays and one-liners that highlight the grainier sides of being human and imperfect. The book covers everything from horrible internet dating experiences, the strangest of co-workers, vacations that went array, to the worst holiday gifts of all time. It's an anthology of real-life disasters. You'll enjoy comedian/actor Kim Banta's tale, "My First Date and a Sluggish Toilet," detailing a first date in the nicest home in town, ending with an overflowing toilet and panicked placement of poo into her purse. And... "You Must Have Me Confused With Someone Else" depicts Dane Levent's severe behavior problems with her golden retriever, Buddy, after picking him up from boarding, only to find out a week later that she had the wrong dog. And... "He's Worth the Wait" by Bes. D describes her mother-in-law's long-term relationship with a convicted felon she had met on Meet-An-Inmate.com. And... "Saying ‘I'm Sorry' Will Not Fix This Situation" by Ashley P. is a hilarious tale of turning her best date into her worst date by leaping onto her partner's lap, causing what is called in medical terminology, a penile fracture. And... Follow along with Traci Jo's daily embarrassment by her mother, picking her up from school wearing different wigs, such as Dorothy Hamill and Marilyn Monroe. And... Read an entire chapter dedicated to strange conditions, such as Shelley Miner Gardler's need to gather her pets before she goes to work to tell them goodbye and to assign one to be in charge while she's away. And... Discover why Christine T sorts M&Ms in ROYGBIV order and eats them first by frequency until they're even, and then one of each color in order, until they're gone. These humorous essays and quips are about the blunders and snafus, and of everyday life that most of us can relate to. It's like "Chicken Soup for the Soul" if you threw in snark and expletives. If you like Jenn Mann, Samantha Irby and Jenny Lawson, you will love "We're All A Mess. It's OK." Get a copy for your funniest friends, or for grouchy people, maybe it will cheer them up. The book is an easy read and offers a real message that we all can survive, even the worst of failures and ultimately, even though we're all a mess, it's OK. Snarky women, quip, short stories, essays, funny, humorous essays, humor essays, gifts for women, funny stories, dating, relationships, failures, work, family, cats, dogs, alpacas.

    Unfortunately they have no real resources, no good plans, and no idea what the hell they're doing. What they do have is an army of foul-mouthed monkeys who want them dead, a beautiful woman who wants some answers, a sex-crazed tribal chief, a caffeine-addicted demigod who wants to be worshipped, and a telepathic skull who just wants a little excitement. Through nonstop comedy and good old-fashioned adventure these guys are facing some long odds but do Ron and Willy give up? No they don't. They get down to business. Monkey Business.

    

    Celebrated columnist Adair Lara polled her readers for life-lessons learned the hard way and compile their priceless counsel, including: If someone offers you a breath mint, take it. Never continue dating anyone who is rude to the waiter. Take Spanish, not German. Whenever people say they hate to say something, they actually love to say it. Never fry bacon in the nude. Wear cheap pants if you must, but never cheap shoes. With whimsical illustrations by Roxanna Bikadoroff, and a healthy dose of humor that's just what the doctor ordered, Normal is Just a Setting on the Dryer equips you with hard-won wisdom to take on the real real world.

    But he was so much more, a comic Garrison Keillor-like figure whose unique voice transcended the airwaves and affected a whole generation of nostalgic Americans.The Ferrari in the Bedroom is Shepherd's wry, affectionate look at the hang-ups and delusions of Americans in the 1970s. From his sardonic assessment of fads such as the nostalgia craze ("Thinking that the old days were good is a terrible sickness. Everything was just as bad then as it is now.") to a modest proposal for the foundation of S.P.L.A.T. (The Society for the Prevention of the Leaving of Animal Turds), Jean Shepherd provides a generous measure of his special brand of wise and warm humor as an antidote for some of America's more ridiculous obsessions.

    A young priest on the other side of the screen is shaken by what he learns. A former college athlete with an MBA from a prestigious university, Father Joe Russo is not your typical man of God. Nine years earlier, his own life took a tragic turn and he gave everything up, committing his life to the church. Now his peaceful existence is being tested, and he finds himself questioning the God he serves, the vows he made, and someone he left behind.In this gripping thriller, a priest and an FBI agent work to uncover secrets and expose hidden crimes, but when it seems they have it all figured out, everything they think they know will be questioned.

    Elaine Ambrose boldly writes her latest kiss-my-attitude book as a sassy sequel to Midlife Cabernet. Ambrose shares her festive life experiences and career-crushing anecdotes as she explains how to remain relevant after age 50, why grown children make great travel companions, and how to balance midlife without falling over. Ambrose notes that her feminine mystique sprung a leak after years of competing as a funny female in a serious male job market. Now the hard work is done, and she invites midlife women to join her for Happy Hour.

    The perfect holiday gift for fans of the world’s favorite feline!MAKE WAY FOR GARFIELD!The tubby tabby is back, and he's livin' larger than ever! So whether he's enveloping Pooky in his Herculean hug, arguing with the talking scale, or munching on his masterpiece, the Leaning Tower of Pizza, Garfield's motto is always the same: Bigger is better!

    She will do anything to protect her family, even if that means giving up what she wants the most, a life with Santano“Tan” Morales. Tan knows that something is going on between Kia and his father but is not sure what. Tan has a lot on his plate with trying to keep his ex-wife’s advances at bay and finding out the secrets his wife and father are keeping from him. Will Kia trust Tan enough to confide in him? Sable Mills thought she had escaped her troubled past life in Nashville. Her controlling father was dead, and so was her cheating husband, thanks to being rescued by Kole Morales. Unfortunately, her past finds her and threatens to take away her newfound freedom. Can Kole save the woman he is falling for? Or will his secrets come back to not only haunt him but Sable as well? The D-City Squad comes together for one final ride, to battle new and old enemies. Viper and the crew will have to deal with more lies and drama. But will all of them make it out with their lives?

    The 100 Best Yo Mama Jokes.

    This hilarious 233 page full-color book contains over 400 of cartoonist, Chad Carpenter's latest comic creations. Consisting of anything animal, vegetable or mineral, but with a decidedly outdoorsy slant, this award-winning comic strip takes an offbeat view of the woodsy side of life. Find out for yourself why TUNDRA is one of the fastest-growing comic strips on the planet!

    Enjoy these hilarious stories about stupid criminals, their hilarious attempts at crime, and bizarre mistakes they made that prevented them from getting away with their crimes.

    However, life steps in and derails their happily ever after train. His street life. Her attorney life. Less communication. More arguments. Exes. New interests. All of these play a role in pushing the couple further apart instead of together. Goo and Candy are strong alphas and don't take any mess from anyone. However, is their love strong enough to survive the catalysts and chaos surrounding them? Will they ever get back onto the happily ever after train? Or, is life as they know it will be lived separately with other people? Get updated on familiar characters and get introduced to new characters in this new blazing urban romance by best-selling authors Twyla T and Patrice Balark.

    

    In the last five years alone, the bit rate of commercial point-to-point links has grown from 2.5 Gb/s to 40 Gb/s-and that figure is expected to more than double over the next two years! Such astonishing progress can be both inspiring and frustrating for professionals who need to stay abreast of important new developments in the field. Now Fiber-Optic Communication Systems, Second Edition makes that job a little easier. Based on its author's exhaustive review of the past five years of published research in the field, this Second Edition, like its popular predecessor, provides an in-depth look at the state of the art in fiber-optic communication systems. While engineering aspects are discussed, the emphasis is on a physical understanding of this complex technology, from its basic concepts to the latest innovations. Thoroughly updated and expanded, Fiber-Optic Communication Systems, Second Edition: * Includes 30% more information, including four new chapters focusing on the latest lightwave systems R&D * Covers fundamental aspects of lightwave systems as well as a wide range of practical applications * Functions as both a graduate-level text and a professional reference * Features extensive references and chapter-end problem sets.