Witty and unexpected, this collection of customer reviews is sure to show you a new, hilarious, and completely candid side of Amazon products and reviews you never knew existed.

    But, as Rowland says, she would be lying if she said she wasn't also a little freaked out about what had just happened to her body, as well as by many overwhelming new thoughts and emotions. It was a good thing that Dr. Tristan Bickman, Rowland's OB/GYN for the last 14 years, was there, day and night, to answer every single question that popped into her head, no matter how raunchy. With Dr. Bickman no topic is off-limits, and she provided Rowland with the reassurance she so desperately needed, telling her over and over that, in the months after a woman gives birth, nothing is exactly strange--but nothing is necessarily normal, either.There are so many guides to what our kids need, from the time they're the size of a poppy seed to the time they start kindergarten. But what about what the mother needs? In Whoa, Baby!, Rowland and Dr. Bickman team up to cover everything a new mom needs to know: the gross physical stuff; the hormonal and emotional stuff ("Why am I crying five times a day when this is the happiest I've ever been?"); and the just plain weird stuff ("Why did my nipples change colors?"). Listeners will simultaneously cringe in agony and shriek with laughter at the scenarios Rowland and Dr. Bickman describe ("What happens if I fall asleep with the pump on?"; "Why does sex still hurt when I had a C-section?"; "Why are my legs so swollen?").

    Still, when she and her husband call it quits, leaving her more broke than ever, Link makes a seemingly impossible resolution: to hang on to her northern Michigan farm and continue to raise her boys on well water and wood chopping and dirt. Armed with an unfailing sense of humor and her three resolute accomplices, Link confronts blizzards and coyotes, learns about Zen divorce and the best way to butcher a hog, dominates a zucchini-growing contest and wins a year's supply of local bread, masters the art of bargain cooking, deals with rampaging poultry, and finds her way to a truly rich existence. Told with endless heart and candor, Bootstrapper is a story of motherhood and survival and self-discovery, of an indomitable woman who, against all the odds, holds on to what matters most.

    She gave a TED talk sharing how she explained the birds and the bees to her eight-year-old daughter, Mulan, which ignited an incredible response. Now, when it comes to talking about motherhood, people want to hear what Julia has to say. If It’s Not One Thing, It’s Your Mother is her compilation of stories, revealing her painfully funny adventures and her poignant personal story of deciding to adopt as a single woman, her transition to traditional family after she married and took on the new role of at-home mother, and her insightful open-eyed wonder at the whole concept of motherhood for herself and others, too.From being mistaken as her daughter’s grandmother to her theory that people who can’t make friends often resort to making children, Julia imparts a cutting edge, contemporary take on parenting, displaying a definite appreciation for the absurd. Poignant, provocative, and wise, Julia writes about parenting as only she can, laying out her mother-daughter experiences with religion, nannies, pets, schools, and much more.A joy to read, this is one of the most amusing, and at times powerful, modern books on parenting.

    His hilarious syndicated newspaper column and numerous best-selling books have sparked the kind of adulation that's often reserved for rock stars or world leaders. His wit cuts right to the core of life's absurdities.In My Teenage Son's Greatest Goal in Life Is to Make Me Feel 3,500 Years Old and Other Thoughts on Parenting from Dave Barry, Dave shares his hopes, fears, and insights about his own stint as a father. Most people make babies out to be very complicated, but the truth is they have only three moods: Mood One: Just about to cry. Mood Two: Crying. Mood Three: Just finished crying.

    Having longed for children since before she can remember, she was suddenly faced with an array of unfamiliar, unexpected and sometimes downright embarrassing emotional and physical reactions. And when Poppy (and a year later Daisy) was born she had to learn a whole new set of skills.From trying to conceive and a first positive pregnancy test to Poppy's first birthday, Minus Nine To One takes you through the worries, surprises, excitement, miracles and sheer bloody hard work that Jools - and all new mums in their own different ways - have to cope with along the way. As Jools writes, 'This certainly isn't meant to be read as a guidebook, or a medical reference book - it is simply my story and I hope that you can relate to it in some way (and maybe even relax with it in the bath!).'Down to earth, personal and very, very funny, this is the book no aspiring mother will want to be without.

    With reassuring, down-to-earth advice, Tracy Hogg's practical sleep programme will help you overcome your baby's sleep problems and works with infants from as young as a day old.

    The joys and travails of building a home in Baja California.

    I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. —from the IntroductionActual reader feedback: "I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don't believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist." "I'll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You're an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you." Now with 16 Pages of Photos and a New Introduction

    

    The bloke can write. He rhapsodizes about heroin better than anyone since Jim Carroll. With the flick of his enviable pen, he can summarize childhood thus: ‘My very first utterance in life was not a single word, but a sentence. It was, ‘Don’t do that.’... Russell Brand has a compelling story." — New York Times Book ReviewThe gleeful and candid New York Times bestselling autobiography of addiction, recovery, and rise to fame from Russell Brand, star of Forgetting Sarah Marshall and one of the biggest personalities in comedy today.Picking up where he left off in My Booky Wook, movie star and comedian Russell Brand details his rapid climb to fame and fortune in a shockingly candid, resolutely funny, and unbelievably electrifying tell-all: Booky Wook 2. Brand’s performances in Arthur, Get Him to the Greek, and Forgetting Sarah Marshall have earned him a place in fans’ hearts; now, with a drop of Chelsea Handler’s Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang, a dash of Tommy Lee’s Dirt, and a spoonful of Nikki Sixx’s The Heroin Diaries, Brand goes all the way—exposing the mad genius behind the audacious comic we all know (or think we know) and love (or at least, lust).

    The #1 "New York Times" Bestselling Author of "A Man Called Ove" shares an irresistible and moving collection of heartfelt, humorous essays about fatherhood, providing his newborn son with the perspective and tools he'll need to make his way in the world.

    This book is that record. But it is also something else: maybe the funniest, most unsparing account of ordinary daily household life ever recorded, from the point of view of the man inside. The remarkable thing about this story isn’t that Lewis is so unusual. It’s that he is so typical. The only wonder is that his wife has allowed him to publish it.

    It will teach prospective fathers, in no-nonsense terms, how to survive the first 24 hours; how to Prepare and Plan to Prevent Poor Parental Performance; how to maintain morale in the ranks; how to feed, clothe, transport, and entertain your troops; how to transport the troops successfully on maneuvers; how to increase your "flash to bang" time and "square away" tasks along the way; and much more. Let training commence.

    Friends, family, colleagues, the UPS delivery guy—suddenly everybody is a trove of advice, much of it contradictory and confusing. With dire warnings of what will happen if baby is fed on demand and even direr warnings of what will happen if he isn't, not to mention hordes of militant “lactivists,” cosleeping advocates, and books on what to worry about next, modern parenthood can seem like a minefield. In busy Mom-friendly short essays, Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay delivers the empathetic straight dirt on parenting, tackling everything from Mommy & Me classes (“Your baby doesn't need to be making friends at three months old—you do! But not with people you'll meet at Mommy & Me”) to attachment parenting (“If you're holding your baby 24/7, that's not a baby, that's a tumor”). Stefanie Wilder-Taylor combines practical tips with sidesplitting humor and refreshing honesty, assuring women that they can be good mothers and responsibly make their own choices. A witty and welcome antidote to trendy parenting texts and scarifying case studies, Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay provides genuine support, encouragement, and indispensable common-sense advice.